Iron Joe

He/Him, point those out if you stink. Avatar by @sirdusterbuster.bsky.social. Wario's pretty cool, and so's Bug Fables. Octodad/Jimmy Neutron/Lambdadelta main.

[ruins75]

[pocketdogs]

a customer returned a drink because a fly flew into it and said: “one of your flies flew into my drink” and my coworker was so confused that they just said: “…my fly?”

[moth-moth-the-magic-moth]

#MyFly

[tpwrtrmnky]

humans should be able to do a special Ultra Sleep after major life accomplishments where you're just out for like 32 hours or something and then you wake up fully refreshed in every way

[tpwrtrmnky]

Idk what kind of sleep marathons you're all having in the notes but when I sleep for 12+ hours I feel like shit afterwards.

[tpwrtrmnky]

it's been months and I'm still baffled by how this one-sentence post keeps getting so many responses that go "this exists except without the last part of the sentence"

[mapswithoutwyoming]

there should be a tumblr without piss poor reading comprehension

[tpwrtrmnky]

we already have that except with piss poor reading comprehension, which i assume is like an extraneous detail rather than a major part of the point you're making

[mariaxolot]

Could be better

[iron-joe]

Banjo & Kazooie are just the straight Sam & Max

[amazoogle]

had a dream that i brought a used paper towel roll back to the store to pay for it again because it was so useful. cashier was like "most people don't do this. you're a good person" true

[my-dailydreams]

[unofficial-autism-post]

Unofficial Autism Post

[nociceptrix]

How goated it is to be anything at all

[byjove]

things not to say when someone tells you they’re having a baby, from a transgender autistic guy named Algernon who has experienced a lot of trial and error:

Why? I know this is the question you want to ask. You are not allowed to ask it. I’m not sure why it’s frowned upon but you can’t.

You should name it after me. Not funny. No one laughs. A selfish statement that takes the attention off the pregnant party and shifts it to you. This joke is a flop, save it for the next pet they get.

Is it mine? It’s not mine. I have no testicles. If there is a possibility it is yours, they’ll tell you. Probably. No one wants an interrogation in this moment.

[iron-joe]

it’s funny when people get super antsy about a ship not having sufficient canonical backing and it’s like Sora and Riku or something. I can ship Axel and Goofy if I want, mind your business

[feminist-space]

[feminist-space]

[byjove]

When the average heterosexual family man complains about his family not respecting him, it is almost always because there is absolutely nothing about him to respect and he has made no effort to connect with any of them and he considers the slightest pushback or lack of affection a sign of ‘disrespect’. When the average heterosexual family woman complains about her family not respecting her, it’s usually because her 14 year old son keeps calling her a bitch and throwing things at her while her husband laughs. The difference is so fucking stark.

[bingutop]

You are trapped in an elevator with the person on your lockscreen. Who is it?

Reblog with who you get stuck with~

[algae122]

my fuckin cat

[drudg30n]

THE SUN

[do-not-u-dare]

CONAN GRAY

FUCK YEAH

[notthesodaa]

carrie white but in the pigs blood scene. so i’m dead

[public-transit]

ursula k. le guin my fucking goat

[iron-joe]

Raidou would fix it but I’d have no idea how

[f-g-p]

Two of a Kind

[evilwizard]

getting my little goblin minions to punch and stab me in the middle of the grocery store to try and whittle me down to half health so i can assume my final boss form and reach the top shelf

[evilwizard]

i don’t trust them with that power…

[prokopetz]

You let your minions stack on each other's shoulders to reach high shelves, the next thing you know they're solving complicated logic puzzles involving the coordinated use of their idiosyncratic personal weapons and learning important lessons about teamwork under pressure, and we all know where that ends.

[janmisali]

but like literally why did they call it Super Mario Bros. Wonder – Nintendo Switch 2 Edition + Meetup in Bellabel Park. what was the thought process behind that title

[janmisali]

"Nintendo Switch 2 Edition +" titles are so bad across the board. it's a type of title that says "we do not care how people refer to this game out loud". here's a sequence of words that you will only say if you're either being paid by nintendo or making fun of the title

[fluxxdog]

Like, I get your point. I want to add you forget about one of Nintendo's core markets:

Pedantics

The same ones who'll argue to death how wrong you are because of some obscure tidbit that links the Star Fox universe to The Legend of Zelda.

And yes, this is made in jest.

[janmisali]

what is this responding to

[tpwrtrmnky]

I do think "literally zero evidence indicates that gatekeeping medical transition does anything to prevent regret, but the harm done by gatekeeping is extensively documented" is a much stronger argument than "regret isn't real" cause there's always going to be some anecdote that puts you in a weak-looking rhetorical position for the latter, but the former is pretty unassailable.