I'll tell you hwat

titties: out. hoops: in. yee: haw

[whitepeopletwitter]

Have you ever done that?

[just-shower-thoughts]

As a teenager, Jim seemed like the coolest guy in “The Office”. As an adult working in an actual office, Jim would be absolutely horrible to work with.

[tastefullyoffensive]

by Rustled Jimmies

[iwouldlovesomepotatosmybrother]

the comic we didn’t know we needed

[youcanthandelthetruth]

Some old fella came up to me at work and asked a question only he didn’t quite figure out if he should call me “sir” or “ma’am” by the time he got to the end of his sentence and in a moment of apparent panic ended up saying “captain” instead. Absolutely made my day.

[meganbagels-deactivated20251216]

Ideal pronoun

[elyel]

[iwouldlovesomepotatosmybrother]

literally no one: h-

girls with nose bleeds: ^^^

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[whitepeopletwitter]

And looking like them.

[meanplastic]

I’m in tears but also bopping

[surprisebitch]

have you ever listened to something so horrible that you just had to continue listening even though it’s much healthier to just stop it cause that’s this

[thats-sowild-blog]

This is what they were training us for…

[iwouldlovesomepotatosmybrother]

i opened this video in church

[ammit420]

my entire concept of how stocks work is the same thing as the tim & eric skit where they just sold prices

[yesterdaysprint]

The Minneapolis Star, Minnesota, September 25, 1943

[klefable]

i love little kids that share too much information. today a girl came in with her mom to order food and i told her i liked her dress. she said “thanks my mom stole it from target”

[gayray-deactivated20170310]

this blog follows me and this is their only post

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

be thankful that theyve chosen you

[bpdsnek]

my mitochondria clearly aren’t working because this bitch has NO FUCKING ENERGY

[spacelesbians-archive-deactivat]

Mitochondria machine broke

[kamuis]

actually the funny thing is that this post is basically describing what researchers now think is the underlying cause in chronic fatigue syndrome (as in there is notable dysfunction in mitochondria that means less ATP is produced, especially under stresses)

[caramel-ramamel-blog]

THIS BITCH EMPTY

[hxavensxnt-blog]

Y E E T

[whitepeopletwitter]

Also, All Star by Smashmouth.

[drawing-prompt-s]

I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where

Please, please, no. I’m not strong enough for this

-Prompt Prophet

[writing-prompt-s]

Your church-going, God-worshipping sister adopted a small child and you’re excited to see them. But when you do, the child is a menace. They’re throwing things everywhere, setting furniture on fire with seemingly nothing, chanting in Latin to summon demons, but the weirdest thing is that your sister doesn’t seem to mind.

[tinderventure]

Suffocate

[surprisebitch]

this has the same chaotic energy as “then perish”