Hi ballet tumblr, my favorite corner of this website - how is everyone? Anyone still there? If you are, I'd love to know :)
I created this blog when I was 15. Ballet was my whole world, I was swallowed up by it, equal parts in love and in conflict. I worked hard, got to that tipping point when you're 18 and it's time to make big decisions. I lost faith it could be possible, lost my confidence after a particualrly hard year in a harsh training environment.
So I left. And for about 6 years, I kept ballet a huge part of my life. Worked at a studio, took class 3-4 times a week, stretched, cross trained here and there, kept dancing and appreciating the deep community and ritual that come with training, even at the adult recreational level. But life got in the way... always an excuse right? I made sure of that. Relationships, jobs, moving across the country. I haven't taken class in almost 2 years now. I can't believe I'm even saying it. But I dream about ballet, every week, sometimes more.
In my dreams I'm still moving and flowing through space, nailing quad pirouettes and throwing myself intp complex partnering sequences without a care in the world. While I could never do 4 pirouettes to begin with, I could dance pretty darn well and I loved it more than anything. And there's a hole in my life, an empty space that I know only ballet can fill.
It's time to come back. If ballet tumblr is still a thing, I'll spend time here for accountability and inspiration. Ballet on instagram makes me depressed for the most part, but also jealous and resentful. Maybe here it's still about artistry, and appreciating the dancers who came before us, honoring their legacy in the way we strive to live and move.
So if anyone's still here, please say hello! I'm going to take class for the first time in 2 years next Friday, I promise. I'll report back when I'm done :)
