Are you strange, like me?

A blank slate.

[coolgreenthings]

[kushandwizdom]

That part

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

Other people’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.

Les Brown (via psych-facts)

[yoursummerdreamz]

[justamainstreamguy]

You should vent our your feelings.. Its okay not to be okay but don't end your life. It's okay to let them see you're weak, so you'll get the help you need from them. Someone will always understand what you're going through. I know I do, and it sucks I know. But please do seek help from your friends, family etc. Let them know you need them. And yeah may you smile while reading this cause I hope and pray that you'll have a great day. :)

You see, anon, I've actually tried that... or else I wouldn't have nothing to base the "no one to run to" part. But I do appreciate what you're trying to do. Thank you. 🙂

[justamainstreamguy]

7-14-16 3:39 AM

I guess I should call it an achievement to make it through half the year without actually ending myself... successfully. But I did try (again), twice. The first time I tried it, a really great friend of mine (kinda) kept me on the ground. We had this “plan” to end it by the moment we meet, I agreed to this plan so I postponed it. We didn’t get the chance to do it (obviously), because things started to fall apart on her end, but doing it would make the situation worse. The second time was a day after I came home from an out of town trip with this friend. I was alone, drunk, and I saw the pills that I’ve kept for so long. I almost took it, but I was so wasted that I ended up throwing up and forgetting about it completely. 

So far, this year’s proving to be brutal and I found myself doing things I shouldn’t be doing. I turned to drinking (for the actual purpose of getting drunk and wasted), cigarettes, going to bars almost every night, fooling around with women, and getting high. I’d do everything just so that I won’t be alone with my mind, just so that I can block out the demons inside my head that’s been really persistent at dragging me down. Every day is just a constant battle with these demons. I wake up and these fellas are the first ones to greet me. With no one to run to, I go along with my day, like nothing’s wrong. Everyone has their own battles and I don’t want to bother anyone else with my ‘dramas’, no one will understand anyway. And I don’t think this will change. These demons will be inside my head and I’ll go through the same shit again. Wake up, get up, go through my day, lie down, prepare to sleep, end the day, the next day starts, the cycle continues. But recently, it’s been draining me. All this pretending to be okay shit is tiring, but I have to keep on doing it, it’s what people expect from me. It’s what people think of me, the happy-go-lucky guy. The one who’s rarely stressed out. The ‘strong one’. So I guess I’ll just have to keep on pretending to be okay even though I’m slowly starting to destroy myself in the process. I’m okay, well I’m not, and I don’t think I will ever be, but it’s okay.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

I don’t think people understand how stressful it is to explain what’s going on in your head when you don’t even understand it yourself.

Sara Quin (via psych-facts)

[justamainstreamguy]

I don't know why, but I started to develop a fear of writing. Besides the fact that I'm shitty at it, it shows parts of me that I'm trying to hide or even forget. That's why I haven't written anything, even physically, because I don't want to reach into the deepest corners of my mind again.

[astound]

[badtimez-deactivated20151004]

[words-of-emotion]

“ My mission: be so busy loving my life that I have no time for hate, regret, worrying, fret, or fear. ”

https://twitter.com/goodquoteco (via words-of-emotion)

[words-of-emotion]

“ Life is weird. You can go from being strangers, to being friends, to being more than friends, to being practically strangers again. ”

https://twitter.com/goodquoteco (via words-of-emotion)

[kushandwizdom]

Don’t create problems if there are none.

http://twitter.com/goodquoteco (via kushandwizdom)

[thegoodvibeco]

[justamainstreamguy]

Kinda timely tbh

[justamainstreamguy]

We were a perfect match. Maybe that’s why we burnt out.

[words-of-emotion]

once upon a time, in a land where everything is temporary, i thought feeling loved would last

Unknown (via words-of-emotion)

[kushandwizdom]

You'll get over it. Time is a healer, remember.

[justamainstreamguy]

Blank

I wanted to write my thoughts away, type it I mean. But I don’t know where to start. All that’s in my mind is a constant stream of nothingness. Maybe I’m starting to learn how to be numb.