Carry On For Aeons @insert-unicorn-here - Tumblr Blog

Phoebe Buffay belongs in the Good Place!

Yesterday at FYE i bought a plushie and dude didnt give me a bag just the boy and a receipt and i was like "hey bro can you give me a bag i really dont wanna be carrying this around the mall" and he was like "why are you ashamed to carry him"

xtec

"WHY are you ashamed of your SON? "

unclefather

misplaced-syllables-deactivated

just wanna sit on his lap and feel him get hard

ndiecity-deactivated20241101

Leave the mall santas alone

hilarioushumorfromouterspace

alexander

this is a mood

greedyteen

hearing “im so proud of you” when you feel like you aren’t doing enough really lifts some weight off your shoulders

animusrox

“Why would you say something so controversial yet so brave?”

smegbertmarbles

The Joker Shoots Eric Andre, but another identical Eric Andre walks out from the curtain and keeps doing the interview like nothing happened

dankmemeuniversity

rosalitadiazz-deactivated202003

hymnsofheresy

i opened the window to hear the sound of rufus wainwright’s cover of “hallelujah” and it put me in such a existential Mood that i was contemplating about my relationship with God. and then bam came smashmouth’s all star. i realized this dude was just playing the shrek soundtrack for fun which caused me to have a spiritual moment for three whole minutes.

hymnsofheresy

ACCORDING TO MY ROOMATE…. SOMEONE WAS THROWING A SHREK THEMED PARTY. EVERYONE WAS DRESSED AS SHREK.

lesbianrustcohle

I still can’t believe that fanfiction is free

I sometimes have to pay for water, but with a phone and some wifi, I get to read whole novels about my favorite characters for exactly zero additional dollars

How goddamn rad is that

shockblanketnightmares-deactiva

all the love to the fanfic authors who make this possible, y'all are the best

maxknightley

How come period pieces are almost always dramas, anyway? I want to watch a sitcom about a dude in renaissance-era Tuscany trying to get rich quick by scamming the local merchant princes.

fullyfunctionalminiaturebeehive

I feel it is my sovereign duty to point out that, once upon a time, pineapples were so rare and sought after, such an absurdly expensive status symbol, that *only royalty could afford to buy them*, and even then they - get this - RENTED THEM OUT. Royalty, RENTING OUT PINEAPPLES.

It would start with like the highest dukes and duchesses when it was pretty green and progressing down to mere earls and shit by the time it got, you know, actually edible, at which point their majesties would take it back and *eat it*, like g-d intended.

Please, bearing this in mind, imagine the possibilities of Pineapple Fraud in a period comedy.

4damien

Anyone can help!

(Real pen the last picture)

It is important for EVERYONE to know how to help ANYONE. Not everyone can give them selves their medicine under every circumstance. Be educated, help out.

In the last year, i have gotten about five new violent allergies from foods i used to be able to eat. Next time i eat a fruit, my throat could close. I may not be able to inject myself. My boyfriend and i played with my trainer pen for like 30 minutes. He knows how to inject it. I know how. This is important.

spaci1701

Be sure to count out the five seconds you hold the needle down for!

In an emergency your time sense can go wonky so make sure you not only count it out loud but that you give it a couple of extra seconds to be certain.

pink-hydrangea

Thank you for clarifying it can go through clothes, that’s something I didn’t know! I would have wasted valuable time trying to get clothes out of the way just on instinct, so it’s important this was cleared up!

plantain-emoji

May your next period be light and end quickly

plantain-emoji

This is literally now my favorite post ever, because its become thousands of reblogs consisting of passing on good fortune. Meanwhile many of y’all added your own comments saying your thanks, and continuing the chain by adding your own little bit of wishful thinking. You are all wonderful.