My Heart Is Gold, But My Hands Are Cold

Jstar1992's writing blog. I'll be posting my writing here, and on my main blog.

[rainbowkarolina]

Captain Marvel (2019) dir. Anna Boden & Ryan Fleck

[thwippersnapple]

Life is too short for pants

[jstarwrites]

Don’t Think Twice (Ch. 2)

Chapter 2

    It was a few days later that Sky and I had spoken since the trailer and we both refused to talk about it. I didn’t want to push him into discussing it and figured the space would do us both some good. I walked into the office of Dr. Stanton shortly after Sky did, and our professor turned to us. “Welcome to your internships,” she began.

    Sky and I typically tried to have one class together each semester, and this time it was an internship to 3D scan artifacts to print. It would be in tight quarters in a small office, which I had no complaints about. I wasn’t sure if he would say the same thing. Sky turned to me and smiled. “You’ve been talking about this for months! You excited?”

    “Uh, yeah!” I said. We both looked back to Dr. Stanton. “Where do we start?” Our professor led us to our seats to go over the papers we had to sign before starting. I zoned out while signing the paperwork, only jumping back to reality when a copy of our 3D modeling textbook was laid in front of me. Sky snorted when I almost jumped out of my chair.

    “Go through the first chapter and we will meet up again next week to start,” Dr. Stanton said. Sky and I were dismissed after that.

    “Wanna grab coffee?” Sky asked. I tried my best to mask the yawn but it still slipped through. “You totally need a mocha.”

    I nodded. “Didn’t sleep well last night. I was up reading spoilers- can you believe that Nomura made Sora and Kairi share a paopu fruit, and then Sora is all about her in the endgame? I’m so disappointed. Their ship hasn’t been fully developed and its a disservice to them and to their shippers to make it canon with such barebones content and automatic assumptions that they should be a romantic couple. Let them be friends,” I began, looking over to Sky with a pout.

    “You’re passionate about their relationship?”

    “I don’t ship them, yuck. Sokai got ruined for me with all the crazy fucking fans. I used to hate Kairi with a passion though, because I had a crush on Sora when I was a little girl. But then I got older and saw what a disservice the series has done to her, I feel for her my dude. It used to be that a girl like me would never match up, but now it’s that I would never wanna be in her shoes. But Sora would’ve made it worth it,” I joked, trying to cover my embarrassment with an uncomfortable chuckle. Hey, I was six when the first game came out- Sora set the standard for male romantic interests in my life, and needless to say none had matched up thus far. And yes, I had spoiled a crucial part of the game I’d been waiting thirteen years for (excluding side games), but I felt it was my choice.

    “Well, who’s to say that since Sora has gone missing, he hasn’t found someone else?”

    “Wait, Sora goes missing?” I almost shouted, making the really cute soccer guys at the nearby table glance up at me with funny looks. Now I hadn’t gotten that far into spoiler territory. My jaw dropped. “You were reading the spoilers?”

    “I, uh-”

    “No you were reading them!”

    “I need to explain something to you,” Sky said. I paused. An explanation? “It’s...it’s about the nightmares, and where I came from. You have to know before the 29th.”

    “I’m so confused.”

    “You will be, until I explain everything to you. Trust me, it’ll be worth the wait,” he replied. My jaw went slack. Finally, this mystery would be solved and I would have answers to the burning questions I had harbored for the duration of this friendship. I didn’t want Sky to worry about it.

    “I’ll order pizza if you bring ice cream that night.”

    “Deal,” Sky responded. A warm smile crossed his face and I could tell that he was just as relieved as I was. Even though I was happy that he was coming clean, I still couldn’t wrap my head around his decision to reveal it before the game released. I started to get worried. My worries weren’t really that unfounded, looking back on it now.

[narukiami]

Our secret.

[jstarwrites]

Don’t Think Twice (Post Kingdom Hearts 3)

Chapter 1

    Sky came to my room again last night, but this time, there were tears in his eyes. Had I not been up late, he would’ve been stuck alone. The knock at my door took my attention from my Youtube app where I had been watching the Gamers Joint. I jumped out of bed and ran to answer the door.

    He was standing on the other side, a blanket wrapped around him, and sniffling. “May I come in?” he asked, his voice hoarse. I nodded then stepped aside and he walked into my apartment. Sky slumped down on the couch, his gaze focused on the floor. I sat down next to him.

    “You okay?” I tried to ask him but he refused to answer me. “You know you can talk to me about anything.” Sky didn’t reply, but he looked up at me with his big blue eyes. He shifted so that his body rested against mine, his messy brown hair brushing up against my neck. Some of the strands seemed to form points in his hair, and the messy spikes scratched at my skin. I wrapped my arms around Sky and pulled him close to me.

    “Bad dream,” he eventually said while hugging me. Sky had been having a lot of weird and bad dreams lately, as he had told me before. He didn’t like to talk about them with me and I never dared to ask. I stroked his hair, trying to calm him down after his terrifying nightmare. The room went quiet as I did this. Sky didn’t shed any more tears but I could tell that he still wasn’t ready to talk.

    “Want me to set up the bed?” Sky nodded to my question, his hair scratching at my neck again. I reluctantly pulled away from him to pull some blankets and pillows from my closet and my bed to make him comfortable. When I finished, I turned back to glance at Sky. He looked so sweet and helpless, all I wanted to do was hug him and not let go.

    We’d been friends since freshman year of college when he transferred in from a school very far away. Sky never told me where he came from but we became best friends instantly. His kind and gentle nature somehow broke through the walls I set up, and we’d been friends ever since. Back then, his nightmares seemed way worse. Then it stopped for awhile, but recently it started up again.

    Sky moved from the ragged university couch to the bed my roommate left open when she moved out of the apartments. He made himself comfortable and snuggled up under the soft gray blanket on top. In an instant, his eyes were closed and Sky was fast asleep. With a smile slowly creeping across my face, I crawled into my own bed and listened to Sky’s snores before falling asleep myself.

    The next morning, Sky’s snoring woke me up and reminded me that I was not the only person in the room. My best friend was a log on the spare bed in my room but I certainly didn’t mind. As long as he was okay and not affected by the nightmares, I had absolutely nothing to complain about. I would serve the standard breakfast that I always made when Sky slept over; chicken sausage, scrambled eggs, and half a toasted bagel with strawberry preserves. I forced myself out of bed to start making the breakfast for two, goosebumps littering my skin when the cold air hit it.

    The tiny kitchen was only steps away from my bed, but having just woken up, it felt like much further. I fumbled around in the kitchen, just barely hitting the light switch before knocking over the old RA telephone. “Fuck.” A shift in the other bed made me jump but Sky remained asleep. His snores were soft and he shifted once more in his sleep.

    He was always so cute and watching him at that moment showed why. The dusting of freckles across his tanned cheeks, his pouty lips, and upturned nose, it made Sky stand out. He looked so serene, until his face began to change. I knew what was coming next and I had to stop it before it became worse. The cooking could wait. I rushed over and began to wake Sky before the nightmare could get worse. A few good shakes was enough to end the snoring and bring Sky back from dreamland. He rubbed his eyes before mumbling.

    “Celine?”

    “I’m here, don’t worry,” I replied. “I’m starting breakfast.”

    Sky rolled up to where he was sitting. “The usual?

    “Always is,” I answered. I walked to the kitchen to start cooking for the two of us. The old dorm bed squeaked as Sky got up and stretched, a yawn coming from his mouth. “How do you sleep when you’re not with me?”

    “Poorly. Or not at all,” Sky said. I turned to face him. “My past haunts me. It’s always in my dreams.” He wasn’t facing me now, his gaze was downwards. I always wanted to ask him about his past and those dreams, but he would always go silent or say that it was a story for a later date.

    “I wish you felt comfortable enough to tell me about it. We’ve known each other for years now,” I said. I knew I couldn’t force it out of him, but I really wanted to know. Sky wouldn’t relent, and it was silly of me to think otherwise. I just wanted to know where he came from and why he’d been so secretive about it. Was it that dangerous?

    “One day, I promise,” Sky responded. He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder. My cheeks warmed up at his touches. We weren’t dating, but it‘s not because there wasn’t an interest at least on my part. I didn’t know if Sky was attracted to me or not, but touches like this made my heart pound. It always made me wonder where his interest was and what he thought of me, but I never dared to ask out of the fear of painful rejection. “I wish I could tell you everything I’ve gone through, but you’d probably think that I’m crazy.”

    “How could I ever think that?” I asked, my head turning towards him and away from the breakfast that was sizzling in the skillet. Sky’s arms tighten only a little around my waist but it brings us closer together.

    “If I told you, I know you wouldn’t believe me. My story is long and very strange, and being here- with this normal life- I dunno if it’s the most normal or the weirdest thing I’ve ever done,” he replied. I was surprised- I never wanted to push Sky into revealing his life, but I didn’t know he kept it secret for that reason. I still wanted to know but I knew it would only hurt things.

    “Tell me whenever you’re ready, if that day ever comes,” I said and I left it at that. Sky pulled away and the minute the cool air hit my skin, I wanted his arms back around me again. There were no words I could utter to express how I was feeling- how I wished he felt comfortable enough to share this secret with me, or how I wanted him to hold me again and not let go. Sky went and sat down on the crummy couch while I finished the breakfast before plating it. “Want coffee?”

    “Sure,” Sky said. He stretched out on the couch while I turned off the stovetop then went to brew a pot of coffee for the both of us. “Thank you for letting me stay with you again. I really appreciate it.”

    “It’s no problem and you know that! Now make room for me.” I grabbed both plates and took them over to the coffee table. Sky took the plates from my hands and I went back and grab the coffee and forks. “I’m guessing you’ll be joining me for lunch?”

    “Not lunch. Probably dinner though. You keep the dark-the nightmares at bay,” Sky said before starting to scarf down his food. The dark? What could he even mean by that? “Ignore what I said. I’ll order Chinese food tonight. Orange chicken, the usual?” I had a mouthful of egg at this point so all I can do is nod. Sky was deflecting; he was always a terrible liar and that day had to be his worst. He was quick to eat so he wouldn’t have to answer any questions, and all I wanted to do was hug him.

    I swallowed my food. “Tell me when you’re ready. That’s all I ask,” I said. Sky looked at me and gave me a sad smile.

    He finished his food without another word. “Delicious as always. I’ll swing by later for dinner. You said something about a video game you wanted to show me?”

    “Oh yeah!” I replied. I went to grab my phone from my nightstand, opening up YouTube the minute my phone was unlocked. I typed Kingdom Hearts 3 into the search engine and hit enter. Immediately results popped up of trailers and theory videos, and I clicked on the final battle trailer that I had been thinking about since last night. I hurried back over to Sky while the ad played in the background and shoved my iPhone into his hands. “You’ve gotta watch this! The game comes out in a few weeks!”

    The trailer began and I sat back as Sky watched. He seemed fine up until a certain point and his face changed. It was a reaction I’d never seen from him before and he visibly shuddered right at Sora’s scream. The phone was dropped and all Sky could say was “I’ve gotta go.”

    He raced past me and was out of my apartment faster than I could react, and I was left with the remnants of “Don’t Think Twice” fading into the background. All I could do was sigh.

[numberonefrancisforeststan]

“i really liked your post!”

Thanks How About You Reblog It :)

[numberonefrancisforeststan]

just in case you’re wondering what i’m talking about:

13%, 21%, a whooping 30%, 15%, 21% again. and those are the stories that do well.

it’s almost like tumblr has a reblog button you could USE

LIKE IT? REBLOG IT!

it’s not fucking difficult.

[numberonefrancisforeststan]

also i love how i gotta make these posts practically every time after i publish something.

look, i don’t give a fuck about money. i’m writing fic for fun. if you wanna throw a billion dollars at me, sure, you do you.

but literally all i want, all we all want, is for our stuff to be acknowledged. spread. REBLOGGED. 

because obviously you read it and liked it, right?

so now all you have to do is hit that little button. it looks a little like this

and then that’s that. 

or, on ao3, you write “i really liked this! thank you for sharing!”. and that’s that.

it takes absolutely ZERO EFFORT, and it makes you happy (because you liked what you just read) and it makes us happy (because our work can get potentially more readers), and everyone is happy.

and instead, there’s likes all around. 

and likes are a little like seeing someone having their arms full with things and they drop their keys and you walk past and say “hey dude, i hope that works out for you!”

writers spend hours, even days and weeks or months on fics, pouring ourselves into it, forgoing sleep and food sometimes just to finish something because we hope you’ll like it.

and we get a litte ❤️ for our troubles and that’s it.

and especially when you get statistics like above - 42 likes and 9 reblogs - it feels like a kick to the face. 

if every writer only wrote for themselves (”as you’re supposed to do uwu”), there wouldn’t be a single fic out there, because we’d keep all the fics. but we write for our audience too, hoping we’ll hear back, hoping people will spread our fics, “hey, look at this cool thing i read!”.

and that doesn’t happen.

so you start thinking “hey, maybe i shouldn’t publish this. it’s bad anyways, right? and it doesn’t make a difference if i do. it’s not like anyone cares.”

how many thousands and thousands of words for your favorite ship do you think are out there, saved on hard drives by authors who’ve given up wishing to publish their things, because “nobody cares.”

reblogging and commenting seems to be at an all time low at the moment. and you know what happens when you, the supplier, feel like there’s no demand out there? 

you stop supplying.

because nobody cares enough to want to share it.

“thoughts and prayers with your fic! it was so good!” that’s what the like button means, to make an extreme comparison here.

and honestly, i don’t understand why.

reblog. your. writers. it’s all we ask for.

[ashaftermidnight-deactivated201]

No writers or artists are trying to sound “whiny” by asking for this. It’s literally how our work gets any recognition since we’re not doing it for money. If you’d like to make a writer’s day or an artist’s day, please consider reblogging works that you love. I promise you will put a smile on their face. <3 <3 <3

[prettyblossoms]

Very, very true! 

[richietoaster]

GOOD POST

[heraclesmaximoff]

We read the tags too, want to rant in them, go right ahead, I promise we’ll see them. 

[mal-functioning-writer-deactiva]

I’m just gonna, uh, put this right… here.

[works-of-fanfiction]

I know how this feels as I just don’t get reblogged. Please help us spread our work by reblogging and encouraging others to find us! ♡

[imaginesfordayss]

Please guys! The more reblogs the more our works get spread around and that’s kind of the whole point in writing for free!

[tawnywrites]

Reblog to save a life…

[jstarwrites]

Dog Tags (Prompto x OC)

(No trigger warnings)

The mission Dave sent the boys on was for another set of missing tags. The hunter, he’d told them, had lost them on the last mission and was still actively searching for it. He told them that she would be back at camp to retrieve it when they returned.

Immediately, Prompto’s ears had perked. “I wonder who she is, or if she’s pretty, or-“

Gladio interrupted him. “I thought you were all about Cindy. Then came Aranea, and now you’re wondering about some girl you’ve never even seen. Pick a girl and stick with her.”

Prompto bit his lip while the others laughed. They all knew he was a skirt chaser, well, an unsuccessful one. He couldn’t help himself- the thought of a female hunter, fighting off daemons, it intrigued him. It took a lot of guts to face these enemies.

They trekked through Hammerhead, fighting off daemons as they searched for the elusive dog tags. Prompto had wondered why Dave wouldn’t be there to greet them when they returned, but he tried not to think about it too much. The man was always so busy.

The tags were found dangling on a bush, and Ignis picked them up before examining them. “Maris Hastam. Blood type O+, age 20, native of Lestallum,” he read, turning over the metal with the black silencers in his hand.

“Well, let’s head back. It’s getting dark and I’m ready to sleep,” Noctis said.

The walk back to Hammerhead was short, but to Prompto it seemed to drag on forever. All he wanted to do was see this hunter, and then he could set up camp and go to bed. When they arrived, of course they saw Cindy working on the car, and Prompto took a peek at her behind in those tiny shorts she insisted on wearing. But the weight of the dog tags brought him back to reality, and he turned to see a young woman leaning up against the trailer near Takka’s, and they approached.

Prompto’s heart stopped.

Long, tanned legs concealed in black jeans, with black combat boots. A gray crop top that revealed a toned stomach and belly button ring, with a cloth black vest over top, and black fingerless gloves. She had long black hair in a braid, with curly strands peeking out, framing a tawny, heart shaped face with brown eyes, a slim nose, and full, pouty pink lips. She was absolutely beautiful.

His jaw hit his chest, and the others definitely noticed. “So, you must be the boys that Dave sent out. You found my dog tags?” She said.

Gladio snickered as Prompto fiddled with the dog tags before handing them to Maris, and his face heated up when he felt her fingertips brush against his hand.

“Thanks boys, I owe ya one! Let me know what I can do to help ya out,” Maris said. She pulled out a scrap of paper, scrawled her phone number on it, and handed it to Prompto with a wink before walking away.

Prompto watched her swaying hips and ample bottom when she left, then turned around to the others. “My goddess of the hunt!” He exclaimed.

“Prompto?”

“Yeah Noct?”

“You’re having a nosebleed.”

[jstarwrites]

Stand By Me (Chapter 2)

~no tags this time~

Chapter 2

           I wake up later, still tucked in the car, but everyone else has exited. Stretching my arms and legs with a yawn, I sit up and get out of the car. “Well, sleeping beauty is finally awake,” Gladio says, making me pause in my tracks.

           “Uh, hey everyone. Need any help?”

           “You can help me set up the tent,” Prompto says, gesturing to the toppled over clusterfuck of cloth and poles that should be a tent, and I stifle a laugh.

           “Sure Prompto. I’d be happy to help,” I answer, walking over to help him. I’ve never out a tent together, but maybe two heads are better than one. While I help Prompto set up the tent, he hums the chocobo song, and I find myself humming along. The others content themselves with setting everything else up for camp. The camp is quiet, save for the sound of the chocobo song and the occasional chirp of birds flying over.

           Eventually Prompto and I construct the tent, and it doesn’t look half bad. “Wow, two heads really are better than one. It actually looks good this time,” Gladio says with a chuckle.

           “Hey!” Prompto replies, pouting. I stifle back a laugh as I watch the scene unfold before me. To think that just hours ago, I was being dragged out of Insomnia by my best friends. I was escaping all I had known, as everything around me fell in the tragedy. Now here I am, laughing with the crown prince- well, king now I guess, and his guards.

           In an instant, I feel my heart sink. How can I be laughing when I’ve lost everything? Have I become so cold in such a short period of time? What is wrong with me? The sun sets around us after we set up camp, and I’m left wondering what’s become of Celeste. What remains of the city, and of my friend? Ignis whips up a meal at the campfire, while the rest of us are left sitting around the fire, while the rest of us are left sitting.

           “So Maris, tell us about yourself,” Gladio begins before taking a bite of his prairie-style skewer.

           “Oh, um, I’m nobody to be honest. My parents used to own the Stella Bakery on Main Street, but it burned when the Niffs attacked. I used to help my parents out, and they were planning on leaving the bakery to me once they retired. Other than that, there’s not much to me,” I explain.

           “The Stella Bakery? I loved their peanut butter cookies!” Prompto says with a grin.

           “Those were my special recipe. I would be happy to make them for you if I could find a place with an oven.”

           Prompto lights up and smiles from ear to ear. “For real? That would be awesome!” I take a bite out of the meat on one skewer while Prompto gushes over the cookies I made at the bakery. All I can do is smile as he recalls them from memory. “I swear, I used to eat the whole box of cookies in days.” Prompto looks over at me with a warm smile, and I feel my face heat up.

           Don’t Maris. Don’t forget what happened to you the last time a guy smiled at you like that. I look down at my shoes, trying to hide the blush until it goes away. You can never trust a smile like that again, not after what he did. My stomach churns at the thought, so I put my skewer off to the side. Gotta get these thoughts out of my head. It’ll be a long time before someone can ever look at me like that again.

           The guys chat while I try to eat the remainder of my skewer. It feels like my throat has turned to sandpaper, and I force myself to swallow the meat. I sip on water to force it all down, and it helps me finish my meal. “Is it alright if I just go to bed now?” I ask.

           “Of course. Please, sleep well Maris,” Ignis says, taking my plate. I tell the rest of the group goodnight before dismissing myself to the tent, laying down, and closing my eyes.

[boo-dangy]

Night So Long

Author notes: Ok, so this is my first time writing fanfic and sharing it so I’d really appreciate any feedback or constructive criticism! It is quite long at approximately 4500 words (I’m sorry) and that’s because I started when I was horny but then caught feelings for it (story of my life).

This story features smut and fluff and angst, bisexual reader and implied bisexual Prompto. If you read through it all then THANK YOU and I hope you enjoy it! I also have it posted on Ao3 under the username FinalFantasyDreamer so pls leave kudos if you enjoy it and have an account.

Prompto x Reader NSFW

It wasn’t like you’d never hooked up with a stranger before. It’s just that you’d never had such a good time of it. You were used to them just taking their pleasure from you and leaving, but this guy… he was different. It was like he got off on getting you off. Well, judging by the way he went down on you anyway. He was vigorously thorough. He pressed down on your lower abdomen and tightly gripped your thighs when your convulsions were particularly erratic. Whenever you moaned he ground his erection into the mattress.

He had told you his name: Prompto, and he lived up to it by not wasting any time getting you back to his place and into his bed. Who would have ever expected it from such a sweet looking boy? Not you, that’s for sure. His wide blue eyes and freckle-dusted features combined with the broad, passionate smile he wore when he had spoken to you about his photography had deceived you into believing there was some inexperienced innocence to him. Oh, but, there was no way he hadn’t done this at least a few times before.

He sucked on your clit and circled it with his tongue. Your eyes rolled and your back arched as you cried out and gripped his hair. You were so close now and he knew it. He expertly tongued you as his left arm slid up your body to grope your breast. You ground your crotch against his face, alcohol having loosened your inhibitions and finally, with a strangled moan, you came as he tweaked your nipple.

You lay there panting heavily as you came down. He was still between your legs kissing your inner thighs gently.

“You okay?” he asked, his voice husky.

You could only nod and moan quietly.

He lifted himself up and climbed over your body. He kissed your collarbone and continued sloppily up to your neck.

“You wanna keep going?” he questioned.

You nodded again.

“Good” he said in a low voice “cuz I’ve been dying to fuck you.”

His words alone made you bite your lip and moan. He reached over to the side dresser and pulled a condom out of the drawer before unbuckling his belt, throwing his pants aside and rolling the condom down his cock. He threw his hands into your hair and kissed you deeply while he lined himself up with your mound. You could still taste yourself on him. He ground himself against your clit causing you to inhale sharply. You were so desperately close to having him.

The anticipation was too much.

You latched your legs around him and flipped him onto his back. You ground your pussy down onto him. The action had him gripping your hips tightly as his head lolled back, letting out a far louder and more passionate moan than you had ever heard from you previous partners which only encouraged you of course.

You grabbed his dick with the intention of guiding it inside you but upon noticing that your hand couldn’t quite close around it you looked down. You didn’t know what you were expecting the young man who charmed you to be packing in his skinny jeans but you definitely weren’t expecting something THAT size. Your mouth fell open in an inaudible gasp.

“Nng, everything okay?” he moaned breathily.

Your answer came in the form of you plunging yourself onto his thick cock. You both moaned out in unison. He tightened his grip on you as you involuntarily ground against him. He thrust up into your pussy and you gripped his toned chest to balance yourself.

You felt so deliciously full. You lightly scratched down his torso as your back arched. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled your body down against him as he thrust himself into you in a borderline violent fashion. A high pitched moan escaped you as he latched onto your right earlobe with his teeth. You moved your hips in a circular motion, egged on by his shuddering breath. He continued to fuck you at an unrelenting pace. You could barely keep your vision straight while he dragged his hands down your arms and back up again until they were either side of your face holding your head in place and forcing your eyes to gaze down at his as he brushed his lips against yours, whispering desperately about how good you felt, how tight you were around him, how soft your body was against his, how nobody had fucked him like you were right now. It set you on fire and you moved against him wildly, feeling the intense build up that you usually had to coax out of yourself.

Your eyebrows furrowed and you looked desperately into his hooded eyes as your fingers twined into his soft hair and pulled. His eyes snapped shut and his strokes faltered as he threw his head back and shamelessly moaned at your action. His eyes flew open again and he glared at you intensely as he delved his left hand roughly into your hair while his right hand slid between you both to finger your clit.

The sensation of his solid cock pulling out and entering you combined with the sweet friction from his fingers pushed you right to the edge. He tugged at your hair and with that you were gone. Your walls clamped around him as you came all over his cock. You propped yourself up on his chest again and your hips continued to move against him, involuntarily riding out your orgasm. Your mouth hung open as you let out a chorus of profanity, praising him and the pleasure he made you feel. He pulled himself up to bite at your neck and move your body roughly down onto his cock until he too let out a loud stream of moans as he thrust himself into you deeply and came inside you.

Your breath shuddered as he held you against him. He slowly stroked up and down your back with his fingertips and pulled you both back down onto the bed. He kissed you on your forehead, your nose, your closed eyes, your lips. His hand reached gently into your hair and massaged your scalp as you stroked his cheek with your thumb. You moved your lips slowly against his as you both enjoyed the final moments of your euphoria.

You went to move off of him but he grasped you tightly by the hip.

“Please” he whispered “let’s just stay like this a little longer.”

You gazed down into his eyes and he stared back pleadingly. How could you deny him?

“Ok,” you spoke softly as you rested your forehead against his, your nose gently brushing the tip of his.

You remained there for a few moments, eyes closed, until he sighed contently.

“Wanna get a shower?” he asked.

“Mmm, shower would be great.” you cracked your eyes open slowly and nuzzled your face into his neck. You clambered off of him and out of the bed and pulled on your crumpled shirt and underwear while he stretched and followed you out of the bed.

He looked down at you and lightly circled your waist with his hands as he leaned down and placed a slow and gentle kiss to your lips. You sighed into it and he slowly pulled away and stroked your hair.

“C’mon,” he smiled “ I’ll show you to the bathroom.”

You followed him out of the room and through the hallway of his apartment. He grabbed two towels along the way as well as disposing of the used condom and led you to the shower. He turned a knob and water flowed out of the shower head.

“Feel free to you use the shampoo and stuff”he gestured inside the shower. “I’m afraid I don’t have anything for ladies so if you do use it you’re gonna smell like me.” he shrugged.

“Worse things to smell like I guess,” you smiled softly and felt your cheeks redden slightly.

“I’ll leave you to it then,” he grinned and went to leave the room but you grabbed his hand. He turned to look at you questioningly. You simply jerked your head in the direction of the shower and stepped under the water, still holding his hand. He smiled widely and followed you in, the water flattening his sex-tousled hair against his face. The shower space wasn’t tiny but it was a snug fit with two people in it. You ran your fingers through your hair trying to de-tangle it a bit before washing yourself.

“Hold on,” he reached his arm out of the shower and pulled out water, a hairbrush. He gestured for you to turn around and you timidly obeyed. You hadn’t had a lot to drink in the first place so with the vigorous exercise you’d just engaged in combined with the refreshing water, you felt yourself beginning to sober. He ran the brush gently through your wet hair. The gently strokes quickly got you relaxed. He stopped brushing and you heard him open up a bottle and then felt him massage something cold into your hair.

“I-You don’t have to-”you started but he cut you off by turning you to face him and placing a quick kiss to your lips.

“I want to,” he stated simply and got back to running the shampoo through your hair. You spotted a bar of soap on the rack behind him and you leant over to grab it and began rubbing it over his chest and creating a lather. You caught his gaze as he smiled down at you and you quickly glanced away, feeling vulnerable at the intimacy of the situation.

“Everything alright, pretty lady?” he questioned, rinsing the last of the shampoo out of your hair.

You blushed and nodded. “ I-Uh, yeah,”you stammered “I just-it’s just that-I mean, I’ve never, uh, I’ve never really done this before.”

He looked at you surprised. “What, you mean you’ve never gone home with a stranger?”

“Oh no!” you exclaimed “I have, it’s just I’ve never like, stayed after. I mean, they’ve never been this kind to me. It’s normally like, they roll over and I go home, you know? I’m not usually offered a shower or anything like this it’s just, I’m a little bit out of my comfort zone, I guess. Like, I’m used to the sex part, I’m comfortable with that it’s just that THIS is kinda… I don’t know…” You trailed off as you felt like you were rambling and you noticed he was staring intensely at you as you spoke.

“Well…” he started, his voice had dropped an octave, reigniting the embers of your arousal. “I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.” You gulped and gently bit your lip as he slid his fingers into your hair at the base of your skull and inched his face closer to yours. He captured your lips and kissed you deeply but pulled away before you lost yourself in it.

“So,” he continued “What if I do this,” he slowly sunk down to his knees, kissing your breasts and stomach as he went. Your breath shuddered as you watched him, now unable to break eye contact, hypnotised by his voice and actions. He settled between your legs and wrapped his arms around the inside of your thighs causing you to spread your legs. You braced yourself against the wall and his hands rested on your ass as he left soft kisses on your thighs and lower abdomen.

“I do this,” he repeated huskily “and you shampoo my hair, since your hands are gonna be in there anyway. That way, you’re doing something you’re comfortable with and slowly broadening your comfort zone so the next time I bring you home, this part won’t be so weird for ya.”

“The next time!?” you half gasped, half laughed as you looked down at him wide-eyed.

He stared back and simply smiled and nodded before running his tongue along your pussy and circling it around your clit once again. You gasped and moaned out a strained “OK” as you somewhat blindly grabbed for the shampoo. He continued to lick you out beautifully as you shakily squeezed out some shampoo and rubbed it into his hair. You tried to be gentle but he was so good at eating your pussy and you were still sensitive from your previous orgasms so you ended up yanking his hair and scratching his scalp instead. He didn’t seem to mind though as his eyes rolled back and you felt him moan against you. There was something so erotic about the way he looked up at you, his eyes hooded yet piercing and his adorable freckles buried in between your legs.  The warm water still hitting your back served to heighten the sensations he was making you feel. Your heartbeat was rapid and your breath frantic but, you managed to rinse out the last of the shampoo as he sucked your clit particularly hard causing you to moan sharply and shudder erratically against his face.

“OH GOD!” you yelled out as you came for the third time that night. You leaned your upper body against the wall and panted heavily while you watched him disconnect from you.

“See,” he said brightly, still on his knees, “that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

You laughed breathlessly and shook your head. He stood up and shut off the shower as you regained your breath and balance. He brushed some stray hair out of your face and kissed you sweetly.

“You doin’ ok?”

You gave him a small smile and nodded gently.

“Great, lemme get your towel,” he stepped out of the shower and handed the towel to you and you both began to rub yourselves dry. You looked over at him to see he was already looking at you, fresh faced and smiling, as beautiful and kind as before he took you home. You stepped toward him and leaned up to kiss him. He softly obliged and you pressed your body against his. You felt his erection against your stomach and your eyebrows shot up in surprise. You broke the kiss and stared into his eyes.

“You’re really not like anyone I’ve ever been with,” you said softly as you swiped a droplet running down his cheek.

“Yeah? And how’s that?” he asked as he stroked your hair.

“I’ve already had sex with you and you treat me the same after as you did before. You’re still sweet and fun and gentle,” you explained. He furrowed his brow at your words. “That,” you continued, trailing your hand down his abdomen “and I’ve never known anyone to regain an erection so fast.” You gripped his hard cock and sank down to your knees.

“You don’t have to-” you cut him off by sucking the tip of his length into your mouth causing him to moan sharply. You pulled away and looked up into his eyes.

“ I want to.” You licked the under side of his cock from base to tip and he visibly shuddered and gasped as you circled the tip with your tongue before closing your lips around him and bobbing your head along his length. His head pulled up as he let out a long, low moan and his right hand grasped a handful of your damp hair.

“Wow you’re good at that,” he gasped out as his body fell back to lean against the wall and his free hand stretched out blindly to find something to balance himself with settling on the sink to is left.

His moans of praise egged you on and you took him further into your mouth. You grabbed onto the base of his shaft tightly and hollowed out your cheeks. His grip on your hair tightened and he moaned deliciously. You’d never had a partner this vocal and you loved it.

“Hnngaah-I’m gonna cu-I’m hah,” he gasped out, unable to speak coherently but you got the message and braced yourself to take his cum. With one last strangled groan he shot his load down your throat, still gripping your hair tightly as his body writhed against the wall and you swallowed it all gratefully.

You pulled away from him and slowly raised yourself up, gliding your hands up his thighs and hip bones until the side of your face was resting against his stomach, moving with him as he panted. He hunched his body over you and rested one hand in your hair at the base of your neck while the other travelled down your shoulder, gently stroking circles into your skin. You could feel his heart beat against you and you found your fingertips tracing the jagged, silvery lines on his stomach, like beautiful lightning etched gently into his skin.

You remained like this for a moment until his hands found yours and helped pull you up to your feet. He pulled you against his torso and kissed your lips gently.

“You really didn’t have to do that you know,” he spoke softly as his hands rubbed up and down your arms.

You studied his face. His cheeks were dusted pink and you could practically count his freckles from this close.

“I know,” you responded gently.

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against yours a small smile curving his lips. You sighed contently but it was short lived as he reached around your body to smack your ass. You gasped in surprise and pulled away to see him grinning at you cheekily.

“C’mon, I’ll get you some clothes to sleep in.”

You giggled at his antics and followed him back to his room.

You lay in bed wearing his red tank top and a pair of his grey sweatpants.The rays from the powerful street light outside managed to shine through the gaps in the shutters and illuminate the room a little. Your head rested on his arm as he spooned you. His other arm rested on your hip and you tried to match his breathing and drift off to sleep but you couldn’t seem to. Frustrated, you sighed deeply.

“Can’t sleep?” he mumbled against your ear. You hummed in response. “Yeah me neither.” He stretched onto his back and you rolled over to face him.

“Can’t stop thinking ‘bout stuff,” he twirled a strand of your hair as he spoke.

“What stuff?” you asked gently. He pursed his lips and looked away from you. He opened his mouth to speak but shut it again abruptly. He slowly rolled back onto his side and stroked your cheek with the back of his hand. Your eyebrows furrowed and he kissed you where your forehead creased. After a short moment he spoke.

“Why do you keep doing this stuff if the guys you’re doing it with aren’t good to you?” he asked, concern evident in his voice. You were taken aback by the the question and your eyes shifted and your mouth hung open as you tried to formulate a coherent response.

“Well, I uhh…um…” you weren’t sure what to say. It wasn’t a part of who you were that you had talked about with yourself yet, let alone someone you’d just met a few hours ago.

“Hey, forget it, I shouldn’t have asked, I’m sorry.” He went to move away but you stopped him with your hand on his.

“No, it’s ok. You just took me by surprise is all,” you started. “I guess… Well, it’s kind of a long

story.” You glanced down at your fingers brushing his. You were silent for a moment. He waited patiently, eyes never leaving your form.

“So,” you finally spoke. “The shorter version is: I was seeing someone, a pretty long while ago now. It was pretty serious and I guess I was in love.” You felt silly sharing this with him but his face never showed signs of judgement. He just rubbed his thumb against your palm and let you speak.

“Anyway, we uh, we broke up,” you felt tears prickling at your eyes. “ And it was not mutual.” A single tear rolled town your cheek and you scrambled to swipe it but he beat you to it, gently running his thumb against your cheek, his eyes showing his empathy as he stared into yours. “And so that sucked quite a lot but, after a couple of weeks of feeling sorry for myself, I decided I was gonna just get over it. Of course, that’s not something that you can really decide.” He shared a small sympathetic smile as you continued. “I guess, I figured I’d try the ‘get over someone by getting under someone’ technique but, that just made me feel kind of lonely somehow, so I stopped for a while but… that was even lonelier. I guess I just craved any kind of affection but, it wasn’t… I mean, I just kept comparing everyone else I was with to her and it just wasn’t the same.” His eyebrow quirked at that and your hand clasped over your mouth and your eyes bulged as you realised what you’d just let slip. You bolted upright and covered your face with your hands.

“Hey, hey, hey, don’t panic, this is a safe, judgement free zone,” he exclaimed as you took several deep breaths. He sat up next to you and gently stroked circles onto your back with the palm of his hand.

“I haven’t even told my parents that yet,” you whispered as he moved to rub your arm reassuringly. “Yikes,” you gasped quietly.

“Sometimes it’s easier to share that kind of stuff with a stranger,” he said as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and squeezed you gently. You glanced at him timidly and he offered you an encouraging smile.

“Thank you,” you mumbled.

“No need to thank me for being halfway decent,” he said as he pressed a kiss to your temple. You gulped back the lump forming in your throat and took a deep breath in and slowly let it out. “You don’t have to tell me more. I know that must’ve been hard.” He wrapped his arms around and tucked your head under his chin.

You felt him gulp and he began to fidget with his fingers.

“I guess I’m in a similar boat,” you heard him say. You shifted your body to look up at him. His eyes were distant as he spoke. “I mean we weren’t together but… I can’t see them anymore and well, it does suck. A hell of a lot.” His voice was shaky as he finished speaking and he pulled you into a hug which you gladly reciprocated. You remained in each others tight embrace for some time, each of you sniffling occasionally. You took this moment to reflect on the events of the night and how different it had been from your regular routine of get drunk, get fucked, go home, feel numb. This night was pretty opposite to it all. Instead of numb you felt everything from grief to comfort and from hurt to relief.

After several minutes you detached from one another and lay back down. You both sighed in unison causing you to giggle tiredly. You looked over at him and he, at you. His eyes were a little bit red and puffy as, you were sure, were yours. You gave him an affectionate smile which he returned. Everything felt still and calm for you for the first time in what felt like forever. You moved to rest your head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around you.

“I’m really glad we met,” you said delicately.

“Yeah… so am I.”

He pressed his lips to the top of your head and held you like that for a moment before pulling away and sliding out from under you so he could be face to face with you.

“What’re you doing tomorrow?” he asked suddenly. You were taken aback for what seemed like the millionth time that night.

“Umm, no plans,” you said, searching his face.

“Well…” you could feel he was nervous. “You wanna stick around for a while?” he asked hopefully. “No pressure! I just thought it would be nice, we could just hang out, get some food, I dunno, you know, just-” You cut him off by pressing your lips to his. You pulled away and smiled at him softly.

“I’d like that.”

A smile broke out across his face and he kissed you one last time before you both drifted off to a peaceful slumber. You can’t remember exactly when you fell asleep but it was with a glimmer of hope and happiness in your heart and despite the growing darkness, the nights became a little less long for you after that.

[jstarwrites]

"Save Me" (Chapter 1)

Pairing: Prompto x OC Rating: M Trigger warnings: mentions of rape, mention of torture (not depicted in story, only mentioned I promise) Tagging @g0ldpainted (let me know if you want to be tagged too!“

Chapter 1

My body is weak by the time he’s finished with me and all I can do is keep my eyes focused on the floor. He leaves without a word, shocking since he always has some smartass thing to say, and I try to shift into a different position. My lower half is sore from all of the abuse with bruises in the shape of fingers on my hips and thighs. Everything hurts and I want to die.

When Insomnia fell, I had been taken as prisoner by the Niffs and given to the empire as a prize. They keep me hidden away from the rest of the world, where I am subjected to abuse regularly. If it were up to the Six I would ask for death, for it would be preferable to being raped and tortured nearly every day.

I drag myself into my thin mattress with the springs poking out. The chill of this prison cell is getting to me, I swear something on my body is turning blue. The door to the cell swings open and it’s an unfamiliar face that greets me. Typically one of the maids will send me a small tray of food afterwards, scraps mainly, for me to "feast” on. Her fair hair, and black and red regalia distinguish her from the maids who usually visit.

“Shit, it’s worse than I thought,” she says. She slowly walks over to me, heels clicking against the cement. “We need to get you out of here as soon as possible.” I can’t will myself to move from my bed, so she grabs my arm and pulls me out.

I stumble out of bed and into her arms. My throat is bone dry from screaming and a lack of water, and my body is weak from not eating for about three days now. If I could manage to talk right now I would ask her so many questions. My savior leads me out of my cell and down the hallway, only stopping to grab a blanket to cover me. “Biggs, Wedge, provide a distraction for me,” she says, pushing me along.

“You got it boss!” The two leave at her command and she continues leading me away.

“If I had known that the empire was holding a hostage in Carnatica, I would’ve came sooner. Thankfully the maids are blabber mouths and they spoke freely for a small amount of gil,” she says. She removed the blanket from my face once we’re outside. The sunlight is blinding and all I can do is squint. “We’re gonna get you as far away from here as possible. Goal is Lestallum, maybe even Hammerhead if necessary.”

I grab her shoulder and squeeze it, since my throat is still so dry and I just cough. She turns to me with a sympathetic look. “My name is Aranea.” My eyes widen. The Niffleheim commodore? Why is she helping me? “Don’t give me that look. I’m here to help you out.”

Aranea leads me away from my prison and towards a train station, and then sneaks me onto one of the train cars. “This train is down for maintenance. I’ll be back. In the meantime, make yourself comfortable.” She leaves me behind in the train car so I sit down on the floor. I can’t even bare to look at myself or try to; I don’t want to see myself after the months of captivity.

When I look down at the rest of my body, I’m disgusted. My skin is grimy and my old dress is dirty to the point where it will never be saved. I though my hair and it’s greasy and knotted. While I was locked away, I never thought about how I looked. I lay back on the richly carpeted floor and close my eyes, letting a few tears slip out.

For months I remained in captivity at the hands of monsters and I numbed the pain as much as one could. But now I get the chance to cry for once. What will happen to me after this, though? The chancellor will notice I’m missing and who knows what he’ll do. I stretch out on the carpeted floor. My body cracks with the movement.

I don’t know how much time has passed when Aranea returns, grumbling to herself about something. “I brought you food and some new clothes. There should be soap and stuff in the bathroom for whenever you clean yourself up,” she says. I turn to face her, my body creaking yet again. Should I even try to speak now?

“Thank you,” I reply. My voice cracks, and it’s so hoarse that I can barely recognize it. Aranea looks at me clearly surprised.

“You can thank me later. I’m still trying to find you a ride away from here but the only people I can reliably call on aren’t even close by, and I doubt they’ll be able to turn back any time soon. Get cleaned up and I’ll make food in the meantime.”

Food? Fresh food? I swear my mouth would be watering if I hadn’t been kept away so long that my saliva dried up. I slowly stand up and make my way to the bathroom to finally bathe. My clothes are in shreds when I remove then and I toss them into the garbage. There’s no need for them anymore. I turn the faucet in the tub to start the water, cranking the heat up high to the point that it’s scalding. Then I put in the plug so the water doesn’t drain. I step into the porcelain bathtub and sink down into the water. Hopefully things continue to change for the better.

[jstar1992]

Hey, can we address the number of rape fics in the ffxv fandom? And can we also discuss the fact that it’s triggering and how rape shouldn’t be a plot point like it is in those fics?

As a rape survivor, it’s disappointing to go into a tag for a character I like and being subjected to fics of that character being raped or raping the reader or OC. It’s disgusting, and I expected better from the final fantasy fandom

[jstarwrites]

Prompto: [smiles]

FFXV Fandom: My soul has been cleansed. My crops have been watered. My pets have been fed. I am reborn.

[jstarwrites]

I'm gonna try to finish chapter 2 tonight of "Stand By Me" so that I can type it ASAP and post it! I've been hella busy with work and stuff recently lol

[jstarwrites]

I've been trying to work on "Stand by Me," but I just started a new job. So I'm trying to make money and finish this chapter so you all can enjoy! Sorry if it's slow to update!

[kierralondon-deactivated2019102]

What also makes me so sad about the fact that peppermint didn't win was that for peppermint that money could have gone towards a lot of piece of mind for her transition and I'm like it's just so .....?

LITERALLY lmao w/ that kind of money #girlslikeus can get all of the surgery on our wishlist, pay for hormones, and more. anyways donate to Peppermint’s documentary fund: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/help-us-finish-project-peppermint-lgbt#/

it’s only 18% funded w/ like two weeks to go so that should tell you how much ppl support the artistic endeavors of the girls regardless of how popular and visible we are 😩

[promptothesunshineboy-blog]

Who wants a love letter from Prompto in their inbox?

Slap that reblog button and Prompto will write to you~ <3

[owlteria-archive]

my precious son

[stylishchocobutt]

This is so relatable, I have to reblog it again. </3 Breaks my heart every time.