Hell yeah

If you think this blog is not just a big meme we're going to have a big problem. I definitely take requests if you have something you'd like done. bg credit

[ironiczodiac]

Oh man so with all the new messages I get to see a bunch of messages I didn’t know were even there (thanks tumblr mobile) so uhhhhhhh SORRY

if you sent a message ages ago I either a) just saw it now or b) some of them don’t actually have messages in them so are either not real or were deleted but either way, so sorry

[ironiczodiac]

Anyone have anything they need to talk about? I’m feelin like talking someone through their issues on this night where everyone seems like they’re a lil down

hmu if you need anything

[ironiczodiac]

signs as pet spam blogs followin me on tundmblr dot com

Aries: only pugs allowed. also this one posted “yes this is dog” 

Taurus: none of this 50% Cat Lover Shit here. only 100% will do

Gemini: Ayyyy its The Big D—oh hi mom uhhhhhhhhh D-Dog Lover

Cancer: Underachiever. 5/10 for humor and the horror movie advertisements

Leo: no human friends to be seen

Virgo: short n sweet

Libra: for when you love ur cat but also love that w33d bro

Scorpio: More dog lovin, but from the sixties and also probably just as h1gh

Sagittarius: really wholesome but also idk if they’re a fan of dogs or dog lovers

Capricorn: who are you trying to convince

Aquarius: they aren’t just a dog lover, they’re the captain of the dog universe

Pisces: y to the iff

[ironiczodiac]

shoutout to the guy who has been faithfully leavin cryptic messages in my inbox for going on two years now!!! anyway no I’m not dead you are

[ironiczodiac]

Years the signs should fucking fight

Aries: 2016

Taurus: 2016

Gemini: 2016

Cancer: 2016

Leo: 2017 (they're not optimistic)

Virgo: 2016

Libra: 2016

Scorpio: 2016

Sagittarius: 2016

Capricorn: 1916

Aquarius: 2016

Pisces: 2016

[ironiczodiac]

u coo. u coo.

oh no, you got me, I’m a pigeon

u too bro ♥︎

[ironiczodiac]

Are aquas and leos good

Some aquas and leos are good, but some get drawn in by the dark side of the force or the power of money or, worst of all, politics

[ironiczodiac]

If I was born on May 20th am I a cusp for Taurus and Gemini

You certainly are! Thanks for the easy q

[ironiczodiac]

I'm a Gemini girl and my boyfriend's a Scorpio, ARE THERE ANY GOOD THINGS AT ALL ABOUT THIS PAIRING because I spent the afternoon googling horoscope stuff and apparently we're doomed to misery😂😂

YOU’RE DOOMED. Nah, good things? 

- both signs are determined and passionate about things they love

- both signs love discussion and banter, so there’s always stuff to talk about

- both signs are friendly and glamorous, so you’re a power couple

- both signs adore intellectual talk and problem-solving. go to a maze or escape the room game, you’ll have a blast

- you’d make a good political spin team

- you’d probably make a very formidable kayaking crew

[ironiczodiac]

I'm a Sagittarius. What is the best pairing? You don't have to answer.

That’s so nice of you to say, aha. All the Sagis in my life have benefited most from Gemini or Libra influence, but feel free to disagree. 

[ironiczodiac]

What exactly is a cusp?

If you’re a cusp, it means your birthday is close to the day one sign ends and the other begins. For example, if you were born on, like, december 21st, you’re a Saggitarius/Capricorn cusp. Theoretically, it means cusps are more likely to have traits from both signs than those born in the middle of a sign.  

[ironiczodiac]

Everything you know about a Taurus female? (like traits and personality and all that jazz) 😊😊😊

Taurus females are the “doesn’t forgive, doesn’t forget” type, tbh. They may give the exterior impression that they forgive you, but underneath they seethe until the end of time. That person that gave them the wrong coffee order two years ago? Still on their shit list. They’re caring and warm, they love stability, and need personal relationships above all else. If something goes awry in a personal relationship, their whole world comes crashing down. It won’t go down easily. They can’t thrive in variable, unstable environments. They tend to be animal or plant lovers, and don’t want to do work that’s not nurturing in some way. They’re selfish to an extent, wanting praise and recognition for their efforts and constant communication, though they may be hard to read and DEFINITELY won’t tell you if something’s wrong until it's really bad. They’re definitely a people person, and can make others feel better easily. Just, really, don’t get on their bad side.

[ironiczodiac]

Libra Scorpio cusp (f) and Gemini Cancer cusp (m)? Do you think it would work? Why or why not? (If you even answer cusp questions I mean idk...)

👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my selｆ 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

Legit so good though y’all know I love gemini/libra and scorpio/cancer cusps mean that there’s a lot of emotional ties so that’s a+

[ironiczodiac]

I'm a Pisces born on March 14 so I'm not a cusp but how come I act and think more like an Aries?

I mean, you’re less than a week from being a cusp

you’re a cusp cusp

[ironiczodiac]

What are the best qualities about an Aries baby?

An aries baby or an aries, baby? Aries babies are exactly like every other baby

babies cry a lot and make strange noises

[ironiczodiac]

I'm all for the Libra love but also the Libra that I spend the most time with is my sister who is basically the most inverted version of their sign I've ever met in as a Pisces everytime I see someone suggest that a Libra is good for anyone my first thought is someone trying to deal with my sister's shit and I'm like "For the Love of all that is Holy, no, don't do it, save yourself, run for your life!!!!!" Watch out for those inverted signs, peeps.

[ironiczodiac]

umm scorp (f) hereeee soz, cap aries or virgo— which one suits best or like the best pairing. aries is a good friend, cap is too but the fuckboy type, and the virgo well he's just noisy. and irritating but he's cuTe

The Cap is the fuckboy omg this is the best ask

The aries and the scorpio seem like the adventurous power couple so I think that’d be the most fun. Don’t date a fuckboi, child