Neil Josten as f1 driver
occasionally subtle

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YOU ARE THE REASON

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@jostcn
Neil Josten as f1 driver
obsessed with neil josten as a reliable but negligent narrator. everything he tells you is true and necessary and important but he fails to tell you other basic things that maybe aren't absolutely necessary but would be pretty fucking nice to know. like we know the intimate details of his traumatic past that he keeps secret from everyone else but we have don't know his real name or what he even looks like. insane. narrator of all time.
You ever think Andrew’s like, folding laundry in his apartment with Neil, throwing socks into their shared drawer because neither of them give a shit about socks, and then he has to pause because…he’s folding laundry.
For him and his boyfriend. Who are both adults with like, health insurance and shit. They say shit like “let’s go home” and “what’s for dinner?” Nothing is separated in their dresser except for workout wear because they need different size compression gear. They have matching jackets in the closet and pictures on the wall. They kiss each other good morning, and hello. They grocery shop. And suddenly Andrew’s nicotine gum is heavy in his pocket, because he stopped smoking so he’ll never be too out of breath to reach Neil.
Andrew has to stop to feel his heart, as if folding t-shirts was running a marathon, because he didn’t think he’d last this long. He didn’t think this was possible.
So Andrew sits in their apartment and feels.
I want to talk about THIS moment. Right before. There's a TON of people misreading Caitlyn's intent because she's using such a playful demeanor after Vi's sorrowful self-deprecation. To be honest, it's the best response she could have had, and the best tactic. Her demeanor serves as a stark contrast to the spiral of self hatred that Vi is going down, and it's an excellent distraction. Caitlyn is stopping her line of thinking, right then and there, and she does it while delivering one of the most romantic and understated declarations of love I've ever seen.
Stay with me here.
Let's be very clear: Caitlyn did NOT come to the cell with the goal of seducing Vi. Not even. How do we know? Aside from several context clues that come before this scene, the way Caitlyn responds to the kiss is very telling:
See how long it takes Cait to even register what the fuck is going on?? She's literally like "oh. OH. we're kissing? WE'RE KISSING." And Vi also OPENS HER EYES very briefly, to check that Caitlyn is as into this as she is, right as Cait settles into the kiss, likely sensing her hesitation/delayed reaction. This scene is NOT Caitlyn seducing Vi. This scene is Caitlyn giving herself to Vi, and Vi choosing exactly what she wants to do with her, which is VERY different.
What does Caitlyn say right before the kiss? She says, "Do you really think I needed all the guards at the hexgates?" Translation: I left Jinx's cell unguarded on purpose. I want you to know that I heard you during our last conversation. I want you to know that I trust you. I want you to know that my love and care for you is more important than my need to sate my grief and desire for revenge. I choose you.
And following: "Sorry to say, you've grown a bit predictable." Translation: I know you. I see you. I knew you would choose this, coming after your sister, and I facilitated the circumstances in which you COULD choose this. You don't choose wrong. You choose love, and I understand that now. I want you to know that I support your choices, and they won't cost you the people you care about, at least not me, not anymore. I know that you'll always choose your sister, and I've made peace with that. What you want is what I want.
That is MONUMENTAL. That's quite possibly one of the most romantic things I've ever seen in media. Because who the hell has the guts to give up their grief and forgive their mother's murderer, all for love? That's a level of sacrifice that not enough people are acknowledging.
People say Caitlyn never changed, never felt remorse, never grew from the bad choices she made. I say wrong. And this was the turning point.
Andrew: no girlfriends
Aaron: okay
Andrew, gay:
These tags 😭😭
Can Neil flirt?
Yes
Only accidentally
Kind of
No
What in the hell would you call all of this then
Not my edit but this is pure comedy
“and as you’ve always said, you want nothing.” andrew stared stone-faced back at him.
forgot to post it here damn
Oh, i have cutie pie for you
And yeah, it is a redraw, just to check what changed over a ten months
Here is the old one
Home
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FINALLY finished this. I had to deliberately stop myself to call it a day.
This is an idea I got a veery long time ago and I thought I will abandon. But I came to a point I didn’t know what to draw so I decided to come back to this.
“I’m not a hallucination.” “No, you’re a pipe dream.”
Muscled women 😌🤌✨
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Got an idea to beat an art block with drawing ✨backs✨ and I also wanted to draw Renee so why not do both at the same time 😀
I've got my eye on you