"Blue Annis, who was a terror to beholdācobalt skin and iron claws and like Lubia, a taste for female flesh. Lubia, at least, swallowed her prey swiftly. Annis... she took longer. Annis was like Lanthys in that regard." His throat bobbed, and he tugged back the collar of his shirt to reveal another scar: the horrific, thick one above his left pectoral. She'd spied it the other day in the training ring. "That's all that remains of it now, but Annis had shredded through my chest with those iron claws and was nearly at my heart when Azriel intervened." ā A Court of Silver Flames
A very massive thank you to @jayfeather323 for bringing Cassian and his sexy scars to life in this beautiful charcoal piece for @cassianappreciationweek
Please do not repost without credit and do not feed into AI programs.
The three males had reached the age Rhysā father liked to call āthe age of fighting and fucking.ā At least Cass and Rhys had. Even though Azriel was older, he only ever seemed to be interested in the fighting part.
It wasnāt for lack of female interest either, Azriel was all lean muscle and lethal grace. He was far prettier even than Rhys, which gained him plenty of attention. The few dates Az had been on, he had stormed back into the house hours too early and locked himself in his room. Neither Cass nor Rhys could get him to talk about it, stubborn as he was.
So, when he finally broke down and told them what was going on, they were shocked, to say the least. They were shocked, but it was Azriel, and after everything heād been through, it was a wonder they didnāt figure it out sooner.
Azriel was resistant to any kind of physical affection ā to any touch, really. Now that Cass thought about it, training (or outright brawling) was the only time Cassā skin had ever touched Azrielās.
In the years they had shared a home in Windhaven, Cass had always been affectionate with Rhys and his mother. Hugs, a clasp on the back, and friendly punches were just part of how he communicated with the only family he had ever known. He learned quickly, though, that that was not something he could do with Az.
The few times he had gone in for a hug or a friendly nudge, Az had flinched. The response pained him enough that he avoided that sort of contact with him.
The time he struck an arm out in an amused punch to Azrielās shoulder, he landed flat on his back, wings flared out awkwardly before he could even make contact.
Cass had seen Az talking to Ezraās sister, Maya, earlier that day. When he disappeared after dinner, he mentioned it to Rhys who gave him a knowing smirk.
Maya was pretty with long, dark eyelashes set against high cheekbones and softly curling black hair that fell nearly to her waist. Her pale green eyes were in stark contrast to her dark skin, and freckles dotted her nose and cheeks. She was gorgeous. He could see why Az liked her.
But only an hour after heād left, he returned, the front door slamming behind him, shadows writhing angrily. His face was as hard and emotionless as always, but the twitch of his wings and his coiling shadows gave him away. Az was wearing denim pants and a pressed black shirt, a rare change from his fighting leathers.
Cass was tired of Az angrily shutting himself away anytime he met with a female. He needed to know what was upsetting him so much. Azriel was his best friend and CassĀ hatedĀ to be shut out.
Before Az could make it through the kitchen and up the stairs, Cass launched himself in front of him, arms and wings spread wide, blocking his path.
Cass really miscalculated. The spot he threw himself into was only a few inches in front of Azriel and heā¦flinched.
All the air and determination went out of him as Azās hands came up in front of his face, mangled scars in plain view, and for probably the hundredth time, he wanted to murder Azrielās father and stepbrothers. Az wasĀ goodĀ and he deserved so much better than the hand life had dealt him.
Cass took a step back but kept his wings spread to block the way to the stairs.
āAz,ā he said. āJust tell me what happened. I care about you.āĀ I care about you.Ā They were Illyrians. Mean and brutish and good for little except fighting and fucking. But they made a pact. To be brothers. To have each otherās backs no matter what. ToĀ care.
All at once, the hard, irritated line of Azrielās shoulders fell. The tightly held fold of his wings that Cass knew still felt unnatural drooped down. His carefully blank face fell to reveal his frustration.
At this sudden change in body language, Rhys stepped closer toward them. Cass had forgotten he was standing near the window, ostensibly watching the snowflakes as they fell and collected on the ground.
āWhatās wrong, Az?ā Rhys asked in a velvet voice meant to soothe.
Azriel stepped back to slump into a chair pulled out from the kitchen table and put his head in his hands. Like he couldnāt look up at his friends. It was several long seconds before he spoke. Several long seconds in which Cassian could only hear Azās stuttered, forced breaths as he tried to calm himself.
āI donāt understand whatās wrong with me!ā The frustration in his voice panged through Cassianās chest. āNo one can justĀ touchĀ me! I freak out every time!ā
Oh. So thatās what this is about.
āWhat do you mean?ā Az looked up when Rhys spoke, revealing watery hazel eyes and a vulnerability Cass had never seen in him before. That pang in his chest sank and curdled into a protective fury. He just wanted to tug Az into his chest. To slaughter everyone who had ever hurt him.
āToday, with Maya, I went to her house. Iād talked to her a few times, and I guess she wanted to fool around when I went over today. When she reached out to hug me, I flinched! And she got this sad look in her eyes, but that wasnāt even the worst of it.ā Az just sounded so defeated. Cass could tell he was trying not to let tears fall and he hadĀ neverĀ seen Az so vulnerable. Not even when he admitted he couldnāt fly.
His words came out in a rush. āWe were fooling around, just kissing a little andā¦and I was shaking. She kept asking me if I was okay, I kept brushing her off, but myā¦my hands were shaking so bad. It was just so much, and then she was kissing me and her hand slid down, and Iā¦ā
Az dropped his gaze to the tile floor and moved his arms, so his lap was now visible.
Cassianās jaw nearly dropped at the wet spot on Azrielās thigh. He looked at Rhys, the same expression of soft surprise mirrored on his face.
āI just ran out of there. She looked at me so surprised.ā Azās gaze remained fixed on the floor.
Az had come in his pants. From barely a touch.
āAz, there are far worse things than coming in your pants. I doubt Maya even really cared.ā Rhys saved them from the silence.
Az only gave him a skeptical look.
āItās nothing to be ashamed of,ā Cass said. A half-baked plan began to form in his head. āI thinkā¦we could help you.ā
āHelp me?ā Az only sounded more skeptical.
Rhys seemed to pick up on where he was going with this. āIf youāre overly sensitive to touch, if you flinch when people get too close, you just need to get more used to it. With people you trust.ā
The doubtful stare didnāt let up.
āYou trust me, right? Trust us?ā
His gaze shuttered. āOf course, I do.ā
āThen let us help,ā Rhys said, his calm, velvet timbre doing wonders to broach the topic to Azriel.
āOkay.ā The trust in his eyes made Cass smile. āHowā¦exactlyĀ do you plan to help me?ā
āWe can start with you letting someone take care of you for once. We can get you cleaned up and then go from there.ā
Azriel nodded and his gaze flicked back and forth from Rhysās captivating violet eyes to Cassianās hazel ones.
āCan I touch you?ā Cass pitched his voice low and soft and stepped right in front of Az where he sat on the wooden chair.
He nodded, and Cass reached out slowly. He ran his fingers through the silky soft strands of Azrielās hair. He brushed away the yet unmelted flakes of snow and scratched his blunt nails lightly across his scalp. Affection swelled heavy and warm in Cassian when Azās eyes fluttered shut and he leaned ever so slightly into Cassā touch.
He trailed his hands down to grasp Azrielās scarred ones, pulling him up from the chair. He had never had so much contact with Az in his life. At least not outside of grappling in the dirt.
āCome upstairs. You can take a hot bath,ā Cass said. He knew that while Az may never admit it, he was rather fond of bubble baths ever since he had discovered them.
Rhys led the way and they all walked up the stairs to the bathing room they shared. Rhys waved a hand and the bath, at least big enough for two Illyrian warriors, filled with hot, soapy water. The male didnāt have his wings out today, which Cass thought was a good thing considering the size of the bathing room.
Sinking to his knees, Rhys held eye contact with Azriel.
He kept all his movements slow, deliberate. Rhys began to unlace Azās boots, never once breaking eye contact, telling him with his eyes and his actions exactly how he intended to help him.
Cass understood what Rhys was trying to communicate. He was heir to the Night Court. Kneeling toĀ anyoneĀ was not in his nature. Rhys communicated through action, andĀ this, this supplicating reverence begged Azriel to trust him, to allow him to take care of him, to show him that there is more to the world than pain.
As Rhys made his way to the ties of Azrielās pants, Cass unbuckled straps and undid buttons on his leathers. He gently eased the sleeves down his arms, oh so careful to avoid his wings. Cass pressed a gentle kiss to the warm, tan skin of his chest. He just couldnāt help himself.
āIs this okay?ā The soft, shuddering sigh from Azriel at the contact told him that it was, indeed, okay, but he wanted to hear him say it. Cassās gaze flicked up to Azās. His lips were parted in soft shock, as though he couldnāt believe anyone would ever touch him like this.
āItāsā¦itās good.ā His voice shook a little as he spoke and as Rhys gently removed his pants from where they were tangled around his feet, Cass pressed another soft kiss to the side of his jaw, where the barest beginnings of dark stubble tickled his cheek.
A sigh escaped Azās lips and as they made eye contact, he could see the nervousness he was trying to hide. His scarred hands shook where they were clenched at his sides and his shoulders and wings were tight with tension.
Rhys stood and pressing his hands to the sharp bones of Azrielās hips, he nudged him over to the bath.
āRelax,ā Rhys said, pressing a tender kiss to Azās shoulder. āBathe. Weāll be right here.ā
By some miracle of the hot water or of Rhysās soothing whispers, some of the tension in Az melted away as he settled into the bath. Az dunked his head, wetting his ravenās feather curls. Cass watched the water trickle down his face, the little bit of stubble filling in around his jaw, the corded muscles of his neck.
Rhys trailed feather-light fingers down his spine, and Cass watched, enraptured, at how his eyes fluttered shut, at the shiver he tried to suppress.
As Az scrubbed his body, Cass stepped forward to run shampoo through the maleās hair. His chin tipped back, and he didnāt even try to keep his eyes open this time. Az just relaxed into his touch.
Cass didnāt know how to feel. He had never seen Az thisĀ openĀ before. He was relaxed, enjoying himself, even. His shadows were settled along the stretched-out curves of his wings and pooled around his legs. He thought if they could purr, they would be doing just that. Hell, maybe they could, and he just didnāt know.
Rhys never stopped running a soothing hand down the ridges of Azās spine. Scars littered his back, another reminder of the maleās cruel past. He didnāt stop the calming motion until Az stepped from the bath, and Rhys wrapped him in a fluffy towel.
The water dripped in little rivulets from his lightly curling hair and down his face. Az always had a haunted look about him, like maybe the only thing beneath the masks he wore, beneath the cold fury, was a scared little boy still trapped in his fatherās dungeon. But now, wrapped in a cream-colored towel, water dripping from his eyelashes, his rage seemed to have melted. He looked almost innocentā¦cuteĀ even.
They followed Rhys to his room. His bed was thankfully big enough for three winged Illyrians. Cass darted to his own room to grab a change of clothes for himself and for Az before returning.
Cass handed Az a pair of underwear and a soft sleep shirt that was just a tad oversized on him. He and Rhys slept shirtless, but he knew Az preferred clothing.
As they all sat on Rhysā oversized bed, Rhys spoke, āAzriel, I want you to know that you have all the control here. You donāt have to do anything you donāt want to do. Just say the word and everything stops. If you want to slow down, if you want to do something different, all you have to do is say so, okay?ā
Az nodded, and when his too-vulnerable gaze flicked over to Cass, he said, āDo you want to do this? Do you want us to take care of you? Do you want our help withā¦this?ā Cassā questions betrayed his nerves, but he so desperately wanted Azriel to say yes. He so desperately wanted to show him the care he deserved, the care no one had ever bothered to give him before.
āIā¦I want this, but there have to be some rules.ā Az had a kind of shyness in his eyes, in his voice that Cass had never seen before, never thought heĀ wouldĀ see.
āOf course, what do you propose?ā Rhys asked.
Cass couldnāt understand how Rhys was so level-headed and calm. He wanted this, yes, but it also felt like their whole dynamic could change completely and some fear that their relationship could change forever made his hands shake just slightly, made his heart beat just a little faster in his chest.
Rhys, however, seemed entirely unruffled. His violet eyes were clear and the way he sprawled against the dark wood of the headboard was cool and confident and relaxed. Rhys was always better at hiding his emotions than Cass was, though.
āI think we should keepĀ this,ā Az motioned between the three of them, āconfined to the house. We canāt bring any of this to the training ring.ā
āI agree. Is that alright with you, Cass?ā
āYes, of course. I really donāt want to know how Devlon would feel about an arrangement like this. Anything else?ā
Az shook his head.
āStay here tonight? With me?ā Rhys asked.
Cassian nodded, but Azrielās eyes widened, full lips parted.
āIāveā¦Iāve neverā¦I,ā Az stammered.
āI know Az. Thatās part of this. You donāt have to; we can always try another night.ā Rhysā voice was low and smooth and already tinged with sleep. It was quite late, and they were all tired and still processing the dayās events.
āNo, Iā¦I want to. Iāll stay.ā
Rhys smiled, eyelids drooping slightly with his need for sleep. Cass smiled at Az, too, pride lacing his features. He knew this was a big step for Az. He knew how hard he tried to hide his nightmares, how often his past still kept him awake.
Rhys made himself comfy on one side of the oversized bed, wings still tucked away to create more space. When Az settled in the middle of the bed, Cass threaded an arm around his waist, slowly and not too tight, allowing Az to push him away if he wanted to. But he didnāt. He seemed content with the contact and Cass draped a wing over their bodies, cocooning them in warmth.
Cassian wanted to stay awake. Even as Azās breathing settled into a slow, steady rhythm, he wanted to stay awake just a little longer. To make sure he was okay, to be there if he woke up. But the steady hum of their combined breathing and the warmth enveloping them lulled him into an easy, dreamless sleep.
I wanted to finish this for @officialrhysandweek, I did. But itās like a month past Rhysand week and itās still not finished but yāall can take a look at the wip if you want.
that part in acowar where azriel says "chain me to a tree, rhys... go ahead. I'll rip it out of the ground and fly with it on my damned back" lives in my head RENT FREEEEEE !!! hottest line in all the books if u ask me
I actually have a funny story about this line. I had surgery over the summer and for some unknown reason, while I was high out of my mind on anesthesia, I kept repeating this line just over and over?? Nobody in my family had any idea what I was talking about. So when I say it lives rent-free in my head, it REALLY lives there.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 5/5
Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Feyre Archeron/Rhysand, Feyre Archeron & Rhysand
Characters: Mor - Character, Cassian, Azriel, Amren, The Inner Circle
Additional Tags: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Trauma, Canon-Typical Violence, very slightly canon-divergent, inner circle love, Rhys needs a hug, bat boy angst, Post-UtM, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Angst
Summary:
āI landed at the Night Court, right as Mor was waiting for me, and I was so frantic, soā¦unhinged, that I told her everything. I hadnāt seen her in fifty years, and my first words to her were, āsheās my mate.ā And for three monthsā¦for three months I tried to convince myself that you were better off without me.ā
Rhys' pov for the three months after he comes back from under the mountain.
I know itās been forever, but Iāve gotten really busy and been dealing with some health issues. Iām almost finished with chapter 5 of For Three Months, so with any luck Iāll get that posted tonight. Thanks for your patience, Iāve really put a lot of effort into this final chapter and I think yāall will love it.
09.24: Lord Of Nightmares: Rhysand is the most fearsome High Lord. What does he look like when he's at his meanest and scariest?
09.25: The Illyrian Warrior: Beyond being the High Lord, Rhysand's half Illyrian heritage meant he trained in the Illyrian war camps and and earned the coveted-and rare-title of Carynthian. What did this journey look like for him?
09.26: The Most Powerful High Lord: Rhysand is the most powerful High Lord Prythian has ever seen. How did he learn to control his magic? How does he grapple with that much power?
09.27: The Court Of Dreams: Despite his feared reputation, at his core, Rhysand is a dreamer. What does he dream about when he looks at the stars?
09.28: Family Man: From the family he lost, to the family he chose and the family who chose him, Rhysand's family is numerous. What does a glimpse into their life look like?
09. 29: Past times: When he's not working, Rhysand likes to have fun. What do you envision the High Lord of the Night Court gets up to in his spare time?
09.30: Free Day: The sky is the limit when you have wings (and a good imagination)!
š§āāļøšŖāØāØāØ Youāve been visited by the Wip Wizard! If you feel comfortable, gush a little about the three wips youāre most excited to work on! Then send this to another inbox to keep the magic going!
Hi anon! I love sharing what Iām working on, it gives me some accountability lol.
1. Starving, Darling
This is a Rhys/Cassian/Azriel crackfic set when the batboys are still in Windhaven. This is such an indulgent fic for me and I love their dynamic so so much. The premise is basically that our dear Azriel is touch-starved and struggles with physical affection. Cass and Rhys are all too eager to help him out with this! I have a lot done for this but Iām trying to focus on finishing For Three Months, so aside from the little excerpt of it I posted, It wonāt be posted for a little while.
2. For Three Months
For Three Months is a Feysand fic from Rhysā pov set during the three months after they return from under the mountain and before he calls in the bargain. I thought it would be really interesting to see the dynamics between the Inner Circle after Rhys returns and the trauma and emotional turmoil Rhys is facing during that time. Itās pretty angsty as our favorite High Lord is dealing with a lot of self-doubt, regret, ptsd, and being separated from his mate whom he thinks hates him, and all the while he can feel her suffering through the bond. I have 4/5 chapters posted and the last one should be out by the end of this week! Poor Rhysie is losing his shit over Feyreās engagement.
3. Fanart for The Other Side of the Apocolypse by TheLonelyBarricade and Separatist_Apologist
This is a watercolor painting based on this quote from the fic: āPoised every inch like a huntress of old, with her steady hands and fearless heart. She was the very thing they used to make religions about.ā This one has taken me a very long time because I had to do a lot of research on bows, bow hunting, shooting, etc, and good reference images turned out to be rather hard to find and I ended up with around 2 dozen sketches before I even put it on watercolor paper. Then I ended up trashing the first version. On the bright side, version 2.0 Iām liking a lot more and is about half way finished. Iām a huge perfectionist when it comes to my art, and Iāve had a busy summer, but Iām really excited to post it as soon as I can!
Elain Archeron is not the wilting rose everyone believes her to be. Two years after playing her part in the war against Hybern, she has a vision of herself harnessing a power she is only beginning to understand. So perhaps a little more softly, a little more lethally, the third Archeron sister starts down the path unknown. For thereās something beginning to bloom within her- something darker, softer, and wilder than she can name, reaching for the song of the Void.
If you havenāt read āWhat Bloomed in the Dark Gardenā yet, you must. This fic is one of my favorites of all time. It is so beautifully written and the writing style holds true to the characters so well. It truly captures every intense emotion between Azriel and Elain and just makes you feel it! I am so in love with this fic, I donāt even need the next acotar book because this is it for me, this is my head canon.
Elain goes on such a journey and really comes into herself in this and Iām just so proud of her! Iām brought to tears nearly every chapter itās so beautiful. Thank you, Ehoney, for writing this because it is everything I need.
So I always thought that at some point when Azriel, Cassian, and Rhys were young, they definitely had a more intimate relationship than just friends if you get what Iām saying. And I was reading the ACOMAF bonus chapter, Wings and Embers, and now Iām pretty damn convinced. Like maybe Iām wrong but I feel like this section of it proves that they had a thing??
āHe wasnāt stupid. He knew she [Mor] and Azriel wereā¦whatever they were. Knew Azriel had been in love with Mor from the moment she strutted into the Illyrian war-camp five centuries ago. And Cassian had been jealous - of Morās shy glances at Azriel in those first few weeks, and the fact that his dearest friend and brotherā¦was looking at someone else. That sheād appeared, and then Azriel had changed. Only slightly, but Cassian had known his friend did not belong solely to him and Rhys anymore.
So when Mor had asked him to bed herā¦heād done it. A jealous, stupid prick, heād done itā¦ā
Cassian was jealous of Azrielās attraction to Mor, specifically that he was ālooking at someone else.ā I enjoy literary analysis way too much, and maybe Iām reading way too much into this, but I feel like this kinda proves my theory?
