Live, Love and Learn

Life has hurdles to jump. Dreams to conquer. Most importantly friends to share expierences with. My life mostly a rollercoaster - abit of this and that. This page is full of the future and present and tells you of the ordeals i've been through. I hope some will help advise you and guide you through your journey. I most of all hope you enjoy, giggle and remember this page as it comes from the heart. My quotes, photos and blogs all are my opinon. Its my opinon, heart and brain jumbled into a beautiful and thought provoking illustration Enjoy and thanks for reading <3 Click this lovely drop down bar and ask questions V V

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Edgar’s Mission

Meet Sundance the kid, just arrived at Edgar’s Mission. Bottle, jacket, now off to find some friends.

“If we could live happy and healthy lives without harming others… why wouldn’t we?” www.edgarsmission.org.au [Source:Facebook]

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Watching youtube videos of youtubers vlogging...Why am I spending my time watching other people live their lives..

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‘Friends’

Prepare yourself to read an anger induced rant.

So firstly i’m 20 years old, and had ample of experience with making friends, keeping friends, falling out with friends etc. But what i’ve realised is that friends are the most unreliable people on earth, yes a few interaction are rewarding, but sometimes it doesn’t feel like it is worth the effort. 

At the start of this year I went into my second year of uni, feeling completely isolated and alone. I had no friends on my course. For some strange reason my friend, who I had known for 5 or so years, now acts like I no longer exist. I’m dead to her. I understand maybe she didn't want to be as close to me because maybe i interfered with her making more friends and her university experience. But it doesn't mean you have to act like I don’t exist. I wasted years being nice to you, listening to you and being kind to you. We helped each other on assignments and we laughed and had good times. But then suddenly without a warning ‘poof’ i’m dead to her. The way she treated me was unacceptable and it made me go through a very painful month of self hatred, guilt and low self esteem. It was the worse expeirence; the fact she could just act like i was dead. Not a care in the world like i didn’t fucking matter. Had no empathy for my emotions. How would she feel if her friends suddenly ignored her, saw her in the street and acted like they never even knew her. It was the worst thing imaginable  I had no friends and I felt like I had done something wrong. I sat on my own in university like a pathetic friendless student. I watched my ‘ex friend’ look happy, interacting with all her knew friends with no remorse for the misery she caused me. I didn’t mind sitting on my own but it was the fact that I was so easily forgotten about.  I felt like i’d never gain any friends at university and that my university experience would be rubbish.  I did what any normal student did to fix that and joined a society. 

That led to me loosing faith in my friendships too and a further dip in self-esteem. A friend who i’d know 5 or so years (Different friends), who texted me and flirted with me all through summer, was in that society. I thought that was good, turned out i was wrong. He completely acted like i didn’t exist that we had no friendship and no connection. I confronted him and he said it was because ‘no one in the society liked me’. I cried all night, i’d tried so hard to make friends and my friend said he didn’t want to acknowledge my existence because I wasn't good enough. Further lose in my faith in friendships.

Then there have been friends that have stopped talking to you because they don’t like your other friends. It’s not my fault you don’t like each other. I never took sides and i tried to stay friends with them both, needless to say that failed. Not only did i loose a close friend but she turned my other friends against me and said they hated me. I did nothing wrong; was nice to both of them and never bitched about either of them. So there is no point in being nice to people.

But then there are friendships i’ve put my all into; shown them compassion, talked to them in difficult times and if i supposedly put one foot out of line. They ignore me and act like i don’t exist. I’ve done nothing wrong. Hated me at some point but comes running to me when she needs someone to talk to. When she’s fallen out with her friends or they aren’t around. I’m sick of being used and then getting hurt when you treat me like shit.

Luckily, I have one close friend but most of the time I don’t feel like she makes an effort with me. I love her and i’ve shared everything with her but thing are changing between us. I also have my boyfriend who I love to pieces who has watched me fall apart at uni because i’ve been treat like shit. 

I think i’m too kind for my own good; all my friends i’m kind to them, compassionate, would do anything for them. They walk all over me, use me when they need me and then kick me to the curb. I’m sick of it; I want one of those friends in the movie when i’m crying and i can ring them up and talk to them. That friend i can rely on to come round at the dead of night with ice cream. That friend. But i’ve never had anything close. I never will. After so many years of crap friends i’ve surrounded myself with mere acquaintances those who i can go down to the pub with and be silly with but not a real fulfilling  friendship. I often wonder what i’ve done wrong and why I can have this friendship. But i’ve come to the conclusion i’m too nice for my own good and too naive and easy to manipulate. I can’t hold friends because im the silly one, the kind one, the dependable one but not the one anyone wants to keep. The one when it comes to it can be ignored and so easy to act like they don’t exist.

 I’m sick of being walked all over. I’m sick of not having my outlet. Im sick of not having a friend being their for me. I’ve lost my faith in people and frienships.

Rant over.

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[itsjustabigandscaryworld]

I used to have 1000 or so followers, none of them interacted with me.. now i have 580. Still no-one interacts with me :(

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nomnomnom

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Well... that is interesting

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My dream puppy.

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Highland cow are just the cutest.

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Not happy in the slightest. 

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Don't know what to do.

[coolthingoftheday]

Hey guys! I know this isn’t the usual thing that I post, but I just wanted to post about it. I just found this website where you can play all of your old favorite SNES and Sega Genesis video games from the 90s - The Lion King, Aladdin, Pocahontas, Sonic the Hedgehog, Mickey Mouse and the Land of Illusion, Ecco the Dolphin, and all sorts of other games. I know you can probably find a lot of these on emulator downloads, but if you’re anything like me then you’re awful with computers and technology, so I thought that some people would appreciate being able to play all of their old favorites online. 

Here’s a link to the website, and here are links to some of the ones I posted here:

Lion King

Aladdin

Beauty and the Beast

Alice in Wonderland

Pocahontas

Ecco the Dolphin

Sonic & Knuckles

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Reposting on here because there are Pokemon games on that website.

[checkkonetwo]

I just googled “college christmas trees” and I found some gems that needed to be shared

and my personal favorite