Introspective Insomniac

Trina/ / 21/ / Twenty One Pilots / / Skeleton Clique / / Stay Alive |-/

[pantaloonwarrior]

[voldsoys]

I wanna get out there, but I don't try // I've been this way, I want to change

[nightnaut96]

White tank top Tyler

[mikelogan]

Visit Original Link

tyler singing “summertime sadness” on the quiet is violent tour and his vessel speech [video]

[xiaoguiwang]

blocking isnt enough i need to deactivate other people’s accounts

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

[tytranosaurusrex]

becoming an adult is essentially having all your friends in different cities and permanently missing someone

[csavent]

hello! its normal to "not believe" your own trauma and to doubt yourself! its normal to not remember the details of your trauma! you can trust yourself. you arent lying to yourself. im sorry that happened to you, but it was real. i believe you.

[hel7l7]

I WAS MATURE FOR MY AGE BUT I WAS STILL A CHILD!!!

[bpd00m]

when your partner is a childhood sexual trauma survivor

be patient. lots of times we may have unhealthy and complicated relationships with sex & the way we view ourselves and sensuality

understand that you're not at fault. crying during sexi timez or having to stop in the middle & having breakdowns are all due to our trauma n what we associate with intimacy

things can get ugly. every so often we might have a breakdown over what's happened to us. we feel violated, robbed, dirty, tainted, like our body isn't ours, we crave the innocence that was stolen from us.

even if we're recovered or recovering, it still comes up. its something we carry everywhere we go, we can't forget about it. as much as you wish we could just get over it, we can't. we've tried. it doesn't work that way.

hypersexuality & sex repulsion. we may go through cycles of being constantly h0rny or completely uninterested in sex- especially around trauma dates. it's our body & minds way of coping, they're on their own timer.

we're frustrated and tired too. it's so defeating when we have to stop in the middle of it. it feels like SHIT when we can't please you. you might feel unwanted or like we're not attracted to you, but we are. we have this mental block that's preventing us from doing what we want to do & enjoying it. it's completely our own thing & not bc you've done something.

if we have to stop, pls be understanding and gentle. it can be very easy for us to feel guilty & at fault over it.

please don't be angry towards or threaten to hurt the abuser(s)

very minuscule things could trigger flashbacks or breakdowns, we can feel pathetic for it, just pls don't view us as weak

we may change very quickly. while you miss the person we were a while back, chances are we do too. you are not the cause of these changes, it's apart of healing & possibly connected to trauma dates

it gets worse before it gets better. trauma-based/centred therapy is extremely difficult to go through. we may have more breakdowns, outbursts, flashbacks, etc. but it will get better as it goes on.

please believe, support, and listen to us. we've dealt with victim blaming (including from ourselves), ppl telling us we're lying, questioning ourselves on if it even happened, hate, etc.

take care of yourself. your happiness & well-being are extremely important.

don't be afraid or ashamed to reach out for help. we know this all affects you too. if you need to look in to counselling or support groups for yourself- please do. we'll support you 100%

don't forget or neglect your own boundaries. your limits and needs are equally important as ours.

know that we're still the same person from before you learned what we went through. we are not victims. we're survivors, we're human beings.

[styrke-deactivated20240722]

it can be really difficult, triggering and emotionally draining to recognise, acknowledge and realise your traumas. it can feel like your mental health is worsening upon seeing the full picture of what happened to you and how it’s affecting you now. whether it has been days, weeks, years or even decades since the traumas were formed, i want you to know that it’s okay to have a hard time facing them. more than okay. it’s okay to feel like it’s impossible or even counterproductive at times. your brain is trying to protect you. it’s okay. i know it’s hard, but you can do it. you can work through it and soon enough you’ll feel warm, safe and comfortable again. be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel the way you do. it’ll get better, i promise.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

you’ll never “just get over it”. it’ll always be there a little bit, tucked away somewhere. you’ll continue to live your life and not notice it much. but maybe every so often it’ll hurt again and that’s alright. our traumas don’t magically go away when we heal. but they also stop taking up so much space.

[darkalleysunflower]

“There’s a certain way I talk about the things I don’t talk about. Maybe that’s true for all of us. We have ways of closing off the conversation so that we don’t ever get directly asked what we can’t bear to answer.” -John Green, just fully fucking me up tonight

[goodreadss]

[electraheart2012]

Growing up feels like your skin no longer fits. Like you just want to crawl out of that thinly stretched space and lay down in the grass and sob for hours. Instead, I am in a cafe eating lunch and trying not to scream. Looking around wondering if anyone else in this building is doing the same thing, wondering if they ever have and, if so, how they got through it. Maybe I would calm down if I just had the assurance that other people have looked in the mirror and no longer recognized themselves.

— Kalyn RoseAnne Livernois, from Ten True Things

[pissvortex]

[thx]