Now that I'm home again (and blasting my recreation of the setlist while I write this) I can finally put together my thoughts on the Ft. Worth Ghost ritual-- and maybe wax poetic about my feelings about Ghost in general, if you'll humor me.
Before I get to the ritual itself, I need to start at the beginning. All things considered, I'm a very new Ghost fan, having only really gotten into them last December. A friend of mine suggested "Mary on a Cross" to me when I was making a playlist for a book I'm writing, and when I first heard it I was like, "Oh, yeah, I like this." I didn't think much of it after that, just listened to it when it came up on the playlist. Suddenly, in early December I felt an itch to listen to it, and it was like a switch flipped in my mind. I went from being a casual listener to putting "Mary on a Cross" on repeat for a solid week straight. Literally everyday, for hours, just "Mary on a Cross." Finally, at the end of that week, it occurred to me that if I liked this one song so much, maybe I should give the band a try in general. I spent the next week listening to their entire discography and, well, the rest is history. I became obsessed and began devouring all their music, looking into the lore, getting into the fandom.
I happened to set up Last.fm right around when my deep dive into Ghost happened, so I actually have my stats for how much I have listened to them since I found them. From December 2024 to about 5 minutes ago, this is how many Ghost songs I've listened to:
There were many, many days over these last 8 months where I was putting in 100+ Ghost songs a day, hours of listening a day. I wasn't doing it for the stats or anything, I just wanted to. It brought me such joy to listen to them. I was going through a hard time mentally/emotionally during this period as well, and it legitimately made me feel better and more stable to just listen to their music.
In April, I had fallen so in love with Ghost that I decided to get a tattoo:
I'm already thinking of getting another one, but we'll come back to that.
Not long before I got this tattoo is when I decided that I wanted to see them live. I'd watched Rite Here Rite Now and listened to the album a dozen times, and I was so enamored with the sound and energy of their live performance. They had also just announced their next tour, the Skeletour. I'd never been to a concert in my whole life, never even heard a band live unless it was an album, but I felt like I had to go. I bought a ticket completely on impulse. I'd never been interested in concerts before, but I had to hear them live.
I ended up paying for a friend to come with me so I wouldn't be alone. She'd also never been to a concert, so this was going to be a new experience for both of us. We were a little worried we wouldn't like it, but were excited to try it all the same.
Fast forward several months and the day is finally here: August 15th. I live about 4 hours from Fort Worth, so I made the drive down there day of and picked up my friend from the DFW airport. We got to Dickies Arena around 5:30 and got in line. I did a lot of people watching, scoping out all the amazing cosplays and outfits. Sadly, I was so excited to get there and get in line that I didn't think to pal around and meet people and exchange freebies, but it's okay. 6:30 rolls in and they let us into the arena. My friend and I found our seats and settled in for the wait. The arena actually felt smaller than I expected it to, and we were closer to the stage than it looked like we'd be when we chose our tickets.
Despite being phoneless for 2 hours, we were so excited about the ritual that we didn't get bored while we waited. Finally, the time came for it to begin, and the preamble of Peacefield started and Perpetua appeared on the screens to either side of the stage. Instantly, all the worries I had about attending this ritual were gone. Peacefield is tied for my third favorite Ghost song of all time, and hearing it live nearly brought me to tears. The lights, the effects, the sound. Everything about this concert was incredible. Part of me is glad that we were forced not to have our phones, because it kept me in the moment and made me experience it all with my full self, but I do wish I had pictures of the event. I'll have to make do with the official photos from the packs, I suppose.
The true highlight of the ritual, though? My favorite song, which I never suspected would be on the lineup, was. I got to hear "The Future is a Foreign Land" live, and I got to sing along with Perpetua and hundreds of other fans. I was so full of joy in that moment, I think it altered my brain chemistry.
I sang every single song of the setlist. Despite having nerve damage in my hip, I stood for the entire ritual. I even danced, which I never do in public. My throat was swollen the next day from all the screaming and singing, but it was so worth it.
A friend of mine, a long time ago, once described a Daft Punk concert he went to as a religious experience. I could never relate to the idea, I couldn't imagine feeling that way about getting to hear music live. Years later, I finally get it. I feel like part of me changed from having gotten to do this, like I am, on some core level, now a different person. I know that sounds so hyperbolic but like... it's true. In the days since the ritual, I still feel like I just left it, like I'm still basking in the euphoria of listening to that music live, of seeing the band with my own eyes, of being dazzled by the lights and the backdrops. I still hear parts of the performance echoing through my memory.
I wish I had done more while I was there, but I got to experience it, and that's what matters in the end. The second they announce their next tour, I'm buying tickets and doing this all over again.
It feels a little silly to say this, but Ghost has changed my life. I'm very thankful to have found them, to have had this experience, and I look forward to more to come.
As for that second Ghost tattoo, I'm thinking of getting something with Perpetua, either on my upper arm or my leg. That's a next year project, though.
If you read all this, thanks. If you were also at the Fort Worth ritual, let me know!