i don't do bad sauce passes
almost home
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
JBB: An Artblog!
Love Begins
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Origami Around
$LAYYYTER
taylor price
#extradirty
Keni
ojovivo
art blog(derogatory)
🪼
One Nice Bug Per Day
Product Placement
DEAR READER
Jules of Nature
cherry valley forever
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@jaaaneways
hello dark mode users :)
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TREASURE PLANET (2002)
I just found out the offspring of a goat and sheep is called a GEEP and they’re the cutest lil shits ever I want 200 of them
A baby
VS an adult
Coool as fuck they have two sets of horns
Goats are associated with Satan and lambs are associated with God.
We have created the official half demon/angel and I’m very pleased
Limbo is just filled with these. Purgoatory if you will.
Lambo
Stop telling people in twitter that things already happened in tumblr!!! I wanna see them organize their own dashcon, dont discourage them!!!
The cartoon network cancelled a cinematic masterpiece, only for it to come back stronger and with more vine-worthy content
Batman: *lists the people who have left santa prisca without facing Bane*
Bane:
“be careful with my trees”
“I
KNOOOW”
Forager smacking Dick Grayson on the ass with a towel lives rent free in my mind 24/7
shoutout to this dude who singlehandedly encapsulated literally every amazing thing ever in one single clip
This is art
HAPPY HOPS
Fuck it,,, are you the Mai or the Ty Lee in a relationship?
pirating movies by seeing them in tumblr gifs and basing my own story around them
that's how medieval peasants were supposed to use the stained glass windows to teach themselves bible stories when church was exclusively in latin
While traveling one day Magnus started to hum a song. Surprisingly, Merle and Taako joined in. Magnus announced his surprise, as he had never before met anyone who knew that song. Merle and Taako agreed, but none could remember where they had learned it or what it was called. Later they would all realize that it was the song they heard played on their first day on Legato. Having never recorded the piece's exact composition in her journals, the song was a memory Lucretia failed to erase.
The song was “I would walk 500 miles” by the Proclaimers and you can’t tell me otherwise.
UGH FINE BUT YOU ASKED
1 - It is around 40 AD, you are the greco-babylonian Occultist Hermes Trismegistus, you read some early vedic philosophy and write some fun mystic stuff about how oftentimes things are created when opposites combine. You use a lot of imagery related to male and female organs. You have just invented what will eventually be called Hermeticism.
2 - It's 2017, someone on 4chan reads that soy products have plant estrogen in them. People are not plants and it has no effect on people, but suddenly soy products are responsible for the feminization of the western male and therefore the downfall of civilization. This is the birthplace of the transphobic epithet soyboy.
3 - If soy products are feminine, what are some products with say, plant testosterone in them? 4chan fixates on onions. Queue months worth of posts of channers chugging onion juice to own the libs.
4 - You are Jordan Peterson, you're a self help writer down on his luck. You've got an audience of angry young men who feel emasculated by the failures of late capitalism, and you've read a lot of hermetic philosophy. It's time to cache in.
5 - You create what will become the foundation of neofascist metaphysics. You take the hermetic idea of male and female energies literally, positing that all things in their essence are either inherently male or inherently female, with no in-between. This allows said young men to blame bad things on their inherent spiritual feminity, rather than say, capitalism.
6 - Hence, onions are a channel for the inherent masculine energy of the universe.
You require a blunt
I require a blunt.
The wizard Howl
(direct link)
/whispers Holy shit
lotr coming after the hobbit is so funny Tolkien was just like fuck ok I gotta think of SOMETHING. wait Ive got it. Bilbos funny invisibility ring he won in a riddle contest is evil now
I'm not one for reminiscing but
I'd trade it all for your sweet embrace
The Lovers
Johnny/V
Hi I got this fucking incredible commission from @darkmoonwriter and I can not tell you how happy I am. Go commission her you guys.
There’s a theory that early Europeans started saying “brown one” or “honey-eater” instead of “bear” to avoid summoning them, and similarly my friend has started calling Alexa “the faceless woman” because saying her true name awakens her from her slumber
English has an avoidance register used in the presence of certain respected animals, which sounds fancy until you realize it’s spelling out w-a-l-k and t-r-e-a-t in front of the dog.
Mx. Leah Velleman on twitter
Icelandic folklore requires you avoid saying the names of evil whales, otherwise you’ll draw their attention.
Yall have evil whales?
Iceland does! They are the illhveli, literally “evil whales”, and they live to kill you. They love nothing more than killing and eating humans and sinking their ships. Their greatest enemy is the steypireydur (that’s blue whale to you), which is the greatest of the good whales and the protector of sailors.
All evil whales are, well, evil. So evil that if you speak their name at sea, they will hear it and home in on you. So instead you use all sorts of euphemisms for their names. Also if you try to cook their meat it literally disappears from the pot. That’s right, they’re so evil, you can’t even eat them.
They include such types as the hrosshvalur (horsewhale), with big eyes and a red mane and tail. This is probably the best known and most feared of the lot.
The raudkembingur (redcomb) is especially cruel and bloodthirsty even by illhveli standards. If you manage to escape it, it will die of frustration.
Good luck escaping the mushveli (mousewhale) though, it has legs! And will clamber onto the beach in pursuit!
Or what about death from above? The stökkull (jumper) leaps high into the air and pile-drives boats to pieces.
Meanwhile the skeljungur (shellwhale) sits in the path of boats and lets them get wrecked on its shelly hide…
… while the sverdhvalur (swordwhale) slices through boats with its dorsal fin.
The katthveli (catwhale) is relatively harmless though. It meows.
The same can’t be said of the lyngbakur (heatherback), a classic island fish that lets sailors get on its back and then dives, taking them to a watery grave.
The nauthveli (oxwhale) on the other hand specially targets cattle, attracting them into the sea with its bellow before tearing them apart.
How can you avoid all these murderous whales, like the taumafiskur (bridlefish) here? Any of a number of ways, including getting a steypireydur to help. There are substances, ranging from angelica to sheep dung and chopped fox testicles, that they find abhorrent. And you can distract them with loud noises and barrels.
For more, I assure you this link will answer all your questions.
https://abookofcreatures.com/category/illhveli/
Posts about Illhveli written by abookofcreatures
There are alot of great lines in deltarune but none beat out when ralsei gives susie advice on complimenting people by saying “just tell them something you wish people would say to you” and susie responds with “you are unbanned from free ham sandwich day”
