jordan brody

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

[Private F2F]

Minni gave him a small smile, ignoring the little bit of nerves that worked their way into her stomach. “Then I’m glad I offered.” She looked around and took a breath, this was the part where she was starting to lose some steam. She was good at the words, at knowing what to say, when they moved away from that though, she was still getting use to that. “When ever you’re ready.” She whispered. 

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

Jordan managed a small, quick smile in return, nodding slowly. He hesitantly gestured for her to go first, following silently behind her. He stopped at the doorway and glanced back inside his room, seeming to study it with the same sadness he’d had on his face all day. Maybe he was remembering things. Memories. But he swallowed it down for the time being, shutting the door gently and then following Minni down the hallway.

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

[Private F2F]

As he pulled away Minni felt a slight panic that maybe she’d misjudged. She pushed it away when he finished. In a way his words struck a cord in her chest, not because they were in any way true but because she had felt the same for so long. “Jordy, you are not a burden. Ever.” She moved back towards him. “And I will say it how ever many times you need to hear it.” Because she knew how hard those feelings were to shake. “Not wanting to be alone isn’t selfish, it’s a part of being alive. All of it Jordy, and none of it makes you any less okay.”

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

To tell the truth, she hadn’t. Misjudged. But it was hard to get his mind off of anything other than the loss of Eden. He blinked up at her as she tried to reassure him. “I -- yeah....” He released a shaky sigh, nodding slowly but still a little unsure. He just didn’t know how alive he really felt right then, but he held that back. Not wanting to make this any more depressing than it already was. ‘I, um, wouldn’t mind then,” Jordy mulled over his thoughts, nervously rubbing his hands together. “Staying? Um... with you...”

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

Minni wanted to tell him it was all right. That crying didn’t make him any less, but that didn’t mater right now. She let him pull away, and when he looked away she rose up on her toes and kissed him on the cheek. He needed time and she wasn’t sure if her being there would be any more help. She gave his hand one last squeeze before stepping away. “Your welcome.” 

She looked towards the door unsure of where to go from there. She’d sit all night with him if he asked.  “If you ever need someplace different, or quieter, my room is always open.”

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

He was a little startled when she did that, his cheeks heating up and he glanced away again. Nervously chewing on his bottom lip, he sat at the edge of his bed, pulling his knees up to his chest. He swallowed hard, glancing uncertainly to the door. “Oh,” he muttered, glancing back at forth between her and there. “I, um, I don’t wanna... burden you. Or anybody. I...” He rubbed his face as he continued to whisper. “But I... I hate being alone. But I feel like that’s... stupidly selfish,” he huffed, staring at the floor and sniffling.

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

[Private F2F]

Minni held on just as tight and let go of the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding when he wrapped his arms around her. As much as she had been feeling lost over the last few days, this felt right. She didn’t say anything but held onto him. Minni didn’t know how long they stayed like that, hugs were one of those things that when you really needed them you didn’t ever really want it to end. And she wasn’t going to let go, not until he was ready.

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

Jordan felt lost too. Maybe everyone in that house was feeling lost about one thing or another. Unfortunately, Jordy was feeling lost over a painful, gut-wrenching loss that he wasn’t sure he’d ever get over. Seconds went by before he realized tears were falling, and he flinched and pulled away to wipe them away. Maybe he felt a little ashamed of it, as if not wanting to seem weak in front of Minni. Even though everything in him wanted to just cry all night. He already did that the previous night. Maybe he’d do it every night for a long time.

“Um,” he sputtered, swallowing hard and nodding. “Thank you, Minni.” Jordy finally glanced back down at her, but his eyes only shifted back to the floor a moment later.

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

Lou wasn’t going to correct him, that maybe he should have said it more. She didn’t know his and Eden’s relationship. Jordan would have to come to terms with that himself. But what he said next… that Lou knew. “Hey, Jordan look at me.” Lou ducked down and made sure they were making eye contact. It felt like the absolute worst time for some pep talk. He was grieving. Much of the manor was. Her attention had been to give him a hug and let him cry, but this feeling Lou understood better than most. “You can do it without her. I know it feels like you can’t or that maybe it’s not even worth it without her. I understand. I really do. But you’ll be okay. And there will be new things for you to grow into and new people who will be there for you. It won’t replace her, but you’ll be okay. 

I don’t know... if I can. Do it. It feels... wrong. Doing anything without her here. She was... my rock. And I feel like... like I’ve hit the ground hard and can’t get up and it hurts and it scares me and I don’t know if I can be okay. Cause... most of the reason I was okay was because of her.

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

[Private F2F]

I don’t know either. Feelings are… they’re something I don’t think I’m very good at. But your right, words, word don’t really  help, at least not coming form any one else. So whatever you need, good or bad. I’m here.

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

Jordan wasn’t frustrated by the ones who said it. It was more just the situation, and how each time it was said, it was more of a reminder that he has lost something. Someone. Who wasn’t coming back. He didn’t want to be alone. He hated being alone. Eden was always there, and now she wasn’t. But each person that kept coming to him tried to tell him that he wasn’t alone, that they were there for him.

So he tried his best to hold onto that thought, even though everything was still hurting. He just held onto it, even for those few moments, and did the first thing that came to mind. He hugged Minni, and it was similar to when he hugged Lou, as if he was scared she’d fade away.

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

“It’s not fair. So very not fair,” Lou agreed with her own shaky breath, reaching out to take Jordan’s hand and squeeze it. She offered up a weak smile as he reminded her of the pool party and the teasing he’d done. Eden had been in rare form that night for sure. “She knew. People that you love like that. Who mean the most. You don’t have to say it for them to know.” Lou herself had spent her first few weeks agonizing over what had been her last words to people and if they knew how much she loved them. And then there had always been Theo. People knew. “The worst part is when they aren’t around anymore.”

“Still should’ve--” Jordy paused, sniffling and wiping his nose with his free hand. “Still should’ve said it... more...” He eyed the hand in Lou’s, shivering from chills that must’ve been from inside himself and not in the room. “I’m scared,” he whispered, feeling vulnerable and weak and just frightened. “I don’t know what to do... without her. I can’t... it hurts. What... what do I do?”

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

Lou was reminded that Jordan was a wolf - a physically strong one who was devastated and angry. She should be careful though she knew he would never intentionally harm her. “I don’t know, Jordan. Things happen and they’re terrible…” Lou wanted to say it would get better. She had always believed things could improve. Only with all the dark she’d seen it felt like such a hollow thing to say. “She’s gone but you’re here. You can’t give up on us Jordan.”

“It’s not fair,” Jordy growled, angrily wiping away the tears but more just kept coming without warning. “It’s not fucking fair. Why her?” It hurt. So fucking much. He was devastated, still in the processing stage that felt like it would last for an eternity. “I... I was teasing her about how she wasn’t... wasn’t fun and shit, and she made some funny threat and that was the last shit we talked about. Why--” he was shaking, his lip quivering as he stared up at Lou. “I didn’t even tell her that I loved her. I should’ve... I should’ve told her.”

[jordy-bro]

minni-vidmaenko​:

[Private F2F]

She isn’t here, and I am so, so sorry. There is nothing I can do. I wish I could. I’d give anything right now to be able to make it better.

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

I... I know. And I... but everyone keeps saying that. That... that they’re sorry. And I can’t --- I don’t know if that makes me feel better or worse. 

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

Lou squeezed a little tighter when Jordan broke down and a few of her own tears leaked out in sympathy. “Let it out. I got you,” Lou whispered softly running her hand up and down his back. She knew what it was like to lose the person who mattered the most in your life. To feel like nothing would be the same ever again. Somehow she had gotten Theo back, but Jordan wasn’t going to be so lucky. “I’m so so sorry.”

"Why?” Jordy choked out, and that one word had so much pained weight to it. “Why did this happen? Why--” He gritted his teeth, some of that anger boiling up in him again. “Why is she gone?” He nearly growled it out, but it was still outweighed by the broken sobs. Jordy backed away, burying his face in his hands and stumbling back onto the edge of the bed.

[jordy-bro]

charlieconnery​:

You’re not alone, Jordy. I know it feels like it and that me saying it probably doesn’t change how you feel, but…you’re not. So, if you ever need anything, whether it’s a sparring partner or a distraction or a hug or, I don’t know, anything. I’m here. 

.... Thanks. Um, thank... you. I... will you, um, stay? Please....

[jordy-bro]

caldwells​:

[  private  /  f2f  ]

You’re not bothering me. I wanted to… check in, see how you’re doing. I know it’s — it doesn’t make it better, but I’m sorry. I know she meant a lot to you.

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

I -- not really... doing... at all. I don’t know how to... I’m sorry.

[jordy-bro]

charlieconnery​:

I don’t either. 

Do you want to hold Balto? It’s stupid, but hugging him always makes me feel better. 

Jordy bit the inside of his cheek when she handed him the stuffed animal, and he recognized it. “The one from the fire,” he murmured quietly, remembering Charlie grasping it when he carried her out of the burning den. And the day that... he killed her uncle. He thought he saw her holding it after that too. “Um... thanks.” He sniffled quietly, holding Balto gently and trying to focus on that instead of his body’s urge to start crying again.

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

Hey. I heard-

I thought you could use some company.

He wanted to hold it together. Wanted to show some strength even when he didn’t feel strong at all. Everything hurt and once Lou hugged him, it all came pouring out like a violent storm on a sea of sadness and loss. He broke down against her, scared that if he let go, she may disappear too. And everyone else that was important to him. If someone, something, could take away the strongest person he knew, then who’s to say they couldn’t do the exact thing to everyone... everything... else?

[jordy-bro]

caldwells​:

[  private  /  f2f  ]

Jordan — you have to let me in at some point. I’ll stand out here all night if I have to.   @jordy-brody​

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

-------- M-Miss Haven. I, um, I’m... I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you -- I’ll uh, I’ll be quiet. Um... 

[jordy-bro]

charlieconnery​:

I understand. It…takes time, which is not an answer you want to hear, I’m sure. It takes time to even be able to feel your feelings properly. If – when you’re ready – you need someone to talk to, I’ll listen. I never had a sister, but I do know what it’s like to lose family. I’ll stay with you for as long as you want, okay?

.... Okay... I don’t like... being alone. 

[jordy-bro]

loustclaire​:

[f2f] @jordy-brody​

Jordan? Hey are you in there? It’s Lou.

[ PRIVATE F2F ]

Lou?