The Stonewall Inn
Today's Document
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EXPECTATIONS
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KIROKAZE
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@jordanatomy
#jordanatomy જ⁀➴ so when you leave me﮼ i should die — i deserve it﮼ don't i .ᐣ
𖦹 an indie-blog dedicated to jordan li from amazon's gen v 𖦹 as written by honey, she/her, twenty-two.
expectations જ⁀➴
18+ only , mature themes , canon compliant , open , multiship
credit જ⁀➴
psd icon border
[ STARFXLLCRE ] an independent multimuse featuring canon & original characters from a variety of different verses such as : criminal minds , dc , dead by daylight , detroit : become human , game of thrones , gen v , interview with the vampire , jennifer's body , marvel , peaky blinders , scream , stranger things , superman , supernatural , the boys , the quarry , the sandman , the secret history , those about to die , until dawn , wednesday , & more . penned by honey ( 22 , she/her ) .
🏳️🌈get to know the members of @gay!🏳️🌈 ↳ favourite canon character by dee ⋆ JORDAN LI + bigender flag
[ msg ➔ jordan ] : another wonderful day at vought… [ msg ➔ jordan ] : want to meet up? [ msg ➔ jordan ] : go somewhere i can hide my face. [ msg ➔ jordan ] : pretend i'm just a micro-celebrity again. who barely anyone who isn't christian knows.
text starter call. ★ jordan ( @jordanatomy )
[ msg ➤ annie ] : huh
[ msg ➤ annie ] : did something happen?
[ msg ➤ annie ] : idk where you wanna meet up
[ msg ➤ annie ] : i can come get you somewhere or you can chill in my dorm
[ msg ➤ annie ] : lmk
𖦹¡!❛ text starter call ━･ this looked like a lot of fun.ᐟ and it felt like a good way to get some content going for jordan, even in small increments. interact/like if you want a text from jordan (if you're multi-muse lemme know who it's going to)
just putting a reminder out there i am down to plot. if anyone wants to do memes, interactions, anything at all — i'm very open and currently not mutual exclusive.ᐟ
★ ╼ Every supe dreamed about becoming part of The Seven. To be the youngest member ever to join a headlining Vought group was honestly overwhelming. Rose-colored glasses were ripped off before the end of her first day. Crying in the bathroom – completely pathetic. But her mother was no stranger to pushing her into the deep end. The problem was this time she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to swim.
The manicured fingernails dug into the flesh of her palms. “I used to think, I was strong. I don’t think I can handle it. I’m supposedly living the dream – and I’m so out of my depth. It’s not what I thought it would be at all.” Tears well in the corner of her eyes. “I should be happy….I was finally supposed to be able to make a real difference. But I’m not a person anymore. I’m just a fucking product.”
“You know why they picked me? They liked my image….They didn’t care about what I’d done, or what I stand for. Just that I fit the picture they want to create. I really wanted to change things….I wanted to help people.” Quickly she wiped her eyes, before the tears could fall. “They want me to change my outfit…It’s super sexy. You know I’m not good at that. I’m a beauty queen – I’m not Barbarella. Not that there is anything wrong with that. It’s just, not me.”
“I wish I could go back and finish Godolkin with you. All of you taught me so much. You were the first real friends I ever had. The time we all spent together was the happiest I’ve ever been.” A soft sad laugh left her. “But you know my mother….She never really cared about my education. To her this was just a way for me to network and add value to my resume. Now that I’ve made it to the top – well, everyone agreed there is no point.”
Jordan’s compliment brought a morose smile to Annie’s face. “Thanks. At least someone thinks so. Meanwhile I feel like I’m going crazy.”
continued from here. ★ jordan ( @jordanatomy )
it had been one thing, getting to see someone else live the dream even she'd been naive to think she could achieve — but to find out the system itself had been corrupt all along was another thing entirely . once again , obstacles seemed to naturally find their way onto her path , her dreams and aspirations gone to shit along with everything else .
it cut deep .
worse— because her friend was suffering .
❝ hey , don't say that . you're not just some product , you're annie fucking january , alright .ᐣ ❞
jordan could be a selfish person at the best of times , but she cared about her friends . had the girl still been attending godolkin , she could have helped — but at vought tower jordan was out of her element , there was nothing she could do to diminish that pain they'd been enduring all this time .
it was a relief annie had chosen to come and see her . at least here , she could figure it out with them .
this wasn't a thing she had to do alone .
❝ you think godolkin's using me just because i'm useful .ᐣ no , they don't give a shit . they just wanna look good . ❞
jordan of all people understood what that was like . hell , probably more than anyone .
❝ don't get me wrong , i worked my ass off to get here . but they'll never let me be more than this , ❞ even as she said it , she had to remind herself that this wasn't about her . ❝ trust me , you don't wanna be here . everyone thinks they'll come here and it'll make them — you've already gotten further than most of us ever will . ❞
annie needed a nudge in the right direction .
❝ yeah , you're mom's a bitch , so what .ᐣ you don't have to do what she wants anymore , you're in the fucking seven . ❞
she needed someone who wasn't gonna sugarcoat the bullshit .
❝ look — i know it's hard . i'm not denying that . but — you're in a position right now where you can actually make a difference . yeah , vought's using you , and they're not gonna make it easy . ❞
she needed someone to remind her why she was doing all this in the first place .
❝ all i'm saying is , if you can hold out just for a little bit , learn everything you can , you can do whatever the fuck you want . maybe try not to go too crazy but— they won't be able to stop you . not if you're making them money . ❞
annie january could be the first to beat the system .
❝ you've gotten this far , annie . don't give up now . ❞
Derek Luh iPhone wallpapers
THEY HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG EVER IN THEIR LIFE!!!! THEY ARE PERFECT THEY DESERVE THE UNIVERSE!!
this pic should be illegal i need them to fucking beat me to be able to move on with my life good night
And I can go anywhere I want
Anywhere I want, just not home
❝ i don’t know how to fix myself. ❞
❝ oh , come on , annie . don't give me that shit . ❞
she's never quite known what to make of starlight — not with all the america's sweetheart bullshit spewing out of everyone's mouths . it might have been the quiet envy , getting to watch someone make it into the seven all on their own , with fans so willing to put them in the public eye without an ounce of hesitation .
then again — jordan never did quite meet starlight — she met annie january .
she was a flicker of light in a dim hallway , exceeding expectations in ways jordan never thought possible . to think they felt this way about themselves only seemed to prove what she'd already suspected — humanity was its own unreliable narrator .
❝ there's nothing to fix . you're like — one of the coolest people i know , alright .ᐣ ❞
⋆｡‧˚ʚ💋ɞ˚‧｡⋆ 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐢 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫?
❝ i know i’m too much. you don’t have to say it. ❞
❝ you’d be so much happier without me, wouldn’t you? ❞
❝ i don’t know why you stay. i wouldn’t. ❞
❝ i ruin everything i touch. ❞
❝ i’m sorry for being this way. i really do try. ❞
❝ i can’t stop thinking that i’m exhausting you. ❞
❝ you deserve someone easier to love. ❞
❝ i wish i knew how to need less. feel less. be less. ❞
❝ i don’t know how to fix myself. ❞
❝ you shouldn’t have to hold me together like this. ❞
❝ i don’t want to be a burden, but i know i am. ❞
❝ you love me now, but what about when i fall apart again? ❞
❝ i don’t want to be the reason you’re tired all the time. ❞
❝ maybe i’m just too loud. too sensitive. too complicated. ❞
❝ i think i make everything harder. ❞
❝ i don’t know how to be okay. and that’s not fair to you. ❞
❝ i’m scared i’m gonna push you away. ❞
❝ i hate this version of me. and i’m scared you will too. ❞
❝ i keep waiting for the moment you finally get tired of me. ❞
❝ it’s okay if you want to leave. i’d understand. ❞
❝ i always end up being the person people walk away from. ❞
❝ i can’t keep pretending i’m easy to love. ❞
❝ i see it in your eyes, how tired you are of me. ❞
❝ maybe if i was quieter, softer, easier… maybe then you’d stay. ❞
❝ you say you love me, but how long until you don’t? ❞
❝ i feel like i’m breaking your heart just by being who i am. ❞
❝ i don’t think i know how to exist without apologizing for it. ❞
❝ i keep waiting for you to wake up and realize i’m not worth this. ❞
❝ i talk too much. i cry too much. i feel too much. ❞
❝ why would anyone want to stay with someone like me? ❞
❝ you keep saying you’re fine, but i know i’m too much. ❞
❝ if i start to spiral again, will you still be here? ❞
❝ i don’t know how to be anything other than overwhelming. ❞
❝ loving me looks like a burden on you. i can see it. ❞
❝ what if i never get better? what if this is all i am? ❞
❝ i hate that i need reassurance just to feel okay. ❞
❝ you shouldn’t have to love me through this. ❞
❝ it’s not your job to fix me. i don’t want to ruin you too. ❞
❝ it hurts more when you don’t say anything. ❞
❝ i wish i could disappear before you stop loving me. ❞
❝ i’m not trying to push you away. i just… don’t want you to regret staying. ❞
❝ i think i’m just too complicated to keep. ❞
jordan + the gray tank top™
JORDAN LI + MARIE MOREAU
GEN V : SEASON 2 TRAILER
"I get a lot of kids don't have a choice. But you do. You could be a boy forever if you want." - GEN V (2023-)
(GOD U) 𝓜onday, 11:21am. the dorm lounge.
not exactly the welcome home she hoped for, but an outcome she prepared for, nonetheless. IT HAPPENED SO QUICKLY, didn't it? one moment they're hand in hand and the next? her friends are on the other side of the line, the one they won't cross. she hoped things would get easier, with time - now that they're back on campus. but she can't help but notice she is still THE OTHER. with their side-eyed glances and whispers that halt in her presence.
❝ you're looking at me like i'm see-through. ❞ @jordanatomy. FROM.
IS SHE? avoiding their eyes since they've sat down, dismayed by the air of discomfort that lingers in the air between them now. ❝ well you only look at me like i'm the enemy, so. ❞ seems like time didn't do much. why can't they see? I DID IT FOR THEM! for all of us.
❝ aren't you happy to be back? even a little? ❞ blue eyes naturally widen, a hopeful smile blooming at the inquiry. if things could only go back to the way they were before — MAYBE SHE WOULDN'T QUESTION IT SO MUCH. her actions that day & how it all ended. they were all swept up so quickly, she didn't even get a chance to say goodbye.
so—
there's a tight pressure that forms between her temples from how viciously she rolls her eyes at the retort — as though this were a mere argument between children .
but cate's always been good at playing the victim .
jordan knows she's not exactly innocent either — but at least she can own up to the part they played in all this . helping brink put luke to sleep that day was a mistake , no amount of validation could ever make up for that . had she known about the woods , she might have been able to switch course , to prevent all that followed .
cate knew about it that entire time , and instead of seeking out their help , she kept it covered up until it was too late . the damage had already been done . helping those kids beneath campus take their vengeance on the humans might have sold her redemption to everyone else , but jordan saw beneath the bullshit .
❝ happy to be back .ᐣ ❞ she asks , exasperation curving every syllable . ❝what , as if nothing happened .ᐣ ❞
there's no use in playing coy here , it won't work , not when they're sat across from a telepath .
❝ you already know what i'm thinking right now , cate , ❞ he sneers , hunching forward in his chair , gaze slicing directly through her . ❝ but don't think i'm just gonna forget you trying to use your powers on me . ❞
it slips across his mind each time her face appears — seeing that hand stretched out towards him , his fate decided for him through a mere touch , entirely helpless to prevent what awaits him the second she sinks her claws in .
