lessons i've learned in year 2021
The lessons that I will be putting below are not chronologically in order. Happy reflecting!
Before starting the lessons I've learned and experiences in my life, I want to emphasize that this year 2021 taught me a lot of things and it is the year of questions in a bad and a good way. Those questions I have in my mind eventually help me to know who I am. The year 2021 is the year that I've discovered and deeply know myself more and tailored my beliefs and values on what would I be in the future.
Despite the struggles and challenges I've encountered this year, I am still grateful. It might sound insensitive for those people who suffered and find this year cruel but actually, I also suffered.
So here are the lessons I've learned in year 2021.
1. Stop seeking validation and pleasing other people even our friends and family but I will only seek it from God.
- Seeking validation from other people is unnecessary and exhausting, they didn't even care what's going in our minds and they are care also about themselves. They also don't have the energy to remember all our embarrassing moments nor to us literally. I think if we will not stop or reduce this kind of thinking it will empty us it will drain us and even dictate who we are. It's so delicate to let people decide on who we are.
- I know we love our friends and family and how they also want good for us. But, somehow the best thing that they have in their mind for us is not really the best thing for us. I appreciate that I am surrounded by genuine and good people in my life. I love them and I'm thankful to God that I've met them. We could ask for their opinions and insights but at the end of the day do not let them decide on how we will run our lives. I've learned this quote that we should not hold accountable other people just because we've followed their suggestions to us.
Do not make decisions if you will blame it on someone.
2. Do not be afraid to be rejected and reject someone or something.
- Rejection is a part of life. We cannot avoid it from happening to us. It is normal, it is not just being accepted lightly in this world. When we say rejection we always associate it with negative quotes.
Being rejected is saddening and sometimes maddening but maybe it is the way to teach us to be patient or to redirect our lives or to even modify something in our lives, you'll know it tho. You know I think when you will be able to make yourself experience several rejections it makes us mentally and emotionally strong. It trains and challenges us. We non-obviously benefit from it and it unconsciously gives the courage and handles rejections appropriately.
Rejection is notably based on how we look at it but I choose to look at it like that.
Moreover, rejecting someone or something is also difficult because we don't want to make people feel bad or miss opportunities by not accepting them. But I've realized that rejecting is also a kind of boundary that we've imposed on ourselves. Directly saying NO to others and saying YES to ourselves is one of the things that we are saying to ourselves that we love them. We want to protect our energy, our mental state, and even heartaches.
In this area, I'm still having a hard time doing it, especially with my friends. I still have these flaws where I will say I will try to attend or do this but deep inside someday I just want to rest. I just don't want to give 50% attention to them cause I don't have much energy.
Therefore, I'm very blessed to have a best friend, friends, and family where someday I could say to them that I don't have the energy or in the mood to go out or do some things. On the other hand, I ask them if are they also in the mood to do this or that.