good heavens

[johnmdarling]

                    meet  john m. darling  !

                             23 — LIBRARY COORDINATOR

favorite song? imagination by belouis some

sexuality: heterosexual 

pronouns?: he/him

a natural adherent to whoever was in charge, john darling had followed in his father's steps before following peter pan. though life had been fine with his parents and his siblings, it wasn't until meeting peter and the lost boys that his longing for amusement had been fulfilled. now the lost boys were people that knew how to have fun, much more than john could have ever concocted on his own. this was a group of lifelong friends that he knew would not let him down and that he would do anything for. which was interesting because john wasn't one that found friends all that appealing, he liked to stick to himself but around the lost boys he found he could be himself and that was enough to change his mind.

there wasn't one single lost boy that he could consider his favorite, if asked, the obvious choice was peter, he was comfortable giving that answer as it was usually the same as everyone else's. but if he had been truthful from the start not only to others but to himself as well, he could've said there was a fascination with the fairy that hung around. he never could've given that opinion though, at least not without feeling like he was somehow betraying his sister for choosing her tormentor. so although there was inclination towards the blonde, any interest in her was buried deep down and never told or shown outright. they'd been friends and he was certain that's all they would be.

that was until he found himself kissing her at a party, acting as a substitute for nibs. one simple night of hooking up had taken a toll on him, he thought it couldn't be possible to have feelings for her since they were just friends. and yet, after that night he couldn't stop thinking about her. the two had grown closer over weeks that turned into months, sneaking off from the group to continue in their shared secret that their friends could never know about. that's what tink urged, at least, she advised against sharing their relationship for the sake of the group and john understood that, at the beginning. as time had gone by, he grew tired of their covert meetings and suggested they could make things public. he figured she'd needed time to think it over but anytime he brought it up, she shot him down. and there were only so many times he could hear her say no.

john knew he had to let her go because it became clear that this was mainly hurting him. no matter how serious things had gotten between him and tink in secrecy, nothing could ever come about them if the only way she could like him was through private affairs. whether it be out of the self-doubt he allowed himself to have or a genuine spark of perception when looking back, john deliberated on the thought that maybe this was a part of some joke. that his emotions were being toyed with for a year out of the satisfaction of hurting him. and subsequently, hurting his sister. he knew tink was never the biggest fan of wendy's, she even went so far as to laugh in his sister's misery, but he figured the hostility would've died out, instead it only made him that much wary of the relationship - if that was even the appropriate name for it - he had built with tink.

when confronting her about this revelation, tink couldn't seem to outright deny it. the anger he'd received from the news was what fueled his desire to leave the island. there was hesitation in leaving before because of his friends and family but he felt like he needed to start fresh elsewhere, anywhere that it wasn't possible to see anyone and have to hide the secrets which he chose to keep for the sanctity of peace. he'd chosen to never tell anyone of the year he spent chasing tink, he didn't want anyone's pity nor did he want to leave the island with a scene he wouldn't have to deal with. there was already enough tension between wendy and tink, he wasn't going to add anything onto that. and so he left the island, hoping he'd made the right choice.

the years away from his friends had shown him a lot about the real world, and of responsibilities. as much as he admired and wished he could simply goof around and shirk away his duties, stuff like hobbies and fun had to be put on a back burner. studies were important and finding a job even more so, his father had taught him that and those instructions remained in his head like a mantra he could never escape. slowly but surely, john had lost the whimsy he'd spent his childhood years curating with the lost boys. any sense of fun was no longer something that had to be pushed away but rather, the opportunities had stopped coming altogether.

at hearing the news that he could be around his family again, he jumped at the opportunity. the barrier had taken away too much time from seeing them, so it didn't take much time to consider moving back. of course, things will be different now. he will be living in his own apartment, he won't have much time to waste on adventures but he's hoping that adjusting won't take long. besides, how much could have changed within the span of 5 years?

HC’s:

wrote physical letters back home, mostly to wendy but he sent in gifts over birthdays and christmases to all the lost boys.

his everyday outfits adhere to a sensible uniform: a neutral button down, sweater vest, slacks, and loafers. if he wants to mix things up, he'll add a tie.

spends a lot of his time reading books, he likes stories but has grown less excited to experience them firsthand.

it was easy to just resign to a life with less fun because most of the fun he had with the lost boys felt like that was the pinnacle of entertainment, it was hard to imagine having more enjoyment anywhere else with anyone else.

[imatinker]

closed starter for @johnmdarling location: new years eve party

Surprisingly, ignoring the middle Darling boy at the lost boy’s christmas party had been far easier than she had expected it to be. Of course, the sight of him with his new bitch of a girlfriend had her tightening the hold of her cup every time she caught a glimpse of them - but she stayed strong. Nothing was said and no drama was made. Though that was mostly in thanks to the fact that she had her own relationship to focus on now too, a boy toy at her side that she could quickly divert her attention to each time her anger spiked. The fact that John never seemed to take more than a step or two away from the other blonde also made it far easier to resist the urge to go over and say anything to him - given that Tink absolutely refused to even acknowledge Marie’s existence in life, yet alone her presence at that particular event.

Tonight however, it wasn’t seeming like things were going to go as smoothly. She was a few drinks in, with Smee off talking to his boss and a glance around the room to find someone else to talk to had her sights landing directly on the boy she had sworn she’d spend the whole night avoiding. Before she can even think better of it or even realize what she was doing, Tink found herself making her way right over towards him. It takes a moment for her brain to catch up with her feet, and she simply stares at John for the briefest of seconds before she registers that she needs to say something. “So you’re still with her, huh? I’m surprised she’s actually letting you have a moment to yourself this time. Or should I be expecting her to jump out and attack me any second now?” Maybe she should have given it a bit more time to think of what to say, considering the first thing that came to mind wasn’t exactly the best way to start a conversation - but she really doesn’t know what else she’s supposed to say here. She’d tried being honest and open about her feelings and that got her nowhere - so it was back to her usual guarded, bitch of a self it was.

[johnmdarling]

The sight of a too familiar blonde had shown up in a room full of countless partygoers. John knew the odds of him running into Tink were a bit greater than he'd like but he thought they were working under the unspoken rule that they would stay away from each other. That's certainly how Tink had been operating so he functioned under that exact premise. There was no use in running away, if anything that would have angered her even more so his feet remain planted as she came closer. He acknowledged her with a polite smile but kept a distance between them. The corners of his mouth dropped pretty much as soon as she opened her mouth, she found such a way to make a happy feat for him sound like a jail sentence. "Marie is not going to attack you," John was quick to defend his girlfriend but even his very words sounded odd to him, they needed some adjusting. "Not unless you attack her first." That felt more accurate, to know Marie was protective over those she cared, it was a quality he adored. "But yes, I'm still with her. We celebrated our one month a few days ago," a small subconscious grin returned to his lips. "How are things with you and—I believe his name is Oliver, yes?" He cleared his throat out of the discomfort he felt when acknowledging that man, it was an odd pairing but he wouldn't bring that up when he was sure everyone else thought the same.

[lostgirlwendy]

~time skip to lost boys christmas (a month late) (oops)~

The Christmas party this year had, by some God-given miracle, come together against all odds at the lost boys' house. Wendy had gotten on edge early into the night, trying to keep the peace between many moving parts at play. Tink and her new boyfriend, apparently, were to be kept in one part of the house, while John and his new girlfriend was in another. She was a very nice girl, actually: Wendy had briefly conversed with her, and she was perfectly fine, aside from the fact that she was apparently Tink's newly branded worst enemy.

"John?" she called as she saw him pass the kitchen, poking her head out as she arranged a delicately crafted platter of assorted chips and cheese-puffs, per the boys' request. "Could you come here a second? I just need some help pouring out of these bags before I spill cheese dust everywhere." Wendy had an ulterior motive to speaking with her brother, besides the actually needed help. "I also wanted to inform you, privately, without someone else hearing," she said quietly as he joined her by the counter, "I've met Marie, and she seems like a lovely girl."

[johnmdarling]

Being alone for the first time that night, John wandered around, trying very hard to avoid being in the same room as his ex and her new boyfriend. What Tink found so enjoyable about someone all the lost boys swore to hate, he wasn't sure but it wasn't his business so he didn't meddle one bit. He'd only scratched his head when thinking about it and thankfully found a perfect distraction in his sister who needed help with the snacks. John did as his sister instructed, opening the bag of chips as he heard the good news. A relieving sigh escaped him, finding a grin forming on his face. "Isn't she just great? I was worried everything going on with the party would be too much but she is handling it perfectly. She isn't startled or too stressed, none of it seems to be scaring her away. Of course, I wish she was meeting everyone under better circumstances but I simply wanted her to meet you and Michael already. I really like her," his wide smile was not something that could be hidden nor did he want to hide it. And he was thankful that he could show off how happy Marie made him, he wasn't used to this sensation.

[michaelndarling]

In all complete honesty, Michael had never understood his older brother’s decision to leave the island for college. Being so far away from all their friends and family sounded like a living hell to him - but he had accepted it, assuming that John was going after a better program or leaving for more opportunities elsewhere. It had still hurt, thinking that the other boy’s future had meant more than the present he had with everyone around him, but he had grown to accept it. To live with his brother being gone for so long, just hoping that one day after he got whatever experience and studying he needed done out there he’d return home. But now, learning that what had actually triggered the giant move off island had just been a break-up… well, that was a much harder pill to swallow.

“I don’t care that you didn’t tell us you were dating her,” he admits, that part of the confession seeming so insignificant in comparison to the rest. There would be a separate time to discuss his relationship with the fairy that was so hellbent on making life for their sister a living hell - right now he was too focused on the fact that he had left them all behind just because of a simple breakup. “You left us, all of us - me and Wendy - just because you were upset at Tink? You really went away for years, never seeing us and only calling from time to time, just because you were mad at a girl?” John had already confirmed all of this, but it was simply too much for Michael to really fully wrap his head around. “You know… Sam broke my heart. It physically hurts me to still be near him and see him so happy with his girlfriend. But I never once even considered leaving as an option. Our friends are here, our family is here. How could you just up and leave all of that so easily?” And that was the real question of the hour, the thought that had been ringing through his head nonstop since this entire conversation started.

[johnmdarling]

-timeskip-

The knock on the door hadn't caught John by surprise, he was aware Michael and Wendy had made plans for the day. He simply wasn't expecting his brother to be ready earlier than his sister. "Good morning," he opened the door further to let Michael in while double checking his watch only to make sure the time was in accordance with his greeting. "I believe Wendy is still away at breakfast with Phil but she should be back soon." There was a caution he felt he had to keep now, scared that his past faults would take over every conversation. John had wished there wasn't some leftover tension between him and his siblings but he knew he had made mistakes and only wanted to correct them and get back to the friendship he missed so much while he was away. "I could get you some coffee or tea, if you'd like. You can wait in Wendy's room, although, I wouldn't mind the company while I finish the crossword."

[howromantic]

⋆⋆ ❤ ⋆⋆

Marie hadn't the best luck in the past when it came to boys, she'd always seemed to pick the ones incapable of emotional maturity. The girl prepared for the worst while silently hoping this one was truly different in the ways she thought. As the story started to come from his own lips and not a third party, she simply listened with her hand intertwining with his once they met at his knee. An unlikely match at first glance but Marie could melt into his touch if given the opportunity. The blonde stayed quiet while John spoke, wanting to devote the time to listening and understanding rather than jumping to conclusions. It was only when he finished his retelling that she filled the silence. "Mon Dieu, I am sorry it's come to that. I don't think it's wrong to want something real that doesn't have to hide," she exhaled giving her blonde curls a gentle shake, keeping herself from rambling. "Thank you for sharing all of that with me. I can't imagine it was easy on you either tonight but I wouldn't change it." That was when the blonde searched for his gaze but reached for it instead, her manicured hand taking his chin up so that their eyes met. Marie looked for some affirmation before removing the space between them and solidifying where she stood with a kiss. "You'll never have to worry about that, I promise I'll always be proud to have you at my side."

[johnmdarling]

-timeskip-

John could say with certainty that this was the happiest he'd ever been, it took a bit of trouble to get here but it was worth it. Under the apprehension of past relationships, there was something extremely comforting about someone who would be proud to have him by her side as much as Marie did. There was an unabashed lack of apology towards anyone that look at their relationship in confusion, it made sense to them and that was all that mattered. Well, at first, it raised John's own eyebrows at how someone as talented and charming as Marie was interested in him but eventually he was able to push away thoughts like that. She would comfort him in reassuring that he had the ability to keep her happy by just being himself.

The couple had reached another date night, which he was especially excited to attend now considering that Marie had been a bit busy with her upcoming album. She was a hard worker and dedicated to her craft, if John needed to come after the priorities of the album, he completely understood. The walk up the porch steps were filled with an elation at just the thought that he was reuniting with his girlfriend, he was practically buzzing as he rang on the Bonfamille's doorbell. John awaited outside her family's house in the hopes that she'd enjoy the small bouquet of flowers he held behind him, an act he liked to surprise her with. He held the belief that fresh flowers were appropriate to give her even if they could never quite hold as much beauty as Marie could.

[michaelndarling]

The moment that his brother had requested they speak to him alone after dinner, Michael had known something had to be up. It wasn’t normally like them to have to schedule talking to each other, even in private, so immediately his mind went searching for possible things John could need to discuss with him so seriously. At the top of the list was the subject of their sister’s boyfriend and his former internet career - which Michael could only pray wouldn’t happen. It had been hard enough admitting to Wendy that he used to watch some of the older boy’s videos, he couldn’t imagine telling his brother that fact too.

As they made their way up the stairs to their old nursery, the room still designated as Michael’s, his suspicion only grew at the continued formal way in which his brother was going about this entire conversation. “You’re welcome?” he answered in response, though it came out with far more confusion than anything else. He’s just about to ask what’s up, trying to cut to the chase of just getting to whatever discussion the other boy clearly wanted to have, only John beats him to it. Of all the possible topics he had brainstormed they may be discussing right now, a confession of a secret year long relationship had never even come close to making the list. “You… used to date Tink,” he echoes back the statement, the words feeling wrong even in his own mouth. Not even necessarily because the girl used to have a life’s mission to make their sister’s life miserable, that thought hadn’t even occurred to him yet. What was really bothering him was the simple fact that he had never known - that all this time there had been a huge secret between them and he’d been none the wiser. The complete honesty he used to think he and his siblings always shared had always felt so special to him, yet here he was finding out it had all been a lie. “You dated Tink and never told us.” This repeat held far more certainty in its tone, as if it were finally sinking in.

But then that wasn’t all. No, it hadn’t been enough to find out that John had kept this giant of a secret. Now he had to admit that the entire reason he had left the island for so long was all because of a girl. While a small part of him sympathized with the desire to run away from a relationship when it ended, Michael simply couldn’t wrap his head around how his brother would have been so easily willing to leave his whole family and friend group behind just to get away from an ex. “You left because of Tink?” he asks, needing that clarification and then realizing the question needs to be even more specific. “If you hadn’t broken up, would you have stayed? Gone to school here? Did you really leave us all behind for years just because you broke up with a girl?” He couldn’t imagine how that could possibly be true - couldn’t see how even the hardest of heartbreaks could ever make anyone willing to leave their loved ones behind… Not when he continued to stick with the lost boys even when his own heart had been shattered by Sam. The thought of putting any real amount of physical distance between himself and his friend group had never even occurred to him, not even at the peak of his pain.

[johnmdarling]

It was clear his brother was still adjusting to the news, John took it upon himself to answer his questions one at a time. "I was already applying to schools off the island, the break up only gave me an easier time on deciding where to go." His true intentions were to stay on the island, all his friends were here along with his family, the university nearby had been perfect for what he had studied. The plan simply pivoted once he broke up with Tink. "Maybe I would have stayed, but it's possible we would've been in this exact position if I had. I believe I only prolonged this situation by leaving." When it came to putting it plainly—leaving everyone behind all because of a girl—that is exactly what he did. However, his years away from the island eventually turned into more than that. They were transformative years, ones filled with lessons and maturity that he wasn't sure he would have been able to do alongside the current company they kept.

"It did start out that way, yes." John was hesitant to admit that, fully feeling the shame in an answer like that. "I regret not coming home sooner, I should have been here when they decided to place down the barrier. But I can't say I regret leaving at all." There was a lot to learn when he was away from everyone, and if he was wrong in the assumption that it was not possible to learn the same things on the island then he'd be the first to admit those wrongs. However, from where he stood, it didn't seem like leaving was going to be on his list of regrets. "Being away helped me move on and grow up. I had a life out there, too, maybe not one that was as fun as whatever happened here but I liked what I had. And I chose to come back to be with all of you as soon as I found out I could."

[lostgirlwendy]

The revelation that her brother had once been romantically linked to Tink had all but blown Wendy's mind. Not only that it had simply happened, but the thought that it had all happened behind her back, hidden from her by John, was enough to get her probably the drunkest she'd ever been at the Evans' house. She hadn't been embarrassingly intoxicated, but the wine she'd consumed on her walk with the blonde had put her on an equal playing field with everyone else at the party who had been drinking, for perhaps the first time in her life. She'd since settled in the few hours she'd been home alone, ready to confront John about what she knew when he'd arrived.

"Evening," she greeted simply as he entered, switching off the television as she braced herself to answer what was quite a loaded question. "We talked about you, actually," Wendy revealed, folding her arms over her chest as she answered honestly. "As, unbeknownst to me, she revealed that she was understandably upset at the sight of you and someone else together given that you had dated." The elephant in the room exposed, Wendy patiently paused, giving John the space to explain himself.

[johnmdarling]

His hands remained in his coat pockets, unsure of how else to act now that he was being confronted. There was no denying it, he wouldn't dare further the lies, especially when it sounds like she heard enough from Tink. That might have been what was most frustrating, that this news had come from someone else rather than from him directly. It not only destroyed the trust the siblings had in each other but he could clearly see now that had he told Wendy about this sooner, maybe her counsel would have helped him during that tough time. But he was working on the assumption that no one would ever hear about his secret, he couldn't account for Tink keeping it even though he'd kept hers. "We did," he nodded solemnly, keeping his head low.

"At the time, I didn't want to burden you or anyone with my problems so I just kept it to myself. Because if I had, it would have only created a lot of problems." John had been warned over and over by Tink during their relationship that sharing the news of them would have been shocking and confusing for the others to find out, he didn't want to imagine the news of them breaking up would have done to the friend group. "And I didn't want to leave everyone with a host of issues when I knew I wouldn't be here to try and fix it." The remorse he had for keeping things from his sister was getting to him, he had a hard time facing her now that everything was out. "I'm sorry I wasn't the one to tell you all of this beforehand, I didn't want you to learn it from anyone else."

[howromantic]

⋆⋆ ❤ ⋆⋆

The inside of her home brought some sort of comfort to a situation was anything but. He had requested tea to which she was happy to oblige yet opted for an espresso martini, wanting something a little stronger for the conversation to come. "Pour toi," the blonde announced holding out the mug for him. "And for moi." A small smile joining her words as her hands brought the glass to her lips to coat his explanation. Marie thought she knew the kind of person he was but since they had only recently started spending so much time together the girl didn't want to get her hopes up. It wouldn't have been the first time things weren't as they seemed. His first response caused a subconscious reach from Marie, her hand going to his knee in order to assure him that wasn't how the evening had been received. "No, of course you didn't or at least not to me." It wasn't where the blonde had expected the night to end but finding no fault of his when it was her who gave the invitation. The details Sharpay had provided were enough to give an idea, sure, though they weren't from either involved party. It was what John had to say that really mattered and had been the explanation she searched for. "We were friends of some sort," the girl gave her own side of the story but shook it off with a wave of her hand as it didn't matter anymore. "Seems a bit drastic to me." There was a pause before she opened up the room to the bigger picture, hoping he wouldn't feel the need to hold back from her. "How did it end? If you don't mind me asking."

[johnmdarling]

John had known this question was coming, it didn't pause him in his tracks as he took a sip from the tea she'd made him. The complexity in what happened could have been avoided, he could have kept it simple and only said that Tink had broken his heart and so he had to break up with her. However, John felt that if things were to continue with Marie then the truth was something she should know. "Things were over between her and I before I left the island. I ended it because she never wanted to publicly tell anyone about us, and I could only wait for so long in hopes that she would but that never happened." Retelling his side of the story to anyone was scary, he didn't think he would be sharing his account, much less to Marie, but it had also been a bit freeing to relieve the pressure of keeping all of this to himself. "I left the island shortly after and now that I'm back, it seems she was interested in seeing how to possibly start things over. But, I had to tell her I wasn't interested in that, I couldn't go back into a relationship with her because of how much she hurt me, and she's been upset with me ever since." His sight grazed upon her briefly, hoping he wouldn't find her pulling away or finding this all to be too much for her to handle. "To be quite honest, she's been upset with me since I left the island and for how I left things but I think seeing us together has really sealed in her hatred for me. I hadn't told her yet that I was seeing you, so us arriving together was quite a surprise for her." He couldn't tell exactly when but his hand happened to lay on top of the one she kept on his knee, subconsciously somewhere along his retelling, he wanted her comfort.

[imatinker]

~ timeskip to later in the night of john’s welcome home night ~

It was thanks to the copious amount of alcohol that she had consumed throughout the night that Tink was still seemingly thriving. Unlike when she had been rejected by Peter, where she had immediately shut down and lost it - this go around with John, however, she was putting on her best smile and faking it until she made it through the night. Or at least, that had been the plan. After walking away from her ex, she had felt determined to avoid him for the entire rest of the evening, only ever even looking his way during the conversation she’d had with his sister, trying to prove she could be better than he seemed to think she was. But then things started slowing down. Slightly was strumming his guitar with everyone else pretty much paired off to different corners of the room, and despite her best judgement as she stood next to Nibs, she found her eyes drifting back over towards the boy she had sworn to ignore.

Just one glance at him, sitting on the floor with a drink resting by his side and his book in his hand, was all it took. Like a punch to the fucking gut Tink wanted nothing more than to just be with him again. To even just simply sit by his side, working on her own studies in silence together the way they used to back all those years ago. Or to pull him up to his feet and drag him off to fuck in a dark corner somewhere upstairs where no one would bother to come find them. That was a dangerous thought to let enter her mind - for as soon as the imagine was in her head, there was no getting rid of it and the blonde without warning suddenly left her best friend behind and headed right over towards the eldest Darling boy instead. “Come on,” she instructed, holding out her hand and hoping he’d agree to the brilliant plan she had in mind. “You say you’ve moved on, that you’re done and don’t want to go back - but that’s bullshit and we both know it. And I can prove it. One fuck, hell, even just one kiss and you’ll see what I mean. This isn’t done, what we had isn’t gone just because you hoped it would be.” It was a bold and brave thing to proclaim, but not at all surprising for Tink to so openly declare. She knew it in her bones that they weren’t done, that there was still something there between them - and while he may be set in trying to pretend like there wasn’t, she was just as determined to show them that he was wrong.

[johnmdarling]

Even at the party in his honor John couldn't help but find himself sequestered in his own corner, all by himself only coupled with a book waiting for the party to run its course. There was no expectation to hear from Tink for the rest of the night after their last conversation but what she offered was just as surprising as her reappearance. He peeled himself off the floor, meeting Tink close to her line of sight or at least as close as he could get with the height difference. Although he rose, he didn't mean for it to seem like he was taking up her offer. It was one that he didn't even think was fair that she could bring up as casually as she had. The seemingly careless regard in which she'd offered didn't entice him, it only brought him to a conclusion that went against everything she'd hoped for. "Tink, that's not happening," he tried keeping his voice low and out of earshot from the rest of the partygoers. Perhaps she didn't care if anyone overheard but he certainly had. "You wouldn't be proving anything. It's not happening again because the first time around was enough for me." For someone who was usually so careful with his words, he'd recognized immediately that he had been a bit harsh but for as honest as he could be, it wasn't exactly easy to hold back.

[lostgirlwendy]

"No, John, that's called a tabloid," she reminded him, a small laugh escaping as she thought of their youngest brother reading a book of all things. Michael had never been as inclined toward the arts as either of his siblings had been, but he did enjoy television far more than either of them had, which, she supposed, could be considered an art form in and of itself. "He's six-foot-five," Wendy admitted, taking a quick rise from her seat to put her hand as high as it could possibly go above her head. "I only hit about his shoulder, if I'm lucky. You really can't miss him, which has been quite helpful at large social gatherings." It was probably the trait she'd heard most about her boyfriend when her friends had told her their sentiments of him after meeting Phil--Wendy was merely preparing John for just what he had in store. "A test?" Wendy echoed, her eyes narrowing at him playfully. "You're speaking to someone who is very fond of examinations. Whatever it is, you can consider me a passing grade, but if you really do need me to take this seriously, I will. I do think it'd be a good idea, John, for the both of us, now that I've thought of it."

[johnmdarling]

-timeskip, same night as friendsgiving-

There was an anticipated dread taking over as John made his way to his and Wendy's shared apartment. He knew he had things to answer for after it was known that his sister had talked to Tink. What exactly she knew, he was unsure of but he could tell that the years of not disclosing their relationship had come to an end. Taking just a second longer than usual to walk up the stairs and turn his keys through the lock, John knew to expect Wendy in the living room. It was the same as their parents used to do, waiting for them to come home when they were out a bit too long with the Lost Boys. He took in a deep breath entering the space he found his sister in. "I hope your evening was pleasant," He broached the conversation with comportment, something that might not have been needed but being something to help him ease into what he knew was going to be a difficult discussion. "What did you and Tink talk about on your walk together?"

[michaelndarling]

The question of how his conversation with his former situationship had gone was a bit of a loaded one, something that would have had Michael overthinking and trying to replay the entire night up to this point just to figure out how it really did go in any other circumstance. But the alcohol in his system left him feeling lighter than normal, and he found he didn’t really care enough in this exact moment to let himself stress on it. “I didn’t cry or say anything too embarrassing, like that I love him or something, so I think it went well. That’s a good thing, right?” he asked, needing confirmation from his brother on that fact before the caring came back and he found himself spiraling about all of this. If he were more sober, he would have taken note of how slow John was drinking, but as it was the simple act of taking a small sip was enough to satisfy him that he was indeed letting go and having fun again. “I’m fine. I don’t really get hangovers. And I don’t work until the dinner shift, so I have plenty of time to sleep in.” Maybe mentioning that he worked at all the next day was a bad idea, considering how seriously his brother took things like his jobs, but Michael figured it’d all be alright. He had it under control, or at least his drunken mind thought he did.

[johnmdarling]

-timeskip-

If there was one thing John knew, it was that dishonesty was never wise. He'd known that fact for his entire life, and yet, he still went ahead with keeping certain information from the people that matter most in his life for years now. However, with the renewed faith in the fact that honesty was the best policy, it was bringing him to reveal some things he'd never thought he'd speak of again. Asking specifically for time and privacy set aside so the two could talk after dinner, John had known for a bit how to approach the subject. It still worried him how Michael was to receive the news, he could only hope that it wasn't as bad as it went with Wendy but if it had, he could see why. Harboring secrets was nothing something they normally did and if his younger brother took offense to not sharing a part of his life from him, he would only accept the disappointment and try to regain his family's trust from then on.

"Thanks for meeting with me," he lightly chuckles away at the fact that he sounds like he's in some sort of formal business meeting when he was just trying to talk to his brother. "I just have something that I need to get off my chest, I've been keeping it from you for a while because I thought not talking about it was what was best for the whole situation but it just made everything complicated." Blotting away the sweat on his palms on his pants, he pushed through the nerves to deliver his news. "I used to date Tink..." He let the news hang in the air for a bit, trying to gauge some reaction before continuing. "For about a year and then I ended things and left the island because at the time it seemed to be the only solution that made sense. I didn't want to stay somewhere where she was impossible to escape and being away made it easier to move on."

[howromantic]

⋆⋆ ❤ ⋆⋆

The dinner had quickly devolved into one of more questions regarding those who left than those in attendance. That didn't mean she hadn't heard the backstory, sitting with the knot in her throat from the get-go when their host pulled her aside. For the evening she'd held her thoughts on the matter behind her teeth and smiled through the awkward air amidst the group that evening. Marie simmered on the drive home, eyes silently counting down the streetlights until it got to hers. The silence she feared was speaking the words their lips hadn't uttered. Perhaps the knowledge that she had once been connected to his ex was enough to make him want nothing to do with her. The driveway added some relief, knowing getting an answer to how he felt about the evening was inevitable once Marie had her home to run into if it wasn't what she'd hoped.

Even after the evening they experienced his manners hadn't faltered which didn't go unnoticed as the blond accepted the hand extended from outside the vehicle. "I can only dream to be as successful as Sharpay, I wouldn't have been able to do any of it without her," she gushed about the friend who had been her mentor into musical stardom. "That must've been why you fit in just as well." A small gesture made towards the discussion she hoped to continue having but he just so happened to bring it up himself. Marie exhaled the weight held in her chest for the night and rubbed a thumb against the hand she hadn't wanted to let go of just yet. "It's alright mon cher, is everything alright?" Her eyes found those she'd been avoiding on their return trip. While she expected it to be because of what she'd heard, Marie wanted to hear his side of the story before comparing notes. "That's good to hear then because I'd quite like to keep seeing you," the girl replied, sneaking a glance at the front door. "Would you like to come in? We can speak in the parlor and have a drink."

[johnmdarling]

When confronted by the question of whether everything had been alright, John took a pause. He wanted to assure her that it was fine, that the future of his friendships and possible relationship with Marie weren't in shambles after tonight. His lips parted, wanting to promise there wasn't anything to worry about but instead he withdrew, without any answer given at all. The burgeoning smile that traced his lips had to be reigned in for his own sake; He was unsure of how likely she would want to keep seeing him when he was bringing her into drama he could only wish was far behind him. John gave a nod towards the invitation, he followed suit as she guided them indoors and only requested a tea for himself. He walked along the edge of the parlor as she prepared their drinks, looking at the pieces of art and lavish furniture the family owned. Although, not much thought went behind the items he was admiring, he was too preoccupied in wondering how he was going to present his truth.

A light smile etched his face when she returned, John's attention returning now that she was back in the room. Had he any semblance of how to naturally ease into this conversation, he would go along but he could only try his best. "I made, what was supposed to be a pleasant evening, a mess, I'm afraid." A nervous chuckle let out, wishing some levity were brought to the matter but anyway he looked at it, he'd made things worse for himself on many fronts. "I'm the reason as to why Tink left so abruptly tonight. She hates me and, by association, she doesn't like you either. We just have this past that has never really ended well."

[howromantic]

⋆⋆ ❤ ⋆⋆

Most of the time her male pursuits ended in despair, the blonde having a knack for picking those that were unattainable. Whether it was settling for less than she wanted or seeing red flags as a welcome mat for love instead. Maybe that was among the reasons she'd become so bitter in her lyrics, finding words to cut through her idea of love other than embracing it. Or at least that was the case until recently, even tonight the lyrics were dancing off her tongue a little lighter than usual due to John's attendance. Since their meeting, she hadn't been able to keep him from running through her mind. Now that they were on the dancefloor the rest of the room disappeared and she almost forgot that in a matter of time, she'd be returning to the stage for them all to hear.

"Hm, well, I suppose I do love a man in uniform," Marie responded through a soft laugh. She used it as an excuse to stay close to him by adjusting the collar on his shirt so it laid flat. "Though I do think you made the right choice." It wouldn't have been quite as fitting to see Marilyn Monroe on the arm of a healthcare worker, not that she would've seen him any differently. "Merci beaucoup." Normally a compliment wouldn't cause her cheeks to warm but coming from him made her feel uniquely shy. He was educated, a boy of class, one that she wasn't sure would find her physical appearance enough to satisfy him. What she lacked in brains she made up for in dollar signs which she was certain that John at least hadn't seen her for just that. "I'll let you in on a little secret," she said lowering her voice and eyes scanning as if to make sure no one overheard. "I have another outfit for act two, I couldn't decide so I thought pourquoi pas les deux, non?" Her eyes batted up at him, happy to get to see him up close instead of through the crowd. "You'll have to tell me which is your favorite."

[johnmdarling]

-timeskip to post-friendsgiving dinner-

A turn of events had taken a simple dinner into a night filled with an unspoken tension. In a way, he'd been grateful that the most she'd done was walk away when he knew Tink's temper was capable of much worse. But a part of him wished she'd stayed for a bit, at least long enough for him to apologize for finding him with his date without notice. It seemed they were all caught by each other's presence - at least John had been, the guest list of another's party was hardly a concern of his when agreeing to attend. Tink's absence certainly filled the room with enough curiosity between partygoers, and within reason, the dramatics were quite a thing to occupy the mind. John just felt bad that Marie had been caught in the crossfire under a situation she had no was happening.

The dinner went on as well as it could have given the uncomfortable circumstances. There were things that needed to be discussed with his sister later but John felt a more pressing matter at hand that needed to be cleared up with Marie, someone he wanted to spend more time with and could only hope this incident wasn't going to ruin the possibility of that. He carefully opened the passenger door car for her once they'd arrived back at the Bonfamille house, offering a hand if she needed it but of course he was hoping she would hold it regardless. "Your friends are nice, I'm glad I got to meet them. They're all very successful, you fit right in." The polite smile he offered her was the same one he gave tonight, effective enough to express his delight, but to anyone that knew him, they'd know it was one that came a bit forced. The trail that led to her front porch was short but his worries occupied the lot of it. He hadn't been the best as resolving issues in the past, hence the very situation that got him here. It was stressful at the thought that it could drive Marie away but John was learning it was best to confront things head on. "I should be honest, my mind had been elsewhere for some parts of tonight. I hope it wasn't too much of a bother, the last thing I wanted to do was give an impression that I was disinterested."

[imatinker]

Hearing that he cared for her just as much as any of the others here should have made her feel better, logically she knew that was what he had intended the words to do - but all the sentiment did in reality was upset her even moreso. Because what the fuck did he mean that he only cared for her as much as he did any of the other lost boys? After everything that was really all they were? It seemed ridiculous to even consider, regardless of how much time had passed since they’d last actually been together. “Fuck that,” she spits, letting her anger take over for the moment despite knowing nothing good ever came from doing so. “Fuck being friends. You know we’ve never been just friends. And you know we could be more than that now too.”

Taking a step closer, her head shakes in refusal to accept any of this. For anyone else, perhaps it would have been easy to move on from what they had, but Tink was a fairy. Her feelings on everything would always be heightened far more than any humans and she has always been known for being even more emotional than the average fairy at that. It was why moving on from Peter had seemed so impossible for the vast majority of her life - because once she allowed herself to feel something, truly take it in and own it, well there was very little that could ever get her to change her mind. “Who said I ever moved on?” she asks, not liking the way he continues to just keep assuming all of these things without ever actually stopping to let her explain herself. It was exactly what had happened at the dramatic end of their relationship, but Tink would be damned if she let it continue again. “You didn’t listen to a word I had to say - you just ran away. You had no clue how I felt back then and you sure as fuck don’t know now. Our conversations were going well, but the past was never put behind me. And you know what, I don’t think it has been for you either.” It was a bold accusation to make, one that could easily blow up in her face, but it was what she hoped to be the truth.

[johnmdarling]

The last thing John wanted was to make Tink upset but maybe that was inevitable considering their past. The worst part about the starting tirade she was about to go on was her not considering the years he thought they'd spent as friends meant practically nothing to her. He knew they weren't the closest but he didn't think he was that insignificant to her before anything had transpired between them. His breath got caught at the suggestion that a relationship could still happen between them. He'd spent so much time moving away from an idea like that, John would be doing himself a disservice by accepting it now. It was too late for her to suggest that, it was about five years too late.

The worry on his friends overhearing hadn't stopped, but it didn't seem to be on the front of Tink's mind. As she took a step towards him, he took a step back. He needed the space away from her and her anger because he didn't know how to handle it now without making matters worse. When she'd gotten into such a temper, it felt like everything he could say would be something held against him. "I'm sorry for assuming, I would've thought that the time apart would've been the same for you as it was for me." He had driven home the insistence that he was past the point of wanting a relationship with her, whether it was to make it clear to Tink or himself was unclear but regardless he felt it was necessary to point out. "It wasn't my intention to keep you from saying everything you wanted but I didn't want to hear much else because I was hurt. I had every right to protect myself, I'm just sorry that affected you." He'd taken another step away from her, already bracing for impact on what he had to say next. "No, Tink, it has. I don't think I'd want to revisit what we had."

[joyyyfullll]

~timeskip to the deville halloween party~

Though Joy didn't frequent that many parties, this one in particular did feel like it held a certain extra weight to it, considering who she knew was going to be there. Not only was it being thrown by Michael's sister's boyfriend--which, to some, would seem like a convoluted connection, but Joy did happen to like Michael's sister, and wanted to meet this insanely tall boyfriend of hers--but his brother would be there, too. It meant that Joy needed to show up looking her best, hit just the right level of liquid confidence to get her to talk to John in public, and actually find the nerve to do it all. A tall task, but one that Joy had been talking herself into for about a month now.

As the elder Darling boy emerged from the kitchen and into the living room, Joy took a sip of her drink, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath before physically shaking the nerves out of her body. This was her chance: she had no idea when he was going to be scooped up by another partygoer, or when he would be heading home. So, she made a beeline for him, approaching the boy with a bright smile. "John! I thought you might be here. Actually, I was hoping you would be. I wanted to see my favorite librarian in the wild for once. Are you having fun? I got here kind of early, to keep Michael company, but I think I lost him somewhere between your sister and the rest of your friends."

[johnmdarling]

John's departure to another party wasn't set for about another half hour yet but he'd been just about ready to leave. It was hard to do much knowing he had a date to look forward to but he tried to manage the time with small talk. Nibs, being the conversationalist he was, took up a lot of that time, for which John was grateful but just needed a small break from. Moving to the living room, he hadn't expected anyone else to immediately approach him but alas, someone had. The bright new figure in front of him took him a bit by surprise but once he caught wind of who it was, John kept a friendly smile on his lips.

The blonde spoke fast and didn't leave him with much time to process everything but he believes he understood the gist of what she was saying. He paused before answering, making sure she had gotten everything she wanted out. "It's nice to see you, Joy. Yeah, the party has been pleasant so far." His head nodded along, still providing a grin that he was keeping up even if he wasn't having a great time. He was happy enough to see his friends having a good time so that was enough to smile about. "I didn't know you were here early, I guess the same friends that kept me busy are now keeping Michael busy. I'm sure there will be more people as the night goes on, did you invite any friends to come?"

[bugsnackdeville]

It was a bit of a surprise, the rejection of his drink considering he was pretty sure the Darling boy had just recently arrived at the party, but he rolled with it easily. “Oh, no problem. You’re heading out soon?” he can’t help but ask, considering the night was still so young and they were pretty much the only party that he knew was happening tonight. But who knows, maybe John had friends outside of the lost boys that he didn’t know about or maybe parties just weren’t really his scene - either way, he was going to make the most of the bit of time he did have with the other boy. Beaming at the mention of his girlfriend speaking highly of him, Phil nodded to indicate he felt similarly. “Same, man. I mean, I’ve seen pictures and stuff, but it’s not the same as finally being here in person with you, you know.” Taking a sip from the cup he’d earlier mentally declared his own, he sets the other one down on the table beside them just to free up his second hand. Not that he was really going to be doing anything with it, but he had felt a bit silly standing there double fisting the drinks while John had nothing in his own hands. “Well I hope so, it’s too early in the night for anyone to be getting messy or for any fights to have broken out yet. We’re still in the clear of all that drama, and hopefully we’ll stay that way all night.” Though with this many people here in one spot, drinking and smoking as much as they likely will be, it was highly doubtful there wouldn’t be at least a bit of drama found somewhere. “Us? Oh, no. Lil and I are usually more of a board game night type of party hosts. But our parents were out of town and someone had to throw something for the holiday - so we figured why not us?”

[johnmdarling]

For a second he considered explaining exactly why he was switching venues but John wasn't keen on giving away personal details to someone he'd just met. He nodded his head, "Yes, I would like to get out before it becomes too crowded. I hope you don't take any offense to me leaving, I'm sure the rest of the night will go on just fine without me." A similar apology had been given towards his siblings earlier in the night, but he thought it was necessary to give one out to the host as well. The fellow seemed to be as nice as everyone said he would be "I could only pray the pictures and stories do me justice, but if not, my apologies in advance. You—I'm afraid—are up against high expectations. Both literally and figuratively. I could only hear how tall you were before I had to see it for myself, and I must say I was not disappointed. However, I also hear you would've made a good Lost Boy, and that claim is not made lightly." It was too early for him to tell but if Nibs was the one saying such things then perhaps that wasn't a bad judgement. But John didn't feel so much like a Lost Boy anymore as to critique opinions so it wasn't his place to agree or disagree. "I have to thank you for that, if it weren't for you and your sister hosting, my friends would have thrown a party instead and their apartment is under no condition to host this many people."

[imatinker]

Maybe it was because the recent wound of losing Peter was still so fresh in her mind, but she couldn’t help the frown and deep sense of abandonment that filled her at John’s explanation. He had a life off of the island, one that didn’t involve her or any of their friends… and even though he came back, decided he wanted to be with them all again, that didn’t change the fact that they had been so easy to throw away. That she had been so easy to just up and leave. It left a bitter, twisting feeling in her gut at just the thought, one that was hard to ignore even as she downed the rest of her cup and tried her damned hardest to pretend like she was fine. Like she wasn’t internally spiraling. But things were so good between them right now, and they were at a party with all of their friends surrounding them - it wasn’t the time nor place to bring up any of this. So she doesn’t comment or ask any questions about what that life outside of the island had been like - instead focusing on the part of the conversation that didn’t make her want to throw her guts up and scream.

Raising an eyebrow, she forces her own smile on her face and shakes her head ever so slightly. “That’s not a question for me to answer,” she retorts honestly, raising a shoulder in a halfhearted shrug. “I was never the one with the issue.” It was true as far as Tink could see, at least her issues with him were so insignificant in comparison to the ones he so obviously held against her. She had been frustrated with the way he had refused to hear out any of her explanations, but that was it. She wasn’t the one that was so upset that she needed to pick up her life and move away, leaving everything and everyone behind. It almost hurt, the fact that he was even asking this, like she had any say on where they stood. Because he had made it distinctly clear that what she had to say or how she felt didn’t matter a damn to him. Remembering that sparked the gut twisting feeling again, and Tink suddenly no longer gave a damn where they were or who surrounded them. “My stance and feelings for you haven’t changed. So it’s all really up to you on whether we’re better now or not. Do you still hate me? Are you finally willing to listen and let me explain myself? Or should we just ignore everything and act like nothing ever happened?” Not that she was certain she could actually do that, not for the long haul at least, but that was what it seemed like John was trying to do and she needed to know just exactly where they were supposed to stand.

[johnmdarling]

Without thinking, John had promptly glanced around the room to see if anyone had heard her confession. It was an old habit he'd conditioned himself to do when they were together, one he thought he would never do again. Tink had inadvertently brought him back to that feeling of having to keep everything between them a secret. When he'd realized how easily he let himself get into that kind of headspace again, John shoulder's sunk from their perfected posture. He found it hard to believe that she, who had gotten married and divorced even if it was out of a joke, could still have feelings for him. Her feelings weren't exactly laced with the purest of intentions behind them to begin with, to say that those same feelings could have been held all these years was a bit insulting. John didn't think she'd meant for it to be mean spirited but the way he'd received her affections under a false pretense and without a watchful eye around them, it wasn't something he'd wish for himself now. He merely shook his head at her claim, thinking it might have had more to do with keeping a warm body by her every so often rather than what she chose to believe was care for him.

"I don't hate you anymore, Tink. I care for you as I do for every one of the people here." It was as genuine of a statement as he believed it was, there wasn't anything that could stop him from loving his friends. The smile he once had, dissipated; When it had left, he wasn't sure. But it was hard to retrieve it during a conversation like this. "Ignoring it isn't how I'd put it, but moving on, I think, is the best way to go about this, yeah. Was it not working out so far? Because I thought it was." There was a determination in him to move on, more than one to resolve things by dredging up the past. In his mind, there was no reason for doing that other than upsetting them both. "Our conversations were going so well. When we put our past behind us," his voice softened just in case anyone was around to hear, "it felt like how things were before. Like, back when we were friends. Things were a lot simpler then."