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@its-my-time-dear
Why didn’t I have a pinned post before now? Because I’m lazy and forgetful that’s why. Anyway
Hiya everyone. Call me mice. They/them. I’m 21 and studying at university currently. Criminology. And I love art and creativity and have vague and undefined dreams about being an author but that’s probably never going to happen. Hope yall have a good morning/afternoon/evening/night and keep creating
My ao3 if anyone’s interested
https://archiveofourown.org/users/Empty_Mice/profile
Hey guys. Imagine if Steve Rodgers, Kraven the Hunter, Pietro Maximoff, and Johnny Blaze met 4th wall style?
Because that’s just Ryland Grace meeting different versions of his brothers ops with no context
Musk just something to think about, those 3 actors being in the MCU
Ok yall hear me out.
RGCU but Aladdin. Walk with me here.
Ryland as jasmine
Colt as the sultan
Tom as jafar
Driver as Aladdin
Rocky as either the genie or Abu or even rajah
Does anyone else see the vision? Tell me on not crazy here
Is Court Aladdins dad? (Can’t remember his name off the top of my head) MAYBE. But the idea of the song king of the 40 thieves (or whatever it’s called. I have a shit memory evidently) being sung to Driver about Courtland is a hilarious visual to me
Reblog this to ease the back pain of the person you reblogged it from
I wish your spine well in these trying times
Ok yall hear me out.
RGCU but Aladdin. Walk with me here.
Ryland as jasmine
Colt as the sultan
Tom as jafar
Driver as Aladdin
Rocky as either the genie or Abu or even rajah
Does anyone else see the vision? Tell me on not crazy here
Ok so with the new gosling announcement with Ghost Rider I feel it is important for people to know that both Ghost Rider and Harley Quinn have the same origins. They both originally stemmed from the Scandinavian Wild Hunt and Odin. And since they have the same origin I just feel the need to remind people that we still have Barbie and Ken. And idk how to feel about it
all these roleplay blogs cropping up makes me wanna start one but i...think there's too many for me to bother. the last thing i need is another dead blog to shove in the mausoleum, but then again, i've only seen ones for Grace/Simon/Rocky. maybe another Gosling boy needs one?
Which Goose would you wanna send asks to
Lars Lindstrom
Colt Seavers
Luke Glanton
Other (Tell me!)
Results
(there are a few i won't touch with a ten foot pole but not many, feel free to make suggestions!)
If it should please you, Courtland Gentry would be nice. He gets mischaracterised a lot
see if i was smart i'd outline a fic and go from that to actually, y'know, get it written. but instead i just open my brain and dump out whatever it gives me and hope it's coherent
maybe that's why i never finish things
and the funny thing is, i have a painstaking outline for a 24 chapter crossover fic! i spent WEEKS making that outline!
it's been sitting in wip hell for over a year with no sign of ever being finished, i have finished two or three fics in that time with no outline and nothing but spite and exhaustion to fuel them. why am i like this
Hey see. Now I’m incredibly curious. What’s the crossover, casisashadow. What it is
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
okay i wasn't on board with Starstruck at first because I wanna hit Tom with a brick for what he did to Colt, HOWEVER, you made me cry about it so-
Ryland and Tom get the closure they both needed and they actually wind up becoming friends again thanks to the communication system, it's less awkward than either of them expected it to be and they're both happier for it. Ry feels...bittersweet about being able to keep in contact with all of them, his batshit crazy family included, because the Eridians are absolutely extending his lifespan through some kind of science magic human kibble (ha) and he's getting the pleasurepain of watching them all age;
Colt and Jody have a baby, and he gets to see his twin going grey while their kid grows up through photos and video calls (how advanced is this communication system? who knows, let's pretend it's near-instant back and forth) and Ryland breaks down because the kid wants to be an astronaut like 'uncle Ry' and he absolutely will not tell the kid how much he didn't wanna be an astronaut. what is he, a dream crusher? psh.
Tom and weird cousin Ken are actually surprisingly cute together and he's glad Tom has someone that makes him happy now that he's doing better! Ken gets so excited to talk about his "job" and tries really hard to compare it to Beach--Ryland quietly wonders if maybe Ken got hit on the head a few times but he's happy his cousin and his ex are happy, so he doesn't linger on it too much when they do get to talk.
aaand since i have permanent Bloodymary brain worms i have to include Simon in this-
All in all Ryland is happy about how things are going, but on a day where he's scheduled to call or email Earth he just...doesn't. It takes a few days for an update and Ryland is panicking when he does send out a message, but when he does get the video message sent the entire family is absolutely shocked to see what looks like fucking Markiplier with one arm lingering in the doorway behind him. covered in bandages from neck to waist pretty much, looking wary and suspicious, and the brothers back on Earth are immediately on Big Brother Mode because who is this big angry lump behind you??? where did he come from?? and Ryland has to explain that this dude popped up in a blood-filled submarine in his little chunk of Eridian-made ocean and wowee isn't it cool that he's alive? completely brushing over the teeth on his face and the fact that he's more scar tissue than person ofc.
i think Simon would get along with most of the family honestly, he'd be a little wary of a few of them (Ken in particular, Simon can tell that he's not quite human even through a video and it freaks him out on a primal level. Ken is blissfully unaware.) but over time they all just...become a big interstellar family.
(side note, everyone is surprised when the people Simon ends up getting along with the best are uncle Holland's husband Jackson and Lars's partner Casey. they're quiet and a little broody and they just Get Each Other.)
I fear this may be getting out of hand I feel the itching urge to turn it into an actual fanfic. But I already have like 5 wips and idk if I have the mental fortitude to turn it into a full story.
But
But
But. Imagine. Somehow. Grace manages to get to Earth before they all die if old age and Grace finally gets to meet all his nieces and nephews and the rest of his extended family. I hadn’t even considered pairing Tom with Ken (starbeach? Stardoll? Who knows. New crack ship unlocked and I’ll cry about it when I’m not on a fucking train) but it oddly works. Haven’t watched nice guys yet but I gather from things that, yeah, Jackson is rather similar to probably either court or Casey (driver)
And then the eridians discover new dimensions through Simon as the quiet rapture would be impossible in phm and then they somehow meet Officer K (Blade Runner 2049 (which I also agent watched yet)) and this poor man is just. So confused and like. It’s a cyberpunk future from what I can tell and that poor man is so sad and pathetic and has no idea who these people are and- I might have to stop with spreading the rgcu.
But also throw in the markiplier egos if you wish like. Simon being able to tell Ken isn’t completely human because he reminds him of the vague impression of a weird pink man with a moustache who definitely wasn’t real but might have been and one day Simon asks if Ken knows anyone like that? And Ken goes silent, which, weird, he never shuts up. And drops the bomb that discodoll was canon but somehow, after a massive fight, Wilford willed it out of existence. But. Ken remembers. Because it happened in Barbie land. And then he comes clean that it’s pure coincidence that he looks like them because he’s not a distant cousin. He’s a living doll. And he too will never age. And they never noticed that he doesn’t look as old as the rest of them. And. And they are so confused and the realisation that other worlds exist kind of breaks all of their brains (eridians and Grace included but not Simon. He already knew) and then Tom gets really upset because by that point they’d been together for probably a number of decades and. I just seem to really like making Tom cry apparently.
I need to stop I think. Making myself cry on public transport is not the way
omg including the Egos would be fun, if i didn't have 15 wips staring down the barrel at me i would jump on this so fast!
Ken does feel a little bad for not telling everybody the truth right away but once everybody's over the shock maybe he can take 'em all on a vacation to Barbieland, Tom gets jealous of Barbie at first 'cause poor Ken still gets puppy eyes around her sometimes but then realizes she wants nothing to do with Ken in that way and he's like "girl you FUMBLED him look at this perfect specimen, your loss" and he gets all huffy and a little of his old personality starts creeping out but it doesn't get too bad. Tom's just a jealous kinda guy and that is HIS living doll tyvm.
which kinda circles me around to Lars bc let's say he goes on the family trip and he sees a Barbie with dark hair like Bianca, he goes a little pink around the ears and maybe he accidentally calls her Bianca instead of Barbie and some small part of him is gets a little closure from that. Barbie-Bianca thinks Lars is very sweet but she doesn't understand why he gets all misty-eyed looking at her alskdfj Casey is utterly unbothered and is way more interested in how the barbie cars drive without engines in them, no jealousy here, as long as his teddy bear is happy he's happy.
the Goose fam that didn't go on the trip is back home and meeting some of the Egos, K is now living in the same universe as the rest of the Goslings and he and Googleplier get along like a house on fire (after GP gets over the worst of his 'destroy all humans' mentality ofc) to everyone's surprise. Yancy and Court were cellmates at one time so they're chill and maybe even...cuddly...do i wanna ship Court and Yancy? maybe.
the possibilities with this HUGE crossover AU are limitless and i am absolutely going to be coming back to this post for fic ideas
Part of my emotion about it is that it’s a massive family. I have a massive family myself, excluding my half siblings families, I myself have 13 aunts and uncles and all of them have a t least 1 kid so I just have a massive family myself. But, unlike this one, mine is very splintered and split all over the country and some even live outside the uk.
But yeah. This is a massive au and 15 wips???? Are you ok?? I thought my 5ish was a lot lord help you
This is such a long thread and I will probably start something for it, whether my brain tells me it’s a good idea or not. Help us all wips are a special kind of hell
I’m also not all that familiar with marks egos, I was a jack kid personally but I’ve been slowly been working through marks work.
But also that thing with Barbie is hilarious. Tom somewhat reverting back to his old personality because he’s a jealous ass is funny as fuck. Colt definitely would’ve had to go to Barbieland to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. But also it’d be really funny to have the gosfam learn about the attempted patriarchy that Ken himself led and be mortified, Tom more at the outfit than the takeover specifically, and court fighting the urge to just deck him because that was a stupid move. Lars getting emotional about one of the Barbie’s looking like Bianca is just. So sad. And Casey just wanting him to be happy, that man doesn’t have a jealous bone in his body. Like at all. And that’s canon. He just wants his loved ones to be happy.
But I’ve also seen the idea that Ryan Gosling still exists. And have a personal headcanon for any media that takes place in any version of our realisty that the actors themselves still exist, because there’s so many unconscious references to media that it’d be impossible to tell what life would be like if certain actors never existed. Like yeah RyGos still exists and is a little perturbed by how many look alikes he has. Like. Help that poor man he’s going through a weird ass existential crisis several times over. So that bit about the gosfam seeing markiplier behind Ryland the first time is hilarious because mark fishbach (idk how to spell his last name) is definitely still a person and a very influential personality and it’s just really funny. Anyway
Help I’ve become attached and need to do something about it soon or I’ll combust. Help
to answer your question, no, i'm not alright, the brain worms are chewing on my frontal lobe like a gummy bear. i need to pare down the wips or i'm gonna go insane, i need to FINISH SOMETHING- but this thread is giving me so many ideas that the wip pile may yet grow larger. i'm in the trenches, send help
though the memes of Markiplier and the literal savior of earth being shipped would be so funny in-universe, i'm scared if i say his name too many times he's gonna appear but god can you imagine. it'd be like a super weird variant of bloodymary and it would be amazing
Calling gosplier a weird version of Bloodymary is hysterical imo. Like. They’re the originals but they are the weird ones. Ryan probably doesn’t even know who mark IS I love them
And yeah the wips are always out of control. It’s so wild to go from a wip with full world building and a developing magic system (good ol’ Minecraft. Hermitcraft specifically) to a fucking Dexter fix it fanfic where I ship Dexter with doakes. Help me. Of all my wips only one has an actual story laid out and the one that’s the longest currently (just started chapter 3 and currently just over 7,000 words. Help) is a make it up as I go thing. But it also has world building and a magic system but it’s so different to the Dexter wip I have and the mcyt wip and the other urban fantasy wip (that one being the one with a story structure already) and the murder mystery that’s still at less than 100 words.
Who knows tho. If the brainworms don’t leave us we may have to write it. Might help chug things along if you got someone working with you too
Hey so I had another idea.
What’s Eva’s reaction to the whole thing? Like. She’d have met Colt and court but how’d she react to everyone else?
That poor poor woman. Imagine her meeting Ken tho. There’s a whole nother dimensions humans can be living in that isn’t affected by the sun dying???? Let her see that. She’d explode I think
oh her brain would short circuit when she meets Ken and finds out that he's not actually human, and that Barbieland exists.
that woman would be so deep in shock that she wouldn't even notice the Barbies fawning over her. like she is mentally knee-deep in calculations for how many people they could reasonably shuttle there to keep them safe and the Barbies are trying to elect her to some office because she's a strong woman and they obviously value that, not that they know the lengths she went to to try and save Earth of course. if they knew they'd probably ask her to leave because *why* would she hurt so many people just to achieve her mission??
and then there's the whole situation of meeting all the Gosling relations in general, like- how horrible would she feel learning that not only did Ryland have family, but he left behind a BIG crazy family (and Ken) and she now has to live with that guilt on top of everything else she's done.
She’ll be seeing his face in both her nightmares and reality. Because Colt at least has a massive media presence. And every government odciął high ranked enough to know about the Sierra program would still be on a manhunt for court and Jacob finds himself in the weirdest of situations and every time she sees a doll she’s gonna think of barbieland and Ken.
And omg imagine the Barbie’s reaction to the bombing of Antarctica and the paving of the Sahara. They’d be horrified. Especially because KEN HIMSELF has done near irreparable damage to barbieland and he’d both hate and admire her for her willingness to save Earth but still having the will to do the incredibly damaging things she did to do it.
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
okay i wasn't on board with Starstruck at first because I wanna hit Tom with a brick for what he did to Colt, HOWEVER, you made me cry about it so-
Ryland and Tom get the closure they both needed and they actually wind up becoming friends again thanks to the communication system, it's less awkward than either of them expected it to be and they're both happier for it. Ry feels...bittersweet about being able to keep in contact with all of them, his batshit crazy family included, because the Eridians are absolutely extending his lifespan through some kind of science magic human kibble (ha) and he's getting the pleasurepain of watching them all age;
Colt and Jody have a baby, and he gets to see his twin going grey while their kid grows up through photos and video calls (how advanced is this communication system? who knows, let's pretend it's near-instant back and forth) and Ryland breaks down because the kid wants to be an astronaut like 'uncle Ry' and he absolutely will not tell the kid how much he didn't wanna be an astronaut. what is he, a dream crusher? psh.
Tom and weird cousin Ken are actually surprisingly cute together and he's glad Tom has someone that makes him happy now that he's doing better! Ken gets so excited to talk about his "job" and tries really hard to compare it to Beach--Ryland quietly wonders if maybe Ken got hit on the head a few times but he's happy his cousin and his ex are happy, so he doesn't linger on it too much when they do get to talk.
aaand since i have permanent Bloodymary brain worms i have to include Simon in this-
All in all Ryland is happy about how things are going, but on a day where he's scheduled to call or email Earth he just...doesn't. It takes a few days for an update and Ryland is panicking when he does send out a message, but when he does get the video message sent the entire family is absolutely shocked to see what looks like fucking Markiplier with one arm lingering in the doorway behind him. covered in bandages from neck to waist pretty much, looking wary and suspicious, and the brothers back on Earth are immediately on Big Brother Mode because who is this big angry lump behind you??? where did he come from?? and Ryland has to explain that this dude popped up in a blood-filled submarine in his little chunk of Eridian-made ocean and wowee isn't it cool that he's alive? completely brushing over the teeth on his face and the fact that he's more scar tissue than person ofc.
i think Simon would get along with most of the family honestly, he'd be a little wary of a few of them (Ken in particular, Simon can tell that he's not quite human even through a video and it freaks him out on a primal level. Ken is blissfully unaware.) but over time they all just...become a big interstellar family.
(side note, everyone is surprised when the people Simon ends up getting along with the best are uncle Holland's husband Jackson and Lars's partner Casey. they're quiet and a little broody and they just Get Each Other.)
I fear this may be getting out of hand I feel the itching urge to turn it into an actual fanfic. But I already have like 5 wips and idk if I have the mental fortitude to turn it into a full story.
But
But
But. Imagine. Somehow. Grace manages to get to Earth before they all die if old age and Grace finally gets to meet all his nieces and nephews and the rest of his extended family. I hadn’t even considered pairing Tom with Ken (starbeach? Stardoll? Who knows. New crack ship unlocked and I’ll cry about it when I’m not on a fucking train) but it oddly works. Haven’t watched nice guys yet but I gather from things that, yeah, Jackson is rather similar to probably either court or Casey (driver)
And then the eridians discover new dimensions through Simon as the quiet rapture would be impossible in phm and then they somehow meet Officer K (Blade Runner 2049 (which I also agent watched yet)) and this poor man is just. So confused and like. It’s a cyberpunk future from what I can tell and that poor man is so sad and pathetic and has no idea who these people are and- I might have to stop with spreading the rgcu.
But also throw in the markiplier egos if you wish like. Simon being able to tell Ken isn’t completely human because he reminds him of the vague impression of a weird pink man with a moustache who definitely wasn’t real but might have been and one day Simon asks if Ken knows anyone like that? And Ken goes silent, which, weird, he never shuts up. And drops the bomb that discodoll was canon but somehow, after a massive fight, Wilford willed it out of existence. But. Ken remembers. Because it happened in Barbie land. And then he comes clean that it’s pure coincidence that he looks like them because he’s not a distant cousin. He’s a living doll. And he too will never age. And they never noticed that he doesn’t look as old as the rest of them. And. And they are so confused and the realisation that other worlds exist kind of breaks all of their brains (eridians and Grace included but not Simon. He already knew) and then Tom gets really upset because by that point they’d been together for probably a number of decades and. I just seem to really like making Tom cry apparently.
I need to stop I think. Making myself cry on public transport is not the way
omg including the Egos would be fun, if i didn't have 15 wips staring down the barrel at me i would jump on this so fast!
Ken does feel a little bad for not telling everybody the truth right away but once everybody's over the shock maybe he can take 'em all on a vacation to Barbieland, Tom gets jealous of Barbie at first 'cause poor Ken still gets puppy eyes around her sometimes but then realizes she wants nothing to do with Ken in that way and he's like "girl you FUMBLED him look at this perfect specimen, your loss" and he gets all huffy and a little of his old personality starts creeping out but it doesn't get too bad. Tom's just a jealous kinda guy and that is HIS living doll tyvm.
which kinda circles me around to Lars bc let's say he goes on the family trip and he sees a Barbie with dark hair like Bianca, he goes a little pink around the ears and maybe he accidentally calls her Bianca instead of Barbie and some small part of him is gets a little closure from that. Barbie-Bianca thinks Lars is very sweet but she doesn't understand why he gets all misty-eyed looking at her alskdfj Casey is utterly unbothered and is way more interested in how the barbie cars drive without engines in them, no jealousy here, as long as his teddy bear is happy he's happy.
the Goose fam that didn't go on the trip is back home and meeting some of the Egos, K is now living in the same universe as the rest of the Goslings and he and Googleplier get along like a house on fire (after GP gets over the worst of his 'destroy all humans' mentality ofc) to everyone's surprise. Yancy and Court were cellmates at one time so they're chill and maybe even...cuddly...do i wanna ship Court and Yancy? maybe.
the possibilities with this HUGE crossover AU are limitless and i am absolutely going to be coming back to this post for fic ideas
Part of my emotion about it is that it’s a massive family. I have a massive family myself, excluding my half siblings families, I myself have 13 aunts and uncles and all of them have a t least 1 kid so I just have a massive family myself. But, unlike this one, mine is very splintered and split all over the country and some even live outside the uk.
But yeah. This is a massive au and 15 wips???? Are you ok?? I thought my 5ish was a lot lord help you
This is such a long thread and I will probably start something for it, whether my brain tells me it’s a good idea or not. Help us all wips are a special kind of hell
I’m also not all that familiar with marks egos, I was a jack kid personally but I’ve been slowly been working through marks work.
But also that thing with Barbie is hilarious. Tom somewhat reverting back to his old personality because he’s a jealous ass is funny as fuck. Colt definitely would’ve had to go to Barbieland to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. But also it’d be really funny to have the gosfam learn about the attempted patriarchy that Ken himself led and be mortified, Tom more at the outfit than the takeover specifically, and court fighting the urge to just deck him because that was a stupid move. Lars getting emotional about one of the Barbie’s looking like Bianca is just. So sad. And Casey just wanting him to be happy, that man doesn’t have a jealous bone in his body. Like at all. And that’s canon. He just wants his loved ones to be happy.
But I’ve also seen the idea that Ryan Gosling still exists. And have a personal headcanon for any media that takes place in any version of our realisty that the actors themselves still exist, because there’s so many unconscious references to media that it’d be impossible to tell what life would be like if certain actors never existed. Like yeah RyGos still exists and is a little perturbed by how many look alikes he has. Like. Help that poor man he’s going through a weird ass existential crisis several times over. So that bit about the gosfam seeing markiplier behind Ryland the first time is hilarious because mark fishbach (idk how to spell his last name) is definitely still a person and a very influential personality and it’s just really funny. Anyway
Help I’ve become attached and need to do something about it soon or I’ll combust. Help
to answer your question, no, i'm not alright, the brain worms are chewing on my frontal lobe like a gummy bear. i need to pare down the wips or i'm gonna go insane, i need to FINISH SOMETHING- but this thread is giving me so many ideas that the wip pile may yet grow larger. i'm in the trenches, send help
though the memes of Markiplier and the literal savior of earth being shipped would be so funny in-universe, i'm scared if i say his name too many times he's gonna appear but god can you imagine. it'd be like a super weird variant of bloodymary and it would be amazing
Calling gosplier a weird version of Bloodymary is hysterical imo. Like. They’re the originals but they are the weird ones. Ryan probably doesn’t even know who mark IS I love them
And yeah the wips are always out of control. It’s so wild to go from a wip with full world building and a developing magic system (good ol’ Minecraft. Hermitcraft specifically) to a fucking Dexter fix it fanfic where I ship Dexter with doakes. Help me. Of all my wips only one has an actual story laid out and the one that’s the longest currently (just started chapter 3 and currently just over 7,000 words. Help) is a make it up as I go thing. But it also has world building and a magic system but it’s so different to the Dexter wip I have and the mcyt wip and the other urban fantasy wip (that one being the one with a story structure already) and the murder mystery that’s still at less than 100 words.
Who knows tho. If the brainworms don’t leave us we may have to write it. Might help chug things along if you got someone working with you too
Hey so I had another idea.
What’s Eva’s reaction to the whole thing? Like. She’d have met Colt and court but how’d she react to everyone else?
That poor poor woman. Imagine her meeting Ken tho. There’s a whole nother dimensions humans can be living in that isn’t affected by the sun dying???? Let her see that. She’d explode I think
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
okay i wasn't on board with Starstruck at first because I wanna hit Tom with a brick for what he did to Colt, HOWEVER, you made me cry about it so-
Ryland and Tom get the closure they both needed and they actually wind up becoming friends again thanks to the communication system, it's less awkward than either of them expected it to be and they're both happier for it. Ry feels...bittersweet about being able to keep in contact with all of them, his batshit crazy family included, because the Eridians are absolutely extending his lifespan through some kind of science magic human kibble (ha) and he's getting the pleasurepain of watching them all age;
Colt and Jody have a baby, and he gets to see his twin going grey while their kid grows up through photos and video calls (how advanced is this communication system? who knows, let's pretend it's near-instant back and forth) and Ryland breaks down because the kid wants to be an astronaut like 'uncle Ry' and he absolutely will not tell the kid how much he didn't wanna be an astronaut. what is he, a dream crusher? psh.
Tom and weird cousin Ken are actually surprisingly cute together and he's glad Tom has someone that makes him happy now that he's doing better! Ken gets so excited to talk about his "job" and tries really hard to compare it to Beach--Ryland quietly wonders if maybe Ken got hit on the head a few times but he's happy his cousin and his ex are happy, so he doesn't linger on it too much when they do get to talk.
aaand since i have permanent Bloodymary brain worms i have to include Simon in this-
All in all Ryland is happy about how things are going, but on a day where he's scheduled to call or email Earth he just...doesn't. It takes a few days for an update and Ryland is panicking when he does send out a message, but when he does get the video message sent the entire family is absolutely shocked to see what looks like fucking Markiplier with one arm lingering in the doorway behind him. covered in bandages from neck to waist pretty much, looking wary and suspicious, and the brothers back on Earth are immediately on Big Brother Mode because who is this big angry lump behind you??? where did he come from?? and Ryland has to explain that this dude popped up in a blood-filled submarine in his little chunk of Eridian-made ocean and wowee isn't it cool that he's alive? completely brushing over the teeth on his face and the fact that he's more scar tissue than person ofc.
i think Simon would get along with most of the family honestly, he'd be a little wary of a few of them (Ken in particular, Simon can tell that he's not quite human even through a video and it freaks him out on a primal level. Ken is blissfully unaware.) but over time they all just...become a big interstellar family.
(side note, everyone is surprised when the people Simon ends up getting along with the best are uncle Holland's husband Jackson and Lars's partner Casey. they're quiet and a little broody and they just Get Each Other.)
I fear this may be getting out of hand I feel the itching urge to turn it into an actual fanfic. But I already have like 5 wips and idk if I have the mental fortitude to turn it into a full story.
But
But
But. Imagine. Somehow. Grace manages to get to Earth before they all die if old age and Grace finally gets to meet all his nieces and nephews and the rest of his extended family. I hadn’t even considered pairing Tom with Ken (starbeach? Stardoll? Who knows. New crack ship unlocked and I’ll cry about it when I’m not on a fucking train) but it oddly works. Haven’t watched nice guys yet but I gather from things that, yeah, Jackson is rather similar to probably either court or Casey (driver)
And then the eridians discover new dimensions through Simon as the quiet rapture would be impossible in phm and then they somehow meet Officer K (Blade Runner 2049 (which I also agent watched yet)) and this poor man is just. So confused and like. It’s a cyberpunk future from what I can tell and that poor man is so sad and pathetic and has no idea who these people are and- I might have to stop with spreading the rgcu.
But also throw in the markiplier egos if you wish like. Simon being able to tell Ken isn’t completely human because he reminds him of the vague impression of a weird pink man with a moustache who definitely wasn’t real but might have been and one day Simon asks if Ken knows anyone like that? And Ken goes silent, which, weird, he never shuts up. And drops the bomb that discodoll was canon but somehow, after a massive fight, Wilford willed it out of existence. But. Ken remembers. Because it happened in Barbie land. And then he comes clean that it’s pure coincidence that he looks like them because he’s not a distant cousin. He’s a living doll. And he too will never age. And they never noticed that he doesn’t look as old as the rest of them. And. And they are so confused and the realisation that other worlds exist kind of breaks all of their brains (eridians and Grace included but not Simon. He already knew) and then Tom gets really upset because by that point they’d been together for probably a number of decades and. I just seem to really like making Tom cry apparently.
I need to stop I think. Making myself cry on public transport is not the way
omg including the Egos would be fun, if i didn't have 15 wips staring down the barrel at me i would jump on this so fast!
Ken does feel a little bad for not telling everybody the truth right away but once everybody's over the shock maybe he can take 'em all on a vacation to Barbieland, Tom gets jealous of Barbie at first 'cause poor Ken still gets puppy eyes around her sometimes but then realizes she wants nothing to do with Ken in that way and he's like "girl you FUMBLED him look at this perfect specimen, your loss" and he gets all huffy and a little of his old personality starts creeping out but it doesn't get too bad. Tom's just a jealous kinda guy and that is HIS living doll tyvm.
which kinda circles me around to Lars bc let's say he goes on the family trip and he sees a Barbie with dark hair like Bianca, he goes a little pink around the ears and maybe he accidentally calls her Bianca instead of Barbie and some small part of him is gets a little closure from that. Barbie-Bianca thinks Lars is very sweet but she doesn't understand why he gets all misty-eyed looking at her alskdfj Casey is utterly unbothered and is way more interested in how the barbie cars drive without engines in them, no jealousy here, as long as his teddy bear is happy he's happy.
the Goose fam that didn't go on the trip is back home and meeting some of the Egos, K is now living in the same universe as the rest of the Goslings and he and Googleplier get along like a house on fire (after GP gets over the worst of his 'destroy all humans' mentality ofc) to everyone's surprise. Yancy and Court were cellmates at one time so they're chill and maybe even...cuddly...do i wanna ship Court and Yancy? maybe.
the possibilities with this HUGE crossover AU are limitless and i am absolutely going to be coming back to this post for fic ideas
Part of my emotion about it is that it’s a massive family. I have a massive family myself, excluding my half siblings families, I myself have 13 aunts and uncles and all of them have a t least 1 kid so I just have a massive family myself. But, unlike this one, mine is very splintered and split all over the country and some even live outside the uk.
But yeah. This is a massive au and 15 wips???? Are you ok?? I thought my 5ish was a lot lord help you
This is such a long thread and I will probably start something for it, whether my brain tells me it’s a good idea or not. Help us all wips are a special kind of hell
I’m also not all that familiar with marks egos, I was a jack kid personally but I’ve been slowly been working through marks work.
But also that thing with Barbie is hilarious. Tom somewhat reverting back to his old personality because he’s a jealous ass is funny as fuck. Colt definitely would’ve had to go to Barbieland to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. But also it’d be really funny to have the gosfam learn about the attempted patriarchy that Ken himself led and be mortified, Tom more at the outfit than the takeover specifically, and court fighting the urge to just deck him because that was a stupid move. Lars getting emotional about one of the Barbie’s looking like Bianca is just. So sad. And Casey just wanting him to be happy, that man doesn’t have a jealous bone in his body. Like at all. And that’s canon. He just wants his loved ones to be happy.
But I’ve also seen the idea that Ryan Gosling still exists. And have a personal headcanon for any media that takes place in any version of our realisty that the actors themselves still exist, because there’s so many unconscious references to media that it’d be impossible to tell what life would be like if certain actors never existed. Like yeah RyGos still exists and is a little perturbed by how many look alikes he has. Like. Help that poor man he’s going through a weird ass existential crisis several times over. So that bit about the gosfam seeing markiplier behind Ryland the first time is hilarious because mark fishbach (idk how to spell his last name) is definitely still a person and a very influential personality and it’s just really funny. Anyway
Help I’ve become attached and need to do something about it soon or I’ll combust. Help
to answer your question, no, i'm not alright, the brain worms are chewing on my frontal lobe like a gummy bear. i need to pare down the wips or i'm gonna go insane, i need to FINISH SOMETHING- but this thread is giving me so many ideas that the wip pile may yet grow larger. i'm in the trenches, send help
though the memes of Markiplier and the literal savior of earth being shipped would be so funny in-universe, i'm scared if i say his name too many times he's gonna appear but god can you imagine. it'd be like a super weird variant of bloodymary and it would be amazing
Calling gosplier a weird version of Bloodymary is hysterical imo. Like. They’re the originals but they are the weird ones. Ryan probably doesn’t even know who mark IS I love them
And yeah the wips are always out of control. It’s so wild to go from a wip with full world building and a developing magic system (good ol’ Minecraft. Hermitcraft specifically) to a fucking Dexter fix it fanfic where I ship Dexter with doakes. Help me. Of all my wips only one has an actual story laid out and the one that’s the longest currently (just started chapter 3 and currently just over 7,000 words. Help) is a make it up as I go thing. But it also has world building and a magic system but it’s so different to the Dexter wip I have and the mcyt wip and the other urban fantasy wip (that one being the one with a story structure already) and the murder mystery that’s still at less than 100 words.
Who knows tho. If the brainworms don’t leave us we may have to write it. Might help chug things along if you got someone working with you too
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
okay i wasn't on board with Starstruck at first because I wanna hit Tom with a brick for what he did to Colt, HOWEVER, you made me cry about it so-
Ryland and Tom get the closure they both needed and they actually wind up becoming friends again thanks to the communication system, it's less awkward than either of them expected it to be and they're both happier for it. Ry feels...bittersweet about being able to keep in contact with all of them, his batshit crazy family included, because the Eridians are absolutely extending his lifespan through some kind of science magic human kibble (ha) and he's getting the pleasurepain of watching them all age;
Colt and Jody have a baby, and he gets to see his twin going grey while their kid grows up through photos and video calls (how advanced is this communication system? who knows, let's pretend it's near-instant back and forth) and Ryland breaks down because the kid wants to be an astronaut like 'uncle Ry' and he absolutely will not tell the kid how much he didn't wanna be an astronaut. what is he, a dream crusher? psh.
Tom and weird cousin Ken are actually surprisingly cute together and he's glad Tom has someone that makes him happy now that he's doing better! Ken gets so excited to talk about his "job" and tries really hard to compare it to Beach--Ryland quietly wonders if maybe Ken got hit on the head a few times but he's happy his cousin and his ex are happy, so he doesn't linger on it too much when they do get to talk.
aaand since i have permanent Bloodymary brain worms i have to include Simon in this-
All in all Ryland is happy about how things are going, but on a day where he's scheduled to call or email Earth he just...doesn't. It takes a few days for an update and Ryland is panicking when he does send out a message, but when he does get the video message sent the entire family is absolutely shocked to see what looks like fucking Markiplier with one arm lingering in the doorway behind him. covered in bandages from neck to waist pretty much, looking wary and suspicious, and the brothers back on Earth are immediately on Big Brother Mode because who is this big angry lump behind you??? where did he come from?? and Ryland has to explain that this dude popped up in a blood-filled submarine in his little chunk of Eridian-made ocean and wowee isn't it cool that he's alive? completely brushing over the teeth on his face and the fact that he's more scar tissue than person ofc.
i think Simon would get along with most of the family honestly, he'd be a little wary of a few of them (Ken in particular, Simon can tell that he's not quite human even through a video and it freaks him out on a primal level. Ken is blissfully unaware.) but over time they all just...become a big interstellar family.
(side note, everyone is surprised when the people Simon ends up getting along with the best are uncle Holland's husband Jackson and Lars's partner Casey. they're quiet and a little broody and they just Get Each Other.)
I fear this may be getting out of hand I feel the itching urge to turn it into an actual fanfic. But I already have like 5 wips and idk if I have the mental fortitude to turn it into a full story.
But
But
But. Imagine. Somehow. Grace manages to get to Earth before they all die if old age and Grace finally gets to meet all his nieces and nephews and the rest of his extended family. I hadn’t even considered pairing Tom with Ken (starbeach? Stardoll? Who knows. New crack ship unlocked and I’ll cry about it when I’m not on a fucking train) but it oddly works. Haven’t watched nice guys yet but I gather from things that, yeah, Jackson is rather similar to probably either court or Casey (driver)
And then the eridians discover new dimensions through Simon as the quiet rapture would be impossible in phm and then they somehow meet Officer K (Blade Runner 2049 (which I also agent watched yet)) and this poor man is just. So confused and like. It’s a cyberpunk future from what I can tell and that poor man is so sad and pathetic and has no idea who these people are and- I might have to stop with spreading the rgcu.
But also throw in the markiplier egos if you wish like. Simon being able to tell Ken isn’t completely human because he reminds him of the vague impression of a weird pink man with a moustache who definitely wasn’t real but might have been and one day Simon asks if Ken knows anyone like that? And Ken goes silent, which, weird, he never shuts up. And drops the bomb that discodoll was canon but somehow, after a massive fight, Wilford willed it out of existence. But. Ken remembers. Because it happened in Barbie land. And then he comes clean that it’s pure coincidence that he looks like them because he’s not a distant cousin. He’s a living doll. And he too will never age. And they never noticed that he doesn’t look as old as the rest of them. And. And they are so confused and the realisation that other worlds exist kind of breaks all of their brains (eridians and Grace included but not Simon. He already knew) and then Tom gets really upset because by that point they’d been together for probably a number of decades and. I just seem to really like making Tom cry apparently.
I need to stop I think. Making myself cry on public transport is not the way
omg including the Egos would be fun, if i didn't have 15 wips staring down the barrel at me i would jump on this so fast!
Ken does feel a little bad for not telling everybody the truth right away but once everybody's over the shock maybe he can take 'em all on a vacation to Barbieland, Tom gets jealous of Barbie at first 'cause poor Ken still gets puppy eyes around her sometimes but then realizes she wants nothing to do with Ken in that way and he's like "girl you FUMBLED him look at this perfect specimen, your loss" and he gets all huffy and a little of his old personality starts creeping out but it doesn't get too bad. Tom's just a jealous kinda guy and that is HIS living doll tyvm.
which kinda circles me around to Lars bc let's say he goes on the family trip and he sees a Barbie with dark hair like Bianca, he goes a little pink around the ears and maybe he accidentally calls her Bianca instead of Barbie and some small part of him is gets a little closure from that. Barbie-Bianca thinks Lars is very sweet but she doesn't understand why he gets all misty-eyed looking at her alskdfj Casey is utterly unbothered and is way more interested in how the barbie cars drive without engines in them, no jealousy here, as long as his teddy bear is happy he's happy.
the Goose fam that didn't go on the trip is back home and meeting some of the Egos, K is now living in the same universe as the rest of the Goslings and he and Googleplier get along like a house on fire (after GP gets over the worst of his 'destroy all humans' mentality ofc) to everyone's surprise. Yancy and Court were cellmates at one time so they're chill and maybe even...cuddly...do i wanna ship Court and Yancy? maybe.
the possibilities with this HUGE crossover AU are limitless and i am absolutely going to be coming back to this post for fic ideas
Part of my emotion about it is that it’s a massive family. I have a massive family myself, excluding my half siblings families, I myself have 13 aunts and uncles and all of them have a t least 1 kid so I just have a massive family myself. But, unlike this one, mine is very splintered and split all over the country and some even live outside the uk.
But yeah. This is a massive au and 15 wips???? Are you ok?? I thought my 5ish was a lot lord help you
This is such a long thread and I will probably start something for it, whether my brain tells me it’s a good idea or not. Help us all wips are a special kind of hell
I’m also not all that familiar with marks egos, I was a jack kid personally but I’ve been slowly been working through marks work.
But also that thing with Barbie is hilarious. Tom somewhat reverting back to his old personality because he’s a jealous ass is funny as fuck. Colt definitely would’ve had to go to Barbieland to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. But also it’d be really funny to have the gosfam learn about the attempted patriarchy that Ken himself led and be mortified, Tom more at the outfit than the takeover specifically, and court fighting the urge to just deck him because that was a stupid move. Lars getting emotional about one of the Barbie’s looking like Bianca is just. So sad. And Casey just wanting him to be happy, that man doesn’t have a jealous bone in his body. Like at all. And that’s canon. He just wants his loved ones to be happy.
But I’ve also seen the idea that Ryan Gosling still exists. And have a personal headcanon for any media that takes place in any version of our realisty that the actors themselves still exist, because there’s so many unconscious references to media that it’d be impossible to tell what life would be like if certain actors never existed. Like yeah RyGos still exists and is a little perturbed by how many look alikes he has. Like. Help that poor man he’s going through a weird ass existential crisis several times over. So that bit about the gosfam seeing markiplier behind Ryland the first time is hilarious because mark fishbach (idk how to spell his last name) is definitely still a person and a very influential personality and it’s just really funny. Anyway
Help I’ve become attached and need to do something about it soon or I’ll combust. Help
we need to bring back old school tumblr communication and im so serious. sending an ask to a mutual just to say hello. seeing three different asks in your inbox all asking how your dentist appointment went. seeing a post you think one of your mutuals would enjoy and tagging them/sending it to them in the dms. nowadays its just silently liking a post or (if youre feeling extreme) replying under posts. WHAT HAPPENED TO US!! we used to be a proper community!!!! #LetsBringWhimsyBack
reblog if you want ppl to send you random lil' asks
pretty please, i need more enrichment in my enclosure
Hell yeah. Love talking to people
i think the funniest thing about the gosling cinematic universe is to me, is the fact that the phenomenon of people suddenly getting Super Invested In Ryan Gosling after watching PHM is not specific to him
this has happened to me (and a small group of friends) before, in almost frighteningly similar circumstances
we all watched Good Omens, decided that it was in fact The Absolute Shit, and then a few of us kind of went off the deep end and watched everything ever made by either Michael Sheen, David Tennant, and a few particularly dedicated (autistic /lh) soldiers among us watched everything ever made by BOTH.
we were shipping Tennants and Sheens together. We were shipping Tennants and Tennants, Sheens and Sheens, side characters that maybe had two words through the whole production, it didn't really matter if we could find even a CRUMB of chemistry that might exist, it was eerily like what's happening in the Gosling fandom rn (looking ever so lovingly at you, Sundaydriver. You're mostly very wholesome and i'm glad i found you by chance)
the point is that history is a wheel and we all must spin and it's really funny watching it happen in real time from slightly to the side
Ya know. Having been in the Sander Sides trenches since Thomases vine days makes it so funny. I knew Ryan Gosling exclusively from La La Land, which I have refused to watch in the decade since it came out until this week, as I’m stupidly picky with cinematic musicals. Will watch any stage musical I can but really picky about cinematic musicals. And then Barbie which I also only watched for the first time 2 weeks ago. But. Having done the Sander Sides thing. Then got into fucking Leigh Whannell because I love horror and saw is one of my favs. Then watched teen wolf and did the same thing to Dylan O’Brien. And those 2 are completely different in how they treat the other characters. Like Adam, David and Specs are triplets (Leigh’ characters) but Stiles somehow just becomes Thomas and then eventually Mitch (Dylan’s characters) and like. It feels weird that this has now happened for a 4th time for me. Help
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
okay i wasn't on board with Starstruck at first because I wanna hit Tom with a brick for what he did to Colt, HOWEVER, you made me cry about it so-
Ryland and Tom get the closure they both needed and they actually wind up becoming friends again thanks to the communication system, it's less awkward than either of them expected it to be and they're both happier for it. Ry feels...bittersweet about being able to keep in contact with all of them, his batshit crazy family included, because the Eridians are absolutely extending his lifespan through some kind of science magic human kibble (ha) and he's getting the pleasurepain of watching them all age;
Colt and Jody have a baby, and he gets to see his twin going grey while their kid grows up through photos and video calls (how advanced is this communication system? who knows, let's pretend it's near-instant back and forth) and Ryland breaks down because the kid wants to be an astronaut like 'uncle Ry' and he absolutely will not tell the kid how much he didn't wanna be an astronaut. what is he, a dream crusher? psh.
Tom and weird cousin Ken are actually surprisingly cute together and he's glad Tom has someone that makes him happy now that he's doing better! Ken gets so excited to talk about his "job" and tries really hard to compare it to Beach--Ryland quietly wonders if maybe Ken got hit on the head a few times but he's happy his cousin and his ex are happy, so he doesn't linger on it too much when they do get to talk.
aaand since i have permanent Bloodymary brain worms i have to include Simon in this-
All in all Ryland is happy about how things are going, but on a day where he's scheduled to call or email Earth he just...doesn't. It takes a few days for an update and Ryland is panicking when he does send out a message, but when he does get the video message sent the entire family is absolutely shocked to see what looks like fucking Markiplier with one arm lingering in the doorway behind him. covered in bandages from neck to waist pretty much, looking wary and suspicious, and the brothers back on Earth are immediately on Big Brother Mode because who is this big angry lump behind you??? where did he come from?? and Ryland has to explain that this dude popped up in a blood-filled submarine in his little chunk of Eridian-made ocean and wowee isn't it cool that he's alive? completely brushing over the teeth on his face and the fact that he's more scar tissue than person ofc.
i think Simon would get along with most of the family honestly, he'd be a little wary of a few of them (Ken in particular, Simon can tell that he's not quite human even through a video and it freaks him out on a primal level. Ken is blissfully unaware.) but over time they all just...become a big interstellar family.
(side note, everyone is surprised when the people Simon ends up getting along with the best are uncle Holland's husband Jackson and Lars's partner Casey. they're quiet and a little broody and they just Get Each Other.)
I fear this may be getting out of hand I feel the itching urge to turn it into an actual fanfic. But I already have like 5 wips and idk if I have the mental fortitude to turn it into a full story.
But
But
But. Imagine. Somehow. Grace manages to get to Earth before they all die if old age and Grace finally gets to meet all his nieces and nephews and the rest of his extended family. I hadn’t even considered pairing Tom with Ken (starbeach? Stardoll? Who knows. New crack ship unlocked and I’ll cry about it when I’m not on a fucking train) but it oddly works. Haven’t watched nice guys yet but I gather from things that, yeah, Jackson is rather similar to probably either court or Casey (driver)
And then the eridians discover new dimensions through Simon as the quiet rapture would be impossible in phm and then they somehow meet Officer K (Blade Runner 2049 (which I also agent watched yet)) and this poor man is just. So confused and like. It’s a cyberpunk future from what I can tell and that poor man is so sad and pathetic and has no idea who these people are and- I might have to stop with spreading the rgcu.
But also throw in the markiplier egos if you wish like. Simon being able to tell Ken isn’t completely human because he reminds him of the vague impression of a weird pink man with a moustache who definitely wasn’t real but might have been and one day Simon asks if Ken knows anyone like that? And Ken goes silent, which, weird, he never shuts up. And drops the bomb that discodoll was canon but somehow, after a massive fight, Wilford willed it out of existence. But. Ken remembers. Because it happened in Barbie land. And then he comes clean that it’s pure coincidence that he looks like them because he’s not a distant cousin. He’s a living doll. And he too will never age. And they never noticed that he doesn’t look as old as the rest of them. And. And they are so confused and the realisation that other worlds exist kind of breaks all of their brains (eridians and Grace included but not Simon. He already knew) and then Tom gets really upset because by that point they’d been together for probably a number of decades and. I just seem to really like making Tom cry apparently.
I need to stop I think. Making myself cry on public transport is not the way
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
Hey so ‘nother funny idea. Stastuck. Walk with me here.
Tom, in prison, sees the Hail Mary launch (every tv in the world is only showing it) and sees who’s on board. Sees his ex he never got over. And starts begging the guards to let him have his phone call. He calls Colt. Wtf is Ryland doing going to space on a suicide mission???? Colt, reluctant, tells him Ryland didn’t want to go. Ryder is desperate for a way to make amends with this family and begs Colt for a way to repay SOMEONE for how good Ryland was to him. Colt only asks for an apology for being an uncalled for dick to him and a sincere promise to get better. Ryder readily gives this. Prison has changed him he’s had a lot of time to reflect on his action.
Anyway, about a week later a stranger with a familiar face breaks him out and he’s got a new lawyer, who suspiciously also has a similar face and doesn’t act like a lawyer at all. They get him into therapy and it turns out drugs and alcohol mixing have had an extremely not good mix with his already undiagnosed issues (haven’t fully watched fall guy get so idk what I’d give him but people tend to go with OCD/Bipolar/something else I can’t remember off the top of my head but reads like historic personality disorder) and so he gets proper medication for his issues and a lot of therapy and a massive support system in the extended fam. He turns out to be really good with Clair and Holly surprisingly. And it spurs him into teaching, also motivated by knowing just how much his Ry loved teaching.
Also Tom is terrified of Rylands entire family (including Colt but he’ll never tell him that) and then gets absolutely flabbergasted by Ken when he finally meets this mysterious estranged cousin they don’t talk about much. They hit it off, much to the chagrin of everyone else, they are insufferably corny and both very theatre kids and they let everyone know.
Anyway getting off track
Tom also has a message for Ryland. It’s short and sweet and he’s so different to how Ryland remembers him. He’s grown his natural hair out and it’s shoulder length and curly and a really nice dark brown. He looks worn and tired but he also looks alive in the way Rylands only ever seen when he’s in front of the camera and he’s. He’s shining and Ryland thinks he’s beautiful like this and his voice is softer and has a quality about it that Ryland himself has from teaching and he wonders what Tom teaches (theatre would’ve been his guess but he actually teaches English (both literature and language. Idk if that’s a distinction that happens in America but it does here in the uk so imma go with it) he loves seeing the stories the children come up with and how out of the box children approach things they don’t completely understand) and Ryland regrets leaving even more.
Toms message is just him giving Ryland a small life update. Out of prison and in therapy. Medicated. Living a full and good life among Rylands many relatives. His adventures with Ken (ryland loves these idiots and is glad Tom doesn’t feel too outcast by his, frankly, terrifying family) and all about how he’s glad that he called Colt instead of, like, Gail or someone and he’s so incredibly grateful for the second change Colt gave him, he’s very very aware of just how differently that conversation could’ve gone. And he ends the message with just a simple ‘I love you’ but there’s so much more behind it and so much more he’d never be able to tell Ryland and he’s ugly crying by the end and he just wishes that none of this ever happened.
Tom gets a very lengthy message when the Beatles return and he’s both dreading watching it and out of his mind with excitement and he, hesitantly, asks Colt to watch it with him because he doesn’t think he’d be able to watch it alone and then bursts into tears seeing Ryland. He hasn’t aged much, if at all in these videos even though Tom knows it would’ve been about 13ish years since he got sent to space before they reached him and Ry is crying and he’s sorry he never got to remember the relationship they had and he’s sorry his putting them ALL through grieving him when he’s still alive. And. He’s just crying and wishing them the best in the world’s impending cold era and how he wishes he could be with them.
Anyway. Tom demands that Eva send some probes to Erid with stuff for Ry and just photos and stuff from his family and loved ones at least. And Ryland cries at seeing his cousins and niece grow into capable young women makes him so proud and so regretful that he didn’t have enough time with Holly or any time with Clair and he sees Tom with court and Colt and Ken and he’s smiling and happy and looking like the world has finally stopped kicking him while he’s down and uncle Holland looks so old now and he’s glad that alcohol poisoning doesn’t seem to affect him and he’s glad he’s living to old age and he sees Lars and Casey as till living and they seem happy and he sees Jacob also not looking like the world wants him dead anymore and he’s glad because Jacob wasn’t having a good time when he left and he sees Sebastian looking more at ease too and some Frito’s aren’t from Clairs Polaroid, some are from social media and he’s glad that Seb finally got to open his beloved jazz club and. He’s crying again and Rocky is asking if they’re happy tears and Ryland just nods and keeps crying.
Rocky secretly asking the aerospace team if they can send one back to Earth for Graces family and they ask Mary for any recordings that Grace didn’t send back and then it just becomes a fully fledged communication system between the 2 planets and Ryland eventually gets to teach Earth kids again even tho he’s old and looks different and is covered in scars no one could guess the origins of and Rocky is also secretly finding a way to slow Graces aging down so he can do more of what he loves
Coltland Gentry universe, Stratt's sent Ryland off to space (she did NOT know he had a twin and an older brother) and she randomly catches some interview with Colt on tv while she's in prison and her heart just fucking SINKS when he mentions his twin brother being involved with 'cool space science stuff' because the likelihood of a man that looked EXACTLY like the world's sacrificial lamb having a scientist twin was...slim to none. and she's not stupid, she can see the expressions he makes and there's no way it could be anyone else. right down to the nose scrunch when he laughs.
she makes a few calls, Colt finds out what happened to Ryland (in a 'sanitized for the public' way), and then *whoops* Sierra fucking Six is kidnapping her from prison and demanding real answers about his baby brother. Eva Stratt, for the first time, has Regrets.
coming back to this 'cause it's funny, but i think the two of them having a standoff would be so funny- they both just stonewall each other until Court gets tired of it and pulls out a gun, but she just stares at it and back at him like 'sir this is the least of my worries rn' and he's both concerned and absolutely baffled because he was not expecting this and didn't plan for it
Colt, meanwhile, is sobbing on Jody because wtf else can he do??? his baby (by five whole minutes) brother is gone and he can't get him back. he tried getting their uncle Holland to track him down before he found out Ryland was IN SPACE and Holland's drinking heavier than usual once he finds out-
i'm having fun with this can you tell
what other family members should i chuck into this mess
Driver and/or Lars. Like. Imagine both those boys finding out a member of their family is gone forever and they can’t get him back. Thinking about a triplet driver/ryland/colt situation and Lars as a cousin or something. Plus adding in an uncle Holland and maybe another cousin in Sebastian or even Jacob would be both hysterical and devastating. Especially because Jacob, Lars and Sebastian all have (relatively) normal lives that a normal human being could have, whereas the disgraced scientist, government sanctioned (not really) weapon, the broken stuntman, the drunken detective, and the silent secret getaway driver all have weird experiences. Hell Lars still fits in the weirdness because of his delusions. Jacob being a playboy is hilarious personally because that man would HATE Tom Ryder I think, and Sebastian is just very confused about his family and wonders why they’re all insane lmao
yknow who else would be funny in this?
distant cousin Ken that nobody's heard from in fifteen years.
he emerges out of the woodwork one day smelling like plastic and strawberries and he finds out about Grace and the poor boy is starstruck, he doesn't understand the gravity of the situation and goes all starry-eyed like "His new job is SPACE?!!" and he cannot for the life of him figure out why everybody's so sad, who would be sad with a cool job like space??
someone has to sit him down and explain that Grace can't come back and then they have to deal with big sad puppy eyes (it's probably Lars and Driver gently explaining it to him, bless them both, they're the only ones with the patience for his [K]energy) and poor Ken's just beside himself with worry because his little cousin is lost somewhere in space and can't come home now. even if he does have a cool job, that's scary!
Let’s gently not tell him that Ryland will die in space, yeah? That’d crush the poor guy and that’d be sad and also no one would want to deal with mopey Ken. Imagine Ken going to Stratt in prison and like he’s not the first one she meets so she’s already dreading ANOTHER Grace relative but she is wholly unprepared for Ken and his hesitation question if how long the trip will take and how long he has to wait to see his favourite cousin and if there was a possible way he could send Ryland something to remember him by? And Stratt can feel tears even if they don’t fall and all her guards are balling and whichever family member escorted him is shaking too because they’re all wondering the same thing, personally think it should be Driver because he can actually intimidate Stratt to an extent (lovely personal headcanon tbh(I’m crying about it)) and she’s never seen him this emotional and it’s getting to her even more and she’s quietly asking her contacts to send a probe to the Hail Mary with messages from his entire family.
And but this point I think Ryland would’ve woken up and probably just met Rocky when he sees a human probe heading towards him and is highly concerned about what could be on it. And all of these messages from people who he thinks he should know and who all look very similar to him and he, rightfully, and depressingly, comes to the conclusion that he had a family and he still doesn’t know why he’s in space but he knows he left people behind and so he makes a log about it to send back to Earth and he’s crying and telling them he doesn’t remember his family and he’s desperately sorry he can’t be with them. And then he gets all of his memories back after visiting Rocky’s ship and makes one last log telling his family goodbye and he loves them and he misses them and he finally remembers them and he’s sorry a million times over that he couldn’t stay on earth but he knows what he has to do to save them all and he’s crying again and Rocky is silently observing this and quietly gives Ryland more fuel to get him quicker without him knowing which ends up being the reason they make it to Erid before Ryland starves to death and Ryland was only working with the calculations of what Rocky told him and he thinks he’s not gonna make it but they do and just in time for him to be stable.
