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endocathexis

A. Hering’s Death and the Maiden - edit, version 2 & 3

v. 1

booniesbride

my last polaroid of 2020

sparklingjohannasaesthetics

invinsibyl-blog

No celesti has ever been in hell as long as I have. Turns out hell makes our hair change from white to silver

#LiamLA #Hell #celesti #outpost

menpale

So I’m a Raven now

I’m not just honorary anymore. I’m a full-blown, feathered Raven. Grady took Ping’s feather from me and gave it back as mine. I’m officially part of the spec ops team that was sent directly from General Whitmore.

I’m terrified.

I mean I’m honored that they want to take me in as a full member, but I’m just worried that I won’t be able to keep up. They’re THE RAVENS. I’m just a scavenger from a team I couldn’t keep together. I’m afraid I’m going to fail them. I failed Caleb already. If any of the Ravens were on that Grayson mission he would have been found in a heartbeat. He may not have even died in the first place. What if something like that happens again? I could barely handle being responsible for what happened to Caleb this time. I don’t want to know what would happen if I’m the reason for the harm of anyone else on the team.

Maybe I need to just let this all sink in

#L

avesatanas333

Leaving California

Liam walks in to L.A’s cabin to gather the last of her things before New York Cherry moves in. She doesn’t have much in there to being with..most of her shit has already made its way to the Ravens’ cabin. She packs up all of her snacks, and makes sure to hit all of the secret hiding spots where she kept her Spaghettos. She pulls the caution tape and Boston post cards off of her bunk that hasn’t been slept in in months. “At least it’ll actually get some use now,” she thought as she packed her decorations into her backpack. She slings her bag over her right shoulder and looks all around the room. She looks at all of the bunks that are empty now. Lola’s, Joel’s, Cassian’s, Sean’s, Isaiah’s, Blayne’s, and now hers. The only bunks that are still occupied are Michael’s and Nira’s, but she never really saw them as part of her team to begin with.

She starts to think about how in the fuck this happened. How one of the strongest teams in Nova just...fell apart. How maybe she could have prevented it. It all started with Lola. Lola just up and left in the middle of the night. She didn’t care what happened to her. She didn’t care what happened to her team. And then after being captured and rescued she goes off and joins New York. Just like that. After all L.A did for her. Not even a goodbye. Not. Even. A. Fucking. Goodbye.

Then Evgeni died. Just the thought of him was enough to bring Liam to tears. He was really the heart of the team. Somehow that crazy little Russian was the one who was holding everyone together. After he died the spirit of the team changed. That was when Liam started spending most of her nights in the Ravens’ cabin, because it was too painful for her to sleep in her own bunk.

She blames herself for the fall of L.A too. She thought maybe if she had stayed in the cabin more it could have kept the team together. Maybe if she had spent more time with them or gotten to know Cassian a little better, it would have helped.

Sean losing his soul was the final nail in the coffin. Without his passion the team crumbled. There were no more classic Sean speeches. No marching towards combat yelling “Die with your boots on”. No more goofing off during dinner. He would just sit there and stare at the fire. He was gone. L.A was gone. And then he just left. He packed up his stuff and took off in the middle of the night. Again, no goodbye. Once he was gone that was it. L.A lost their Lieutenant, and Liam lost another one of her best friends. Even if Isaiah and Blayne did find him and manage to bring him back, what’s done is done. They’re broken and not even Liam’s superglue can fix them.

She takes one final look around the room to make sure she didn’t forget anything. She’s not planning on setting foot in there ever again. She walks out and closes the door behind her. She drops her stuff on the porch and begins to take down the flag hanging on the front of the cabin. She folds it up and sticks it under her left arm, then picks up the rest of her stuff and heads toward her new cabin.

#LiamLA #OutpostLA #guessimaravennow #L