God I just wish I knew why Iâm so fucking unlovable

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@jagarsjora
God I just wish I knew why Iâm so fucking unlovable
I donât understand why life is so hard and why Iâm so alone. And it doesnât get better it only gets worse. People that are like oh donât kill yourself the good times will return donât realize that there were never good times. And this isnât my depression or whatever speaking. This is just plain old facts. The most pathetic part of my life is that I keep thinking itâll get better.
I canât begin to express the difference it makes just that Iâm able to wear exclusively t-shirts, baggy shorts, and flip-flops. And the thing is, right. What you notice is that Iâm wearing something slightly odd for the weather. What you donât notice is that Iâm not curled up with my hands clamped over my ears because socks make the clinking plates in the restaurant too loud.
something i've also noticed - some people get SO pissed when mentally ill people who have actual trauma from forced institutionalization and have had their issues used as an excuse to deny them basic autonomy criticize psychiatry. yes, even other mentally ill people who are supposedly against ableism. I don't give a fuck if you feel "invalidated" because I said literal children should not be heavily medicated and locked up due to what is identified as mental illness--and it's ALWAYS people who haven't experienced these things that argue with you because their personal experience wasn't bad, as if that dismisses the rampant abuse in psychiatry, especially towards people with a more stigmatized diagnosis!!
what are ur pronouns?
guess
âIn the hallway, you wonder will the world always be as narrow as this, two walls threatening to squeeze and crush you into nothingness. So you imagine other worlds, sometimes not even better, but at least different from this.â
â Saidiya Hartman, Wayward Lives, Beautiful Experiments
saw this comment on a cricket noise video and felt like something changed in me idk
[image description: a screenshot of a youtube video of a cricket, captioned "sound 1," as well as a comment by professional-mothering that reads, "my 5-year-old thought this sound was the sound stars make, so we're exploring the reality. i love his enchanting misconception though! how often in media do we hear crickets when the scene changes to night?"]
perpetually annoyed by character criticism that is just âis this character sympathetic? is this character relatable? does this character get an ending they âdeserveâ (as it correlates with their own moral goodness)?â so what if theyâre unsympathetic. so what if theyâre unrelatable. so what if they are made suffer. so what if theyâre a symbol. theyâre not real! fictional characters are tools in a story, like setting, or tropes, or tone, or style, or pacing, or medium. they are a figment, a fragment. they are not human beings, and they do not exist in a real life moral framework. this is not good analysis. ask better questions.
I'm BEGGING people to be more critical of men who make films about women and please do not give them your money cause you're curious. This is fucking awful.
lay all your love on me by abba is a church hymn to me. something holy abt it
WHEN is it MY turn to be KISSED and ADORED đ
this is literally what i think of when seeing 80% of girls/boys memes
The eradication of adobe flash dress-up games directly led to the creation of NFT's.
Sure. Iâll incorporate that into my world view
unrequited love for siblings is the saddest thing you could ever portray on its own but over the garden wall said what if the kid is like the sweetest most kindhearted five year old you could imagine and he loves his brooding wistful bitch of an older brother sooo so much and enough to offer up his life in exchange for his brothers when his older brother saw him this whole time as just an annoying step sibling at best and a nuisance at worst and you cant be too mad cause hes also a kid and then when he finally figures it all out it saves them both, the decision to leave lethargy and the rot of melancholy behind and take the love he already has as proof the world is worth it after all and aaa a a. aaaaaa. aaaaaaa. aaa. what a sweet story. what a lovely thing.