i pick me up

Come in Threes | Jar of Scribbles | U See I See

[vitafeed]

[chibird]

[wordsnquotes]

My past has not defined me, destroyed me, deterred me, or defeated me; it has only strengthened me.

Steve Maraboli  (via wordsnquotes)

[cyborgpotatogifs]

4 Psychological Terms That You're Using Incorrectly

[intj-confessions]

Common use like this really makes it hard when someone DOES have a problem. There’s a stigma and assumptions attached.

[imperialdalek-blog]

Having OCD is really hard because you’re like “I have OCD” and people say “yeah I do too” and it’s just “no I have OCD.”

[wordsnquotes]

The first and final thing you have to do in this world is to last it and not be smashed by it.

Ernest Hemingway (via wordsnquotes)

[my-teen-quote]

[wordsnquotes]

”Just because you don’t say much doesn’t mean people don’t notice you. It’s actually the quiet ones who often draw the most attention. There’s this constant whirlwind of motion and sound all around, and then there’s the quiet one, the eye of the storm.”

Amy Efaw, After (via wordsnquotes)

[krylessthanthree-blog]

lacigreen speaks about sexual objectification.

I agree with lacigreen that the products of the media, marketing and entertainment industries play a large role in normalising sexual objectification. I also believe that raising awareness and making conscious efforts to break this status quo are valid points.

However, I wish that there was more discussion on sexual objectification of MEN as well. It is not only women’s magazines that show women with the “ideal” body type. We see plenty of ads, music videos, etc of buff men that supposedly make all the ladies swoon.

Addressing sexual objectification and gender equality is a two-way street. It should not only be about giving women more, but also be about removing ridiculous standards that are singly applied to just women or just men. I feel that too often gender equality and feminism arguments are too one-sided in only highlighting the issues faced by women and overlook the difficulties experienced by men. Consider this: A man is more assertive in a relationship or workplace. In most instances he is considered to be strong or to have good leadership skills, and for everyone else that follows his lead that is normal and acceptable behaviour. Now, consider a woman in this position: she is considered bossy/demanding/a bitch while the men that listen to her are considered “whipped”. Often arguments focus on the (mis-)treatment of the woman and disregard the accompanying unfair treatment of men.

TL;DR: I strongly believe that gender equality should not just be about trying to put women in the proverbial driver seat, but to also make it acceptable for men to take the backseat without being ridiculed.

[iamprogress]

[animalsnaps]

[ipickmeup]

maybe i should make one of these too...

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

Understanding a Shame-Based Personality

There is a difference between blaming and shaming a person. Blaming is being told you did something wrong. Shaming is being told that there’s something wrong with you, and you’re worthless, bad, inferior or inadequate. Examples of shaming statements include:

· “You were a mistake; I wish I’d never had you”

· “You’re useless; you’ll never amount to anything.”

· “You could never do what he/she does”

· “You’ve ruined my life; you ruin everything for everyone”

Adults shamed in childhood have the following traits:

1. They are afraid to share their true thoughts and feelings with others.

2. They are terrified of intimacy and put up walls in relationships. They also fear commitment as they expect to be rejected.

3. They are often extremely shy, easily embarrassed, and are terrified of being shamed or humiliated. They tend to suffer from debilitating false guilt.

4. They struggle with feelings of worthlessness and believe they are inferior to others. They believe that is something they can never change as worthlessness is at the core of who they are.

5. They often feel ugly and flawed, even when they’re beautiful – and everyone tells them that.

6. They may be narcissistic and act as if they have it all together; alternatively, they may be completely selfless, almost to the point of being a doormat.

7. They are often very defensive and find it hard to bear the slightest criticism. They feel as if they are being constantly watched and judged.

8.  They have a pervasive sense of loneliness and always feel like outsiders (even when others genuinely like and love them).

9. They feel controlled – as if they always have to do want others want and say – and this blocks spontaneity.

10. They are perfectionists and usually suffer from performance anxiety. This may also cause them to be procrastinators.

11. They tend to block their feelings through compulsive behaviors like eating disorders, retail therapy or substance-abuse.

12. They find it hard to establish and enforce healthy boundaries with others.  

[ipickmeup]

I'm crossing things off this list. Things that I have overcome and no longer apply to me.

[betype]

[quoteinspirational]

[ipickmeup]

Person 1: I am really upset and feeling overwhelmed.

Person 2: You're being weak-minded. It will pass.

Person 1: I feel nauseous and keep wretching. I just want it to end. I really don't feel very good.

Person 2: Stop being such a drama queen and attention seeking whore.

Person 1: Shut up. Please stop. Someone please make this stop. I want to call him.

Person 2: If you call, it will just sound like you are creating a scene just to get the attention and ruining his plans. That will just make him angry.

Person 1: I'm not trying to make him angry or seek attention. I just want someone I trust to make this stop. Please go away.

Person 2: Remember that article you read about emotional manipulators and over-dependent people? You are one of them.

Person 1: It will pass. It will pass. It will go away. Don't listen.

Person 2: You speak of removing toxic people from your life but you are a toxic person. People should remove you from their lives.

Person 1: I'm trying to get better. I'm really really trying. Please just stop.

Person 2: You failed.

Person 1: He was so excited and had been waiting so long for it. I disappointed him. Nothing went to plan. I broke down. I said things without thinking about it.

Person 2: Exactly. You disappointed him. You made him feel like he wasted time and money on an unworthy experience.

Person 1: I can explain it. I can explain what I am thinking. I'm calming down now.

Person 2: Do you really think he will listen? No matter what you say, if you ask to speak with him it's just going to sound like you are forcing yourself into his evening.

Person 1: But if I don't explain it while my mind is clear enough to articulate it, then the next time this happens it will just keep building the misunderstanding.

Person 2: Even if he is willing to listen, it's just going to sound like excuses for your own selfish and unreasonable behaviour anyway. It's going to seem like emotional manipulation.

Person 1: I'm not trying to manipulate. I am trying to articulate what happens when I'm caught in a downward spiral. He can ask questions and I will answer them.

Person 2: He's just going to listen and say "alright" and that's it because no matter what you say, you're just being a weak-minded and selfish bitch. Someone like you doesn't deserve someone to believe you.

Person 1: SHUT UP. I am in control. Don't talk to me like that.

Person 2: Whatever. It's not going to work anyway,

Person 1: I will try to explain because that's being able to articulate my thoughts and share it with others is my responsibility. If I am unable to do this then no one knows what goes on inside my head and no one can help me.

Person 1 is weak, guilty, submissive and damaged. Person 2 is aggressive, unforgiving, skeptical and untrusting. Both people are me.:

[alwaysbewoke]

[nomellamesfriki]

[ipickmeup]

I want a kotatsu. When I have my own place, I’m definitely gonna have/make one. Then if someone ever tells me to think of a happy place, I can just think about my wonderful kotatsu. :3 Edit: In fact, I have a number of boardgames at home and I feel like I am missing two crucial elements: players and a kotatsu.