┊⊱╰ &.♦. fractured heart.

this existence wasn't meant to be yours. / ind. CAIRNGORM of houseki no kuni .

[interikvarc]

concept : me making a padparadscha blog

[interikvarc]

i log on just to say what the actual fuck @ the new chapter

[dollcurses-blog]

uh i haven’t made a rp promo in forever but . hi i’m iyak & i’m new to the fandom i guess ? anyway pls LIKE / REBLOG this post if you’re interested in interacting with a PRIVATE & SELECTIVE YUMENO KYŪSAKU / Q from the animanga BUNGOU STRAY DOGS ! extremely oc + crossover friendly , multi-verse etc. thank you !

[interikvarc]

anyway hnk chapter 68 spoiler warning //

okay i’m p much certain cairn is being manipulated bc ?? cairn not giving a fuck about lapis ? HAHA yeah sure

[n-emone]

hello darkness my old friend

[crafter-five]

[latesco-archive-blog]

                            ❝ even god gets lonely at night. ❞

                                                   art source. personals don’t reblog.

[interikvarc]

Hey guys i'm not dead yet

[artofkace]

Cairn sketching

[prudacium-blog]

DASH   ONLY   /   HEAVILY   HEADCANON   BASED   /   PENNED   BY   GIN   .   art credit i.  art credit ii.  template credit .

[screenshotsofdespair]

[hyyhp2]

hey rb and tag a food from your culture that everyone loves but you hate

[kagemxne-blog]

On ‘Genderbending’

Lately I’ve been seeing people discuss why ‘genderbending’ isn’t transphobic, or why it’s something that’s fine and should be accepted. Most of the people who have been discussing this are cis, which is an issue right off the bat, so I’m going to preface this post by saying that if you are not trans, you do not have the right to determine what is or is not transphobic. Full. Stop. So if you’re cis, and your first instinct is to argue with me on this, I would like for you to consider why you believe that you can recognize transphobia better than someone who is routinely subject to it. That being said, let’s get into this. 

To start off, what is ‘genderbending?’ Most fansites will define it as the act of ‘switching’ a character’s gender, but there’s already an issue with this. ‘Genderbending’, or ‘rule 63’ as is called in some circles, it not just about switching a character’s gender, it is about changing that character’s body as well. I have yet to see a ‘genderbent’ version of a male character who lacked breasts and a dfab body. This the first and most obvious reason why ‘genderbending’ is inherently transphobic - it assumes that physical traits and gender are the same thing, and that you cannot be female without also being dfab. This is cissexism, and this is transphobic. The message that ‘genderbending’ says is that you must have breasts and a vagina to be female, and you must have a penis and a flat chest to be male. I should not have to explain why that message is transphobic.

However, the way ‘genderbends’ are carried out also has distinctly transphobic implications in how it switches out the physical traits of characters to make them ‘the opposite gender’ ( the notion of there being ‘opposite genders’ is some fresh bullshit that I’ll cover later in this post ). For example, by giving a male character breasts and curves when ‘genderbending’ him, the message is clear that this character was cis to begin with. ‘Genderbending’ inherently implies that all characters are cisgender by default, and erases any possibility of these characters being trans. This is not as overtly transphobic as the first point, but it is harmful to trans people within fandom spaces, as the assumption that all characters are cis until explicitly stated otherwise pushes us out of media and removes whatever representation we might try to make for ourselves. 

The third issue with ‘genderbending’ is that it is always cis male <—> cis female, and nothing else. I have never seen people ‘genderbend’ characters by making them nonbinary or intersex. I have never seen a genderbend of a female character which made her a trans male instead. ‘Genderbending’ implies that there are only two options when it comes to gender: cis male and cis female. There is no such thing as nonbinary people within this ideology. Intersex people are laughable at best. Agender people are little better than a distant myth. ‘Genderbending’ ignores that it is impossible to make a character ‘the opposite gender’, because there is no such thing as an ‘opposite gender’. Gender is a spectrum, not a binary, but you wouldn’t know that from the way fandom spaces treat it. 

Of course, there are some reasons for ‘genderbending’ cis male characters into cis females that will always get brought up in discussions on the politics of ‘genderbending.’ The most frequent is that cis girls, who only see themselves as one-dimensional characters in media, want to have characters like them who are just as multifaceted and developed as the male characters that we are given, so they make their male faves female to give themselves the representation they desire. This is a decent reason for ‘genderbending’, but it does not excuse the fact that the way in which ‘genderbending’ is done is inherently transphobic, and it gives fans yet another excuse to ignore female characters in favor of focusing on their male faves. 

Another reason for ‘genderbending’ that I’ve heard is ‘it’s for the sake of character exploration - like, what if this character had been born as male/female instead?’ This excuse is cissexist and transphobic from first blush. The idea behind it is that someone ‘born as female’, aka with breasts/vagina will automatically be a cis female, allowing fans to explore what that character’s life would have been like if they were female. Why not explore the possibility of a character being designated female at birth, but still identifying as male? Why do you need a character to be cis for you to find their personality and life interesting to explore? Why do you automatically reject the notion of your fave being trans? If you want to explore what it would have been like for your male fave to have struggled with sexism, consider them being a trans woman, or a closeted dfab trans person.

As a closing statement, I want to make one thing very clear. ‘Genderbending’ does harm trans people. It perpetuates dangerous cissexist notions and the idea of a gender binary being a valid construct, erases nonbinary and intersex people, and others trans people. These are what we call microaggressions - they are not as dangerous as outright harassment and assault, but they enforce and support a system and ideology in which we are other, and we are worthy of hate and violence because we do not fit in. 

‘Genderbending’ is a transphobic practice, and if you engage in it, you need to be aware of and acknowledge this.

[interikvarc]

┊⊱╰ &. ♦️ PHOSPHOPHYLLITE ( ? )

   IT   WAS   TRULY   UNSETTLING     how   this   pure  white   battered   onto  their   eyesight,   though  the   left   eye   had   been  slightly   cloudier   than  the   other   since  the   day   they  left   for   the   other   gems.      there   wasn’t   a   single   spot   of   green   grass  or   the   blue  ocean,   making   this  place   as   alien  as   it   felt  in   their   hands    ;    BUT   THEY   COULD   TELL   THE   TALE   OF   DISSOLVING   THE   BEST   ANYWAY.      they   soon   catch  onto   the   fact  that   their   partner  has   noticed   them  already        ———        maybe  these   eyes   weren’t  so   useless   after  all    /    BUT   O’   HOW   OLD   THEY   WERE    /    fit   to   be   with   the   rest   of   their   body  after   their   experience  of   having   seen     FAR   MORE     than   they  should   have   in   their   young  years.     of   course  now,   the   lack  of   physical   distance  between   them    &    cairngorm   has   become  a   thing   paid  with   less   attention,  though   they   are   aware   that  the   emotions   the   other   felt  could   very   well  be   safely   tucked  into   a   FIST   right   now.

   THEIR   RESPONSE   MAKES   THEM   WANT   TO   LIGHTEN   UP   A   BIT,   but   there’s   a   falseness   in   their   voice   that   they  have   learned   to   notice   from  sensei        ———        how   sad   that  lies   can’t   just  slip   past   their  IGNORANCE   like   this  anymore.      it   worries  them,   but   then  again    ;    their  body   has   been  a   constantly   nervous  wreck   ever   since  setting   foot   on   this   planet,  so   like   the   ship   of   theseus   they  were   supposed   to   embody,   BUT   WHERE   WERE   THE   TROJANS   WHEN   IT   WAS   TIME   TO   BE   FIXED   AGAIN?           ❛        uh…        ❜           being  without   words   is   something   that  had   rarely   happened  since   they   had   obtained   lapis’  head,   but   only  when   the   other  gem   moved,   was   it   that   they  found   their   vocal  cords   again.            ❛        i   just  wanted   to   say…      i   am   certain   this  isn’t   what   you   had   HOPED   for   it   to   be,   but   i   have  discussed   it   with  aechmea.      there   might  be   a   way   to   return  the   gems   to   their   original  state.        ❜           they   don’t   even  smile,   because   they   know   it’s  not   necessarily   a   positive   thing    ;    they   were  so   damn   torn,    THEIR   LIMBS   FEELING   AS   IF  CRACKS  WERE   ON   THE   VERGE   OF  BEING  SPLIT   OPEN.      have   they  come   here   to   shed   light  onto   sensei’s   true  purpose   or   did   they   just  want   to   see   antarc   again?      for   the   first  time,   even   lapis’  head   could   not   present   them  a   clear   answer    &    ah,        ————        THE   ALLOY   WAS   LEAKING   ONCE   AGAIN.

——–  for    a    brief    passing    of    time   ,   they     notice     how     insincere     their    words     sound    ;   of     course   ,   phos     must    have     noticed    it    ,    too   (    lapis   could    )   .   though   ,    there    is     nothing     else     they    can    say   ;    the     haze    of     cairn’s    mind     is    just    as    heavy     as    their    body     is    .    the    moon    ,    lunarians    ,    the    dust    made    of     gem    shards      —     all     of     it    feels    too     sudden    ,     too     quick    (    too    suspicious     ,    even    )   .   cairngorm    is    far   from    trusting     .

&     yet   ,  they    still     trust     phos   .   even    if    their    own    body    cracked     as    a    reaction     to     the     fate    of     the     taken     gems    (   including    their    beloved    )   ,   they    still     do    .     

even     so    ,    the     idea    of     bringing   others    back    seems     absurd   (    gems   ,   turned    into     shards    ,    crushed    into    even    smaller    pieces    ;   no     matter     how      much    effort    was    put     into    it     ,    only    a    fool    would    allow    themselves    to    believe    that    it    was    going    to    be    successful   )   .      ❛      phos   ,   i’m    not    stupid   .    i   knew     from    the    start    that    it    would    be     impossible    to    bring    them    back  .      ❜      (    if    it    was    true   ,   then    why    did    it    hurt    so    much    ?    the    crushing    realization    &    the    shattering    of     hope    ?      )       —    their    position    switches    ,    &    they    see    white   ,   once    again   (   it    reminds    them    of    winter   -   but    it    feels    much    colder    )   .  

winter   .

the    train    of    thoughts   trying    to    disperse    is    cut    short    -   the    sight    of    the    alloy    makes    cairn    visibly    flinch    .    though   ,   the    brief    fear    is    replaced    with    a    peculiar    tugging    at    their    metaphorical    heart    (    even    if     it’s    simply    a    flaw    of    their    species    )   ;   words   dying    on     cairn’s    tongue    before    they    bloom  .  

their    gaze    is    diverted   -   the    feeling    is    still    there   ,   yet    they   don’t    dare    move    /    tone   ,   albeit    scarcely    sounding   ,   slashes    through    the    silence    in   a    way    that    is    way    too    unfitting    .      ❛      antarc .    you   ...   really    wish    to    see    them    again    ?      ❜       ——–of    course    they    do    ;    the    inquiry    seems    aimless    .   /   despite    this    ,    it    feels    like    there    is     something    else   -   another    reason    for    this   .   

lapis     was    the    most    perceptive    gem    they    had    ever    known   ,   after    all.   

they    felt    like    a    mess    ,   still   -  the    question    couldn’t    be    held    back    (   could    it    be    that    they    were    desperately    clutching    at    the    remains    of    blue    &   gold  ,   as    selfish    as    it    was   ?    )      ❛      there   is     ...    another    reason    ,    right   ?     ❜     a    vial    of    time    ,    &    they    exhale   .     ❛      just    forget    it    .   like   i   said   ,   i    want    to    rest   .      ❜

[interikvarc]

okay but like.........help me choose pls

[interikvarc]

alright ! I’m finally here & I’m gonna be updating my theme / making a new promo / psd etc.

[interikvarc]

sorry for inactivity ( once again ) !! I’m going to an English competition in another town so i probably won’t be online until later

[interikvarc]

Okay so i didn't fail the test but the test failed me