doctor, doctor, give me the news

JEAN CLAUDE "J.C." FACILIER. Son of kind of a bad dude, but planning to do good things. 21. Pre-med at Walt U. Great at harmless magic tricks. Nothing to be afraid of, I swear.

[jcfacilier]

I heard you're bad in bed! A shame, you're so hot. :/

That’s half nice of you to say so.

[jcfacilier]

I heard that if paid enough you'll play doctor with some lucky ladies in town

Being a doctor’s not really a game.

[jcfacilier]

TEXT ✉️ KAR C.

Karmen: Precisely what I was thinking lol. And llamas sound like a nasally squeal if you ask me, like a whine. It sounds kind of funny, actually.

Karmen: You're going to be perfect at that, I can already feel it. After all, you're pretty perfect at helping out young adult women disasters like me :-P I'm sorry that you think you needed to be more. It's almost never just one person's fault, you know - it takes two.

J.C.: Mayhaps someday I'll meet one and hear it for myself. Where's the best place to go to see a llama?

J.C.: I hope so. Mistakes can hurt people real bad in that kind of business. Then I guess maybe she needed to be better at talking for me to know what she needed, but other than that she felt pretty perfect to me.

[jcfacilier]

Text 📸 OPEN

Dezi: Hello hi hola. If you got a video from me or Baz Gothel on Saturday night/Sunday morning, please delete it and don't watch it or ask questions! It's the Ring video and it's hexed so you'll actually die in 7 days if you see it. Kthxbai

J.C.: This is the first text I've gotten from you in a while, Dezi, but I must admit you made me real curious. What did you guys send?

[jcfacilier]

I heard your dad wants to punish your ex with some friends from the other side for how she treated you.

I don’t think my dad would care a whole lot about it one way or the other, even if I did think she treated me bad. Which I don’t. 

rumor has it…

[jcfacilier]

TWITTER || OPEN

@redfred: ooh, gotcha. hey, but theater has a way of making people fun. i'm sure if you decide that you wanna help out again, they'll welcome you back.

@jcfacilier: Does it seem like there's any more stuff on set that needs some help? Might be good to get outta the house for something besides soccer training after all.

[dezilier]

# for JC or whoever

JC

-what your muse’s name is in mine’s phone: 

Brother man

- what your muse’s picture is in mine’s phone

- what your muse’s ringtone is in mine’s phone

Big Brother - Kanye West

 - my muse’s last text to your muse

Dezi: Que pensez-vous que Lou voulait dire quand elle a dit qu'elle a baisé ma vie le plus ???

[jcfacilier]

TWITTER || OPEN

@redfred: Thank you! Why'd you decide not to do sets this summer?

@jcfacilier: I've just been real busy studying with the MCAT. And not a whole lotta fun lately, figured folks didn't need anyone bringing 'em down on set.

[jcfacilier]

TEXT ✉️ KAR C.

Karmen: A chumpf. That sounds like an insult lol. I'll look up a video clip, then! Have you ever heard a llama's noise? It's very strange and fun as well.

Karmen: That sounds like a really sad spiral to go down. But I don't think relationships are about being perfect for one person, are they? You need to be perfect for the rest of the world, but someone in a relationship should accept more. Maybe. I don't know, I'm no expert. I'm far from an expert, actually lol.

J.C.: I didn't think of it like that, but it does sorta look like a chump with an f. A female chump, I guess. I haven't, no, Miss Karmen. What do they sound like?

J.C.: I guess the only thing I really need to be perfect in is diagnosing kids someday and making sure I get 'em feeling better on the first try. But I guess maybe I didn't need to be perfect for her. Maybe I just needed to be better than I was.

[jcfacilier]

TWITTER || OPEN

@redfred: barely back a week and aleready kicking ass! #shrekthemusical #badassprincess

@jcfacilier: That's real great news, Miss Freddie. Congratulations. I'm not building sets this summer but I hope whoever does good work for you all.

[jcfacilier]

Rumor has it you've got a small dick

I haven’t been comparing it to stuff to know, Mister Anonymous. 

rumor has it…

[jcfacilier]

Bianca's sleeping with both of her best friends just to prove a point to Sydney

That’s real interesting for Miss Bianca, but I thought this rumor game was supposed to be rumors about the person you’re sending stuff to. Guess I’ve reached a new level of uninteresting even for me. 

rumor has it…

[jcfacilier]

TEXT ✉️ KAR C.

Karmen: That's a calming thought, actually. What do alligators sound like? If it's a describable noise, anyway, because I know indescribable noises exist. And that actually does make me feel better. You're a very calming presence, Mr. JC :-P

Karmen: You're right, thank you. And I'm sorry, my brain spirals sometimes trying to figure out everything wrong with me so I can fix it all at once and be perfect and logically I know there's no such thing, and yet I try.

J.C.: I wasn't real sure how to describe it so I asked the internet and apparently lady gators make a noise called a 'chumpf'. They say it's kinda like a cough-purr. You might need to find an audio clip to really understand. I'm real glad I can help, Miss Karmen. That's what I aim to do.

J.C.: That's okay, I understand that a whole lot. I still miss Aspen real bad somedays and try to think about what I coulda done better to make her want to stay. And that's just being perfect for one person, you wanna be perfect for everybody.

[jcfacilier]

TWITTER 🐦 LOVILIER

@senecal: idk @jcfacilier watch Nerve or Project X or something to know what to anticipate maybe??

@jcfacilier: i searched their wikipedia articles for 'injury' and 'arrest' and didn't see nothing too bad.

[jcfacilier]

Twyla

I’m real sorry, Miss Twyla, but I think I’d be too afraida doing anything else with you, so I’d have to kill you. 

Send me a name and I’ll tell you whether I’d fuck, marry, or kill them.

[jcfacilier]

TWITTER 🐦 LOVILIER

@senecal: that's actually a great idea! We could totally have an almost-medical professional on hand in case we fuck up majorly @jcfacilier. :D

@jcfacilier: @senecal in that case, happy to be of service. what kind of accidents are you anticipating, miss seneca? I wanna be real prepared.

[jcfacilier]

TEXT ✉️ KAR C.

Karmen: Thank you. In all fairness, I feel I should stress that that rate is for our water parks and falls. Outside of that, the rate is existent, but at least we don't have alligators in our castle.... although there are some rumors of them being hidden somewhere within by Yzma so who knows? That's so sad that people have lost dogs like that oh gosh. I was never a pet person but I kind of share a cat now and it makes me shudder to think of.

Karmen: I get good grades, yes, but that's only because if I didn't work to get good grades I'd feel entirely undeserving of my crown; the LEAST I could do is maintain a good GPA :-P But I appreciate the thought, I do. It's just hard not to get mad at my privilege sometimes which sounds dumb but I just hope I earn it which is of course paradoxical and whoops I'm going in circles now, stop me.

J.C.: I think you'd know if there were alligators among you, Miss Karmen. They make a real distinct noise. Well, cats don't like water so the gators don't really get them, if that makes you feel any better.

J.C.: I won't ask what that is since it's your business, Miss Karmen, but I'm sure your GPA is something to be proud of. Please stop before you upset yourself, you're a real nice person, you don't need to feel guilty.