Jules

Cowabummer, man…

[corvid-language-library]

The sooner you start, the sooner you'll be done with it and the sooner you can stop thinking about it. Go on, up you get, it won't be as bad as you think.

[corvid-language-library]

You won't want to do it later either. You might as well just do it now. Even if you don't finish it all, anything you manage to get done now is something you don't have to do later (when you still won't want to do it)

[julessuretries]

I think the Chimptopia indie pilot trailer/pitch thing explains exactly what my issue is when conservatives attempt to make art, especially in our divisive political climate. They view art as so inherently political (which don't get me wrong, it is) but to such an extreme that everything creative immediately becomes propaganda. Nothing can actually be taken as a creative's genuine attempt to express a struggle, theme, idea, or question because "NO! It's about WOKE-IFYING the masses!!!" Which then makes it impossible for them to actually make anything interesting and real because they constantly have to police their own work for the exact messages they're sending to make sure it's anti-woke instead of just using art to express themselves like its meant to do. This creates an insufferable and boring panopticon no one wants to create under which I feel like is why so many of them resort to "self-aware" comedy/parody genres that rely heavily on making jabs at things they don't like.

Their mindset around creativity is so subtractive that it's always like "alright unlike these dirty LIBERALS we're gonna make a story that doesn't have all this woke crap" only to realize that it's pretty hard to a guide a narrative and make something interesting when you're solely working through a mentality of "any story is fine just as long as it isn't woke". But stories are meant TO say something, not to NOT say something. Many conservative creatives fail to understand that which is how we end up with the regurgitative "WOKE IS CRINGE RIGHT GUYS???" that has nothing original to say like the New Norm.

[julessuretries]

I think this is a vague enough post about TADC that I can make it before the finale airs on YouTube but I think the one thing I really wish had been explored more in the show was the side of Pomni that was willing and able to beat the crap out of Jax in the gun episode. I know it wasn't real violence and all that but, still. You gotta have a specific kind of bite to you to choke someone out like that and I wish we had learned more about her personality/backstory/whatever it was that made her that way.

[julessuretries]

I feel a pre-emptive pity for Digital Circus simply because there's no possible way the finale can live up to the astronomical hype that was built around the show since day 1.

I've been a big fan of TADC since it came out and always thought it was very creative, original, and inspired. However, I also felt it got excessively, excessively glazed online. As in, I would regularly see thumbnails on YT videos talking about how TADC was a "modern masterpiece", on its way to become a "timeless classic", and, of course, "singlehandedly destroying Disney/Netflix/[insert Big Studio here]". I know some of those videos were to farm views but I think a lot of them were genuine, which was odd to me because how can you say something like that when less than half the episodes for the series are out?? Like yeah dawg I'm a fan too but are we not getting ahead of ourselves here? When there's still half the show's runtime left to go and things could absolutely go downhill, or, you know, just not live up to the impossible expectations people developed for it in the six month gap between the cliffhanger at the end of the pilot and episode two??

I'm going to be honest, as someone who's seen spoilers for the finale, I'm worried that it's not going to tie everything up neatly (although tbh I don't think I needed to see the spoilers to think that since I admit I was getting worried the show was offloading it's plot to the last minute since episode 7). That's not me saying it's going to be disastrous by any means, but I have this nagging feeling that once it comes out and doesn't live up to the immense hype the Internet^tm cultivated around the series (because that would be impossible for literally any show to do), people are going to do a 180 spin on it and we're gonna get the inevitable "TADC was trash and here's why" videos when, like, maybe if people had any actual patience and media literacy they wouldn't have built up the show to be the next Matrix or Breaking Bad or whatever other genre-defining entry they wanted it to be until it had, I don't know, actually managed to finish its narrative?

Idk maybe I'll be wrong. But I guess we'll have to wait and see.

[julessuretries]

so I watched it and... yeah, I liked it. Some aspects were hard to accept as part of the plot because they were kind of depressing, but I also think that's what made them resonate with me? I think the show, at the end of the day, posed interesting questions with certain characters (take a wild guess which), and I think that's, like, important in the grand scope of media, actually?

I try not to rope personal baggage into things I watch, because I hate getting projection-y, but as once a former "difficult kid" I think I'll always have a soft spot for stories that aren't afraid to display morally dubious characters that you aren't explicitly told how to feel about. You kind of have to just watch their stories unfold and contend with difficult questions like "how much can I attribute this to real trauma they've experienced?" and "how much do I acknowledge them as free agents capable of choosing to do right or do wrong?". It's always a messy topic to discuss, especially in modern-day internet climate because people want clean-cut answers to everything, when the reality is that things can be quite messy.

Viktor Frankl said in Man's Search for Meaning that: "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."

That space is a hard thing to get a grasp on, and some people only grasp it too late, if at all.

[asneakyfox]

what "death of the author" means:

a lot of people think the only point of engagement with art is just to decode exactly what the author was trying to say, and their intent is the "real meaning," and once you've figured out the real meaning you're done you've solved it. that's dumb and boring. don't do that.

things death of the author does not mean:

every interpretation is equally valid

you are forbidden to treat what we can know or reasonably guess about the author's intentions as something that matters to your interpretation at all

the only valid way to interpret fiction is to treat it like it's a documentary of events that really happened and never think about it in terms of "why would the creator, a human person, choose to present it this way"

authors shouldn't get to have opinions about what they intended to say through their work, they should shut up and let me tell them what it means because i know better

actually i, the person reading or watching or viewing this art, am the infallible source of real meaning, and everybody who disagrees with me is wrong including but not limited to the author

the audience is the infallible source of real meaning, not the author, and that's why they committed a war crime by not treating my own headcanons as authoritative

[na-chloridee]

I forgot how to draw wotah

TC I need sea of sorro

[julessuretries]

my dad liked my 3D printed Rocky so I asked my friend to print another one but then I forgot I had put it in my backpack and one pothole later it got crushed. Poor Rocky, man.

Anyways, I might give my dad the one I already have, but it's weirdly difficult. I've never been that into figurines or merchandise in general, but I accidentally formed an emotional attachment to my Rocky figurine simply because I got him while studying for a biiiiig exam and I would keep him by my laptop as my study buddy. It's silly but my brain occasionally does that lol.

[julessuretries]

I feel a pre-emptive pity for Digital Circus simply because there's no possible way the finale can live up to the astronomical hype that was built around the show since day 1.

I've been a big fan of TADC since it came out and always thought it was very creative, original, and inspired. However, I also felt it got excessively, excessively glazed online. As in, I would regularly see thumbnails on YT videos talking about how TADC was a "modern masterpiece", on its way to become a "timeless classic", and, of course, "singlehandedly destroying Disney/Netflix/[insert Big Studio here]". I know some of those videos were to farm views but I think a lot of them were genuine, which was odd to me because how can you say something like that when less than half the episodes for the series are out?? Like yeah dawg I'm a fan too but are we not getting ahead of ourselves here? When there's still half the show's runtime left to go and things could absolutely go downhill, or, you know, just not live up to the impossible expectations people developed for it in the six month gap between the cliffhanger at the end of the pilot and episode two??

I'm going to be honest, as someone who's seen spoilers for the finale, I'm worried that it's not going to tie everything up neatly (although tbh I don't think I needed to see the spoilers to think that since I admit I was getting worried the show was offloading it's plot to the last minute since episode 7). That's not me saying it's going to be disastrous by any means, but I have this nagging feeling that once it comes out and doesn't live up to the immense hype the Internet^tm cultivated around the series (because that would be impossible for literally any show to do), people are going to do a 180 spin on it and we're gonna get the inevitable "TADC was trash and here's why" videos when, like, maybe if people had any actual patience and media literacy they wouldn't have built up the show to be the next Matrix or Breaking Bad or whatever other genre-defining entry they wanted it to be until it had, I don't know, actually managed to finish its narrative?

Idk maybe I'll be wrong. But I guess we'll have to wait and see.

[julessuretries]

I dont go on reddit that often but sometimes there is indeed gold

[charlataninred]

Character duo where one *remembers I don’t like fitting characters into trope boxes* is a completely fleshed out and realised person *remembers treating characters as real people and not story devices written with intent is bad* who is written by the author and *remembers death of the author* uh. And *fumbles and drops my pile of queue cards* ah fuck wait no *the menacing horse* what was that.

[julessuretries]

So I finished writing the first draft of my novel a month ago and I am weirdly... not excited about fixing it up, which is odd for me because I usually love editing. For any project I've done in the past, the hard part has almost always been the scaffolding, figuring out what's gonna go where, etc. Once I get that part done I'm usually good to go, and don't find myself having too much difficulty handling everything that comes after.

But now... I don't know, I'm scared. It's hard. I don't want to work on my project because it feels like there SO much to fix.

And it's not, like, an ego thing, where I can't handle the idea that after all the effort I put into this story it might still need some hefty overhauls. It's more just, like, I don't know where or how to approach stuff. I've never worked on a story of this scope- 110k words. My previous stories have all been 5k words or less and now... here I am. It's just hard to even see where things are supposed to fit because I can't capture the story as a whole within my field of view. It's just too big.

I've broken down the draft into three acts, which I think has helped me get some grasp on what's going on, but ugh... there's a lot of work ahead of me before I make something I feel is cohesive.

Part of me wishes I spent more time preparing my story ahead of time. I really threw myself into the deep end even though I only knew, like, two out of the five main characters and the very basics of how I wanted the story to start and end.

On the other hand, I'm glad I at least started. That was a very scary thing to do, and I'm glad I didn't get stuck in the pre-production loop.

[julessuretries]

update on this: I'm about 1/3 of the way through Act 1 and I'm feeling better about it

I think maybe I just needed to get in the flow of things and that was the main issue... we'll have to see though, since Act 1 is the act I have the most figured out. Acts 2 and 3 are a bit rougher in terms of plotting + pacing.

[dykeselfcest]

it is unfortunate that there's no reason for most people to remember high school chemistry because the best analogy I have found for "the amount of energy that it takes me to initiate a task, which can be higher than the amount of energy it takes to actually complete the task" is "activation energy" and it's not precisely perfect but

yeah. and you can even include "thing that reduces the barrier to doing the task" as a catalyst/enzyme

anyway. unfortunately this does not actually clarify anything for the average person. but #ToMe it works

[julessuretries]

catalysts/enzymes can include:

-body doubling with other people

-mentally allowing yourself to do the task messily/imperfectly (this one is GOLD -> lowers the barrier to pretty much every task ever)

-accompanying said task with a little treat

-delegating part of the task to someone else

-playing music (I like doing this at the start of a hard task, and then phasing out the music when I'm into the task enough that I no longer need it)

[julessuretries]

taking an exam that encompasses everything I've learned in the past two years is anxiety inducing, yes. I am honestly fighting the urge to crash out nearly every single day.

HOWEVER!

I think it's developing my character and teaching me how to manage stress. No matter what, I have to show up and study. That's literally all I can do, and it's not going to pay off all in one day or even in one week. It's a test of patience and learning to just show up. Sometimes you just have to trust the process and believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel. In addition, you have to find ways to keep yourself regulated in the process. I've been making time to read in the morning and work out at least a few times week. I've also been reaching out to friends to study with so I'm not totally alone during the process.

That being said...

God help me!!!!

[liones-s]

one of the most boring lessons I’ve learned is that when a task feels overwhelming, you just have to start doing it. Even if you’re not sure how to do 90% of it, look for one small component that seems close and start there. Sometimes it’s reading one article on the topic, or searching one related term, or literally just googling how to do the task. Do anything other than thinking about it. The process of working on a thing inherently makes it less scary.

[without-ado]

Full Moon in April l Seong Mo Lee

[julessuretries]

let my dad borrow my copy of Project Hail Mary and he finished it a few days ago. I've since caught him watching every trailer, clip, and behind the scenes footage he can get his hands on. Before going to bed tonight he opened the door to the office space I've been using to study and said "amaze amaze amaze" so now I'm dragging him to the movie theater tomorrow to see it because despite his insane frugality I know he's gonna lose his mind if he waits for it comes out on streaming

[julessuretries]

update: we saw it and he really liked it, especially how they used a puppet for Rocky

on my end, I feel like seeing the movie a second time really allowed me to appreciate new aspects of it. I didn't pay much attention to the score the first time around but IT IS SO GOOD???

[julessuretries]

let my dad borrow my copy of Project Hail Mary and he finished it a few days ago. I've since caught him watching every trailer, clip, and behind the scenes footage he can get his hands on. Before going to bed tonight he opened the door to the office space I've been using to study and said "amaze amaze amaze" so now I'm dragging him to the movie theater tomorrow to see it because despite his insane frugality I know he's gonna lose his mind if he waits for it comes out on streaming