@itmstyrose - Tumblr Blog

“Honestly cognitive behavioral therapy is the best thing ever and they should check it out. It’s not easy, since you’re literally training your brain to change its knee-jerk reactions. But it is worth it. If your job is giving you anxiety? Get a different job. If your family is making you feel panicked? Choose a new accepting family. The things in life that do not allow you to grow are not as important as they claim to be.”

— Mental Illness Recovery Book (via awake-society)

introspectivepoet

Honestly, my goal is to build a life, and career, where I’m not constantly waiting for the weekend. I don’t want to live that way, where I hate five days of the week because I hate my life and job so much, that the only relief I get is Saturday and Sunday. I want to enjoy my life, and not wish it away every week. I want each day to matter to me, in some way, even some small way. I want to like my life, all of it, not just my life on the weekend.

yung-smoov

stxrb0y

WHEN IS HER ALBUM DROPPING THO

skinny-pizza

“Take some advice from a girl who’s been through it too… 1.) Trust me, it will get easier. I know right now you’re choking back your tears and trying not to cry in the middle of class but whether it takes you a week or 3 years. Everything will get easier. 2.) Hang out with your friends. Don’t sit at home and let your thoughts take over, go out. Go get drunk and party all night. Or simply just watch a movie and eat some popcorn. Do something so your thoughts don’t take over, because I know right now they aren’t the best. 3.) Don’t cry alone. When it’s 3 a.m. and you’re laying all alone in your bed sobbing into your pillow, go in your moms room. She understands what you’re going through, let her help you. 4.) Cry as much as you need to. Whether it be in your car or in the bathroom at school during lunch. Cry, seriously. Crying is one of the best things you can do right now. 5.) Kiss as many boys as it takes to take the taste of his lips off of yours. 6.) Talk to someone. It can be anyone. Your best friend, mom, dad, grandma. Anyone. They won’t get annoyed, as a matter of fact they will probably feel so good you came to them for advice. 7.) Get some sleep. I know right now he’s taking up your dreams and you don’t want to fall asleep because you will see his green eyes again. But you need sleep, love. Go to sleep. 8.) You aren’t alone. You have people who love you, trust me. 9.) Don’t forget to eat. I know you aren’t hungry and I realize that you feel like you can’t go on but drink a cup of water and eat a sandwich. It will make you feel better. 10.) Just because he left doesn’t mean you’re worthless. You are beautiful, kind, and caring. You will find someone else, and I know first hand you think that you won’t. But someone will come into your life and pick up all the pieces he left scattered and glue them back together. You just have to be patient.”

— Things I wish I was told after my heart was broke

fromthedeskofmyheart

Dear Best Friend,

Week One - A Letter to your Best Friend

Dear Best Friend, I want you to know, first and foremost, that I love you. I know that you know because I tell you on basically a daily basis. But it’s not out of habit that I tell you, it’s not because I feel like I have to, but it’s to remind you. Remind you that you are so important to me. Most people, especially girls, say that their significant other is the best thing that ever happened to them. But, for me, that’s not true. For me, the best thing that ever happened to me is you. And that will always be true from the honeymoon phase to the actual honeymoon to my 25th wedding anniversary, he will never quite be on par with you. You were there before him, during him, and should there ever be an after him - you’ll still be there. You were the one I gushed to over every step of the relationship. You’re it for me. When something happens in my life, the first thing that I want to do is pick up the phone and tell you. It doesn’t even matter what that thing is. I will never be able to repay you for the countless hours you have spent listening to cry and complain and vent, for the bellyaches from laughter, for taking 3785 photos with me, and always snapping me back. I can never thank you enough for all the tears you’ve dried or caught on your shoulder, for all the times you made me laugh through good times and bad, and for just being there. Being friends with me is not an easy task. I have a past that haunts me every single day, a past that has left me bruised, broken, and damaged. I can be loud and obnoxious and annoying. I can wear my emotions on my sleeve too much, or hold them down and hide them away. I can be needy, but I can always go days just needing space. I make mistakes - pretty big ones - and I’m not perfect. I am insecure, and that requires you to have to constantly remind me that you aren’t going anywhere. I am sorry that you are paying for the previous best friends, the ones who promised to never leave - and then left. Granted it was me who pushed them away, and that’s also something I grapple with every day. I have had friends get me attached and then just stop talking to me - and I am scared every single day that you are going to do that, too. It’s not fair - that I make you pay for their actions. I know. It’s not easy or fun being friends with someone who battles Depression and Anxiety, I know it’s not. There are nights that are too dark, and it’s everything I can do to make it until the morning. But you are always my morning. You are always my rainbow after the storm. You don’t judge me for my music taste, or my weird habits, or the weird things I tend to eat. You don’t judge me for the craziness, or my random singing, or the fact that I’m a complete mess.

Here’s the truth: I would be dead if it weren’t for you. I have been no stranger to thoughts that try to kill me, to feelings that persuade me to take my life and ideations that try to convince me that it wouldn’t make a difference. Insecurity and Depression wrap me up tight, whispering in my ear that no one would really be too affected, everyone would be okay. There may be tears, but everyone would move on easily. You come in, like a damn knight, and battle my demons for me. You remind me that, no, you would not be okay. And several others would not be okay. It would not be okay. “You promised me you would never hurt me, and losing you would completely shatter my heart, it’d break me.” You say, as many times as I need to hear it. You help me battle my demons, and that’s not easy. It’s annoying and frustrating and emotional and overwhelming, I know. I’m sorry. I love you.

I hope you know what fucking National Treasure you are. You draw people in until they feel like they have known you forever. You have taught me that asking for a hug is not a sign of weakness and asking for help is not a sign of failure. You have touched countless hearts. Your spirit in contagious and your laugh is infectious. Your heart is gold, and so many people love you. You’re probably the best person I’ve ever met in my life. You have a kind soul, an old soul, and a loving one.

Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for saving me. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being my friend. You mean more to me than you will ever, ever know.

inkskinned

“1. Who you are now is not who you will be in 10 years. It is okay to be somebody new 10 minutes from now. We are always learning. We are always growing. If you realized 10 seconds ago that you don’t like who you are, shed your skin, retry, replant yourself in good soil. 2. Cleaning is instant therapy. When your brain is muddy, take a shower, wash your hands, change your clothes. Spend 15 minutes straightening your living room. When you are angry, scrub things. I know it’s crazy but it works instantly. 3. Forgive someone’s debt if it’s under 50 dollars, forgive the small things, give a little time to yourself and forgive the big things too. Forgiveness isn’t about the other person, it’s about you. That being said - if someone ever hurts you in a way that would make me cry to know, you get out of there, my love. You just get up and go. 4. Gum karma is real and if you spit out a piece in public expect to find some on your shoe in the future. Same goes for insults and harsh judgement, too. 5. Do what you love and the money will follow. 6. Live your life with an open palm and give as much as you can and as often. At some point in your life, someone will lend you 50 bucks when you’re down on your luck. Remember how that feels. Remember to give that back. 7. Always wear clean underwear. You’ll thank me later. 8. There is a difference between being kind and being passive and there are those who cannot see that difference. They will try to walk all over you. Never bend your knees for those who do. 9. Have faith. Have faith in god or people or yourself or science or in luck or in all of the above. Faith is what keeps us going, faith is what keeps us strong. 10. Pay your bills on time whenever you can, although money is nothing. Remind yourself that. 11. Do not forget you were once ignorant of all you know now. Be patient of anyone who hasn’t had the education you have. Speak at the level of the person you are with - it’s not playing dumb, it’s being considerate. There’s no reason to make them feel uncomfortable. Plus then when someone starts going off about their superior IQ, you can cut them to pieces and watch their face when you do. 12. You are the best person in the room for one particular thing, and that’s confidence. You are the worst person in the room for another thing, and that’s humility. Use both carefully. 13. Never make fun of someone’s beliefs or superstitions, let your kid keep their imaginary friend and let your best buddy believe in knocking on wood. We all have security blankets. Don’t take away someone else’s. 14. Try to learn something new every day. 15. The worse you look, the more likely you are to run into someone you know so instead of feeling awkward, learn to be confident in sweats while talking to your friends. 16. Never go to bed angry, it will ruin your sleep and make tomorrow even harder. Find a way to relax. Don’t let today get to your head. 17. Think before you speak. When someone says something, mull over their words before answering. This is called listening, it is different than hearing. 18. What keeps love beautiful is that there’s risk involved. If he breaks your heart and it doesn’t hurt, it wasn’t love in the first place. 19. Never let someone else determine who you are or how happy. You are too strong to be torn apart. 20. I love you, even when we are fighting, even when I am fast asleep. Don’t doubt it for an instant. You are my everything.”

— Life lessons my mother has taught me from the side of her hospital bed (part 2/2 of a series) /// r.i.d

a-disciplined-life

Four rules for a disciplined life

(Credit to reddit user ryans01).

No zero days. ‘What’s a zero day? A zero day is when you don’t do a single fucking thing towards whatever dream or goal or want or whatever that you got going on. No more zeros. I’m not saying you gotta bust an essay out everyday, that’s not the point. The point I’m trying to make is that you have to make yourself, promise yourself, that the new SYSTEM you live in is a NON-ZERO system. Didn’t do anything all fucking day and it’s 11:58 PM? Write one sentence. One pushup. Read one page of that chapter. One. Because one is non zero.’

Be grateful to the three yous. ‘There’s the past you, the present you, and the future you. If you wanna love someone and have someone love you back, you gotta learn to love yourself, and the 3 you’s are the key. Be GRATEFUL to the past you for the positive things you’ve done. And do favours for the future you like you would for your best bro.’

Forgive yourself. ‘Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do. But lets say you still didn’t do it. Now you’re giving yourself shit for not doing what you need to, to be who you want to. Heads up champion, being disappointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? So what. I forgive you, previous self. I forgive you. But today? Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. This one’s for you, future homes. Forgiveness man, use it. I forgive you. Say it out loud.’

Exercise and books. ‘Pretty standard advice but when you exercise daily you actually get smarter. When you exercise you get high from endorphins (thanks body). When you exercise you clear your mind. When you exercise you are doing your future self a huge favour. Exercise is a leg on a three legged stool. Feel me? As for books, almost every fucking thing we’ve all ever thought of, or felt, or gone through, or wanted, or wanted to know how to do, or whatever, has been figured out by someone else. Get some books.’