Ambitious, but Rubbish

On the Cutting Edge of Cocking About - A place for me to post drawings I have done. Sometimes interesting, usually always bad. I now have a Redbubble store if you really want something I have there.  Feel free to contact me for the web address since I can't put it here.

[byjove]

I never thought I would be siding with the pope’s involvement in politics and cheering him on. I will say that.

[byjove]

[itsacon10]

Further Adventures From the Home Office

I had a settlement conference today and in discussing legal custody, I had the following conversation with my client, the father. (And yes, it is relevant.)

Client: I want to just ask you something.

Me: Ok.

Client: Is this a control issue?

Me (after thinking for a few seconds): In your case, it is not a control issue. What it is is a trust issue. She's not trying to control you, she just doesn't trust you. Because at the end of the day, she is required to communicate with you about what's going on, but she doesn't trust you to make a good judgment.

Client: Because, and I think it's more like this, when a family is intact, when they're together, and the mom and the dad are having to make decisions together, it's the man that has the final decision. And here, with her wanting to have final decision-making, it's just going to be too much for her. So I should have as much say as her.

[writingdose]

© _ADWills

[birdiethewitch]

Wait I thought everyone did that-

[itsacon10]

@missdaviswrites

[titsay]

[dionysiaproductions]

Write your silly story. Make your silly art. Create your moments of foolish pleasure. If the is world unchanged by your tenderness, then at least you’ll have done something loving with your time .

[flootzavut]

Tags by @nb2000

[itsacon10]

Happy Year of the Horse

[itsacon10]

Further Adventures from the Home Office

I am, apparently, a swinger.

Court is like high school among the people that work there, so there's a lot of gossip and rumors. One of my fellow attorneys mentioned that there were rumors about me. So I asked another attorney, and she said that people thought I was a swinger. And apparently, I was doing it over a decade ago.

This is news to me. My wife says I don't have time for it because I'm too busy. Which is true.

Of course, as we were laughing about it, I had to make sure I didn't let anything slip out...like I've written pornographic fan fic, or drawn and painted some pretty explicit pictures, or what me and my wife actually get up to in the bedroom.

(The attorney who informed me of my swinging lifestyle was also the same attorney that had me look up something on my computer called 'Kinky-Con' because she didn't want her Etsy algorithm messed up and got stuff shown to her she was not interested in, because it happened to her before. There was nothing that I saw for that Con that I didn't know what it was, but I didn't say that to her.)

[itsacon10]

5 things that have made you smile in the last few days?

I just saw this (tumblr hasn't been on my mind much for a long time). I'll give it a shot, but no promises.

My wife. (Honestly, goes without saying. If it wasn't for her I don't know where I'd be right now. She makes me a better person.)

My work wives.

Taskmaster.

Constructing a ceiling medallion for my mother-in-law.

I'm not getting a number 5. It's been that shitty recently.

Thank for asking!

[itsacon10]

Further Adventures from the Home Office

This has been a real shitty year for me. Most recently, my uncle died last weekend. The funeral is scheduled for next Thursday. Next Thursday I have a trial scheduled in a neglect. Because I'm a private person, I ask to have the trial adjourned without going into the specifics, but I don't make frivoulous requests.

The request is denied. I'm livid. Part of the problem is that we have a temporary judge who seems to not want to leave anything for a new judge starting next year. While part of me appreciates that, particularly compared to the other judge where nobody can resolve cases, there's no reason for this judge to push through a trial. It's not urgent (yeah, neglect, but kids aren't even with the mom and bf, and given their substance use, not going home any time soon (also not in foster care)). There's no reason to be a jerk. Then again, this is the same judge, after nearly a year here, does not understand that the attorneys get stuck in other courtrooms ALL OF THE TIME so she can't call her cases exactly on time, or sometimes even before they're scheduled. (Admirable, but c'mon.)

Thankfully, I was able to short circuit her control of the cases by "twisting" my client's arm on a settlement and getting it removed from the judge.

But now, two hours later, and I'm still shaking and on edge. I feel like I want to cry. It's just been an awful year.

[itsacon10]

I know it's been a long time since I've drawn anything. I've been extremely busy...and then there's been my usual other stuff.

I visited the Impressionism exhibit that just opened at the National Gallery of Art. It's the first time "Impression, Sunrise" by Monet is being exhibited in the US and things lined up so, of course, I had to go.

I couldn't sit and sketch any of the works on exhibit because it was too crowded. However, I drifted through some other galleries and came across another Monet, Argenteuil

Claude Monet

Anyway, here's my simple sketch done based upon that work.

[fanfictionwriter101]

Tips for Writing More Genuine Children (Part 2/3 - Language)

Now, just before we start. I’m talking about English speaking kids, I have very limited experience with bi-lingual kids or kids not having English as their first language.

Let’s talk about how kids talk. 

Quick, general statements.  ~Kids are either dead silent or nonstop talking. It flips so quickly.  ~SO MANY QUESTIONS. ~Some kids are shy some arent. Depends on the situation/who’s around/what the kids like.  ~As stated in Part 1, kids aren’t inherently dumb but they also don’t understand because of lack of context. Their language reflects that. 

Also, development is different for some kids. Developing doesn’t reflect how smart they are, it’s just how it goes (like physical growth). In my experience, firstborns will talk more and earlier than siblings later.  

Top Tip: Watch some YouTube videos (if you can stand them) aimed at the age of the children. This kind of language on those should be used in your fics. If they’re young (under 5) find some videos teaching them how to talk on YouTube to see where they should be.

Age 0-6Months

They’re not going to be talking. Okay. Even if they’re hella smart, it’s just not going to happen. Noises are much more likely, tears and whines when sad. Grumbling when angry. Just like adults.

But, they will respond to people. If someone’s angry and shouting they’re going to understand that and react accordingly (upset and scared). Loud noises will make it cry or it’ll look for the source of it’s name being called. 

From here on out, kids are really literal and see patterns where an adult wouldn’t. An example is “daddy bye” to mean ‘dad’s leaving’. The baby isn’t saying ‘bye’ because it knows this is what we say to people leaving because it means something. There’s no reasoning behind it. But it’s said whenever someone leaves so that means that the word has something to do with leaving. This kind of thing carries on till about 8.

Age 6Months-2Years

Words! Yay!! Baby’s saying it’s first words, very often mommy/daddy or the name of their favorite toy. (Mine was Turtle). They’re not going to be using any advanced words or anything hard to pronounce. 

Around 1 and a half is when they start using sentences. Usually, this means combining two/three words to mean something else.  “Daddy bye” would mean ‘dad’s leaving’. 

Also, they’re starting to understand words. In New Zealand, one of the first words kids learn is ‘Ta’ which basically means ‘give me that’. If you said to a 1-year-old ‘ta’ when they’re holding a toy they’re going to give it. (They might not want to but not the point) 

Age 2Years-3Years

Now they’re talking! They’re going to be asking questions and responding to others. They know about 400 words at this point and can string together stories. (If they want to). This is also the stage where shyness becomes a trait in how they talk. 

It’s not called the terrible twos for nothing. This age group knows how to ask for things and what they want. While we’re on the subject, tantrums. Kids don’t have tantrums for nothing. They’re upset and they don’t know how to deal with it or express their emotions. Screaming and crying generally gets this across and the best way to deal with them is staying calm and talking to them. 

Questions as well. Just, constant questions. “Why? Why? Why? Why?”

Age 3Years-5Years

Basically just talking like an alien now. They can get their point across but sometimes their words are made up. An example of the ‘made up word’ would be run. A kid might say I ‘runned’ instead of ‘ran’ because that makes sense. It’s what we do to other words (-ed) but sometimes we don’t. The English language is full of little trips that kids get caught on. 

Their sentences are 5-10 words at 3 and then continue growing as they get older. Especially if they’re in a school environment. 

As they get older they’re going to be able to comprehend them, eg, answering where the dog went and who he saw. It’s basic fact, not a lot of emotion. But, they’re going to forget within a few hours. Also, they’re going to be telling stories like their dream or what happened at school.

NO MORE BABY TALK FROM HERE PEOPLE. I BEG YOU.

Age 5Years-7Years

Unless there’s an actual physical problem (tied tongue, stuff like that), there should no longer be a lisp. The child should be able to talk freely and easily. 

Stories are more detailed, sometimes more than needed (like colours of clothes or weather. Doesn’t impact the story) and they’re going to remember more stories. 

They’re still may get caught up on some tense changes like before but much less. Also, they will now input their own emotions onto stories and answer the why questions when doing reading compression. Here’s where they should be able to read and write at a very basic level. 

This stage of life is boarding on adult level speaking. But they’re still going to be using general words and speak more like a layman than a specialist. 

Age 7Years-9Years

They’re basically speaking like little adults. 

They can control their pitch and volume well, they can change tenses and they’re using specific terms - especially about stuff they learned at school (so, science or English conventions “that’s a metaphor”). Complex sentences are now used with ease. Stories are told well and they’re going to remember what they said a lot better. 

And we’re done! 

[itsacon10]

Here’s something also important: 7 and under have no time permanence. Ask a kid when something happened that they’re telling you about and they won’t be able to accurately do so. I’ve asked kids about when things have happened and used prompts in order to help place it, such as ‘when you lived with mommy’ or 'was there snow on the ground’ and it still doesn’t help. (I know it’s not going to, but I still have to ask.) They will pick a time period and say that’s when it happened. It’s amazing how many things happened in the last week. Even if I meet with the kid several months apart, the second time I meet with them they will tell me the same things that happened before I met with them the first time just happened again.. even if it was impossible for it to have happened.

[itsacon10]

I'm revisting this because of a kid I interviewed last night.

She's 12. I've known her about 6 or 7 years. Had all sorts of questions and she had absolutely no handle on when anyth8ng happened. I knew better than her what the timeline was and I was only getting second hand from her (asshole) parents. She also tried to describe to me what had happened that afternoon and stopped and started going back and forth in time it was ridiculous.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that kids are unpredictable in how they relate events. It's important to figure out, from an author's standpoint, how the kid is and write to their personality.

[inthetags]

Reblog and put in the tags whether you prefer hard sci-fi or space opera and why

[itsacon10]

Further Adventures from the Home Office

From recent texts to my wife:

"In case it ever comes out, I'm just letting you know that there is now a text record of me setting up a meeting with a hooker"

and

"My hooker hasn't shown up yet"

[mothmans-favorite-lamp]

[fai-faery]

[catchymemes]

[transformativeworks]

AO3 Is Always Free to Use

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[yespumpkindoodlesthings]