It's been so long since a have been on this website. Lot of this have changed. My age, my mind, my heart, the way a see the things, lot of new topics that I've listening through this year's have been on my head for a while. I'm trying to make me a better person in lot of ways, but it takes time to see that others people actions affects you in lot of ways that you never see it coming. It's hard to be true to yourself when you see that people doesn't think the way you do, and sometimes makes you feel you're wrong, when you are not. You just have more emphaty to the situations in life, than the others. It's sad that you feel you are wrong because other people doesn't explain to you what's happening in the moment. It's sad to feel you are not worth enough to someone to actually sit with you and explain step by step, each other's minds. It's sad when you start thinking you'll never be enough to anybody. Just because you didn't find something especial with someone you wanted that everything worked out. You start to think about everything, about the past, about how the things never worked for you and how you feel it never will. I wanna end this year feeling different. It's been a while being alone, with no affection, with nothing but love of family and friends, but it is never worth it because you want to feel love in a different way you know you will never have. I'm full of love with myself, I know my worth but at the same time i feel horrible when I see that I'm still not good enough for anybody to stay. I'm brave, I know I am, but there's always a moment when I'm still waiting for someone to see me with eyes full of love. The waiting is still long. I'm trying not to be that hard on the people I met. Trying to let it be, but at the same time I don't wanna low my expectations on a person that I know I deserve. It's hard, and nowadays it's even harder, when love is already something that not to much people know about what it really is. It's sad to feel that I don't need to think about that because it makes me sad, when the thoughts are ALWAYS there, in my head. This is a note to myself. Someday, someone will make you feel worth enough, more than you ever thought... It will take a while, but it will come. Yes, you've been waiting for so long, but here you are... With strength enough to be open to your heart. Don't lose hope, you're are already lucky because all of the things you have and what you are. It's okay to feel like this sometimes, feel like you have it all but yet there's a missing peace in your heart. It will take time, but it will happen one day. Someone it's going to see you as the only person in the world they wanna be with. Be patient. I know you've always will, but try a little bit more... It will be worth it. With love, someone that cares about you a lot and feels you like no other will. Yourself. First time opening my heart like this, absolutely yes, it's going to be my new therapy. I need to let go my worries in some way. So here I am, maybe it sounds stupid bc it seems that only care about being with someone in life, but it is really hard when you a surrounded by people being in love, and you haven't feel never that way. It's makes you think something is bad with when it isn't. It just have different time, for you.
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
andulkaphoto
vaporwave
2087
