Untitled

ask memes for the rpc

[jigsawmemes]

𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐇𝐎𝐆 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.    a collection of one - liners taken from act two of the 2016 musical.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.   nsfw  ,   suicide ,   alcohol ,  drugs .      pt . 1

❛  is it my destiny to be just a detour on the journey of some man ?  ❜ ❛  i’ll play whatever role i’m cast in .  ❜ ❛  if you look good in tight jeans ,  that’s what they’ll want you dressed in .  ❜ ❛  once you’re known for low - cut tops ,  it’s pretty hard to stop .  ❜ ❛  i wasn’t quite aware that i was put here to be stared at .  ❜ ❛  you take what you are given ,  just to feel the love again .  ❜ ❛  i’m pretty good at being pretty .  ❜ ❛  there are worse roles you can play .  ❜ ❛  i’d rather be up dancing ,  than sad against the wall .  ❜ ❛  it’s better to be leered at than not desired at all .  ❜ ❛  who am i to dream of better ?  ❜ ❛  who am i to dream that one day i will be more than something more than just collateral in someone else’s battle ?  ❜ ❛  never give up hope .  ❜ ❛  never let yourself be defeated .  ❜ ❛  if you tried it once ,  you can try again .  ❜ ❛  a new day will follow .  ❜ ❛  the fucking roads have all been trod .  ❜ ❛  this goddamn weather will last forever .  ❜ ❛  you know the game gets hard ,  don’t throw in your cards .  ❜ ❛  i’ve tried to hard to find my way out of this mess but i’m so tired .   ❜ ❛  sometimes i just want to give up ,  and stay here ,  and live .  ❜ ❛  i’m a lot of things ,  but i’m not a quitter .  ❜ ❛  there’s always tomorrow .  ❜ ❛  you’re afraid of clowns and the end of the world .  ❜ ❛  i know everything about you .  ❜ ❛  just a day to catch my breath .  ❜ ❛  if i had my time again ,  i would do it all the same .  ❜ ❛  i would do it all the same .  ❜ ❛  i would do it all the same ,  but that’s insane .   ❜ ❛  wouldn’t you wanna make a couple of changes ?  ❜ ❛  i’ve always dreamt of learning how to dance .  ❜ ❛  some days i go out without pants .  ❜ ❛  i’d take the path less trodden ,  avoid the crap i trod in .  ❜ ❛  i’ve stolen eighteen million bucks .  ❜ ❛  i guess i’ll do it again .  ❜ ❛  i would be a lot more zen .  ❜ ❛  i would punch a lot of men .  ❜ ❛  all those dreams you left neglected ,  you’d go back and put it right .   ❜ ❛  i once masturbated seven times .  ❜ ❛  it wasn’t fun ,  but still .  ❜ ❛  i would not do it all the same ,  if i had my time again .  ❜ ❛  i would send my unsent letters .  ❜ ❛  i’ve started seven hundred fights .  ❜ ❛  if you knew the endless nights i’ve wasted getting wasted   . . .   ❜ ❛  if you knew the endless nights i’ve wasted getting wasted ,  contemplating different ways to suicide .  ❜ ❛  i have tried every food and every drink and every cheat and every choice a thousand times .  ❜ ❛  i would make a lot of friends .   ❜ ❛  i daily eat about a dozen donuts and i don’t know why .  ❜ ❛  they’re only fun because you know they’re gonna end .  ❜ ❛  when you smile you get this little crease in your nose .  ❜ ❛  if you knew how deep my shallowness goes ,  you’d be shocked .  ❜ ❛  rest assured ,  the night will come .  ❜ ❛  you gotta love life .  ❜ ❛  was it really only yesterday ?  ❜ ❛  if i had known what now i know maybe i would’ve taken a moment .  ❜ ❛  but now i’m here .   ❜ ❛  a storm rolled in and overwhelmed me sometime late this morning .  ❜ ❛  think i ignored the warning .  ❜ ❛  i’ve spent a lifetime seeking signs ,  reading lines .  ❜ ❛  well ,  that was the idea ,  but i’m here .  ❜ ❛  i thought i’d seen it all before ,  was sure by now i knew this place .   ❜ ❛  i swear that i knew every hair ,  each line upon your face .  ❜ ❛  i thought the only way to better days was through tomorrow .  ❜ ❛  i know now that i know nothing .  ❜ ❛  i'm here ,  and i’m fine .  ❜ ❛  i’m seeing you for the first time .  ❜ ❛  i thought i knew everything there was to know about men like you .   ❜ ❛  i’m here ,  and i’m fine ,  and i’m seeing you for the first time .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐇𝐎𝐆 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.    a collection of one - liners taken from act one of the 2016 musical.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.   nsfw  ,   alcohol ,  suicide ,   drugs .      pt . 2

❛  spring will arrive when the winter is done .  ❜ ❛  there will be blue skies ,  my friend ,  bright eyes and laughter .  ❜ ❛  tomorrow ,  there will be sun .  ❜ ❛  if i could ,  i’d will these clouds away ,  my love .  ❜ ❛  what could be crazier than groundhogs in february ?  ❜ ❛  this is your wake up call !  ❜ ❛  i heard they don’t even use degrees in europe !  ❜ ❛  lotta mysteries out there !  ❜ ❛  you couldn’t pay me to stay here one more night .  ❜ ❛  there’s nothing more depressing than small town ,  usa .  ❜ ❛  i admire their balls getting out of bed at all .  ❜ ❛  how can they bear it ,  to live in a place like this ?  ❜ ❛  just kill me now !  ❜ ❛  six more weeks of winter !  ❜ ❛  the bartender’s kinda hot .  ❜ ❛  they all told me he would be an asshole   . . .   and he is .   ❜ ❛  how many days is this holiday ?  ❜ ❛  i predict your unemployment .  ❜ ❛  suck my balls ,   i’m out !  ❜ ❛  i’m still sleeping ,  and this ,  i’m just dreaming it .  ❜ ❛  it’s a prank and everyone’s in on it .  ❜ ❛  when i was twenty ,  i ate magic mushrooms and thought i was aquaman .  ❜ ❛  i just need a moment ,  i just need a rest !  ❜ ❛  i’m going back to bed !   ❜ ❛  i took an online course for a week or two .  ❜ ❛  i feel like i’m trapped in a loop .  ❜ ❛  i don’t even know if i believe what i’m saying .  ❜ ❛  i don’t have a frickin’ clue what i’m doing .  ❜ ❛  start drinking at 10 ,  and by noon ,  i’m not feeling things .  ❜ ❛  nobody cares what i’m talking about .  ❜ ❛  i think i had a point there .  ❜ ❛  it’s pointless having points anyway .   ❜ ❛  nobody cares what i say .  ❜ ❛  what’s the point in bothering if no one else is bothered ?  ❜ ❛  i was born in this town ,  and i’m gonna die here too .  ❜ ❛  for whose sake am i making all this effing effort for ?  ❜ ❛  i wake up each morning in the same damn day .  ❜ ❛  i’ve got no way to change a goddamn thing .  ❜ ❛  i was taught to be pretty and precious .  ❜ ❛  i mean ,  jesus ,  it’s all pretty confusing .   ❜ ❛  it’s just better that i don’t fall for all that romantic bullshit .  ❜ ❛  i don’t mind the thought of being tossed over a shoulder and trotted off to a mansion by some ruggedly handsome man in a fireman helmet ,  and have him just use me for sex .  ❜ ❛  my prince may come ,  but it doesn’t seem likely .  ❜ ❛  even if he came ,  and he liked me ,  it’s likely  he’d be not quite my type .  ❜ ❛  i’d rather be lonely than sit on my fanny waiting for my prince to come .  ❜ ❛  his eyes would be brown .   or blue .   or green ,  well ,  i don’t care .  ❜ ❛  i’m not picky  —  i just ask that he likes me ,  and i like him .  ❜ ❛  i’d rather be alone if the only other option is to come and settle down with some condescending clown .   ❜ ❛  my prince may come but i won’t hold my breath .  ❜ ❛  it’s still in my head ,  that if i screw a frog ,  i’ll wake up in a four poster bed .  ❜ ❛  some day i will buy her a ring .  ❜ ❛  one day death will come to everyone .  ❜ ❛  one day i’ll learn how to sing !  ❜ ❛  it just doesn’t seem likely that i’m gonna get her to like me .  ❜ ❛  you brought me candies ?  ❜ ❛  can i get in your panties now ?   ❜ ❛  this is all that there is !  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐊𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐒𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐃 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.   part 2 !    a collection of one - liners taken from our discord server’s pinned messages.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.  tw for nsfw  +  mommy kink.      pt 1.

❛  just a pinch of trauma !  ❜ ❛  it’s like poetry   ...   GAY .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  stop stalking me .  ❜ ❛  i hate children except when i don’t .  ❜ ❛  legally ,   i’m appalled ,   but superficially ,   i’m impressed .  ❜ ❛  god we love to just be a number in the system .  ❜ ❛  i’m gay .  ❜ ❛  stop pushing this heterosexual agenda on me .  ❜ ❛  my favorite romcom is sonic the hedgehog  ( 2020 ) .  ❜ ❛  dumbass just got HIMSELF .  ❜ ❛  oh ,   hi mommy .  ❜ ❛  why is my existential supernatural religious horror so cute ?!  ❜ ❛  anyone who has willingly seen every saw movie is more capable of murder than the average person .  ❜ ❛  COMMUNICATE ,   FUCKER !  ❜ ❛  wow ,  you breathed !   i love you !  ❜ ❛  he’s an old man ,   he doesn’t understand technology .   ❜ ❛  you’re the only people who appreciate me for what i am :   a fucking clown .  ❜ ❛  I BARELY FUCKING GRASPED THE PLOT OF THE SHOW !  ❜ ❛  the clowning itself is not the problem .  ❜ ❛  noted :   will not clown again .  ❜ ❛  that’s a waste of a  [ name ] .  ❜ ❛  i woke up forgetting  [ name ]  fucked a greek god last night .  ❜ ❛  what i would give to be  [ name ]  .   ❜ ❛  you can’t hide that shit from me .   i sniff out gays like a fucking hound dog .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  wants to break him in a good way .  ❜ ❛  i hope  [ name ]  actually gagged him .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  killed a man .  ❜ ❛  he’s a literal real life mr. krabs .  ❜ ❛  you’re always on your bullshit ,   and i love you for it .  ❜ ❛  let  [ name ]  fuck a man !  ❜ ❛  [ ship name ]  be fucking .  ❜ ❛  FUCK TWEEN YOGA ,  i’m listening to it !  ❜ ❛  i’m never doing meisner with you .  ❜ ❛  if i get to see  [ name ]  have sex with a man . . .  ❜ ❛  you need a lot of patience to deal with that family ,  which  [ name ]  clearly has .  ❜ ❛  you’re lucky that you’re so gorgeous .  ❜ ❛  no connor roy propaganda on my page .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.    a collection of one - liners taken from the 2017 short film.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary. 

❛  i’ll come to you !  ❜ ❛  my god ,  it’s been some time .  ❜ ❛  are you liking the weather ?  ❜ ❛  i was coming from a dinner thing,  so ...  ❜ ❛  can i walk you ?  ❜ ❛  i'd prefer a piggyback ride .  ❜ ❛  that was a pretty EPIC party .  ❜ ❛  let’s talk about the weather some more .  ❜ ❛  we don’t have to think about the last time you shut the door .  ❜ ❛  it’s crazy not to know what to say .  ❜ ❛  i used to know you in every single way .  ❜ ❛  you haven’t changed a bit .  ❜ ❛  maybe you’ve changed ,   a little .  ❜ ❛  i haven’t seen you in like ,   three years .  ❜ ❛  i’ve had probably a dozen haircuts .  ❜ ❛  it’s cute .   but it was always cute .  ❜ ❛  so ,   you’re happy .   ❜ ❛  the move sure took you long enough .  ❜ ❛  the sun is always shining !  ❜ ❛  the traffic ,   man   —   it gets rough .  ❜ ❛  we don’t have to think about that time we needed more .  ❜ ❛  it’s crazy not to know where you’ve been .  ❜ ❛  i used to know you like the back of my hand .  ❜ ❛  i won’t tell you what i’m thinkin’.   ❜ ❛  if you know me like you used to ,   you already know .  ❜ ❛  i miss you .  ❜ ❛  i miss you too .  ❜ ❛  we talked about the weather enough .  ❜ ❛  we used to say it all in just a single touch .  ❜ ❛  there’s so much more of me i wish that you knew .  ❜ ❛  there’s so much more of you i wish i knew too .  ❜ ❛  did i get the names confused ?  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  has told me SO much about you !  ❜ ❛  it’s so nice to finally meet you ,   [ name ]  .  ❜ ❛  please stop humming .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐊𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐒𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐃 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.    a collection of one - liners taken from our discord server’s pinned messages.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.  tw for nsfw  +  daddy kink.

❛  NO idea what that’s about .  ❜ ❛  i can’t see you right now but i perceive you .  ❜ ❛  IT’S A FUCKING FISH !  ❜ ❛  HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A FUCKING FISH LOOKS LIKE ?  ❜ ❛  that - that sounds kind of dramatic ,  [ name ] .  ❜ ❛  i will give you whatever you want .  ❜ ❛  the song about eating pussy DOES hit different on vinyl .  ❜ ❛  i’ll dox him ,   whatever .  ❜ ❛  BRO DUDE .  ❜ ❛  the cat’s my favorite character ,   actually .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  hates  [ name ]  so bad he wants him so carnally .  ❜ ❛  I DO NOT SUPPORT AMERICA .  ❜ ❛  ok shush i’m spending my brother’s money .  ❜ ❛  okay  [ name ]  we get it ,   you’re horny .  ❜ ❛  you know ,   i’ve surprisingly thought for a while about  [ name ]  and daddy kinks .  ❜ ❛  i'm always here and never here ,   i’m schrodingers law student .   ❜ ❛  GAYBOT !  ❜ ❛  what i would give to make out with  [ name ]  .  ❜ ❛  it stands for FAILURE .  ❜ ❛  congrats ,   [ name ] .   you broke  [ name ] .  ❜ ❛  you’re ABOUT to feel fucking threatened if you don’t stop .  ❜ ❛  FUCK MY DOC .  ❜ ❛  it starts with a sex scene ,   by the way .   ❜ ❛  three dead himbos .  ❜ ❛  i think  [ name ]  and daddy would get along .  ❜ ❛  are you   ...   back in the closet ?  ❜ ❛  it pays to be the dumb one .  ❜ ❛  i’m really thinkin’ we could build a TARDIS .  ❜ ❛  you’re always on your bullshit ,   and i love you for it .  ❜ ❛  let  [ name ]  fuck a man !  ❜ ❛  you guys hate me ,   and for what ?  ❜ ❛  i don’t know what you mean ,   i’m just an ally .  ❜ ❛  shit like that only happens in ohio .  ❜ ❛  he’s an arrogant blonde white man .  ❜ ❛  FAMILY !   THERAPY !  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  routinely makes me lightheaded laughing .  ❜ ❛  your boyfriend gives me nothing .  ❜ ❛  fuck legalities .  ❜ ❛  truly ,   i took the upgraded package .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from various songs.   change pronouns as necessary.

❛  friends kiss too .  ❜ ❛  in the dark ,   it’s all the same .  ❜ ❛  i could’ve loved you better .  ❜ ❛  please don’t go .  ❜ ❛  that was the last thing on my mind .  ❜ ❛  okay ,   jump to end it all .  ❜ ❛  i never agreed to participate in this game .  ❜ ❛  i suggest that we keep this informal .  ❜ ❛  i drank myself to death to be the life of the afterparty .  ❜ ❛  does she kiss like i used to kiss you ?  ❜ ❛  would you say that you would try to love me too ?  ❜ ❛  someday you’ll be really close to me. .  ❜ ❛  show me heartbreak a thousand times .  ❜ ❛  it’s safe to say my ignorance stayed a bliss .  ❜ ❛  i want to sleep with you ,   but only in the literal sense .  ❜ ❛  i’m a sinner ,   you’re a saint .  ❜ ❛  i’ve found love in the strangest place .  ❜ ❛  before i die ,   i’d like to do something nice .  ❜ ❛  we can see where things go naturally .   ❜ ❛  say the word ,   and i’ll part the sea .  ❜ ❛  you’re all i think about when i’m alone .  ❜ ❛  i just killed off what was left of the optimist in me .  ❜ ❛  don’t make me laugh ,   i’ll choke .  ❜ ❛  just let me cry a little bit longer .  ❜ ❛  stop insisting that i’m not a lost cause .  ❜ ❛  i don’t want anybody seeing me cry .   ❜ ❛  maybe in another life ,   everything worked out fine .  ❜ ❛  you were my number one .  ❜ ❛  you don’t love your girlfriend .  ❜ ❛  you’re so goddamn young .  ❜ ❛  could you rewrite the story ?  ❜ ❛  could you rewrite the story ,   but trade all the tears ?  ❜ ❛  the world might be gone tomorrow ,   but we’re here tonight .  ❜ ❛  i'm not going anywhere .  ❜ ❛  i'm not going anywhere without you being here by my side .  ❜ ❛  make sure nobody sees you leave .  ❜ ❛  don’t call me baby .  ❜ ❛  look at this godforsaken mess that you made me .  ❜ ❛  look at this idiotic fool that you made me .  ❜ ❛  you know damn well for you i would ruin myself a million little times.  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from various songs.   change pronouns as necessary.

❛  let it be known that i can’t make it alone .  ❜ ❛  being your punchline still is something .  ❜ ❛  i’m not scared .  ❜ ❛  i’m not scared .   i’m not going nowhere .  ❜ ❛  tell me ,   do you think about me ?  ❜ ❛  i wanna kiss you standing up .  ❜ ❛  smitten’s a bad look on me .  ❜ ❛  i just want a kiss to get me through .  ❜ ❛  i was a lonely soul,  but that’s the old me .  ❜ ❛  if you’re so smart ,   tell me ,   why are you still so afraid ?  ❜ ❛  you can’t be everything you wanna be before your time .  ❜ ❛  dream on ,   but don’t imagine they’ll all come true .  ❜ ❛  it’s alright ,   you can afford to lose a day or two .  ❜ ❛  a kiss with a fist is better than none .  ❜ ❛  shut up ,   kiss me .  ❜ ❛  we could end all this pain right here .  ❜ ❛  i never wanted anything from you .  ❜ ❛  what doesn’t kill me makes me want you more .  ❜ ❛  if i bleed ,   you’ll be the last to know .   ❜ ❛  i don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you .  ❜ ❛  he got that boyish look that i like in a man .  ❜ ❛  i hate that i saw you again last night .  ❜ ❛  we can never be friends .  ❜ ❛  i'm confident when i’m with you .  ❜ ❛  when he loves me i feel like i’m floating .  ❜ ❛  when he calls me pretty i feel like i’m somebody .   ❜ ❛  you will always be my favorite form of loving .  ❜ ❛  i loved you so bad ,   i let you treat me like that .  ❜ ❛  i hope i was your favorite crime .  ❜ ❛  i defended you to all my friends .  ❜ ❛  how could i ever be so dumb ?  ❜ ❛  how could i ever be so dumb to believe i’d be the one you’d adore ?  ❜ ❛  i wanna be with you all of the time .  ❜ ❛  i wanna be loved by you every night .  ❜ ❛  i never wanted to get too close to you .  ❜ ❛  you’re gonna fall ,   but i’ll catch you .  ❜ ❛  you’re the one that brings the sun .  ❜ ❛  i can’t regret the things i don’t try .  ❜ ❛  they’ll be looking at us when we’re together .  ❜ ❛  stop waiting for a fairy tale to take you away .  ❜ ❛  dreams aren’t found ,   they’re made.  ❜ ❛  kiss her ,   you fool .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐒𝐀𝐖 𝐂𝐎𝐍 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from our discord server’s pinned messages.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.  tw for nsfw,  murder,  violence.     EXTREMELY NSFW .

❛  nothing turns me on faster than a murder tape .  ❜ ❛  perfection would free my body but keep my soul .  ❜ ❛  by the way guys ,  my ass is out .  ❜ ❛  he did not acquire a woman that MILFy without eating p word !  ❜ ❛  that’s okay it’s fine to hate women .  ❜ ❛  i like when MILFs are in things .  ❜ ❛  rules are stupid .   let her kill .  ❜ ❛  most people are so ungrateful to take the strap .   but not you .   not anymore .  ❜ ❛  well ,   [ name ] .   are you ready to be serially pegged ?  ❜ ❛  he was carameldansen !  ❜ ❛  kids ,  i have to say ,  the  —  the game play you just did was very ,  well ,  it was very .   poggers ?  ❜ ❛  yo ,  does  [ name ]  prefer getting his ass or pussy creamed ?  ❜ ❛  and there are some pussys you just can’t un - eat .  ❜ ❛  it’s premature ejaculation ,   [ name ] .   premature .   ejaculation .   PREMATURE EJACULATION .   you get it ?  ❜ ❛  i have to have as much cock as possible .  ❜ ❛  i just want him .   like .   so bad .   ❜ ❛  sorry that we like to scissor it’s not our fault .  ❜ ❛  NO NO NO PLEASE CONTINUE TO SEXUALIZE ME !  ❜ ❛  the only thing  [ name ]  is fucking right now is fucking STUPID .  ❜ ❛  he looks like he has no home and no wallet .   i like that in a man .  ❜ ❛  [ name ] ,   i’m saying this with love ,   but please seek help .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  is a piece of meat and it is feeding time at the zoo .  ❜ ❛  you’re an idiot .   i am attracted to you .   ❜ ❛  we have GOT to get  [ name ]  some reading comprehension .  ❜ ❛  i think its fine you’re horny for  [ name ] ,   the most sexless being imaginable .  ❜ ❛  the man ,   the myth ,   the monster cock .  ❜ ❛  this whole family is so fucked .  ❜ ❛  CAN’T YOU ALL BE NORMAL HORNY PEOPLE LIKE  [ NAME ] ???  ❜ ❛  every murder family has a knife lesbian ,  cop - hating malewife ,  and a doctor with a daddy kink .  ❜ ❛  let’s focus instead on the fact that  [ name ]  and  [ name ]  are just two daddy doms bullying each other .  ❜ ❛  let’s get more pegging content up in here !  ❜ ❛  boobies .  ❜ ❛  yes he does the fucking yes he does the cocking .  ❜ ❛  yeah ,  well ,  i’d sleep with him .  ❜ ❛  this is what zero sleep and zero dick does to a man .  ❜ ❛  yeah i slay maaaaaajor pussy .  ❜     ( fakes having a kid ) ❛  i could overlook a little scientology for a bisexual MILF if i’m honest .  ❜ ❛  'MD’ means ‘massive dick’ .  ❜ ❛  tonight ,  on this night ,   [ ship ]  fucked .  ❜ ❛  happy pride everyone !  ❜ ❛  well ,  boys .   i don’t think we can carameldansen our way out of this one .  ❜ ❛  [ name ] ,   if you wanna fuck that little green creature ,  it’s over .  ❜ ❛  [ name ]  please .   we HAVE to get you some dick .  ❜ ❛  you wanna orgy with the wiggles ?  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐍 𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐘𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from 2011′s the lincoln lawyer.  slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns / descriptors as necessary. 

❛  remember  :  i steered him to you .  ❜ ❛  i’ve got a soft spot for redheads .  ❜ ❛  the divorce papers called it temporary insanity .  ❜ ❛  when was the last time you were arrested ?  ❜ ❛  there are lots of lawyers .   why pick me ?  ❜ ❛  i remembered your name from the papers . . .  ❜ ❛  i love it when you’re sarcastic .  ❜ ❛  media’s already picked us up .  ❜ ❛  i’ll back my son come hell or high water .  ❜ ❛  you can stretch things out,  enjoy your freedom .  ❜ ❛  i’m not going to jail for something i didn’t do .  ❜ ❛  i’m right handed .   i’d use my right if i was going to punch someone .  ❜ ❛  i’ll tear her apart and throw her entrails into the sea .  ❜ ❛  is there anything you aren’t telling me ?  ❜ ❛  there’s no client as scary as an innocent man .  ❜ ❛  saturday’s the spongebob movie . . .   ❜ ❛  if you don’t care about your name ,   then i don’t .  ❜ ❛  you’re exceedingly beautiful .  ❜ ❛  i told you you were beautiful .   what else ?  ❜ ❛  i’m not a lawyer .   explain it to me .  ❜ ❛  how’s a guy like you sleep at night ?  ❜ ❛  what are you now ,   a lawyer ?   a clever ,   third - rate fucking lawyer with smart - ass technicalities ?  ❜ ❛  i had a knife ,   but this isn’t it !   ❜ ❛  you look like you’re in a daze .  ❜ ❛  defense attorneys will swear to anything .  ❜ ❛  let me tell my friends i’m leaving .  ❜ ❛  i’ll bet you didn’t know spongebob movies could be so much fun .  ❜ ❛  i thought you were just trying to get me into bed . . .  ❜ ❛  you can’t beat yourself up for what you didn’t know .  ❜ ❛  i can tell you anything ,   and you have to keep it secret .  ❜ ❛  you’re right about one thing :  i am a son of a bitch .  ❜ ❛  you're dying the death of a thousand razors ,   and you don’t even know it .  ❜ ❛  keep acting like you pull the strings .  ❜ ❛  i thought what you say to lawyers is private .  ❜ ❛  i'd really prefer it if i ask the questions,  and you answer them .  ❜ ❛  people talk to me .   i’m a friendly guy .  ❜ ❛  you’ve got enough reasons to be afraid of me already .  ❜ ❛  you can’t protect everybody .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from 2021′s spiral.   slightly edited for clarity.   change pronouns as necessary.  tw for  emetophobia ,  nsfw ,  violence.

❛  i want to play a game .  ❜ ❛  take a leap of faith ,  and you will live .  ❜ ❛  live or die — make your choice .  ❜ ❛  who the fuck is nicer than forrest gump ?  ❜ ❛  what if someone got killed ?  ❜ ❛  it’s too fucking hot in here for me to listen to this bullshit .  ❜ ❛  how do you take your coffee in the morning ?  ❜ ❛  i wouldn’t want to be stuck with some random kid either .  ❜ ❛  prepare to be underwhelmed .  ❜ ❛  enjoy it while it lasts .  ❜ ❛  women do not like it when you call them ‘bitches’ .  ❜ ❛  you can give a person six hundred tuesdays .   ain’t worth three saturdays .  ❜ ❛  it hurts .   goddamn it ,   it hurts .  ❜ ❛  you can ride a lot of dick before dusk .  ❜ ❛  i just found out pilates doesn’t exist !  ❜ ❛  you’re gonna be married forever .   ❜ ❛  if you’re gonna throw up ,   don’t do it on the evidence .  ❜ ❛  don’t want to fuck up my computer .  ❜ ❛  do they have a dead husband emoji ?  ❜ ❛  fuck me ?   no ,   fuck YOU !  ❜ ❛  you start paying some rent ,   you get some rights !  ❜ ❛  i don’t even look at porn that long .  ❜ ❛  don’t drain my battery watching twilight .   ❜ ❛  careful with that .   might be a dick night out .  ❜ ❛  fuck you very much .  ❜ ❛  salvation was offered ,   but it was declined .  ❜ ❛  somebody’s out there pulling all the strings .  ❜ ❛  that’s some tough love .  ❜ ❛  the glass and the bottle can kill .  ❜ ❛  maybe it’s a good thing they made us partners .  ❜ ❛  people are asking questions and i’m sick of making excuses !  ❜ ❛  you disloyal piece of shit .  ❜ ❛  i’ve been loyal to you since the first day we met .  ❜ ❛  you thought i’d use my real name ?  ❜ ❛  i don’t have a son .  ❜ ❛  don’t you want to hear my offer ?  ❜ ❛  do i have a choice ?  ❜ ❛  i want to be partners .  ❜ ❛  some of these motherfuckers are straight up evil .  ❜ ❛  i’ll take care of the rest .  ❜ ❛  the spiral :  symbol of change ,  evolution ,  of progress .  ❜ ❛  take a tongue here ,  few bones there ,  they’ll come around .  ❜ ❛  i want to trust you .   i do .  ❜ ❛  it’s time for your final test .  ❜ ❛  i’m not gonna let you die .  ❜ ❛  shoot this motherfucker right now .  ❜ ❛  you gonna shoot me ?   with your one bullet ?  ❜ ❛  that’s the game .  ❜ ❛  you’ve always done the right thing . . .   do it now .  ❜

[jigsawmemes]

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.     a collection of one - liners taken from various songs.   change pronouns as necessary.

❛  tell me,   do you think about me ?  ❜ ❛  i wanna kiss you standing up .  ❜ ❛  smitten’s a bad look on me .  ❜ ❛  i just want a kiss to get me through .  ❜ ❛  my love does her good .  ❜ ❛  shout out to the girl over there in my chair .  ❜ ❛  i don’t care where you’ve been .  ❜ ❛  i don’t care where you’ve been .   how many miles ,   i still love you .  ❜ ❛  show me someone who says they got no baggage ,   i’ll show you somebody who’s got no story .  ❜ ❛  nothing gory means no glory .  ❜ ❛  every single person got a couple skeletons .  ❜ ❛  my pattern with women isn’t a flattering image .  ❜ ❛  i don’t want to be the guy to hide all of my flaws .  ❜ ❛  i’ll be giving you the side of me that i don’t let show .  ❜ ❛  maybe some day i’ll find me a suspect that has no alibi .  ❜ ❛  there’s no reason to call .   ❜ ❛  sometimes i give myself the creeps .  ❜ ❛  it’s lack of sex that’s bringing me down .  ❜ ❛  sometimes my mind plays tricks on me .  ❜ ❛  i’m not a good person .  ❜ ❛  i never write ,   i never call .  ❜ ❛  i never think about anyone at all .  ❜ ❛  i’m too tired for the truth .   ❜ ❛  i’m lazy ,   i’m a coward .  ❜ ❛  i’m asleep all day in my room .  ❜ ❛  i get warm just thinking of you .  ❜ ❛  being your punchline still is something .  ❜ ❛  i’m not scared .  ❜ ❛  i’m not scared .   i’m not going nowhere .  ❜ ❛  there’s other people,  you selfish asshole .  ❜ ❛  it’s all an illusion .  ❜ ❛  art is dead .  ❜ ❛  i am an artist .  ❜ ❛  please ,   god ,   forgive me .  ❜ ❛  please don’t revere me .  ❜ ❛  please don’t respect me .  ❜ ❛  i’m just a kid .  ❜ ❛  maybe i’ll grow out of it .  ❜