Insulin-aholic

\\ T1D since age four. Choir geek.  Policy debater.  WriMo. // This is my T1D blog, focused on all things diabetes.  Ask me anything, especially if you want a T1D to talk to, and read my book on Wattpad about two diabetics entitled The Road to Ruin.

[chronicallyillchronicles]

What's wrong with injecting more insulin?

Excess insulin causes weight gain and can lead to other problems

[insulin-aholic]

This has been disproven.  It isn’t insulin causing weight gain, and, even if it were, the problems of excessive hyperglycemia are much worse.  Please take care of yourself.  And anyone suffering from diabulimia, please stay strong. I understand the shame of injecting more insulin - it’s like, “Oh no, my endo will see how much insulin this meal was and will call me fat and I am fat.”  There are multiple flaws with this logic though.  While endos are hyperaware at times, I doubt they will ever shame you for an above average meal.  If they do, they shouldn’t be your doctor.  That’s not the right form of care.  Also, injecting more insulin once every so often is not bad 0 it isn’t even bad to do once daily or once every meal.  It will not make you fat.  And, even if you do gain weight, it isn’t a bad thing.  All bodies are beautiful.

I know that won’t help everyone, but I hope it helped someone.

As for everyone else, remember to rock your diabetes, despite whatever issues, possible weight gain, or whatever. :)

[cwote]

Just start.

@sheisrecovering xoxo

[insulin-aholic]

Resolutions

With a new year comes new resolutions.  Often, as if by human nature, we fail these resolutions.  However, I ask that we try to resolve them step-by-step, day-by-day.  I ask that you all remember to:

Drink water.

Eat something.  Maybe some fruit.  Fruit is good.

Change your infusion set.

Change your sensor.

Change your lancet.

Refill your reservoir.

Change your tubing.

Love yourself.

Rock your diabetes.

[insulin-aholic]

Rough Week

Albeit, also a good one.

I’ve had very high blood sugars all day, but that was due to poor guesstimation on my part.

I’ve had a falling out with myself, if that’s a thing.  It is a lot of the reason I have not been active.  My mental health plummeted over Christmas break.  I no longer knew who I was.  This week, however, I’ve gone through some difficult but liberating re-self discovery.  Obviously, I’m not cured.  But I’m past unhealthy bout.  I am past what I would call the hardest part of my life.  I can get past the next hardest part.  So can all of you.

I wish you all good luck with your weeks.  I hope you all feel well and receive numbers in-range for yourselves.  I hope that your New Years have begun well.

Rock your diabetes. ;)

[insulin-aholic]

Gratefulness

I’ve been away from the computer for along time.  I don’t update tumblr, nor wattpad, and you all know that I definitely enjoy writing and sharing my work on here.  I haven't been doing that for awhile, but I’m going to once again. 

Now, I’d like to thank you all for allowing me to reach 569 followers in my time of absence.  Updates may still be slightly sporadic, but I hope to update often.  Rock your diabetes, everyone.  ;)

[utena-gay]

tell me again how psychiatric abuse is somehow the same as conversion therapy

FUCKING TELL ME AGAIN

[maxvista-deactivated20161110]

im all smiles right now lol. today is hilarious man.

[theygender]

goodnight everyone. this day was pretty nice. sweet dreams to all of you

[insulin-aholic]

The Game and Burnout

My last post involved a local college football game that was focused on diabetes awareness.  The post before that was about burnout.  For sure, the game was helpful.  It’s always nice to see my community rallying around my disease.  However, I’m still as frustrated as I was before.  I’m exhausted and angered.  I need a break - but I can’t have one.  Ugh.

Anyways, the game was very cool and I got to see some of my favorite diabuddies that are little, which was definitely nice.

[insulin-aholic]

Our Diabetes Awareness Game at the college was a success!  I’m very happy with the turnout.

[insulin-aholic]

Now for the reason today was the day I returned...

I need to rant to someone who understands.  Or the followers or mine that understand, I should say.  I’ve reached a real period of burnout.  I thought that I had had burnout before, but never have I had it in this way.  Never has it taken me an hour and a half to convince myself to change my site.  Never have I been so lost and confused by my numbers - which is causing me ten times more than the normal amount of stress because I am so busy and need to be in good health to function at my best.  I’m having a rough time and nothing I’ve tried has worked so I just no longer want to try.  I have no diabetics in my close friend group (that is in my close friend group that I see daily, although I have some in the state and a pen pal in another state who I’m getting to know.  These far-off friends are helping, but they can’t be here every day, of course.)  My boyfriend and close friends (nonbetics) are all very sweet and generally want to help, but the girls are usually afraid to ask and the boy loves to take care of me but sometimes it makes my burnout worse?  I know I’m just rambling here and a lot of it is likely incoherent, but do you guys have any methods to get past this burnout?  Would a rewards system work, like something positive when I check my blood?  I dunno.  Send ideas, if you would, for me and others who have burnout right now.  Thank you all and remember to rock your diabetes.

[insulin-aholic]

An Apology

I’ve been gone forever, mainly because I started school again and got WAYYY busy.  I’ll try to come back as often as possible, because the tumblr diabetic community helps me a lot and I love helping its other members.  Sorry for the inactivity!

[thediabetesheroes]

Fructose Fairy Tales…

[wearediabetes-deactivated201804]

Oh my gosh, this is hilarious! 

[insulin-aholic]

Happiness is...

When your new friend always makes sure you're healthy. Everyone is afraid they'll offend me, but this kid just took initiative. He needs a bit of education, but, he's chill. 😊

[insulin-aholic]

Something totally off-topic

Why are wrinkles considered ugly? They show age, yes, but why is that a bad thing? There's a lifetime of laughter and smiles in those lines. Why remove them? Tell me your stories, teach me how you lived, let me learn why you have earned the wrinkles. Don't make them go away.

[cwote]

^^ SUCH AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE ^^

[tencenttoys-deactivated20200422]

And as the sun goes down, I cry myself to sleep...

I’ve reached a point where I am considering all options as valid ones. When I think of everything… Suicide is starting to look more and more like the best option. I no longer have anything to care about. Someone feed my cats are care for them. Take my belongings and give the clothes and means of survival (blankets, pillows, towels, toilet paper, things of that nature…) And make sure that they bring a smile to their faces. Give the insulin to someone who can use it and knows it’s value, Life can be beautiful and because I am not living, doesn’t mean that your life isn’t worth saving. To the music and things I collected. Give them to children who will appreciate and value their worth. Help them grow and evolve into the world. For anything else. May my family take the personal things that reminds them that I cared. To my friends, take what I know makes you smile most. Please burn my body and soul and let it be with the oceans. Scattered my ashes into the world’s most valuable resource for I will be with you all in the end. I have been emotionally compromised for far to long and this is my choice. Do not blame the instrument of my closure. Just know that there is nothing to blame for my action but myself.

[insulin-aholic]

I'm not lying when I say that things get better. My sister felt just like you, and did attempt. Two years later she is the mother of two, with a good-paying job, a nice apartment, and the happiness of her babies to help her along. Things will change. Keep your head up. I am here, always, if you need anything.

[truly-tacenda]

[mewsique]

what do you wish for?