Johnny @johnnyj-suh - Tumblr Blog

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by the time he'd reached the resort, he felt like he'd been traveling for days. a quick visit to chicago to drop off jimmy with the grandparents before hopping on another flight to hawaii was probably not his strongest plan, but at least it was over now.

with a soft thud, the luggage finds its way to the corner before he falls face-first onto the bed. just 5 minutes and then he'd get up... just... 5...

--the sound of the hotel room door closing jolts him awake before he can reach full slumber. "i'm up!" he sits up and rubs his eyes, red and tired from the journey, before looking at minnie. "i um... there's a spa. i made--" he yawns softly "--made us a massage appointment for 1pm. then uh..." he grimaces, now reconsidering his plan. "thought we could just come back and get a nap in. take it easy the first day here. maybe do a little room service? what do you think?"

@qveenminn

johnnyj-suh

johnny: about to be johnny: daddy needs a coffee so we don't end up in jamsil by mistake johnny: meet us at the blue bottle?

tyongmoney

Quiet scoff just under his breath, pulling at his lips. If they end up in Jamsil, that's a real problem. Now easing himself off the wall, stretching once before a thumb hovers on the screen. Coffee first, of course. Typical Johnny, bearer of beans.

tyong: don't get lost without me tyong: ok i'll meet you there tyong: get my coffee ready

johnnyj-suh

johnny: don’t worry jimmy is an excellent navigator

johnny: we’re pulling up now. see you in a few. 😎😎

johnny guided the stroller into the coffee shop the way he had many mornings prior. this was his favorite way to start the morning. a cup of coffee fresh air and his little man. some days, minnie joined them, but today looked to be a boys’ day with minnie working all day.

the rapper held up a phone showing I-dle’s performance on mnet with the baby sat in his lap while they waited for taeyong to meet them.

Johnny: big man and I are on our way over finally

Johnny: someone got too distracted watching Bluey to pack the diaper bag

Johnny: I swear this is what happens whenever Minnie leaves us alone

@souljae-boy

saaanaaabby

sana had meant to answer lightly. something easy, something that would keep the rhythm of teasing exactly where it belonged. then he looks at her while licking the salt from his hand, and whatever she’d been about to say disappears completely. "depends. would i be yours?"

her fingers tighten almost imperceptibly around her glass. it’s ridiculous, honestly—how intentional something so small can feel. how the noise of the room seems to dull for half a second while her attention narrows to him and the careless confidence he wears like second skin. she takes the shot a beat later than the others, more to give herself something to do than anything else, setting the glass back down with deliberate care. “mm.” her eyes lift to him again, slower this time. “dangerous answer.”

when he mentions showing her hidden talents, she lets out a soft laugh and dips her head, as if deciding what to do with that. “is that right?” she asks, glancing at him from beneath her lashes. “and here i thought you were shy.” it’s a lie, and both of them know it. she reaches for the lime, taking her time before biting into it, then sets it aside and leans back into her seat. her posture is relaxed, but there’s a new awareness in the air now—something stretched tighter between them than it had been ten minutes ago.

her gaze flicks to his mouth once, then away. only then does she turn toward johnny, a smile touching the corner of her lips like she’s inviting him into the joke. “tell me honestly—has he always been this bold after tequila, or am i getting a special performance tonight?”

@johnnyj-suh

johnnyj-suh

johnny only has to look between them once to know exactly what kind of energy has settled over the table. it’s thicker now. warmer. the kind of tension people think they’re hiding because no one’s said anything outright.

cute

his grin grows slow and shameless as he leans back in his seat, drink loose in one hand while he watches the two of them dance around each other like they aren’t doing exactly that. “nah,” he says first, shaking his head toward sana’s question as if dismissing it outright. “this is definitely a special performance.”

he lets that sit just long enough to enjoy the way it lands before pointing lazily between them. “you two are kind of disgusting, by the way. all this eye contact, all this flirting.” he clicks his tongue. “should’ve warned me i was third-wheeling date night.”

there’s no mercy in the smile he turns on chris after that, only the fond cruelty of a friend who’s been handed perfect material. then johnny looks back to sana, brows lifting with open curiosity. “so tell me—good kisser?”

when both of them look back at him in shock, johnny mirrors their look of disbelief. “what?” he blurts, looking from one to the other. “oh come on. you really expect me to believe that you two have never--" a laugh breaks out of him before he turns back to sana, still incredulous. “look at this guy. all that talk, zero follow-through.”

then he brings his focus back to chris, grin turning wicked. “come on, bro, seriously? you outta show her what she’s been missing.” he knows that chris is too chicken to actually act on it, knows that he'll probably argue that there's nothing going on... unless...

@gnhabsirhc

qveenminn

minnie: we can leave it for rosie :) bribe her to babysit again minnie: chocolate please please please 💋

johnnyj-suh

johnny: good thinking johnny: walking in now

johnny opened the front door to the apartment with the help of his son holding the flowers he'd brought home. a brilliant move, he'd thought, given jimmy's newfound affinity for gripping onto things, but he was proven less-than-brilliant when jimmy decided to stick the flowers in his mouth. "no buddy, that's not food." he quickly slipped inside and placed the shopping bags on the counter, freeing his hands to extract the bouquet from the baby.

all clear, or so he thought. jimmy was his father's son, and did not like to be told 'no'. instantly, the baby's bottom lip began to quiver and johnny's heart sank to the pit of his stomach. "ah shit, no no no, it's okay. daddy's gonna get you something else to chew on, okay?" jimmy didn't find that answer acceptable, tears filled his eyes as disgruntled cries fell from his lips. the rapper swore some more under his breath, and he started to gently rock the infant in his arm, searching for a teething ring in the freezer with the other.

"min?" he called out, only slightly panicked. "are you home?"

gnhabsirhc

Damn, what a way to read the man for filth. "Worried she'll reject you and ruin your friendship or because you think you're not good enough?"

"Why can't it be both?" He mutters to himself as he sighs and shakes his head as he knows that his time is limited in acting like he's not being put in a situation where he has to think about what he's going to say. "What kind of honesty are you expecting me to share with her, hyung?"

'Hey, Sana, ever since that night in the studio, I've been thinking about you in ways that I shouldn't.'

A soft scoff leaves Chris as the thought runs through his mind and a hand reaches up to ruffle his messy hair. "She doesn't think about me like that, hyung. I'm not risking something good like what we have because—" he stops himself as Sana gets closer. "She deserves better than what I have to offer."

There's the detrimental state of mind coming through. Those thoughts of him not being able to fulfil what a woman wants because the one time he tried — look at what happened. He couldn't disappoint Sana like that. He couldn't put himself through that again because he'd lose so much more than himself.

He'd lose her.

Clearing his throat as Sana reaches them, Chris decides to try and distract Johnny once more with baby pictures and talking about himself. "Noona, you should see pictures of Jimmy." He takes the drinks from her, placing them down without a thought, "Hyung, show her."

@johnnyj-suh

johnnyj-suh

chris's response made him laugh out of reflex. "'both' is the worst option! come on, man. have a little faith in yourself." he glanced over at sana, adding one last remark before she got within earshot. "don't be so sure that she doesn't think of you that way. i think you'd be surprised by how good they are at hiding how they feel."

still, when sana reached the table, johnny naturally fell back into devoted-dad mode, as if they'd never left the subject. "you like kids?" he asked her, only waiting half a moment before handing over the phone with a picture of jimmy on the screen. "he's sitting up all by himself now. grabs everything that isn't nailed down and tries to put it in his mouth." he looks over at chris while sana is distracted and gives him a knowing smirk. "you know, it's my first night out in a while. let's make the most of it, yeah?" he flags down the bartender to get a bottle of tequila for the table, and no sooner does a bottle along with 3 glasses appear.

"you know, sana, you should really see how good chris is with the baby." girls love when guys are good with kids, he thinks to himself. "jimmy's very picky about who he let's hold him, but he went to chris here no problem." he pours as he talks, sliding two of the glasses toward the younger idols. "you should come meet him soon. chris can bring you by. he knows the way."

@saaanaaabby

gnhabsirhc

There's a moment, a very brief moment where Chris thinks he's managed to get Johnny to go down the rabbit hole of domestic home life and avoid talking about him. He smiles, laughing softly when he sees photos of Minnie's hair being pulled, and his heart clenches — light, but surely — imagining that he could have had that life.

When he's about to respond, about to keep Johnny on that path of showing baby pictures, the older man shifts it back to Chris.

Shit.

Fuck.

That's the question, isn't it? What is the deal?

Accepting the fact that he was caught, Chris looks over at Sana and there's a softness that makes it's way into his eyes and a small upward curve of his lips before clearing his throat. "Ah—" For the first time, in a long time, Chris doesn't have an answer. He could say that they are just friends but... are they? And Johnny wouldn't have asked if he didn't think there was a reason to.

"I don't know, man. Honestly. It's just one of those things, you know?" He shrugs, ears already burning as he tries to play it off. "She's good to be around." Sana has always been a good friend but lately, it's felt like there's been something more — underneath it all. "We flirt, we laugh, but, well. You know."

@johnnyj-suh

johnnyj-suh

johnny's smile grows before chris can even utter a word of reply. he knows that stunned silence. remembers when it would plague him whenever people asked him about minnie. how a silence could say so much, he wasn't sure. but he did know what it meant.

"hmmm," he replies, nodding and pretending to accept chris's deflection of an answer. "yeah, i know." a light chuckle leaves his lips as he watches the aussies try and fail to stop looking at sana. "so which excuse is it?" he takes a sip of drink, creating space for what he knows will be chris fumbling to cover his ass. "you're worried she'll reject you and ruin your friendship? or because you think you're not good enough?" he follows chris's eyes back to the bar where sana is now seemnigly walking back to the table.

johnny leans in close enough to whisper. "you'd be surprised how far a little bit of honesty can get you with a girl you can't stop thinking about. trust me, i speak from experience." he sits back and acts natural as sana gets closer, leaving the space for chris to decide his next move.

@gnhabsirhc

tyongmoney

tyong: i know you did tyong: heading out for a jog tyong: you're at the park?

johnnyj-suh

johnny: about to be johnny: daddy needs a coffee so we don't end up in jamsil by mistake johnny: meet us at the blue bottle?

gnhabsirhc

Chris' eyes linger on Sana, as if making sure she's safe, but the sound of Johnny's voice has his eyes shifting from the woman to his friend. He stands up, smiling as he greets his hyung, a laugh escaping him as he hears the comment. "Well, you know, sometimes I have to get out of there otherwise who knows how many songs I'll make."

There's a slight nervousness about him, like he has something to hide; he hopes Johnny didn't see him with Sana... otherwise it would raise a lot of questions that he isn't sure he's ready to answer.

"Yeah, I've been okay. Stressed a little with this new album and everything else that's been going on—" A sudden shift in the conversation, "how about you? How's Minnie and your boy? I bet he's big now." If Chris knows how to redirect a conversation, he's certainly doing that now.

@johnnyj-suh

johnnyj-suh

johnny raised an eyebrow at his response. "hey we've all been there with comebacks. the stress always gets us, and then eventually, we get to the other side of it and it's time to start preparing for the next comeback." he considered making a comment about how un-stressed chris had look just a moment ago when he was talking to sana, but he held it back. for now.

"they're great." his smile brightened at the mention of his family, already pulling his phone out to show his friend pictured he'd taken of them the other day. "little man just turned six months. he's got a good grip strength. loves to show it off in the form of grabbing hair. my poor girl takes the brunt of it." he swipes to a picture of jimmy pulling on minnie's hair to demonstrate. "she's a great mom. knows what every random sound he makes means. it's awseome." he was close to going on a full tangent about his wife when he remembered that he came over here on a mission.

"speaking of awesome..." very smooth, johnny, really subtle. "what's the deal?" he nods toward the bar, where sana is getting a drink from the bartender. his smile turns mischievous then, like he already knows the answer before chris can utter a word.

@gnhabsirhc

qveenminn

minnie: are you leaving the card for rosie or am i bringing it with? minnie: yes, can you bring me sweets? and you on the side 🤍

johnnyj-suh

Johnny: for you to go shopping but we can leave it for rosie tonight to order takeaway with Johnny: of course :) chocolate or fruity?

tyongmoney

이태용 삼천 바보 feat. 서영호 아빠 바보 | @johnnyj-suh

tyong: dada tyong: i'm back tyong: missed me

johnnyj-suh

johnny: of course I did

johnny: want to join me and jimmy for our morning walk before you head off to make TikTok’s for the day?

johnny watching the scene before him like it’s the new season of xo kitty (not that he binged it the day it came out or anything). he takes in every glance, every “friendly” touch between chris and sana with amusement. he’s on the edge of his seat, mentally cheering on his friend as sana whispers something in chris’s ear. but suddenly, a real-life commercial break comes in the form of sana walking toward the bar and away from chris.

his long legs carry him over to chris with forced casualness, like he’s just suddenly noticed him in the crowd and decided to say hi. “look who finally crawled out of the studio,” he chirps. “it’s been a while, bro. how’ve you been?”

@gnhabsirhc

Johnny: hey man, when is your next day off?

@souljae-boy

Johnny: Hey princess. I made dinner reservations at 8 tonight. Rosie will be over to babysit at 7. My card is on the kitchen counter.

Johnny: Do you need me and Jimbo to pick anything up while we’re out?

@qveenminn

Johnny: me and little man are locking in for his first dj lesson

Johnny: you should come drop by and show him how to hype up the crowd

@markpls

qveenminn

minnie’s steps were quiet, but she still winced at the faint creak of the floorboards as she made her way down the hall. she didn’t know why she’d gotten up, maybe out of habit, maybe because sleep hadn’t stayed long enough to matter. the nursery light was soft, warm, and her eyes landed first on james, peaceful in his crib. relief tugged at her lips in the smallest of smiles before her gaze drifted lower. johnny, stretched out on the floor with that oversized teddy bear crammed under his head, his long body folded in a way that couldn’t possibly be comfortable.

she leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, frustration and tenderness tangled into something messy in her chest. part of her wanted to scold him, tell him to stop being ridiculous, to come to bed where he belonged. but the longer she stood there, the more her expression softened. the sharp edge of her irritation dulled, leaving something else behind. the blanket in her hands slipped from her grip as she quietly padded across the room. for a moment she just hovered there, torn, then with a sigh she lowered herself to the floor beside him. the carpet was scratchy beneath her, but she didn’t care. inching closer, she shifted so their heads could both rest against the teddy bear’s plush body, their shoulders brushing.

for a while she just lay there, listening to the even sound of james’ breathing, letting the quiet settle around them. then, unable to help herself, she reached over to nudge johnny’s arm, her voice hushed but insistent. "hey" she whispered, waiting for some flicker of acknowledgment. her mouth twitched into the barest ghost of a smile. "we can share the teddy bear, you know. there’s enough pillow for two"

johnnyj-suh

at first, johnny didn't stir when minnie joined him on the floor. exhaustion had set in and quickly taken him to sleep, but the sound of his wife's voice pulled him halfway back to reality. "hmm," the awake part of his brain reacted immediately to her presence, hand reaching in the direction of her to pull her closer. his arm settled around her waist once he felt her warmth against his chest. "you should be in bed." he mumbles, voice thick with sleep. despite his comment, he only holds her closer and presses a kiss to minnie's forehead.

it's quiet in the nursery. james fell asleep quickly. he always did. it was the staying asleep that he had room to improve upon. outside, there is a soft trickle of rain against the windows and the slightest sliver of light slipping past the blackout curtains. johnny feels a rare peace settle over him in this space, surrounding their little family in the earliest hours of morning. "sorry," he whispers against minnie's hair. in his current state of consciousness, he doesn't recall what he did to upset his wife, only that it had been enough for him to hide out in here with their son. part of him considers taking her back to their bedroom, but the part of him that is hindered by exhaustion is stronger and only tucks minnie closer. "let's get married." he mutters before drifting back to sleep.

...

it's still dark when james's cry brings johnny back to reality. soft at first, but the son of singers quickly finds volume. the dancer groans as he shifts, attempting to release his grip on minnie without waking her. he stumbles his way into the kitchen in search of a bottle. muscle memory drives him, somehow warming the milk despite the residual grogginess in his brain, and brings him back to the nursery to hopefully quiet their son before he wakes his mother.

"looks like it's you and me tonight, champ."

johnny took time to carefully swaddle the baby, gently tucking the blanket into place before scooping him to his chest and carrying him over to the rocking chair. he presses his cheek to the crown of the baby’s head, impossibly small, impossibly real, and breathes in that faint sweet-milk scent. he should be tired. he is tired. bone-deep. eyelids dragging, muscles aching from days that bleed into nights and nights into days. but there’s something about this, the weight in his arms, the fragile heartbeat tucked close to his chest, that keeps him upright.

his mind drifts between awe and fear. awe, that this tiny person exists, that he and minnie made him, that they get to keep him. fear, because he doesn’t know what he’s doing half the time. because the baby cries and he can’t always fix it. because he sees how tired his wife looks and wishes he could shoulder all of it for her instead of piss her off like he's managed to do tonight.

still, when the baby’s breathing starts to slow against him, eyelids fluttering closed again, johnny feels something settle in his chest. a kind of peace. a kind of responsibility so big it scares him, but also fills him in ways nothing else ever has. “you’re okay,” he whispers, more for himself than for the baby. “we’re okay.” and when the little mouth finally slackens in sleep, johnny lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, rocking a moment longer before daring to lower him back down into the crib. he contemplates going back to the bedroom with minnie, but their son will surely wake up again in a matter of hours and he'll be right back here anyway. so he takes a larger teddy bear that someone had sent for the baby and uses it as a makeshift pillow on the ground beside the crib. "good night, champ"

@qveenminn

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