Is spanking your sexuality?
Most people define their sexuality by the gender(s) they find attractive. But our sexuality, encompassing all we find sexually attractive, is better thought of as a complex blend of desires, including our preference for dominance or submission, what we find physically attractive, and our hunger for kinky activities - such as bondage and spanking.
Our Discord community has recently been discussing how spanking fits into our overall sexuality.
I feel this is a very important question. For some, spanking is just a bit of light slap-and-tickle fun before the main event. But for many reading this blog, spanking will mean far more, because it is inextricably woven into their sexual nature. For folks like us, spanking isn’t a spicy condiment, it’s an essential ingredient for our sexual satisfaction.
For us, spanking is more than just the physical sensation of a smack on the bottom. It’s the whole theatre that accompanies it. The anticipation, the embarrassment, the powerplay, the stimulation of your mind and the arousal of your body. That is, after all, where this blog got its name.
I think a common characteristic of spankophiles is having an awareness and fascination with spanking long before we even knew what sex was.
Your sexuality is a profound part of your nature, something intrinsic that can not be denied - because it would be deeply psychologically uncomfortable to try. If someone is gay, what they find sexually attractive is far more than a preference, it’s not something they can be convinced to do without. Repressing their true desires hurts. Forcing themselves to act inauthentically hurts. Being in the closet, and missing opportunities to form new relationships hurts.
You may well have felt this awkwardness, a distress in not being able to fully explore what arouses you. Going through life thinking what means so much to you is weird and deviant, because no one really talks about it, and when they do, it’s with a sniggering dismissiveness.
Writing has always been an outlet for me, my need to acknowledge and explore long suppressed interests is why I started writing stories again, and why I decided to share them online. In doing so, I discovered thousands of others who felt just as strongly as I did. They helped me appreciate my interest wasn’t weird or creepy.
Writing and talking to others has allowed me to embrace some deep personal truths, and allowed me to understand something that’s now hugely important to me:
Spanking isn’t a preference. Spanking is my sexuality.
I now know I’ll always be fascinated by spanking. I know it is not something I’ll ever get over, or get bored of. I know the flame burns just as brightly as it ever did. It matters far more to me than vanilla sex ever did.
And I hope the stories and writings here will have helped some readers make the same journey. From painful awkwardness to contented acceptance.
You can not be truly happy until you are true to yourself.
