everybody pants now

HI! I'm Sarah, 26. When I grow up I want to be a mix of C.J. Cregg and Leslie Knope with a dash of Liz Lemon.

[elektranatchios]

You are probably going to be a very successful computer person. But you’re going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole. 

The Social Network (2010) dir. David Fincher

[deepbluedarkness]

[newtkins]

i literally never force myself to do anything thats probably my biggest problem abjzsdgdhdj

[newtkins]

me: ugh i dont want to do that

brain: dont do it then

me: can’t argue with that

[xwezi]

By Dutch-Egyptian artist Roeqiya Fris

[respectfulmemes]

[bonjaminfranklin]

Anyways everyone should watch The Good Place

[freshdonuts]

me, playing online doll makers when i could be doing literally anything else: so this is what i’d look like as a medieval monk. haha wild

[happyhamildays]

[just-shower-thoughts]

2040 is as close as 1996

[heychessikuh]

You are not welcome in my home u may now see your way out goodbye

[be-your-luve]

Q: What was going through your mind when AJ walked out in that leather harness? Antoni: Okay, well, I don’t know if you noticed this as a viewer, but he went from this shy, reserved, keeping his gaze down and not engaging in too much eye contact [kind of guy] to coming out in a harness and fully owning it and flexing his chest — umm, that was like very, you know… I’m a really reserved guy. Maybe I don’t have that sexual confidence [laughs], as much as I’d like to. It’s just not who I am! It really caught me off guard. I was not expecting him to come out in that harness!

[ingridbergman-deactivated202001]

[katherine-the-so-so]

Who knew that moms having a beach and wine day after murdering an abusive man together was my peak aesthetic.  

[itscolossal]

A Burst of Deep Sea Fireworks: A Rare Jellyfish Filmed by the E/V Nautilus

[onegianthand]

I’ve never watched Black Mirror but here’s what I imagine the show is like

[jeserodrigues]

business email glossary

thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press "send"

thanks for your interest: why'd you have to bring this up

would you be so kind: fucking do it

best: i have never physically met you

all best: this conversation is over

all my best: i wish you would die

happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox

i hope this helps: i've done all i'm willing to do

i did a bit of research: i googled it, because you're too lazy to

sorry to chase: answer my email

so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email

i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me

please contact my colleague: this isn't my problem

i'm copying in my colleague: this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it

i'll check and get back to you: i might forget to

i'll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to

can you check back with me in a week?: i'm hoping you will forget to

per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone

great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone

thanks!: i'm not mad at you

thanks!!: please don't be mad at me

thanks!!!: i'm crying at my desk

please advise: this might be your fault

kindly advise: this is entirely your fault

mind if i swing by?: i'm already in the elevator

can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email

sorry if that was unclear: i think you're an idiot

let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again

Reblogging to add a direct quote that I used today -

Please respect my work process: just do it the way I told you to and stop arguing with me, I don't care what you think

[drxgonfly]

Winter Wonderland (by Espen Haagensen)

[daantaat]

Why do you need to do this? ‘Cause it’s what I’m good at.

Ocean’s Eight (2018)