i no longer use any of my blogs but i’ve kept them up so my old works can still be enjoyed!! i do have another blog under a different name and plan to repurpose some of my old works in the future on there. if u happen to stumble across one, just know it’s not plagiarism 😭 i’m just unoriginal and emotionally attached to some of them. i appreciate all the love and support i’ve received through these blogs over the years!! alas it is time for me to bid my farewell and part ways with these eras of my life..
WARNINGS mature language but are we surprised, the tamest thing i’ve written in what feels like years, uni!au, best friends to lovers, mutual pining but younghoon is kinda dumb and very dramatic, one (1) kiss scene but thats about it
SUMMARY younghoon has been in love with you since what feels like the dawn of time. he’s watched you fall for the wrong guys over and over again, too much of a coward to do anything about it. but you’re on the brink of graduation and he’s finally ready to let you know. he just hopes you feel the same.
MORE hi…. how yall doin…. LOL the juyeonszn comeback no one was expecting 🥳 i’ve been in a bit of a younghoon phase lately and i realized i was not showing him enough love so i present to u this lovely piece of younghoonery <3 this is also my submission for the @deoboyznet love letter collective event! huge thank u to @sungbeam for beta’ing i owe u my life beam </3
Maybe he should’ve told you how he felt about you during your dinner before prom senior year. The words sat on the tip of his tongue, waiting to be spoken into existence. It was the perfect moment. You were each other’s dates anyway.
But then he chickened out—he didn’t think he deserved you. And perhaps that was only slightly true: for letting you slip through his fingers numerous times? Absolutely. But for everything else? The universe couldn’t help but pity him, too.
There was also the time that your ex boyfriend cheated on you and you came crying to him in the middle of the night. He woke up and stayed awake until early hours of the morning just to comfort you. It wasn’t because he felt bad, but because he would do any and everything for you. While you curled in on yourself, cuddled into the safety of his arms, he debated telling you then, too.
Time and time again, Younghoon has sat there and watched as you dated different guys. He sucks it up and deals with it because he’s afraid of rejection, but he also doesn’t want to ruin your friendship. You’ve been best friends since middle school, and that made him afraid that you’d always only see him as that. There was that saying that girls and guys could never just be friends. Unfortunately, that was the case for him, but maybe not for you.
Now here you are, the day before your college graduation, and Younghoon is once again torn between mustering up the courage to confess and putting this puppy love to rest.
He told himself during your first year of university if he didn’t tell you at all during these four years, he would give up. You were both preparing for true adulthood and if he couldn’t lay himself bare for the person closest to him, he didn’t think it was meant to be. And well, time is running out for him. He had to speak now, or forever hold his peace.
Younghoon watches as you scamper around your apartment, gathering your things for graduation tomorrow. It was a hectic enough day without you worrying if you were going to lose something, or run late. You hang your cap and gown on the coat hook near your front door before dashing back into your room to make sure your outfit is put together.
Even in the chaos of your zooming around, Younghoon still finds you absolutely breathtaking. You’re slightly sweating from all of your movement and from the heat of the rapidly approaching summer, but nevertheless, you look so beautiful to him. The decision that seemed so hard to make over the years feels pointless. The answer has been clear from the beginning.
“Y/N.”
You pause what you’re doing to look over at him, wiping your forehead with the back of your hand. Your cute, caught-off-guard expression has him nearly melting into the couch. He doesn’t understand why it took him so long to get it together.
Your eyebrows furrow in confusion when he starts walking towards you. “Wha— Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine,” he says, his frame towering over you in a way that is never intimidating, only comforting. “I have something I need to tell you, though.”
“Can it wait? I’m a little busy here.” Your hands come to rest on your hips and it takes all of the strength inside of Younghoon to not pull you into his embrace and kiss you. He thinks he would die, and he has to survive the duration of this confession if he wants to see the other side. (The side where, hopefully, you finally become his, in the way he’s wanted for years.)
“It can’t, actually,” he breathes, a newfound, unwavering confidence taking over. “I think I’ve waited for too long.”
“You’re kinda scaring me,” you laugh, scratching the back of your neck. “What is it, Hoon?”
Speak now or forever hold your damn peace, Kim Younghoon.
“Y/N, I love you,” he starts, and when you open your mouth to say you already know that, he continues. “And not in the way I’ve told you since we were eleven. I love you in the way that I can’t go to sleep at night without wondering if you’re sleeping comfortably, too. I can’t wake up in the morning without wondering if you did that cute, little whine that you do when your alarm goes off. I think about my future constantly, even though it’s fucking terrifying, and you’re always in it. Not just as my best friend or my partner in crime, but as my forever partner, too. I’ve felt this way about for god knows how long now, but I’ve always just been too afraid of what it would do to our friendship if you didn’t see me the same way. I don’t want to sit back and watch you date these other guys who end up hurting you anymore. I want to be the one you go to for everything.”
When he finishes, his chest is heaving a little, practically spieling without taking a moment for air. Despite the strength he collected to say all of that out loud, he was still nervous and looked away from you as he did it. He’s making eye contact now though, and he’s freaking the fuck out because he can’t read you one bit.
You aren’t saying anything, just staring at him with your lips parted, and he thinks that's tenfold more frightening than if you were to yell and slap him in the face. Each second that passes in complete silence has his hands clamming up and his heart racing faster. He realizes how close he’s standing to you and takes a step back, and then another, then another, until he’s grabbing his things and scrambling to get out of your apartment.
You hate him. That has to be it. You see him as a brother more than anything else and he just ruined it all.
But the moment he steps foot into the hallway, you’re calling after him desperately.
“Younghoon, wait!”
Your voice, laced with emotion, has him halting in place. He turns around to see you standing in the threshold of your door, eyes welled with tears. He’s only ever seen you cry when you're sad, when you’re heartbroken, and he prays to whatever higher being exists that he didn’t do just that to you. (He tries to ignore how gorgeous you look even when crying.)
“I— You can’t just say all of that and run away!” You’re full on bawling now and it has his eyes widening. “You’re so stupid, you know that? I’ve been in love with you since we were thirteen and you lent me your hoodie inside of the movie theater when I said I was cold. You’ve always cared so deeply for me, so unconditionally. How could I not fall for you? You made it so hard not to.”
Younghoon is stunned. He had no idea you felt the same because you’ve been so good at hiding your feelings from him unless you chose to show him something. “Why did you date all those guys then?”
“To make you jealous, you idiot,” you sniffle, laughing at his obliviousness. “You’re such a guy; it’s endearing.”
He pouts at your low-key insult, but it doesn’t really upset him. In fact, he feels like he’s soaring right now. Your feelings are mutual and it’s as if all is well in the world. He closes the space between you once again, lifting his arm to swipe away your tears. You nuzzle into his palm instinctively and he’s sure he’s a puddle on the ground.
“Can— Can I kiss you?” He braves himself to ask, searching your features for any indication that you didn’t want this. You nod, your own hand covering his. The sparkle in your eyes is more than enough confirmation for him and so he leans in.
When your lips meet, Younghoon wonders if he did something heroic in a past life. He feels a pleasant buzz all the way to the tips of his fingers. It’s everything he’s dreamed of.
WARNINGS mature language but are we surprised, the tamest thing i’ve written in what feels like years, uni!au, best friends to lovers, mutual pining but younghoon is kinda dumb and very dramatic, one (1) kiss scene but thats about it
SUMMARY younghoon has been in love with you since what feels like the dawn of time. he’s watched you fall for the wrong guys over and over again, too much of a coward to do anything about it. but you’re on the brink of graduation and he’s finally ready to let you know. he just hopes you feel the same.
MORE hi…. how yall doin…. LOL the juyeonszn comeback no one was expecting 🥳 i’ve been in a bit of a younghoon phase lately and i realized i was not showing him enough love so i present to u this lovely piece of younghoonery <3 this is also my submission for the @deoboyznet love letter collective event! huge thank u to @sungbeam for beta’ing i owe u my life beam </3
Maybe he should’ve told you how he felt about you during your dinner before prom senior year. The words sat on the tip of his tongue, waiting to be spoken into existence. It was the perfect moment. You were each other’s dates anyway.
But then he chickened out—he didn’t think he deserved you. And perhaps that was only slightly true: for letting you slip through his fingers numerous times? Absolutely. But for everything else? The universe couldn’t help but pity him, too.
There was also the time that your ex boyfriend cheated on you and you came crying to him in the middle of the night. He woke up and stayed awake until early hours of the morning just to comfort you. It wasn’t because he felt bad, but because he would do any and everything for you. While you curled in on yourself, cuddled into the safety of his arms, he debated telling you then, too.
Time and time again, Younghoon has sat there and watched as you dated different guys. He sucks it up and deals with it because he’s afraid of rejection, but he also doesn’t want to ruin your friendship. You’ve been best friends since middle school, and that made him afraid that you’d always only see him as that. There was that saying that girls and guys could never just be friends. Unfortunately, that was the case for him, but maybe not for you.
Now here you are, the day before your college graduation, and Younghoon is once again torn between mustering up the courage to confess and putting this puppy love to rest.
He told himself during your first year of university if he didn’t tell you at all during these four years, he would give up. You were both preparing for true adulthood and if he couldn’t lay himself bare for the person closest to him, he didn’t think it was meant to be. And well, time is running out for him. He had to speak now, or forever hold his peace.
Younghoon watches as you scamper around your apartment, gathering your things for graduation tomorrow. It was a hectic enough day without you worrying if you were going to lose something, or run late. You hang your cap and gown on the coat hook near your front door before dashing back into your room to make sure your outfit is put together.
Even in the chaos of your zooming around, Younghoon still finds you absolutely breathtaking. You’re slightly sweating from all of your movement and from the heat of the rapidly approaching summer, but nevertheless, you look so beautiful to him. The decision that seemed so hard to make over the years feels pointless. The answer has been clear from the beginning.
“Y/N.”
You pause what you’re doing to look over at him, wiping your forehead with the back of your hand. Your cute, caught-off-guard expression has him nearly melting into the couch. He doesn’t understand why it took him so long to get it together.
Your eyebrows furrow in confusion when he starts walking towards you. “Wha— Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine,” he says, his frame towering over you in a way that is never intimidating, only comforting. “I have something I need to tell you, though.”
“Can it wait? I’m a little busy here.” Your hands come to rest on your hips and it takes all of the strength inside of Younghoon to not pull you into his embrace and kiss you. He thinks he would die, and he has to survive the duration of this confession if he wants to see the other side. (The side where, hopefully, you finally become his, in the way he’s wanted for years.)
“It can’t, actually,” he breathes, a newfound, unwavering confidence taking over. “I think I’ve waited for too long.”
“You’re kinda scaring me,” you laugh, scratching the back of your neck. “What is it, Hoon?”
Speak now or forever hold your damn peace, Kim Younghoon.
“Y/N, I love you,” he starts, and when you open your mouth to say you already know that, he continues. “And not in the way I’ve told you since we were eleven. I love you in the way that I can’t go to sleep at night without wondering if you’re sleeping comfortably, too. I can’t wake up in the morning without wondering if you did that cute, little whine that you do when your alarm goes off. I think about my future constantly, even though it’s fucking terrifying, and you’re always in it. Not just as my best friend or my partner in crime, but as my forever partner, too. I’ve felt this way about for god knows how long now, but I’ve always just been too afraid of what it would do to our friendship if you didn’t see me the same way. I don’t want to sit back and watch you date these other guys who end up hurting you anymore. I want to be the one you go to for everything.”
When he finishes, his chest is heaving a little, practically spieling without taking a moment for air. Despite the strength he collected to say all of that out loud, he was still nervous and looked away from you as he did it. He’s making eye contact now though, and he’s freaking the fuck out because he can’t read you one bit.
You aren’t saying anything, just staring at him with your lips parted, and he thinks that's tenfold more frightening than if you were to yell and slap him in the face. Each second that passes in complete silence has his hands clamming up and his heart racing faster. He realizes how close he’s standing to you and takes a step back, and then another, then another, until he’s grabbing his things and scrambling to get out of your apartment.
You hate him. That has to be it. You see him as a brother more than anything else and he just ruined it all.
But the moment he steps foot into the hallway, you’re calling after him desperately.
“Younghoon, wait!”
Your voice, laced with emotion, has him halting in place. He turns around to see you standing in the threshold of your door, eyes welled with tears. He’s only ever seen you cry when you're sad, when you’re heartbroken, and he prays to whatever higher being exists that he didn’t do just that to you. (He tries to ignore how gorgeous you look even when crying.)
“I— You can’t just say all of that and run away!” You’re full on bawling now and it has his eyes widening. “You’re so stupid, you know that? I’ve been in love with you since we were thirteen and you lent me your hoodie inside of the movie theater when I said I was cold. You’ve always cared so deeply for me, so unconditionally. How could I not fall for you? You made it so hard not to.”
Younghoon is stunned. He had no idea you felt the same because you’ve been so good at hiding your feelings from him unless you chose to show him something. “Why did you date all those guys then?”
“To make you jealous, you idiot,” you sniffle, laughing at his obliviousness. “You’re such a guy; it’s endearing.”
He pouts at your low-key insult, but it doesn’t really upset him. In fact, he feels like he’s soaring right now. Your feelings are mutual and it’s as if all is well in the world. He closes the space between you once again, lifting his arm to swipe away your tears. You nuzzle into his palm instinctively and he’s sure he’s a puddle on the ground.
“Can— Can I kiss you?” He braves himself to ask, searching your features for any indication that you didn’t want this. You nod, your own hand covering his. The sparkle in your eyes is more than enough confirmation for him and so he leans in.
When your lips meet, Younghoon wonders if he did something heroic in a past life. He feels a pleasant buzz all the way to the tips of his fingers. It’s everything he’s dreamed of.
happy love letter release, deoboyznet! in honor of the boyz's recent comeback, we'd like to present our newest project: the love letter collective!
the theme for this event is memories and nostalgia, with each fic like a love letter to things that remind us of the past. for example, your fic could be an 80s au, feature a time capsule, or time travel... even something like falling in love with a childhood friend (👀).
only housemates are eligible to submit a fic for this event, so if you'd like to apply to become a housemate, you can find the info here! please ensure that your fic is completed by july 1st; doors will open on april 1st. once your work is completed, be sure to tag the net as usual and include #dbn: love letter in the tags as well.
things/aesthetic you associate with your moots please!
hi anonie!! it’s been a while since i’ve done tag games like this so LETS GAUR 🤩
im doing for the ones that i talk to most often ✨
@from-izzy my soulmate 🤞🏻(who clearly SHOULD be living in my city instead), sunricyeon!!, ✌🏻level-headed and ☝🏻dum-dum, purple 💜, bunnies 🐰, raccoons 🦝, in constant denial of her love life 😒, long calls & video calls, SAUR, music 🎶, “ALLY HELP ME 🥺”, fellow believer in God, concerts, has 19374848 plans to meet up but our studies/job preventing us to do so 😞 (but we will beat them and meet irl someday SOON BCS I MANIFEST)
@sungbeam my precious lil 妹妹 🫶🏻, blue 🩵, “hear me out….but another changmin potential wip/plot 🤡”, photocards, that wet tree rat pc, if talent was a person its her, care packages 📦, fellow introverts ✌🏻, the one who convinced me to purchase my sony headphones while we were videocalling in the store 🥹, my sleep paralysis demon, “ALLY JIEJIE”, my cutie wookie little sis 😔💗, but also goes 😐 whenever i talk abt sangyeon 🙄
@aimeecarreros the unhinged and wild one in the b*****, 1/4 of sangyeon’s whores, twerking ✨, the best gif maker ever 😤, “so elena…pretty pwease can you gif this for moi 🥺”, BBANGJU 👅, “CORREQUE ✌🏻”, insanely hilarious and unhinged memes and text messages 24/7, the moodmaker of the group, “haysss *inserts stripping meme*”, teasing me 24/7 🙄, pinterest, fashion 😍, bridal dresses 🤍
@snowflakewhispers the SAVAGE, maknae and the demon (lovingly) in the b*****, teasing me is her everyday job atp 🙄🙄🙄, mrs jacob bae, 1/4 of sangyeon’s whores, spitting fire 24/7 🔥, matching sony headphones 🤍, matching macbook colours 🩶, psych & kids 💗, the sunwoo to my eric, apparently is in a messed up relationship/situationship with someone who shall not be named 🦝, the moot who lives the closest to where i am 🥹 (so faster get your ass back here after uni ends)
@daisyvisions the unnie of the b*****, NAUR, that iconic zoom selfie 😌✨, constantly being distracted at work bcs of ✨unholy thoughts✨, podcast 🎧, 1/4 of sangyeon’s whores, also joined in on the fun with elena & ophelia on teasing moi 😔, jerry lee 🤤, doggo 🐶, newnudeshot 😏📸, photoism 🎞️, spongebob memes, BIG SEXC BRAIN 🧠, late night talks while working, always judging me for some reason 🙃
@justalildumpling my dongsaeng 👧🏻, sunricyeon!!, black 🖤, ptsd from windows turning from black to bright blue, “pull a j” aka doing and leaving assignments till the very last minute 😁, “guys…..”, “yall…..”, a simp 🤓, attracted to red flags men (but not anymore 😚), FOODIE CHINGUS, malatang, “guys….can we just call for like 20 mins max…i promise it won’t take long” = a 6-7hours call, late night (or early mornings) video calls, SHE IS A BEAUTY AN ICON AND SHE IS THE MOMENT 😍
@ethereal-engene my long-lost best friend 🥹, JU HAKNYEON 🍊, anime!!, men in glasses 🔛🔝, fellow chinese friend ❤️, cny 🧧, lion dances 🦁, WOOZI (ESP IN LONG HAIR 😩😩😩), matching hakkie pottery pcs 🤍, wips brainstorming ✍️, another cutie lil 妹妹 🥺, arms….and pecs 🤓, editing 👩💻, convos abt our studies/work life 💗
@kimsohn kim sunwoo, pinterest, “maya….i had a dream abt sangyeon….”, “oh!”, anime!!, that smiling and then speechless meme, sangyeon drenching himself in water 😀, “so when are you gonna write this”, sunric sluts, tbosas, coriolanus snow, always talking abt being on writers block with one another but eventually gets things done (and sometimes its long af), being caring 🥺, food!!
@quaissants 1/2 of my gremlins 👹, sends me lip gloss sangyeon 24/7, my twinnie 🤞🏻, same birthday & mbti 💗, speaks in such a soft manner like hello 🥺, genshin impact!!, ragnvindr bros ❤️💙, childe 🤓, angsty angst ❤️🩹, constantly looking out for me 🥹, men 😃, “i have selective reading”
@sanaxo-o another 1/2 of my gremlins 👹, unhinged as a person, sabrina carpenter 💗, flirty af but then i dont return the favour 😄, sends me sangyeon content 24/7, a great listener and gives me comfort, always checking up on others, ✌🏻level-headed and ☝🏻dum-dum, “LET ME BETA YOUR FICS”, pinterest, “Als”
@stealanity my unnie 🥺💗, always looking out for everyone, the big sister of the net, amazing as a person (i admire you loads), moodboards 😍, aesthetics ✨, a field of flowers 🌹🪻🌸🌺, brave (never afraid to speak up!!), i miss you sm unnie always 🫶🏻, calls me a cutie 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
@cloverdaisies CLO MY LOVE 💚, great britian 🇬🇧, fish & chips, “you have no rights ally ive revoked them”, “you dont love me anymore 🥺” aka clo’s way of making me feel guilty that i couldn’t visit her when i was back in EU (IT WILL HAPPEN ONE DAY I SWEAR I WILL BE BACK 😤😤😤), writing fics for one another 💗, STRONG ASS WOMAN 💪 (who juggles between work and uni all on her own 🥹🫂), “there’s a rat in my apartment”, phone & video calls (which we havent done in a while and we should again!!)
@juyeonszn my fawnie my bubba 🥹, coffee ☕️, zeneration livestream 🙌🏻, crying tgt, unboxing albums ✨, pcs collection, puppies 🐶, anime!!, big sexc brain 🧠, sunric sluts, INSANE MAKEUP LOOKS 😩, delulu is the solulu ✨, education 📚, never-ending talks on dc (which we haven’t done in a while i miss you loads 🥺), my fellow dancer 💃, if cutie was a person its fawnie 💗
@itsbeeble my pookie 🫶🏻, kim sunwoo, another big sexc brain 🧠, taylor swift 💛, eras tour ✨, “ALLY GO TO SLEEP”, eric sohn, ateez & svt!!, memes 24/7, exposing each other’s asses 😄, biker sunwoo 😩, delulu is the solulu ✨, another coffee buddy ☕️, talks abt uni/work life, always bouncing off ideas with one another
hi bae! i’m working on a school project regarding fanfiction, and i would like to know your reasons as to why you started writing (and continue writing) fanfiction :]]] i’ll make sure to keep your user anonymous if anything <3 thank you again!
hello!!!
as someone who plans to pursue a career in english, i think writing is something that has always come to me naturally. i started writing fanfiction right before middle school, so i was already in this weird transition phase of my life and discovering myself as a person. i’ve always had an imaginative mind and i’ve always enjoyed writing so i took a stab at it to see where it would lead.
of course, my prose was nowhere near where it is now, and i knew that at the time, but writing for me has essentially always been about self preservation and self gratification. i’ve gone through longer periods of time without having friends irl than i’ve had them so writing, even from the beginning, has been my main source of escapism. i’ve written for many many many different fandoms, so i think i’ve seen almost all aspects and genres of fanfiction.
just like everyone else, i’ve struggled with coming to terms with lack of interaction and lack of motivation, but also dissatisfaction with my own work. i’ve been through numerous writing hiatuses, but i find myself coming back every time because it’s just such a big part of me. i continue writing because it’s so fulfilling when i’m able to finish a fic and then sit back and think “wow, i did that…” you know? as much as i love sharing my work with others, it’s more satiating when i feel proud of myself.
u know what could heal the world rn?? come thru updates😢 just think abt it
JANDJEJDNENS come thru will come back soon trust,,,,, school has been a little crazy cause i’m taking a flex class this semester and the coursework is super fast paced 😭 but it ends next week!!! so!!! spring break might just see weed plug!changmin
holaaaa :)) I just recently discovered ur blog and OMMGGG I love ur writing!!! I read a lot of ur fics before bed yesterday and I didn’t end up sleeping because I kept reading 😭🫣 my fav fic so far is eat me up (sacrifice) and all ur juyeon fics bc I love him a lot 🫶🏼 I love ur new theme btw and I love supporting fellow Latina writers 🎀🩷
HOLA MI AMOR ☹️☹️ thank u so much for ur kind words, i appreciate them more than u know!! <3 and i also love supporting other latinx writers!! gotta stick w gente nuestros yk 😝 latinas 4 juyeon frfr ✊
I just finished the Black Out Or Back Out series and now I feel so empty :(
STOPPPP i just saw this </3 AND I HEAR U!!! i used all my creative juices writing for that series so it’s been hard to hop back on the tbz writing train 😭😭😭
attention all writers! tumblr is rolling out a new feature that allows our work to be used in ai training processes!
be sure to opt out of this in your visibility settings immediately! and remember, you have to opt out for each blog, not just your main!
go to your blogs’ settings (again, you have to do these steps for each blog, not just your main blog)
scroll until you see “visibility” and choose that
in your visibility settings, choose “prevent third-party sharing for (blog name)”
you may opted out already but we don’t take chances with ai around these parts *insert angry cowboy*
tagging some mutuals to get the word out — @multifandomsimagine @pegxcarter @moremaybank @gladerscake @goldenroutledge @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles @drewstarkeyslut @drudyslut @tangledinlove @rafeandonlyrafe @mvybanks
