jelly’s digital diary

Texts I’ll never send

[jellyfishsticks]

Every time I do laundry i genuinely contemplate ending my life because how tf and I gonna do this for the rest of my life

[jellyfishsticks]

You’re horrible

You stay here

In my mind

I think about you

Even though I shouldn’t

I should be happy without you

But I still think about you

I still miss you

I want to text you

I want to talk to you

I want to hear your voice

[jellyfishsticks]

[jellyfishsticks]

One day I’ll wake up

And I’ll think of you

I’ll get ready for work

And I’ll think of you

I’ll brush my teeth, and put clothes on

All while thinking about you

I’ll go to work

Still thinking of you

Every in between is filled by you

Going home, still thinking of you

Passing that road named after you

I push it down

Knowing it’s true

I’ll still be here

I’m still hoping for you

Maybe one day

Things will be different

But from what I know now

I need to resist it

-jfs

[jellyfishsticks]

I wanna be yours again

[jellyfishsticks]

I wish I could still tell you I love you

[jellyfishsticks]

[jellyfishsticks]

i just want to be boring with you

[picklemafia]

The final day cannot come quick enough. The unceasing may finally cease, and I may finally know peace.

[jellyfishsticks]

sometimes i think abt how you’ll never know this version of me, but you never really knew me at all

[jellyfishsticks]

thank you for making it known i exist outside myself and that you think of me when im not there

[jellyfishsticks]

she in a better place

because even if heaven didn’t exist

it does now just for her

[jellyfishsticks]

[jellyfishsticks]

i don’t know what love is

but i know i feel it for you

i imagine us together

when things are feeling blue

and i pray to a god

that i’ll see you soon

a god i don’t believe in

when i’m alone in my room

i stay awake at night

talking to the moon

but i only tell her the things

i know to be true

i promise you i didn’t tell her

about that night in the pool

she’d get mad

and stop shining for you

-jfs

[jellyfishsticks]

so weird you’re not just a stranger now

you’re a complete stranger

you don’t know me now

you never told me your middle name

and you’ll never know you were the last person i talked to before trying to leave

i’d text you but thats embarrassing

i know it was barely anything but i miss our something

i’ll still think of you

because for a split second you were my everything

i know you’d think i’m being dramatic

but i told you i have an anxious attachment

so i had to block you on everything

before it got too much for me

-jfs

[jellyfishsticks]

i will never get over it

[jellyfishsticks]