thedarksideofthemoon @jamesdeanwithoutthejew - Tumblr Blog

Tried cocaine for the first time today

Now I know the junkies smile

It cuddled me tight just like a new born child

And told me everything would be alright

I hope you're a drunken sailor

With a wandering soul

And you never find love at all

Cause he made time

Like a broken clock

Hanging on a fucked up motel

yellow cigarette stained wall

Havent thought about killing myself since last time... i don't what that says about me Igot in fight with my birth givers about cocaine tonight and left them. I'm a grown ass man they shouldn't be lying to me about their use... I lost my career as a chef due to covid and 300 applications later I'm stuck at Starbucks making a quarter of what I'm worth as a chef. I know how yo tie a noose very well but anybody got any other recommendations hmu...

#Fml #Suicide #Thoughts?

As sure as the wind keeps blowing

Nothing's gunna heal these scars

It's strange how

Everytime my mind wanders off I get this feeling in my chest that I fucked everything up I'm doing everything wrong I'm not good enough I'm fat I'm ugly I'm going no where in life she doesn't like me how could she I'm gunna die alone I'll never find someone to care about me why am I such a piece of shit what did I do to deserve this will I ever get a break nothing ever works out the way I want it to is my life worth living The fucked up thing is it happens 20 times a day and I don't know how much longer I can hang on

Another cigarette another sick dream Getting tired of the same thing Nobody needs another empty reason For something to believe in

Well the eagle sure has landed And it's made me very sad So just go away in back of me and call me uncle dad Cause your my daughter in a sense and I get nervous when you go out side

Complain Complain Life sucks anyway Well if you talk so hard What if they took it all away Why the competition Why stress the debt Be happy with what you have Most have so much less I hope one day we realize how good it really is

I said suck the mother fucker Your biting it Shit

Wana know why I smoke weed all the time

Cause when she left me I fell in love with the high

I like to do drugs I like to smoke drugs I like to hold a cigarette Full of grass in my hand

To a drug adict

You complain that your pissing on your balls Cause your dick ain't that big But you don't think to blame it on All the heroin you did as a kid While all your friends were out becoming men You were chillin with a rubber band wrapped tight Around your hand I could think back on that time I beat your ass For showing up to my birthday dinner High on shit dozing off at the fuckin table My little sister looked me dead in the eye And I knew what she was thinking What the fuck is wrong with this guy And why the fuck would my older brother Associate himself with you Which was absolutely correct Why did I put up with you maybe because you got introduced to the shit After we were already brothers but I was thru with it If getting your assed kicked by the ones you love Don't teach you shit Well then have a nice short life With out me in it All you got left is that needle and a struggle And no support around you The best news for you Is the end of your death

Looking back on the things I did I realize you were able to make me Act like a little kid Stupid hung at heart in love But the feelings weren't mutual She just took me for a scrub Used to build her self esteem up I guess Disregarding a kind heart that could give her the best Now I Know I'm white and writing poetry is gay But my feelings need to escape some fucking way And if you think I'm a pussy or I wana be black I'll show you a racist mother fucker ready to fight But when it comes to love I can never be aggressive I treat women with respect I'd never disrespect them I guess that's why they all walk up and down me And treat me like an atm without ever loving me

Every night I pray I’ll have you here one day I’ll count the stars tonight And hope with all my might That when I close my eyes You’ll be right by my side If I could have just one request You’d be the girl whose lips I kissed All my lonely dreams

#love you

It's like ive never been so miserable in all of my life Fell in love at first site But she didn't think I was right Spent two months leading me on and using me Then kicked me to the curb and had no explanation for me I don't know where it went wrong it's probably best that it did But now I'm stuck here alone and your the only thing that's on my mind Every day is full of misery no more blue skies I told you you were my sunshine but now my sun shines gone away And I'm stuck here right love songs smoking weed all day

You will cough up crows that peck my eyes And I will do nothing but go blind but my heart it has eyes and my love it has site even though it may be a little cloudy and you will break my back for all the burdens I lay upon it but I will never blame you for the bees inside this bonnet and my lungs will grow cancer and my back it will grow achey We can live their together Or I'll live alone less happy But I'll live Unfortunately

I've been trying to move on Since you've left since you've been gone But it's so hard on me Talked to a girl In first hour Bought her a cd bought her a flower But she's a stupid cunt But I'll take anything And I'll take anyone I'll take an angry lesbian With a loaded gun I'll take a heart with syphilis And Gonorrhea too But darling I love you

How do you know when you've fallen for someone

When you think about what make you happy and her smiling face is the first thing that pops in your head

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