Fluff and Pain...

...but mostly fluff. This is where I'll dump my random writing. Predominantly USUK, I will write other ships and I take drabble requests! NSFW will be present. Icon by me and background by me. Buy me a Ko-fi! :D https://ko-fi.com/ixiepixie

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Internship Games

Rating: T

Warnings: None yet

Summary: Once again, it is that time of year. The time for interns to survive endless coffee runs and the most meaningless tasks foisted upon them for the amusement of their superiors.

It is time for the Internship Games.

Notes: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NARCO LOOK I MADE SOMETHING WOW OOOH AAAAH

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Wow I should write something.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Proud to be on the Couch Again

Rating: M

Warnings: Fail Sex, Excessive Patriotism, read at the risk of your sanity (jk tho this is tame compared to some of my shitpost drabbles)

Summary: What do you get when you mix a midlife crisis, a horny husband, and some knee slappin American music?

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[ixiethepixiewrites]

W-will there be a pt2?

Probably. I'm gonna finish the story of FFXIV Shadowbringers tonight or tomorrow which will most likely mentally destroy me, so we'll see.

I really enjoyed writing this one so I have high hopes for more, and lots of ideas.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Happy 4th.

Rating: T (subject to change)

Warnings; None

Summary: Alfred is an idiot thief.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

So like

Cardverse AUs man... my weakness...

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Rose, Emily, and Wine

Rating: UH I forget, probably G tho

Warnings: Divorce mention, tooth rotting fluff

Summary: Newly Divorced and Depressed, Alfred takes some time off to be with his kids.

A/N: Made for the @usukustwiceperyear event, Recovery is Possible.

The parking lot was always full whenever there was a festival going on. It seemed that no matter how early Alfred decided to come to these events, parking was scarce. His little Emily, a beautiful girl about 6 years of age, was bouncing impatiently in her booster seat next to the car-seat of her baby brother. Al chuckled, glancing back to give her a patient smile. This of course only made her even more eager to go out and play already, and though he couldn't see, Alfred could tell Connor, his half year old son, was fast asleep next to her. Thankfully, a parking spot appeared in the next row. After some maneuvering and squeezing, Alfred's SUV was nestled between the two other cars.

As carefully as he could, he opened his own door, then the door to the backseat, mindful of the cars next to him. Hopefully they would do him the same courtesy and not just throw their doors open to hit his car. Emily crawled out of her seat, and stepped in the grass of the vacant lot that had been repurposed as a temporary parking lot for the festival goers. Al could see the look on her face, she was ready to get going. He tried his best to grab the diaper bag and got her brother out in a timely manner. As he had guessed, the little man was sleeping like a rock, just like his daddy after a long shift at work.

The stroller was the next to come out, and Alfred could tell Emily was nearing the end of her limit and would start whining soon, so he worked fast to set it up. Once her brother was secure and shaded from the son, Alfred offered her his hand.

“Alright pumpkin, ready to go have a blast at the park?”

The response was an immediate and blinding smile. Alfred's own almost faltered, but he didn't want to look sad in front of her, so he kept himself together. She looked so much like her mother. The very same mother who was probably in Tahiti having cocktails on a beach with that rich doctor she had left him for. Yeah, she was likely living her dream beach life right now, without a care in the world since she had given full custody over to Alfred. Sure she paid her fair share and demanded holidays that worked for her schedule and paid no mind to the hours he would be losing at work. Alfred paused and shook his head. He had to stop thinking about her. Focus on the kids, this day is all for them.

Smiling to try and cheer himself up, Alfred took Emily's hand with his left, and steered the stroller with his right, going to the gate of the park so he could purchase their tickets. The festival going on this month was all about Zucchini. An odd premise, but man that zucchini bread was absolutely to die for. Not to mention it was a way to get Emily to eat a vegetable without any arguments! As long as he didn't tell her what was in it.

Connor was still sleeping, all this noise didn't seem to bother him in the slightest, which was totally awesome because watching both of them in a place this crowded was already a challenge on any normal day. Once he bought a few loaves of that sweet sweet bread, and a little trinket of Emily's choosing, they would be able to sit and relax under a tree with some lunch.

With that plan in mind, Alfred paid the entry fee for himself and in they went! Emily was holding onto his hand diligently, even though he knew she would like nothing more than to run off and explore every nook and cranny of this place. She was a good girl though, and stayed put where she was.

This whole family outing had been a suggestion from a friend. Well, sort of a friend. He and his ex-wife used to go to marriage counseling, not that it helped much in the end, and it was their old counselor who had suggested Alfred take the kids out more often. Something about strengthening bonds and yadda yadda. Alfred didn't need to be told twice, he loved his children dearly and family outings sounded like a good idea to get him out of this depressive slump. Maybe being around people who had their lives together would help him figure things out too.

Probably.

Maybe.

Unlikely, but dammit he was going to try.

Without even realizing it, Alfred had let Emily lead him to a tent that had someone selling cheap toys. Little things like plastic fans with pretty designs and knock-offs of branded items like light sabers and pokemon plushies. There was a strange green one that looked like a pikachu, but he wasn't 100% sure if it was one or not. After picking through the fans and other assorted items, Emily eventually picked out a plastic baseball bat and ball set. Funny enough, Alfred could have sworn he had one exactly like it when he was young too. They would have to come back when the park was less crowded from the festivities to try it out.

After picking up the off-color pikachu to give to Connor, Alfred steered them towards the food stands. It wasn't long before he had a bag full of bread and muffins to take home, and some extra candies for Emily if she cleaned her room. There was a man beside him who was apparently trying zucchini bread for the first time. His accent was what caught Alfred's attention initially.

“My word, are you sure there is a vegetable in there? I don't taste a thing!”

The next thing Alfred noticed was that the man had lovely green eyes and a nice smile. He was slightly shorter than Al, but held himself with so much confidence that he may as well have dwarfed Alfred in comparison, at least for the moment. After a moment of staring, Al finally realized that there was no longer a tiny hand attached to his own, and he looked around frantically for Emily. To his immediate relief, she hadn't gone far. There was a little girl that looked about her age next to the accented blond man, and the two girls were chattering away about the toys they had gotten here.

“Emily, honey, you know you're not supposed to let go of my hand.”, Alfred gently scolded her as he wheeled closer, getting on one knee to be at her level.

The look on her face was close to a pout, but she didn't let it stay for long. “I'm sorry daddy... but I saw my friend! We go to the same school class!”

“Oh? Who is your friend?” Alfred couldn't help but smile at this development.

He'd been so busy with the divorce and work, that he realized he had never asked his little Emily about her school at all. Alfred didn't want to do that to her, and listened with interest as she babbled on and on about what games they like to play together.

“Rose, darling, we are going to go sit and have our lunch, come along.” The man from before spoke to the girl next to Emily.

After a moment, he realized that they weren't alone and turned to look at Alfred. “Oh, terribly sorry, was she causing any mischief?”

“No no, not at all!” Alfred waved him off. “Just telling me about their school. I didn't know your daughter was friends with my baby girl.”

Before the other parent could respond, Emily let out a whine. “Daaaaddy I'm huuungrryyyy!”

“Alright, alright, come on then.” He laughed, taking her hand, but she didn't budge.

“I wanna eat with Rosie!” Emily demanded, her grip tight on the other little girl's hand and feet firmly planted.

Now, Alfred could technically just scoop her up and take her to eat anyways, but that seemed like it would be too extreme. It would be easier to just find a spot where they could all eat together.

“Okay baby cakes, we can eat with your friend, as long as her parents are okay with it.” Alfred caved, looking to the father beside himself.

“I suppose there's no harm in it.” Came his response, and a hand was soon offered to Al. “Arthur Kirkland, Rose's father.”

Alfred grinned, glad to be able to sate his daughter's need for food with a friend easily. “Alfred Jones, Emily and Connor's father. Ain't that right little man? Don't think I didn't hear you hiccup~”

Baby blue eyes stared up at him as Connor stirred, awakening from his own hiccups. Alfred counted down from 3 on his fingers and immediately Connor began fussing as he hit the third one. Right on schedule, as always. Shaking the bottle of formula he had at the ready, Al smiled sheepishly to Arthur. “Sorry uh, let me just get him situated.”

“Oh it's no trouble at all, I'm sure these two can stand to wait another moment.”

The smile Arthur gave Al wasn't one of pity, and for that he was grateful. It was refreshing to just be looked at like a normal person again, instead of a single father struggling to raise two little demons on his own. Not that his kids were bad, just handfuls. It did sort of help that his work hours were regular, but it also meant that he had to pay for a sitter almost every day. Maybe he should consider daycare once Connor is old enough... what was he doing again? Right! Formula!

Connor had begun to cry in earnest before Alfred caught his attention with the bottle. “Who's my growing boy, huh? It's you~”

Alfred couldn't help himself as he made faces and did the stupid baby voice he always swore he would never do when he was a teenager. Life was funny like that. He was still waiting for the punchline for this whole divorce thing. Maybe one day he could laugh about it all, but that day was definitely not today.

Emily was tugging on his pants, signaling that she really wanted them to get a move on to the food stands. Alfred couldn't help but smile and ruffle her hair as they all made the trek over there. The silence between them seemed a little awkward, almost as if both of them were afraid of asking where the other's partner was. Alfred didn't think he was ready to talk about that yet, so he was grateful that it wasn't coming up, even if it was just silent instead.

The smell of fried goodies of all kinds wafted through the air. Alfred ordered deep fried zucchini for himself, and some chicken strips and fries for his picky little eater. Connor seemed content to watch passerby as he sucked away on his bottle, which Alfred took as a blessing. Arthur ordered next, getting the same as Alfred had but with an order of chicken kabobs taken off the stick for his daughter. At least one of their kids ate vegetables. Maybe Rose’s taste in foods would rub off on Emily.

Once they had all the food, the pair of parents set out to find a decent spot to sit down on this hot mid-August day. With all of the park's benches and food tables taken already, Alfred lead them to a nice spot under a tree instead. He pulled out a decent sized blanket from the diaper bag and set it on the ground. Emily, of course, ignored the blanket, and chose to sit in the cool grass with Rose right beside her. Once they had food in front of their faces, they were eating and chatting like they did this every day. Which, well, they did. When school was still in, anyways. Hopefully they would share classes again this year.

Connor began to fuss, so Alfred took him out of his mini prison and set him on his belly in front of where he and Arthur were now seated on the blanket. That seemed to satiate him, for now, as he continued to lift his head and grab at some toys Al had set down.

“Almost 7 months old, and he's already lifting his body and rolling like a pro. Guess he'll be able to sit alone soon.” Alfred mused aloud, watching his son play on the blanket.

He could almost feel Arthur's smile in his voice. “Yes, I remember when my little Rose was that age. I had nanny cams everywhere so I could witness all of her firsts, even when she was being watched by others.”

“Oh man, that's a good idea. Emily was easier since I had... had more help.” Al couldn't say the word ‘wife’ or even ‘ex-wife’, “Im struggling to always find a sitter for Connor here.”

Clearing his throat, Alfred hoped that none of his words seemed unnatural or too choked. It's been hard for him to talk to people for the last few months. Arthur seemed to notice, but thankfully said nothing. Maybe he knew what it was like, or maybe he was just being polite, but Alfred was grateful just the same. A nice cool breeze blew past his face, making him smile again.

“I'll find a way to make it all work, though.” Alfred whispered, “I'll take care of my little angels alone if I have to.”

Arthur pretended not to hear those words, knowing that they were private thoughts.

_________

The next time Alfred and Arthur met was at the beginning of the new school year. Both of their little girls were entering the 1st grade, and thankfully had the same teacher. It was a parent-teacher meet and greet, though Alfred felt a little awkward being there all alone. Most of the other children had both parents there, with only a few exceptions. Arthur was one of those exceptions. Alfred couldn't help but be curious, though he knew it was none of his business to ask why. Maybe his significant other was just busy, or maybe sick, though he hoped it was the former rather than the latter. A brief thought of ‘maybe he is alone too’ crossed Alfred's mind, but he quickly shook it away. Maybe one day he could ask, but today was not it, so he would have to suffer his curiosity a while longer.

Their girls were naturally thrilled to be together again, and it was after the meeting that both of them came to Alfred with bright hopeful eyes. Of course, those innocent looks only made him suspicious. When little girls batted their eyes like that, it could only mean one thing. They wanted something. What that something was, Alfred didn't know, but he did know that Arthur had also picked up on the vibe these two were giving off. That's why Arthur was the one to confront them first.

“If you want something, you had best ask before it is time to go home.” He tsked, looking at his watch as if to emphasize the importance of time.

Alfred couldn't help but laugh. “Don't ask, don't get is what I always say. So what are you two wanting to ask?”

Big brown eyes stared right into Alfred's soul, his little Emily making her best puppy dog face. “Daddy, can Rosie and I have a sleepover?”

Alfred shrugged. “It's Friday, so I don't see why not, but you have to ask Mr. Kirkland here too, okay?”

Rose fiddled with her own hair, looking up at her father hopefully. “Please?”

“Please what?” Arthur crossed his arms to look imposing, but Alfred could see a hint of a smile on his lips, “You have to be specific, Rose.”

Playing the hardass when he was really a pushover, Alfred was liking his man more and more by the second.

Rose bit her lip. “May I sleep over at Emily's house...? Please?”

Eyes softening, Arthur knelt down to his daughter's height. “Of course, lovely. As long as Mr. Jones says yes, then you may. Seeing as he already did, I suppose I'll have to get his address and number so I can drop you off.”

Alfred's cheeks pinked a little. His house was still a mess, holy shit, he needed to get home and clean! Writing down his number and other info, Alfred handed the slip to Arthur before hurrying out.

“Come on Emily, you have to clean your room up before she comes over!” That got a whine from Emily, but she complied just the same.

Arthur's fond smile was unnoticed by Alfred, as he had already left.

Thus began a cycle of weekend sleepovers for their girls. Of course, they couldn't do it every week, but almost every weekend had these two sharing a room to play games together all day and night. Sometimes they even stayed two days at a time, though not very often. It was mostly when Alfred had the opportunity to pull a double shift and wouldn't be home to pick Emily up. Little Connor usually stayed with his brother or a sitter for those nights.

It took months to build his courage, but Alfred finally asked Arthur into his own home for a drink. Just a glass of wine while their daughters played their little games around the house. He was absolutely thrilled when Arthur accepted, but now he was unsure. The silence was stretching between them, and Alfred had no idea what to say. Eventually he just blurted something out.

“Don't you just hate those customers that just don't know how to take no for an answer?”

Arthur had raised his eyebrow and taken a sip of his wine. The simple actions drew Alfred's attention to the other man's eyes and lips. He was starting to panic when Arthur finally answered.

“Honestly, I just despise customer service in general. All of it. I'm so glad I got a desk job with little public interaction.”

Breathing out a shaky laugh, Alfred shook his head. “You're lucky. My trade has me dealing with people all the time, but what can ya do?”

“What is your work, Alfred? If you don't mind me asking, that is.”

The way Arthur said his name just made Al melt a little inside. Oh yeah, he was falling hard. Too hard. It had been over half a year or more since his divorce, when was it okay to date? Was Arthur even available? Shit he hadn't thought this through. Just answer the question, maybe you can ask him.

“I'm a goldsmith for a jeweler here in town, but sometimes I work the counter and let me tell you, these people who know nothing about my profession but act like they know it all just piss me off.” Alfred rambled on, “I mean, they don't realize that I'm the one who actually works on the rings until they see me do it, but just- ugh!”

Arthur laughed then, and the sound made Alfred's heart skip a beat. He loved that laugh.

“I had no idea you were a skilled artisan like that, Mr. Jones.” Arthur teased, “Perhaps one day I could come into your shop and have my earring fixed.”

That caught Al's attention. “You have a piercing? Which ear?”

“The gay one.” Arthur laughed. “Both, actually, but I'm allergic to cheap metals, so I only have one good pair of studs and the diamond fell out.”

Alfred nodded, grinning. “I never got my ear pierced, they kept changing which one it was, so I just gave up. Anyway, you can just bring it to my house sometime and I can fix it here. I have my own set of personal use tools.”

“Is that so? What will be my payment then?” Arthur raised his brow and took another sip of wine.

The girls could be heard from down the hall, singing on Emily's little karaoke toy. Connor was making cute baby noises inside his playpen in front of the couch. Dogs were barking outside, and traffic was passing by as usual. All of that went silent for Alfred. He swallowed dryly and looked down at his own wine, cheeks red, but not from the alcohol.

“Well... maybe... a date?”

Arthur's smile was enough to tell Alfred that he had said the right thing.

“Deal.”

The divorce was still a sore spot for Alfred. Maybe he would never stop hurting, or maybe he would become numb. Or maybe, just maybe, Arthur could show him the road to recovery.

From one divorcee to another, maybe the pain could be replaced with something better.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

May the Best Gingerbread Man Win

Rating: G

Warnings: usuk, fluffy, makes no sense

Summary: An unexpected visitor comes to Alfred's door as he prepares for a gingerbread contest.

A/N: Leave it to me to be uninspired and wallowing in a block until the last day possible. This is for @fvck-amx , SURPRISE, I'm your secretly late Santa! Sorry if this makes no sense, work has me worn out LMAO Christmas season retail hell is ending, but it's far from over. Now it's RETURN season hahahaha save me.

“Come oooon dad! I wanna play hide and seek!”

That simple sentence, while harmless enough, had been whined out by Annie Oakley Jones, daughter of Alfred F Jones. Said father was currently in the kitchen of their little apartment, cooking up a batch of gingerbread cookies. Christmas carols could be heard coming from the tv, probably a commercial, and a little tree sat in the only empty corner of the small space. It wasn't long before the stomping of tiny feet drowned out the music, slowly making their way to the kitchen. Soon enough, there was a girl of 5 standing next to the oven, hands on her hips.

“Daddy, you promised! You came home from work, so now you play with me!”

Alfred looked to his little angel, eyes tired but his lips were smiling. There was no getting past her, she was so smart.

“I did, didn't I, baby cakes? Let me just finish up this batch, then we can play.” He wiped his forehead, getting some flour streaked across it.

The sight had Annie giggling, poking her father's leg. “You made a mess, Daddy!”

Taking a look around the kitchen, Alfred could see that she was 100% correct about that. He had made a mess, but this was all for a good cause. The annual city gingerbread house contest was coming up fast, and Alfred had somehow managed to make it to the final round. Of course, he couldn't count on his victory yet. Old lady Kirkland from Santa Claus Lane, may she rest in peace, had been Alfred's stiffest competition. Yet even after her passing, someone new had come into town. Arthur Kirkland, her grandson, was pushy, conceited, a jerk, and dangit, he knew her recipes.

With a family tradition of winning, it was obvious that the whole city favored Kirkland as the likely winner. At all the rounds so far, the man had acted as if he had been born to win, and every time Alfred had tried to speak to him, the jerk had run off with some lame excuse! Talk about rude!

Well there was no way Al was letting that guy win, not this year, nor any other year. He was going to win it for his little Annie, and spend the prize money on the Christmas gifts she deserves. Speaking of Annie, the child was currently giving her father ‘the look’. Alfred chuckled, knowing that she gets that look from her mother. He'd have to mention that to her when Annie went back after the holidays.

“Daaaaad...” Annie pouted, her bottom lip sticking out. “How much longer?”

Ruffling her hair, Alfred grinned at his sweet child. “Just a little longer, okay sweetie? Why don't you go pick up your toys, then once you finish, I should be done cleaning up the kitchen too.”

Giving him a look of skepticism, Annie eventually let out an over exaggerated sigh, throwing her arms up dramatically as she walked back to the other side of the room to do as she was asked. Theatrics aside, she was a good listener most times, and usually didn't need to be told twice. Such a good girl.

It took a little longer than he expected, but Alfred soon had the kitchen cleaned and was ready to play with his little girl. Too bad she was fast asleep on the couch, holding her oldest doll close. Alfred sighed, disappointed in himself for not paying attention to Annie when the holidays were just around the corner. Maybe this contest wasn't worth it.

Picking Annie up, he carefully took her to his room and tucked her in on the bed. Alfred whispered to her, smiling sadly. “Sweet dreams, my angel. Tomorrow I'll play with you, I promise.”

A knock at the front door had Alfred leaving the bedroom, shutting the door behind himself quietly so he wouldn't disturb the slumbering child within. Another knock had him wondering just who it was visiting at this hour of night. Sure, it wasn't late late, but it was late enough to be suspicious. Baseball bat in hand, Al glanced out the peephole of his door, ready to chase off any bums or druggies, but there was no need. Familiar, and infuriating, green eyes were all that met his vision.

Cautiously, Alfred opened his door a crack and peeked out at his new rival. How had he even found this place? They had never exchanged addresses.

“Kirkland..? What are you doing here?” Alfred questioned, keeping the baseball bat behind his back. Just in case.

The shorter, sandy blond man coughed. “Ah, I was just... in the neighborhood?”

Brow raised skeptically, Al internally debated on just slamming the door in Arthur's face. “How did you even get my address? And that doesn't explain why you're here at all. Unless it's to gloat about your ‘upcoming victory’, because I'm not interested in hearing about it.”

“No, no, I-I didn't come here to talk about the contest... I just, ah, figured we could... go out for a drink perhaps? Friendly conversation and all that.” The tips of Arthur's ears were pink, as were his cheeks, which struck Alfred as odd.

Was he being asked out by his new rival? Perhaps to get Alfred drunk so he'd spill all his baking secrets? No way!

“Get lost, Kirkland, if you're here to undermine me and ruin my chances in the contest, then you can-”

“This isn't about the bloody contest! I'm just trying to ask you out for drinks, you dolt! Like a d-date! Gods, you Americans...” Arthur began muttering curses under his breath.

Now Alfred wasn't stupid, even if he could be dense at times, but right now he was picking up some weird vibes from Kirkland. If this was a date, why now? Why didn't he ask at the contest after parties instead of acting like a jerk? There were so many questions left unanswered in Alfred's mind, that he was beginning to get a headache.

“So let me get this straight-”

“There's nothing ‘straight’ about this.”

“Ha ha, funny. So you're tellin me you want to take me out on a date tonight?”

Arthur's flustered face was all the answer Alfred needed, even as the Brit was speaking. “Well, yes, that is why I came out to this godforsaken part of town.”

“I'm going to ignore that last comment. Anyway...” Alfred sighed, glancing back inside his own home, “I can't go out with you...”

It was obvious from Arthur's expression that he was about to lash out at Alfred and laugh the whole thing off after being rejected, so Alfred spoke again before he could.

“My little girl is only five and she's already in bed. I can't leave her alone, and it's too late to call a sitter. So... maybe we can go out tomorrow morning? Coffee shop near the contest hall?” Alfred looked at Arthur with a shy smile, “I wouldn't mind your company, but only if you don't mind that my little Annie tags along.”

This new information seemed to take Arthur by surprise, as he wasn't responding. There was a long pause before he spoke at all. “You... have a child?”

“Annie, yeah, my baby angel. Before you ask, yes I'm divorced, and I'll spare you the story of high school sweethearts that discovered their inner rainbows. At least until we have drinks in our hands in the morning.”

Feeling more at ease with the situation, Alfred stepped through the door just enough to offer his phone. “Your number?”

“Oh! Oh, yes, right.” Arthur scrambled to get his own phone out of his pocket and into Alfred's hand so they could trade numbers.

A little hesitant as a thought occurred to him, Alfred quietly asked. “Me having a kid isn't a deal breaker, right..?”

Arthur caressed Alfred's still flour caked hands with his own as he returned the cell phone. “I wouldn't still be at your door if it was, love.”

“Pet names already? You move fast.”

“Call me anything embarrassing, and I'll be sure to sabotage your icing.”

“Aww, thanks sugar pop, glad to know you're not above subterfuge to win.”

It took only a moment before they were both laughing, standing there in the apartment building hallway. Arthur looked beautiful when he was smiling, it was a nice change. Maybe this could work out.

“I'll see you bright and early then, Jones.” Arthur teased, using Alfred's last name again as if they hadn't just agreed to a date.

Al smirked, leaning on the doorframe. “Nine O'clock it is, gotcha. Hope that's early enough, I gotta get Annie bathed and dressed and figure out how the hell to braid hair again-”

“I can't wait to meet her then, and I expect perfect braids in her hair, just like the braided lights on your entry last year.”

“You saw that?”

“Grandmother gushed about you constantly.” Arthur admitted, “And now... I can see why. A loving father and a talented baker. Quite the catch, as she always hinted to me.”

“Well I gotta hand it to her,” Alfred leaned in close, “She passed down some good looks.”

Oh yeah, Alfred could get used to this. Flirting was so much easier than fighting, and seeing Arthur's red face daily was going to be a real treat.

Clearing his throat, Arthur offered Alfred his hand. “About the contest, I want to wish you good luck. May the best man win.”

“I think you mean, may the best GINGERBREAD man win.”

“I plan to.”

“There's that gloating I was waiting for.”

[ixiethepixiewrites]

So uh

Tbh my blog will likely still be here, I hardly make nsfw and if I do, it's on AO3 or in my google docs where no one will ever see it. If I AM gone, you can find me there under the name "ixiepixie".

Basically everything here is over there, except maybe 1 or 2 drabbles, but I have all of my writing backed up so I'm not too worried. I'm gonna go through and make sure I have them all, but I'm reasonably confident that I'll be fine.

I am also "@ixbranna16" on twitter and instagram if you want my garbage art.

Also I am ixbranna16 on PSN and Steam AND Minecraft if ya'll ever wanna play games together. Just message me.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

It my birth day.

[katiewrites-deactivated20241107]

OTP Drabble Challenge!

Rules: Followers send a number to your ask, along with a pairing, and you write a drabble using that dialogue in your piece! Try to keep up! Expect a TON of requests!

“The doctor said it’s normal” - “Well that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.”

“Baby, you’re not a bother.” - “I’m too needy, you don’t deserve it.”

“Come with me to the other room.” - “We’re not going to talk about this now.”

“Did you just hiss at me?” - “Are you judging me?”

“Don’t yell at me like I’m a child!!” - “DON’T THROW SCISSORS!”

“Here, take me blanket/jacket.” - “I told you, I’m not cold.” *shivering*

“Did you hear that?” - “I’m telling you, I’m haunted.”

“I just wanted an easy day with my boyfriend/girlfriend. Is that too much to ask?”

“Why are you awake right now?”

“Come over here and make me.”

“I want my best friend back.” - “Kevin is over there.”

“H-how long have you been standing there?” - “Long enough.”

“You’re lying, you’re blushing.” - “Shut up, no I’m not!”

“No, I’m not talking to you.”

“No more!” - “Okay, fine, I won’t send you any more selfies.”

“What do you have?” - “Pizza rolls and Cup O’ Noodles…that’s about it. Popcorn?”

“The salad here is really good.” - “Do I look like a fucking rabbit?”

“Open this.” - “Can you say please?”

“I just came to say goodbye…” - “Bullshit, you just feel bad.”

“You’re on level 176.” - “Can you judge me harder?”

“Jinx, you owe me a coke.” - *can’t speak until they buy a soda*

“Please don’t leave me.” - “I don’t want to go”

“Babe, I’m sorry.” - “Suck my ass.”

“Liar, liar, pants on fire!” - “Seriously, you’re worse than a kid.”

“You can’t ride a bike?” - “Why are we whispering?”

“Is it that time of the month?” - “You literally ask me that whenever I’m mad at you!”

“We’re going downtown.” - “There’s a strip club downtown.”

“You weren’t supposed to hear that.” - “Well, you shouldn’t be saying it then.”

“It’s not mine, I swear.” - “How is it not fucking yours!”

“Take it off.” - “Like a bandaid?”

“I told you…” - “Yeah, yeah, yeah, quit nagging.”

“Boo?” - “You’re my boo.”

“Don’t you ever do that again! You scared the shit out of me!”

“You broke what?!?” - “Don’t worry, I’m okay.”

“Why’re you dressed like that?” - “Does that mean it looks good or should I change?”

“Fine, just do what you have to do.” - “Can you stop being so freaking cute so I can concentrate?”

“…then I picked up your coffee by mistake.” - “All I want is an apology.”

“Well, this is awkward.” - “Don’t touch me.”

“You can’t make me.” - “What are you? Five?”

“You’re a blanket hog!” - “Leave me alone and stop being so selfish.”

“It’s not fair that you’re hot and funny.” - “Look who’s talking…just kidding, your jokes suck.”

“I hate you.” - “No, you don’t.”

“Should I be worried?” - “Is the grass green?”

“You’re kidding me?!” - “Shush, my mom never taught me.”

“I’m your lock screen?!” - “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“Will you go with me?” - “As long as you hold my hand.”

“Baby, I’m scared.” - “You don’t have to be; not as long as I’m here.”

“Come inside, I’m sorry.” - “Not until you apologize.” - “I just said I’m freaking sorry.”

“Your voice is sexy.” - “Your ass is sexy.”

“If I asked, you’d say no.” - “You don’t know that.”

“Seriously, the chimney?” - “The squirrel can’t win!”

“32?” - “I’ll prove it!”

“It’s just so little and adorable.” - “That’s what she said.”

“You’re not mature enough to be a parent.” - “Try me.”

“Take a chance.” - “Umm…let me think…no.”

“Game’s over, you son of a bitch!!” - “Okay, just don’t hit me.”

“You forgot about my birthday!” - “In my defense, I forget about a lot of things.”

“You need more stamina.” - “No, I need more steak and eggs. So…get on it.”

“Can you dance with me?” - “You’re not mad?”

“I’ll smash it, I swear.” - “You smash it and we’re done.”

“Move!” - “Why would I move if I’m so comfy where I am?”

“I’m not going in.” - “Then we’re not going to get a treat after.”

“I really would’ve liked it if you told me your parents were coming to town.” - “I really would’ve liked it if you put underwear on before coming into the kitchen.”

“I found it in the recycling bin.” - “Well, you’re the one killing the environment, so who’s really in the wrong here?”

“We bet, and you lost.” - “But tattoos are permanent.”

“Can you quit being so sassy?” - “Can you quit being so controlling?”

“Are you getting jealous?” - “You’re changing your outfit, now!”

“What time is it there?” - “We’re in the same time-zone.”

“Quit flirting.” - “I didn’t mean to-”

“I just don’t know what happened.” - “You’re too good for them.”

“You have a cute nose, don’t make me break it.”

“Tell me what I can do to help.” - “Sing me to sleep.”

“You still need your baby blanket?”

“Did you black out?” - “I feel like I’m gonna puke.”

“Let’s just bury the hatchet.” - “Fuck your hatchet.”

“I bet it’s a boy.” - “I bet it’s a turtle.”

“Spare change?” - “You can’t be responsible, you don’t get your wallet.”

“Cuddle or leave.” - “So is that a no to supper?”

“Are you high?” - “I’m just so fucking tired.”

“Why did I marry you?” - “It took a lot of convincing.”

“Who’s texting you?” - “Umm. nobody.”

“You have two choices.” - “Neither of which I like…”

“I want a dog.” - “I want a cat.”

“Chinese food?” - “Do we even know what that’s made of?”

“These sheets are stained.” - “That’s disgusting.”

“You don’t know how to change a tire?” - “Give it a rest, would you?”

“That’s my ex-boyfriend/girlfriend.” - “Well, kiss me so they see.”

“We got lucky. You’re not gonna do that again, right?”

“Hey, babe, look what I found.” - “GET THAT OUT OF THE HOUSE NOW!!!”

“You’ve been replaced.” - “Alright, we’ll see how you feel when you need me to kill a spider in the shower.”

“Are those slippers?” - “Is that you being mean? AGAIN?”

“You forgot your book.” - “No, I lost my book!”

“You’re weird.” - “Or you’re just basic.”

“We need a vacation.” - “You read my mind too much, it scares me.”

“Why’d you hug him? You love him?”

“Sorry.” - “Good choice.”

“Luck? Nope. Skills.” - “If it’s skill then do it again.”

“Why can’t you just believe me?” - “Because you lied about it before.”

“This bath is too damn hot.” - “This is why we can’t do cute things. You complain too much.”

*Make up your own*

Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!!

[infinitalia]

tis I, the bringer of gays

y’all would not believe how many pics of these dorks I drew during my hiatus

[ixiethepixiewrites]

If you are afraid of spiders or have issues with seeing them, do not go under the read more.

I was at work, taking stuff to the stockroom while another associate was cleaning out stuff from the truck that came in and we both saw this big black spider hanging upside down from its web.

Naturally, I went into full ass panic mode when I saw this.

Say hello to a black widow. My camera is kinda shitty when I zoom in, so it blurred out the color of her abdomen, but fucking trust me, that little hourglass was there and staring me in the face. (not to mention the fact that the web structure and her position in the web are clear giveaways that she is indeed a widow spider)

My coworker just looks at me like, "Should we kill it?"

LIKE HE NEEDS TO ASK. I give him this stare and tbh I'm probably looking scared shitless, like "It could kill us!"

Neither of us wanted to get close though, but we found the handle of a broom or something, basically a 5 ft stick, and he smashed her.

At least it didn't look like she had any web sac with babies in it, or so fucking help me I'd have set that stockroom on fire just to ensure the deaths of all those venomous little demons.

If you work in the US, please be mindful of things you grab in the stockrooms, especially closer to winter, black widow bites aren't usually fatal, but CAN be.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk, I'm not gonna sleep for the next few weeks.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Power of Fate

Rating: T

Warnings: Some swearing, and very bad flirting, usukus

Summary: Alfred works at the local power plant, and it's his turn to answer the angry phone calls during a blackout.

A/N: This was my entry for @usukustwiceperyear , Uncommon Professions. I know this is an odd setup for a power plant but TBH this is how my dad worked in our small ass little town in Ohio, at least as much as i can remember about it. If they DID have a real secretary, I never met them, and I hung around that power station a lot LOL there were so many buttons and knobs in there I wanted to touch but instead I just watched the voltage gauges and the AMP reader move around. 

Clear sunny skies, that was the weather forecast for the rest of the week. One would wonder then, why was the power flickering out across town? From the mayor's office to a small hole in the wall tarot reading shop, the town's electrical systems had been compromised. Naturally, this had most of the people who lived in this small town upset. When people get this upset, what do they do? Angrily call the power plant, of course!

Every time the power went out, or a blackout was scheduled, the workers of this small town plant played rock paper scissors to see who would act as secretary for the day. Alfred Jones, one of said workers, was the one who had come up with this system. Normally, he never lost a game of rock paper scissors, but today it seemed that his own luck had reversed. As his coworkers laughed, leaving him by the phones, Alfred cursed his sudden bad luck. Before he even had time to get settled in, the phone was ringing.

So it begins.

About 30 angry callers in, Alfred was feeling pretty fed up. They soon found out that the power issues were caused by a truck running into a pole and taking it down. It was unfortunate that it happened on a day when they were repairing the generators in their plant, so they didn't have any backup power for the town like normal. Having to explain this to a bunch of unreasonable townsfolk was damn near impossible. Most didn't care why the power was out, they just wanted to know how long it would take to fix. As soon as he mentioned it could take all day, people started with the shouting.

By lunchtime, Al was sure that the whole damn town had called in by now, even the people who were on the outskirts of their power jurisdiction! It was around this time that he got the most interesting call of the day.

“Municipal Power Plant 7427, this is Jones, what can I help you with?” Alfred recited the opening line he had memorized during his last blackout call session.

He'd only done it once before, and today reminded him exactly why he strove to never lose that game of chance. There was some muffled cursing on the other end of the line, before a very loud and very accented voice began shouting at him. “HONESTLY, I move to this bloody hamlet for some peace and to run my business aiding the rural areas just as my own cards had foretold, yet here I am, sitting in the dark with a customer waiting, yet I can't read their fortunes if I can't see it! Who is in charge over there? I demand answers!”

Well that was new. Alfred had never heard this particular voice before, and as attractive as the accent was, he was simply tired of being yelled at today. “Sir. Sir, please. Calm down. A truck knocked a power line down on the way from our mother plant to this town on a day when we had maintenance scheduled. We can't provide backup power until we finish-"

“I don't care about that! I can use a candle if I need light!” The angry voice continued ranting. “What I absolutely cannot abide is the air conditioning being off! It's too hot to burn candles, and the fan would blow my cards around too much, and I am unable to get any work done until this is solved!”

“I can't help you more than I already am, sir. Either we will finish maintenance, or the larger company will finish repairing the downed line. It's honestly out of my hands.”

Waiting for another shout, Alfred prepared for the worst. It never came. Not because the man had calmed down, mind you. He had either hung up, which was unlikely, or his phone had run out of power. In any case, Alfred felt relieved to be free from the noise for a short time.

That time lasted about five minutes, when someone else decided to call in.

It was a solid few months before Alfred lost the blackout raffle again, his coworkers overjoyed at their revenge on the ‘lucky one’. Twice in one year, that was a new record for Alfred. Thankfully, the Summer heat was dying down, the cool breezes of Autumn taking over in its stead. At least they would get less complaints about air conditioners. The thought alone was enough to remind him of that one angry caller, the one with the alluring accent. Despite not knowing the man, Alfred hadn't been able to get that voice out of his head.

Remembering vague details about how he had a new business in town, Al had asked around. It seemed a proclaimed ‘psychic’ had moved into their little community, and was gaining popularity as their very own local herbalist as well. He sounded interesting, to say the least, even if Alfred didn't believe in all that fortune telling magic mumbo jumbo.

It wasn't long, however, before Alfred didn't have any time to think at all. Calls came flooding in, people shouting at him for a good half of the day. Once again, right around lunch time, the phone rang and a familiar accent blasted through the speakers.

“IS THIS GOING TO BE A REGULAR THING IN THIS BLASTED TOWN?”

Ah yes, there is was. Alfred couldn't help the chuckle that escaped his lips. “Municipal Power Plant 7427, this is Jones--"

“What is so damn funny, hm? Again my power is out, and I have some very delicate brews in the fridge that need to be preserved!” The voice huffed. “Not that someone like you would understand the importance of such things.”

“Sir, we are doing everything we can, but the generator broke down so just bear with us. It shouldn't be too much longer now.”

As if it had heard him, the generator roared to life, prompting Alfred to step outside so he could avoid the noise. “Now see? Just as I said--"

A loud crash from inside was accompanied by shouts and the sound of the generator sputtering to a stop. Well, shit. “--or maybe not.”

Alfred hated how smug the voice on the other end of the line sounded. “My my, so the stars were right...”

Rolling his eyes, Alfred went back to his seat inside. “Oh please, everyone knows your ‘psychic powers’ are faked. It's all a scam!”

“Is that so? Figures someone like you wouldn't be able to appreciate the finer arts of divination.”

“Then how about you read my fortune right now? Prove your skills.”

There was a short silence followed by the shuffling of some cards. “Very well. Hmm... ah... let's see here... the cards predict that you are about to receive many more angry phone calls.”

Alfred could just hear the sarcasm oozing from that voice. He decided that if this man was going to be that way, he could be snide too. “Tell me something I don't know, sweet cheeks.”

“I'm gay.”

“What?”

“What.”

The line went dead shortly after that, leaving Alfred in a stunned silence.

After another few months with no blackouts, Alfred couldn't stand it any longer. He absolutely had to meet the man behind that voice. The accent, the attitude, and the new knowledge that they had at least one thing in common was driving him insane. The guys at work only teased him after he'd confessed to falling for someone's voice alone.

With his first day off in a few weeks, Al decided that he couldn't wait any longer. He grabbed his keys and hopped into his truck, driving into town. The little shop wasn't too hard to find, seeing as it was one of the only places open on a Sunday morning out here. A little neon sign shaped like a hand with an eye on it was hanging in the window of what used to be an abandoned apartment building. At least someone is fixing it up now, though the smell from the sewer line beneath the building was as pungent as ever.

Taking a deep breath to steel himself, Alfred walked into the front room. A pleasant aroma greeted him as soon as he passed the threshold of the front door. There were a few candles lit inside of glass containers around the little waiting room. Two chairs sat against the far left wall next to a door that Alfred assumed was a bathroom or a coat closet. Even if he didn't exactly believe in this magic stuff, the atmosphere in here would really drive it home for most people.

Shelved lined the wall on his right, stocked with all manner of odd looking bottles. Lavender oil, mint oil, and many more were placed pristinely in a line. So that was what he meant by delicate mixtures in his fridge. Well that was something Alfred could believe in. His own mother used to rub lavender oil on his pillow when he woke from nightmares as a child. She said it was a special sleeping potion. It wasn't until he was older that he found out Lavender is meant to help relax you, which can put you to sleep easier.

The sound of an all to familiar voice clearing his throat caught Alfred's attention. What he saw had him short of breath himself, unable to speak.

The man across from him was about his height, with a mop of sandy blond hair and green eyes that seemed to glow in this lighting. His lithe frame was clothed in a green dress shirt and black slacks that hugged those hips in just the right way. To keep himself from staring too long, Alfred had to turn his attention back to the bottles. “Uh... “ He coughed and tried to regain his voice. “I-... um...”

“Are you here for a fortune, or do you require some oils? I would be glad to help you find what you desire.” Those green eyes met his again when Alfred turned to shake his hand. “I am Arthur Kirkland, local expert on divination and alchemy.”

“Arthur...” Alfred let go of his hand a little too quickly. “Uh, I'm Alfred. I was just comin in to-"

“To see if this is for real or not?” One of Arthur's rather impressive eyebrows rose at that. “Wait... I know that voice. You!”

Before he could say anything else, Arthur jabbed Alfred’s chest with his finger, his cheeks red, though whether it was from anger or embarrassment was anyone's guess. “You! You're that damn power worker from the phone! Calling me a fake! Come to rub it all in, have you? To degrade me?”

“Actually I--"

“Or is this about what I said? I-It was a joke, it just slipped out! If you're here to hurt me, I'll have you know I am trained in--"

“I'M HERE TO ASK YOU OUT!”

Alfred had no idea why he had even said that. It just slipped out because he was so in the moment. Shit. He should leave before this got ugly. “Sorry, I uh, I'll go...”

“Wait...” His sleeve was being held back by Arthur, who refused to meet Alfred's gaze. “I apologize, I... I shouldn't have shouted at you. T-The cards warned me that I could stand to control my temper lest I lose something important. I suppose they were right... blasted little buggers.”

“You know I still don't believe in that stuff...” Alfred began but he stopped himself, deciding instead to take Arthur's hand in his own. “How about you try to convince me over dinner tonight? I know a great place, though it's a bit of a drive to get there.”

Uncertainty shone in Arthur's eyes, but he eventually gave Alfred's hand a squeeze. “If you insist. I shall have to educate you if this is ever going to work out. You can pick me up at six, and not a minute later.”

Alfred smiled, his gaze never leaving Arthur's. Something about those eyes just drew him in. Like magic. That smirk on Arthur's lips drew his eyes as well.

“Let us hope fate keeps the power on tonight, hm?”

[ixiethepixiewrites]

I'll post my twiceperyear entry soon but a I'm just going through a lot right now.

Today I lost a friend. I loved her so much, but she's gone now and I'm just not doing great. The past few weeks of watching her get weaker and weaker have kept me in a bad place mentally. I'm trying though.

RIP Calico

[ixiethepixiewrites]

All the Magic in the World

Rating: G

Warnings: usuk

Summary: There must be more magic in this world than just fairy tales and myths.

A/N: FOR @thenarcolepticone , HAPPY BIRTH MY DEAR

Of all the kingdoms in the world, Spades was the one with the highest number of successful marriages between the royals. Whether they were lovers before being crowned, fell in love through an arranged marriage, or just became good friends without romance, the royal lineage was filled to the brim with happy, or at least satisfied couples. So when the news came that the crown Prince of Spades would be taking a Queen, all eyes were on who would be selected to take his hand. Prince Alfred had never shown much interest in anyone at all before, be they maidens or even other men. The lad just didn’t want romance, and this had most of the public taking bets with one another on what would happen should a marriage be arranged for him.

Would he fall in love at first sight, like King James the Just and his Queen, Aria of Diamonds? He could possibly just be good friends with his chosen match, much like his grandparents, King Alphonse and Queen Mellani. The third bet among the common folk, and the one that had gained the most popularity, was that Prince Alfred had a secret lover that he would reveal sometime soon, unable to accept being forced to marry another. The scandal! It was the talk of every barmaid and innkeep across the land.

Unfortunately for all their bets, the truth was more dull. Prince Alfred just wasn’t interested, plain and simple. His parents had thrown countless parties among noble and foreign folk alike, introducing him to eligible bachelorettes and bachelors from across the four kingdoms. No one had ever caught his eye, not even once. It was enough to drive his parents up a wall, the way he dismissed all of their picks with hardly a glance. It didn’t help that Alfred was always in the royal library, looking up nonsense about the age of court wizards and asking countless inane questions about why no one had a magic counselor anymore. Every time, his parents would brush off his questions with a simple ‘wizards no longer exist’ excuse.

That explanation just never felt good enough to Alfred.

It wasn’t until he was nearing the deadline that was his 18th birthday, that he stumbled upon an old map tucked away in the binding of a fairy tale book. The map gave detailed instructions on how to find an ancient wizard’s tower within the Spades Kingdom, a place where all supposed magic users in the kingdom got sent before they became a danger to the crown. At least, that was how the fable went anyway. It could be a hoax, but how was he to know unless he went to see for himself?

Under the guise of going out on a hunt, Alfred galloped away, the map tucked in his jacket. It wasn’t hard to lose his royal escorts, and the guards were all too used to his free spirit that most of them shrugged it off and decided to wait in the area. He always came back, after all, and they weren’t currently at war. Confident that he was not being followed, Alfred rode off into the woods, following this map to the letter. He had to try and be fast about this, as his guards were sure to notice he wasn’t coming back by the time the sun began to set. That gave him a solid half a day to get far enough along on this trail that they wouldn’t find him. He hoped.

This map had some cryptic writings as directions, but it wasn’t anything Alfred couldn’t decipher. He had spent a long time scouting out these woods, as well as studying maps of his Kingdom. None of the maps ever mentioned the wizard tower directly, but a lot of the landmarks from this map were definitely familiar to him. As he found the first landmark, a rock shaped like a dragon’s claw, Alfred reflected on what his parents had told him of their plans. His impending marriage was weighing heavily on their minds, as well as his own. It wasn’t his fault that everyone he’d ever been shown was just so... boring! Since falling in love with and marrying a commoner wasn’t as easy as the story books made it out to be, he would likely end up having to settle for someone he would merely tolerate. Apparently, that meant a marriage of power between Spades and Clubs. There was no way in hell he would ever marry someone from that frozen waste.

Alfred had been so engrossed in his thoughts, that he’d nearly missed the second landmark. The old stone obelisk was a war memorial from hundreds of years ago, yet it still stood tall amongst the great oak trees of the Spadien forest. Of course, it was covered in moss and vines, but someone always made sure to come out here and clear the foliage away from the plaque.

‘Unto ..... we mustn’t tread, for fear of unearthing former dread.’

“Huh... it’s missing a word, I wonder who defaced it? Guess when i get back i should have someone come repair it. If anyone knows the words anymore.” Al muttered to himself as he rode on, studying the map closely.

The next landmark he had to keep an eye out for was going to be the old Spade’s palace ruins. Ancient stones of a time long long forgotten, Alfred wasn’t even sure how old they were. None of the books in the library knew either, that’s how old they were. If their own historians and researchers hadn’t found them a few years ago, it would have been almost impossible for Al to even spot them. Apparently they had been absolutely covered in assorted flora and fauna, the only visible section looking almost like the remains of a cottage. Because of how inconspicuous that arrangement of stone was, no scholars had ever even guessed that the remnants of an old palace had been in the area.

The camp ahead told Alfred all he needed to know. It seemed that a lot of scholars remained in the area to continue their studies. There was so much to discover, and one report he’d read mentioned that not even half of the ruins were even uncovered yet. Some speculated that they stretched across much of the forest itself, buried partly underground. It was all so fascinating to Alfred, but his parents never let him come out to see the dig sites. If only he’d been born with the option to become a scholar instead of a Prince.

Slipping past the campsite as quietly as he could, Alfred made sure to refer to his map again. The location of the wizard tower wasn’t far off now. He honestly wouldn’t be surprised of the tower itself was just another section of these palace ruins, the fairytale being used to fluff up the myth about it all. That sounded about right. With a sigh, Al glanced around the woods. Lush greens and vivid blues vanished into darkness in all directions. The trees out here were some of the oldest and most sacred in the kingdom, many of them as tall as the guard towers back in the city. About to turn around and give up on his search, a sparkle among the leaves to the North caught his attention. It could be another camp full of scholars, or maybe some hunters in the forest searching for game to sell the pelts of, or it could be nothing at all and he was just seeing things. None of those thoughts stopped him from pressing on to investigate it.

Before long, Alfred came upon a grove of thick bushes. That was odd, he could have sworn the path looked clear when he was further off, yet suddenly all these prickly bushes blocked the road. Since his horse refused to move forward any longer, Alfred was left with the options to either turn around, or to move forward on foot. Stubborn as he was, Al decided to press on, but not before he steeled himself for the pain of getting a bunch of thorns in his skin.

That pain never came.

As he stepped into the thorn bushes, they didn’t touch him. The plants instead dissolved away, revealing what he had been looking for all along was exactly where the map had said it was. A large tower, almost as tall as the ancient trees surrounding it, stood before him in all of it’s magical glory. Those bushes had been an illusion! A magical illusion! Magic was real and he had finally found where all of the mages in the kingdom had gone!

Aaaand they had also found him. Shit.

While Alfred had been basking in this revelation, a group of people, all with magic wands pointed at him, had managed to encircle the young prince. He was certain that they were all ready to kill him, but an elderly voice froze them all in their tracks.

“Stand down, young ones! Our guest mustn’t be harmed!” An elder wizard, the kind that all the fable and myth books had described, stepped towards Alfred with a hand extended. “A pleasure to meet you, your highness.”

“Wait, you know who I am?” Alfred questioned, surprised that even the secluded old wizards out here knew who he was.

The wizened old man shared a hearty laugh, shaking his head with the fondness of a grandfather watching his grandkids at play. “I’ve known you since you were very small, young man. I have been waiting for you to stumble upon our little safe haven for quite a while now.”

Confused, Alfred allowed the wizard to explain, listening to him intently as he spoke. “I am Bazol, the caretaker of this tower and all its occupants. From those whose parents had abandoned them for fear of their gift, to those who had sought me out of their own accord, just as you have.”

“So you’re saying that you teach some kind of wizard school here..?” Alfred tried to wrap his head around it all. “I mean, this tower is practically a city itself, a miniature kingdom within a kingdom!”

“That was the idea, when we were first banished here many years ago.” Bazil paused to cough. “All magic users would be sent here to protect the kingdom. All four major kingdoms have their own towers, all meant to keep history from repeating itself...”

That had Alfred’s mind reeling. There was no talk of magic in any history books he’d ever read, not even the oldest they had! Of course, even those were only a few hundred years old, since many library texts were apparently lost at some point. Alfred now had doubts on how true that excuse was.

“I can see that you are having trouble believing me. Your father had similar troubles when he sought me out, many years ago.” Bazil chuckled to himself, leading Alfred inside the tower. “Perhaps my own grandson would be willing to enlighten you himself. He pours over those historical texts nearly every day.”

“You have a grandson? Who likes history?” That had Alfred very intrigued indeed.

They moved into a new room, a library of sorts, with books piled high in stacks all over the place. A lot of them looked ancient, though there were a few here and there that seemed to be more recent in their printing. It was almost as if the old texts of the royal library had been moved here! That would certainly explain how they had so many, despite being secluded.

A figure in a black cloak was hunched over a book in the corner, a teacup in one hand. Tousled sandy blond hair stuck up in all directions, as if this guy had just gotten out of bed mere minutes ago. Piercing green eyes soon met with Alfred’s own blue, and he felt frozen in place almost instantly. He’d never seen eyes so beautiful in his life, so alive with knowledge and understanding of things Alfred could only dream of comprehending. They were absolutely beautiful.

Closing his book, the grandson stood and bowed. “Prince Alfred, I presume? My grandfather told me to expect you at some point in the future, though he enjoys being cryptic and not giving exact dates, even if he knows them.”

Holy shit, that voice. Alfred struggled to think of a response, his cheeks tinted a nice pink color as his views on romance made a huge one-eighty. In the end, he only managed to stare dumbly and blurt out, “Holy Jokers, your eyebrows-”

Not much more came out of his mouth after that. It was like an invisible hand was holding his mouth shut. It took mere seconds to realize that this was the work of magic, if the wand pointed at him was any indication. Angry green eyes stared into his very soul. Beautiful.

“What was that about my eyebrows?? They are perfectly normal!” The young wizard huffed out as he crossed his arms. “My name is Arthur, if you even cared to know, and I am the resident expert on all historical texts.”

Alfred really wished that he could speak right now, eager to chat about history with someone who was so interested, just like he was. The magic Arthur had used, however, prevented him from doing much more other than offering an excited nod of his head. The action seemed to please Arthur, who beamed with pride as he began to rattle off facts about the Spadien monarchies from thousands of years ago.

At some point, Arthur’s grandfather had left them alone, and the spell eventually wore off. Not that Alfred gave a damn. He was far too preoccupied watching Arthur’s lips move and taking in all of this information that was new to him. When Arthur began nearing the last few hundred years, however, Alfred noticed some stark differences with what he had learnt in all his own studies.

“The Great War was an awful affair. My grandfather remembers it well enough, as he was just a boy when it happened, but these texts fill in any gaps in his memory with first hand accounts from countless soldiers and frontline wizards-” Arthur paused for dramatic effect, “-until they were all banished! The Royals of the Four Kingdoms, as well as all of their court wizards, decided it would be best if magic was never used for war again. However, an agreement could not be adequately reached, until my grandfather’s mother came up with the idea of these mage towers.”

Alfred leaned forward, listening intently as Arthur continued the tale. “You see, no Kingdom wanted any other to still have mages living amongst the people, for fear that one may plan in secret to magically attack another. So the towers were selected and all known mages were sent into seclusion, able to freely practice magic amongst ourselves without fear or persecution.”

A frown graced those pale pink lips, Arthur running a hand through his own hair. “It has been four generations since mages were free to roam about... many of the younger members of the tower have been scheming. They want to try to take the Kingdom over, and I’m sure they aren’t the only ones thinking this way. If mages went against non-magic users in an all out war, there is no question that Spades would fall into their destructive hands.”

“What can i do to prevent that then?” Alfred finally spoke up, looking determined. “There’s no way I would ever let anything like that happen to my Kingdom, but there has to be a way to resolve this without such conflict.”

Having been listening to them from outside, Bazil stepped into the library to offer his own advice. “I propose an arranged marriage. The Prince of Spades... and the grandson of the Master Wizard.”

Arthur squaked in surprise. “Grandfather! That’s ridiculous!”

The offer had taken Alfred by surprise as well, but he soon caught on. “You’re like a miniature kingdom... this would be a marriage to unite them!”

“You catch on fast, young man. Arthur, would you be willing to marry this boy? To free us all from this tower?” Bazil placed a hand on Arthur’s shoulder, a gentle smile on his face. “You can say no if you wish.”

Expression unreadable, Arthur seemed to be mulling the offer over in his mind. The anticipation had Alfred on edge. He couldn’t help it as he blurted out, “I-I think you would make a perfect Queen!”

The room fell silent, tension building in the air between the three of them. Arthur had met Alfred’s eyes in surprise, searching his face for any hint of a lie. Face red as the binding of a freshly printed book, Alfred held his breath. He had never thought of himself ever having a romantic partner, but Arthur changed something within him. This was someone he could have endless chats with about the many books they have studied, not to mention he could do magic! If there was ever a chance of Alfred finding love, this was it.

Arthur held out a hand, almost shyly. “I suppose... there are worse things I could do with my life.”

Holy shit stick, he said yes! At least, Alfred thought that was a yes. Probably was. Maybe. Bazil seemed to think it was, which was proof enough for Al! The atmosphere of the room settled, a nervous excitement taking the place of the tension from before.

Bowing low and taking Arthur’s hand to place a kiss upon it, Alfred couldn’t help but grin.

“You’re not half bad yourself, my Queen.”

[landprince]

*slaps google drive* this bad boy can hold so many half-finished fics in it