So I haven't written anything about this in detail after passing the Bar exam. Results for the November 2022 Bar exam came out last April 14, 2023. I took the oath and signed the roll of attorneys last May 2 at the PICC.
I have an unfinished post in my drafts about me failing the 2019 exam. I honestly don't know what I wanted to write back then but I will still write about it as much as I can remember.
You see, the review during the Bar is one of the most stressful moments of my life that I actually forgot some details of my life because of it. It's still not as bad as what happened to my brain because of the pandemic and during the pandemic, but still.
Last 2019, I stayed in Manila for the review. The review center was walking distance from the place where I stayed. I was with another classmate that time and she passed the 2019 Bar. Anyway, it was so stressful that time because of the limited water supply. I remember always coming home here in Pampanga because I didn't want to deal with that stress there. Not to mention the long queues at the elevator that I just didn't want to go out anymore.
My stay there was stressful, and humbling. It was also sad. I remember the first nights there I wasn't eating and I was just crying myself to sleep because it was so sad not being with my family. I'm at an unfamiliar place dealing with the lack of water - it really added to the stress.
However, I was also happy because whenever I go home, I get to bring my sisters pasalubong in the form of food. I always bought them Kyochon, and also 24 Chicken. It was really nice.
I also learned how to commute although my route is basically just that - bus to Avenida, then LRT to our place. I never thought I'd ride the LRT but hey, it's cheap, and it's really the easiest way to get there.
I know I'm going to fail the Bar exams because of my answers. I was able to answer everything but I know I didn't answer correctly in most of the Remedial Law questions. I knew that it would be a huge miracle if I passed the exam.
And yes, I failed. I expected that so the blow was somehow lessened but since it was the start of the pandemic when the results were released, it was really a stressful time for us in the family. I still felt like a failure and I felt like a loser.
The next Bar exam was conducted in February 2022. I didn't apply that time because they wanted it to push through in 2021 and the pandemic situation was still not better by then so I just let it go.
Things were somehow getting better in 2022 so I just applied for the November 2022 Bar exam.
The previous exam (the one after the 2019 exam) introduced the digital mode of conducting the exam. They adopted the method in the November 2022 Bar exam, and they'll be adopting in all Bar exams already.
So in May, if I'm not mistaken, I applied for the Bar exams. I enrolled in review classes which started in June 2022. Boy was it all so difficult because I wasn't studying since after the November 2019 exam. I was busy keeping my family alive during the pandemic years because I was the only one going out. I was trying to hold my shit together that time even though my mental health was at an all time chaotic level already.
It was difficult but I was also having fun because now I'm just at home, studying at my own pace, just watching the uploaded recorded review lectures, and basically sleeping to their voices.
I was at home, I was able to cook food, do the chores, be able to bathe without that schedule because we have a constant supply of running water - basically I was just chill in terms of my living circumstances.
In the middle of this all I suddenly was nurturing a broken heart from my favorite mistake that I made in May 2022. LOL. Halfway through July I got my heart broken even though I was not really in love and it can be seen in my posts here during that time because, hey, I needed a fucking outlet for me to be able to soldier on.
Of course I was still stressed during the review. The lack of updates from the Bar chair was so stressful for us as well. Fortunately there was no major problem that came my way in terms of that.
During the review, in August, a new location in Genshin Impact opened which is Sumeru. I was so excited to play it because the location looked really nice and soothing so when it dropped, I played it, while also listening to the lectures.
I was just mindlessly strolling through Sumeru and opening teleport waypoints while listening to the lecture. I guess it helped in my review because I can give my attention to the lecture without getting sleepy. I can't really just sit and listen - I MUST DO SOMETHING.
This is what I learned about myself even when I was in Manila. For me to be able to absorb information better and not get sleepy, I need to do something. I remember in 2019 that I was cleaning my room when listening to lectures. Or when I'm at home, I'm at the kitchen doing the dishes and cooking while listening. And it helps me learn better.
So yea, now when I'm in Sumeru I'm reminded of that time that I was reviewing. I even remember telling myself that I'll tell this story of how I was exploring Sumeru while reviewing and how it was helpful to me.
The local testing center which I chose was at San Beda University. I stayed at a place there called LA Suites - I reserved through Airbnb. Initially, I was just going to stay there for the night and go home after every exam but the first exam day, when I went home, it was so fucking tiring that I decided to just suck it up and stay there for the rest of the exam days.
The place where I stayed was nice. It's just located at the 3rd floor. The ground floor has so many food establishments and a laundromat. There's an Alfamart too, and MiniStop nearby. There's 7-11 too but it's on the other side of the road. If I walk a little further, there's a grocery store (Super 8?) nearby. Rex Bookstore is also just there.
I survived there even though there's no refrigerator nor stove by bringing a rice cooker and an ice box. Every day, I would buy ice to last me through the day. I've ordered food from either FoodPanda or GrabFood, or I just bought stuff outside.
I was with Danny too since he also stayed there. We would often ask each other what food we'll buy and one of us will order for the other and just deliver it to their room.
Ms. Evelyn - the caretaker - was also really nice. We chat for a bit while she's cleaning my room and, it was really just nice talking to someone.
So the Bar exams came and Danny and I would go there together in the morning. Dra. Che was also there but in a different room. We would often meet up at lunch and talk. One time we ate at Jollibee after the exams. On the first Sunday, Danny and I ate at the unlimited shabu-shabu and samgyupsal restaurant located on the ground floor of the building where we're staying.
I remember the password for the first exam was related to Sherlock Holmes. Me being the Sherlock fan that I am was just so happy when I read it that even though the exam was quite difficult I wasn't really stressed out.
I admit that there are a lot of things that I didn't know. There were a lot of questions where I was unsure of my answers. However, the fact that the exam was digital and I can erase and change my answers and I can first skip questions was God-send. I will never shut up about the fact that it's the modality of the exam which made me pass the exam. If that was the traditional pen-and-booklet exam, I would've failed again. So I'm really thankful for that because I was able to articulate my answers and maybe I was able to give a semblance of the correct answer even in my uncertainty.
The last day of the exam, I told Natz if he can be there. He was there together with his girlfriend, and Oni was there too. We ate at KFC and just chatted and laughed out loud. I didn't feel sad - I was thinking that I passed. I got this. I didn't want to be overconfident of course but I also wanted to manifest that I already passed because I don't want to go through that again.
I've learned about manifesting during my heartbreak so I guess me experiencing a heartbreak was actually the world introducing new things to me such as that one? HAHAHAHA.
The release of the results was one of the happiest moments of my life. Seeing my name there finally, it was exhilarating.
I may have forgotten some details here so if ever that's the case I'll just make a separate post but for now, I'll just end this. Hopefully I haven't forgotten some important details that when I look back at this post, I'll be amazed at myself for being able to include so much detail into this journey.
