Lola, 26. I post NSFW stuff - MINORS DON'T INTERACT. Baldur's Gate 3, Critical Role, Witcher, Cyberpunk, just trying to get through life one hyperfixation at the time
I haven't written that many fics, but decided to put the links (including my older Witcher fics that I don't really like anymore, but hey, I had to start somewhere) in one place in case someone needs it
Minors DNI please!
Baldur's Gate 3
Something Real (Ao3)
Astarion x Tav, Tav is afab (she/her), non-smut;
This fic takes place somewhere in the act II. Tav and Astarion had their little hook-up after the tiefling party. It's another version of the unprompted confession he makes/the talk after meeting Araj Oblodra, discussing his feelings past trauma
Word count: 2.5k
CW: mentions of past SA
Light in the shadows (Ao3)
Rolan x fem!Reader smut, reader is afab (she/her), no y/n used
You've been friends with our favorite tiefling bachelor and decide to make your move during the tiefling party that they should have after act II
Word count: 5.5k
The Witcher
"What a prick"
game!Lambert x fem!reader smut, reader is afab (she/her), no y/n used
You spend another winter in Kaer Morhen hoping Eskel will finally reciprocate your interest but then, to your surprise, you find yourself spending a night with a different Wolf
Word count: 2k
Yours, finally
game!Eskel x fem!reader smut, reader is afab (she/her), no y/n used
Alternative version of "What a Prick"; You spend another winter in Kaer Morhen hoping Eskel will finally notice your interest in him. Convinced by a short talk with Lambert you decide to finally act
Word count: 2.5k
Maybe I just convinced myself it's love
game!Lambert x bard!fem!reader smut, reader is afab (she/her), no y/n used
You perform at The Kingfisher Inn when Lambert happens to be in town and, as it always happens when you bump into each other, you spend the night together
Word count: 3.8k
Hi 👋, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔
I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $60,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future.
Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶
If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏
Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤️🩹
https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗
Hi Mohammed, my heart breaks for you and your family. I know it's an overused phrase, but I don't even know what else to say.
To all my followers: I know you came here for fanfics, I know you are probably hearing a lot about the horror of genocide happening in Gaza right now and are probably mentally drained and overwhelmed by it but please, donate if you can and if you can't, share this campaign with your own followers to help Mohammed and his wife, help their young kids Mira, Bakr and Maria. When I was 6, my biggest concern was if I make it home in time for my favorite cartoon. Mira's biggest concern is if she and her family survive another day. Please, share this.
My name is Mohammad Salem Abu Swierh, a husband and father of… Mohammed Abu Swierh needs your support for Help Mohammed's Family From Gaza R
The only downside of playing as a non binary character in Baldur's Gate 3 is that's Rugan calls you a "clever operator" and it just doesn't quite hit the same
I used to not be a big fan of Wyll because I guess I prefer chaotic alignments (and Wyll is the most lawful good that ever existed) in D&D and some of his lines and story seemed clunky to me but then i realized that so many people are shitting on him for completely different reasons than those that just didn't make him my favorite character (to the person who made the white Wyll mod: I will find you and piss in your shoes) and that his story was supposed to be much more elaborate BUT THEY CUT IT OUT. I used to not care that much if someone disliked him, I didn't vibe with some of his scenes as well, but Jesus Fucking Christ, what is wrong with people? To the person who called me out when I criticized him for something small that I didn't think through: thank you, it made me think about his character and how unfairly he is treated as the only POC among the companions and it's just fucking cruel to add to this hate even if it's for different reasons (that are not really valid anyway). There is just too much racism aimed at the only black companion and picking on one line he said that was just written weird and actually my criticism was not really valid (because what he said was actually completely different from what I understood at first glance) and plain dumb
The only downside of playing as a non binary character in Baldur's Gate 3 is that's Rugan calls you a "clever operator" and it just doesn't quite hit the same
LGBT activists and their supporters gather for the first-ever Pride parade in the central city of Plock, Poland, on Aug. 10, 2019. The parade comes as the country finds itself bitterly divided over the growing visibility of the LGBT community and as the government and the powerful Catholic church denounce gay rights as a threat to society. (AP Photo/Czarek Sokolowski)
Note that the Rainbow Madonna - an edit of the Our Lady of Częstochowa painting - is a queer rights symbol, and Poland is traditionally a very Catholic country, so the author got sued.
This photo, it’s worth noting, was also made during a major moral panic - and this country is still not friendly to us.
Our Lady of Częstochowa is intimately linked to Poland, and what this edit points out is that we also have our place here (whether actually Catholic or not).
I just want to add that the author of this graphic was sued for "offending religious feelings" (which is an actual crime in Poland) and could go to jail for up to 2 years for that.
scrupulosity and an OCD obsession with morality is so much more than just wanting to be a good person.
yes, I want to be a good person. but for me, that comes along with:
an unreachably high moral standard
an unshakeable guilt complex
a chronic feeling of “what have I done wrong?”
constant flashbacks to “shame memories”
tying myself up in knots over making the right decision (even over the little things)
and sometimes… this obsession with being a good person actually prevents me from being as good a person as I would be otherwise (e.g it can make me come across as selfish and not compassionate)
I recently reached 100 followers and I am so happy that so many people liked my little blog enough to follow 🥺Thank you so much 🥺 I don't know if anyone would be interested in this but if there's something you want me to write about (either a short fic, some headcanons or something like that) I am open to suggestions! I can write about Baldur's Gate, Dungeon Meshi, Critical Role campaign 3 (although at the moment I'm a few episodes behind because as much as I love it it's so emotionally draining for me because every time I think about those little guys I get a d4 of emotional damage), Black Clover, Shall we date? obey me game, I could maybe dust off my Witcher obsession (books and games). ONLY ABOUT ADULT CHARACTERS.
I have currently a few smut fics in progress, so you can bother me about them so I finally finish them
Zevlor x reader, BG3
Gortash x reader, BG3 (this one I'm not sure about because it quickly drifted away from canon Gortash, Tav!reader really thinks she can fix him and she might be right)
Zora x reader, Black Clover anime
Yami x Charlotte, Black Clover anime
Ashton Greymoore x reader, CR (I love this punk so much, fic is set in ep 55 and I started writing it when this episode came out so yeah, it's been some time...)
Mammon x reader, Obey me
Beel x reader, Obey me
Please someone poke me with a stick to do something about those wips xd
Sometimes a creative outlet is a fun little hobby and sometimes it's a lifelong affliction. Like I crochet because making little woven animals sparks joy and I'm a writer whether I like it or not because I'm tormented by visions
Me writing: haha those two imaginary people are kissing ^^
Me crocheting: I just made 13 legs for a pig that only has 4 legs because something kept going wrong with legs and they looked bad so I had to try again. If I make another mistake and have to go back 4 rows again I WILL START MURDERING PEOPLE
I'm talking about the fact that Ciri had Hjalmar, Yarre, Galahad. Ciri liked being with them and no one forced her. There is no "compulsory heterosexuality" there, Ciri liked these guys sincerely. It is clearly written in the book that Ciri tried to kiss Yarre and she LIKED it. (By claiming that she likes girls, not guys, you just erase her liking for these two guys. And for what?)And no one would condemn Ciri for being attracted to women, Geralt, Yennefer and Triss would only support her (according to the opinion and experience of the sorceress, lesbianism is normal). She could have found and been interested in any girl from the temple, but she chose a guy. And then you claim that she doesn't like guys and she's a lesbian (because Mistle got into Ciri's panties without permission? There are simply no other examples besides Mistle). Ciri feel butterflies in her stomach next to Galahad, or is this also "compulsory heterosexuality"?
Thank you for asking about my lesbian masterdoc notes lovely person who came at me after my post about men sexually assaulting a teen to anonymously tell me that women can rape too and claim that therefore that teen is not attracted to girls!
First: I don't know what do you mean by "lesbianism is normal" in the books where Filippa Eilhart, clearly a lesbian (but apparently not seen as such by many readers I encountered), called perverted by Tissaia (who is mad at her for something else, but brings up her orientation as something to insult her about) (Time of Contemp, p 164). Sabrina treats Filippa's orientation as her just hating men (which is not a very nice portrayal of lesbians, still centering it around men) (Baptism of Fire, p 42). Assire is disgusted by the lipstic smudge on Filippa's chest (The Tower of the Swallow, p 286). Filippa specifically is regularly slutshamed even thouigh all the other sorceresses are seemingly sex positive and very horny all the time. Also there's a mermaid who claims that lesbian sex (as she understands it: sex without penetration) is not real sex, it's something for immature children and she is normal and adult so it's not for her (Sword of Destiny, p 172) - and it's said by a very sex positive character.
Here are Ciri's experiences paired up with quotes from lesbian masterdoc
(Just to clarify: Ciri is a fictional character who was never called in the books or games a "lesbian" or "bisexual", therefore no one can decide or say that she is one of those things (same with her being "heterosexual"). This is how I (and other sapphic women I talked to) INTERPRETED her actions and experiences. I am 100% sure Sapkowski didn't write any of those things on purpose, to be interpreted as such, because he is just an old creepy straight man (really, this books wouldn't be somehow worse if they had less SA in them, Andrzej.). Some of these I see used as an argument to prove that Ciri is "straight" but I personally see them strongly connected to what I read in the lesbian masterdoc. That's why in my previous response I said "I think", unlike this individual sending me asks.)
Ciri is really captivated by naked sorceresses: Yennefer (Blood of Elves, p. 259), Margarita (Time of Contempt, p 85). After she sees Margarita naked she has more positive attitude towards her. There aren't really scenes that would describe Ciri’s appreciation for men’s physique like these ones about women.
You’re far more certain about being attracted to women than you are about being attracted to men
Being really into how women look “aesthetically”/“just as artistic interest”
Ciri is contemplating (using Jarre as an example) what men are seen as attractive, because her friends have crushes on Jarre, but in Cintra a completely different type of men is considered attractive (Blood of Elves, p 248)
Attraction is super complicated. It’s possible to recognize a man IS attractive but not be attracted TO him. Attraction is often coerced by societal conditioning and some lesbians have hypothetical attraction to men due to compulsory heterosexuality.
Only developing attraction to a guy after a female friend expresses attraction to him
Ciri is blushing when she is supposed to be taken care of by Fabio when she is being embarrased about it (Time of Contempt, p 65)
Nervousness and Blushing – A ton of romance media and common cultural tropes have this idea that you know you’re attracted to someone if you’re nervous or blushing around them. Because of this, you might feel like you must be attracted to a man if you feel nervous around him, just because you’re experiencing the physical bodily response you’ve been told to expect, not because you actually want to date him. Actual Attraction: You’re nervous because you’re excited to get to know someone. You find them attractive first and because you’re thinking about your attraction to them, you get self conscious because you hope they might like you too. Compulsory Heterosexuality: You’re nervous because you are aware that he is attracted to you, and because he’s paying such close attention to you– especially if he’s pushing boundaries or getting too close into your personal space– you become self conscious because you know he’s watching you. You blush because you’re uncomfortable
Ciri is being flirty with men to cause jealousy in their female companions, flirt is a tool, she enjoys the attention and men offering to defend her and protect her (Time of Contempt, p 79)
You mistake the desire for male approval as attraction. You don’t necessarily want a relationship with men, but you want men to want a relationship with you
Reading a desire to be attractive to men as attraction to them
Big imbalance of power with Eredin - he is suggesting something like BDSM, treating her almost like she’s an animal, comparing her to a mare (The Lady of the Lake, p 184)
The only men you’re attracted to are those who hurt you, harass you, or abuse you
Only being comfortable with sex with men if there’s an extreme power imbalance and your desires aren’t centred
Eredin tells Ciri in her dream that SHE desires him (The Lady of the Lake, p 277)
Your fantasies about men give you intense distress or anxiety. They could be intrusive thoughts, forms of self-harm, or otherwise
Ciri after some time of talking at some point decides that Galahad is “not ugly” (I read it in polish, don’t know what was the official translation) (The Lady of the Lake, p 519)
Choosing to be attracted to a guy at all, not just choosing to act on it but flipping your attraction on like a switch – that’s a common lesbian thing.
Trivia from Genealogie (Sapkowski’s notes about characters): at the age of 10 Ciri was “in love” (a celebrity crush basically) with Olaf Stigvason, a famous warrior from Skellige. Olaf was 35, had a wife and children older than Ciri
Male celebrities/fictional characters are completely unobtainable crushes and thus it allows the lesbian in question to distance themselves from men
Only/mostly being attracted to unattainable, disinterested, or fictional guys or guys you never or rarely interact with. (Such as teachers, married or older men, and men that live far away)
The only exception seems to be Hjalmar. But at that time Ciri was a child, and their relationship is clearly shown as very competitive (which led to him breaking his leg to impress her)
You go through past memories trying to prove your attraction to men (”But I had a boyfriend when I was 13!”)
Reading your anxiety/discomfort/nervousness/combativeness around men as attraction to them. Confusing your anxiety around men for “butterflies” or being flustered
But the one who really managed to go further and rape Ciri was only a girl, Mistle. Ciri told Mistle not to touch her, but she didn't care and continued to impose, and then died in shit. It is unlikely that after such a Ciri will be able to perceive girls as a romantic interest. Ciri had at least positive examples and experience with the guys.
TW: rape
Mistle rapes her and it made me so angry that people used to tell me, before I read the books, as a "proof" that Sapkowski is progressive: "Ciri has a girlfriend in that series!". Yeah, she does. A rapist girlfriend who "saved" her from SA from a guy just to assault her two seconds later.
But Mistle wasn't the only one that "managed to go further". The elf king Auberon also rapes her (she is forced to be there and he is performing sexual acts on her - it is rape). It is even said that to feel more comfortable during that she imagines Auberon is Mistle (which given the fucked up nature of Ciri's relationship with Mistle just makes this situation even more fucked up). And some other examples: Hotsporn manipulates her into letting him touch her chest by guilt tripping, that he's injured and she should let him do it (even though she pushes him away twice, he's still pressuring her and she finally gives up). And (and I will die on that hill) even Cahir rapes Ciri. He is getting her naked and touching her everywhere without her consent - because she is VERY young then, she is not even a teen. Rape doesn't require penetration (as we can see with Mistle), Ciri is definitely processing what Cahir did to her as rape, based on nightmares she has about him.
I never claimed Ciri doesn't have bad experiences with girls. But to be honest, even in your ask it's actually one girl. And A LOT of guys. But Mistle is roughly her age and my post was about pedophiles. About older and adult men sexually assaulting this child and sexualizing her the moment they see her and then in the midst of all of this that older woman being the first adult in the long time to see her as who she is: a kid.
About Ciri not being able to perceive girls as romantic interest (and as you suggest being able to perceive guys as a romantic interest): when I was writing my thesis about queerness in witcher I did a whole analysis of the lesbian masterdoc with the points about lesbians' "attraction" to men due to compulsory heterosexuality, things that make them think they can't be lesbians. For every or almost every point in the masterdoc I had examples from Ciri's life and experiences described in the books. I couldn't put it in my thesis in the end (I was analysing queer motifs, not trying to decide what's Ciri's orientation and I was writing specifically about games, the books were supposed to just give me a background). Maybe I'll dig it out, translate it to English and post it here if someone is interested in reading it.
I don't think Ciri is attracted to men (but not because of the assault) and I think she is attracted to women (also not because of lack of/despite assault). But in the post I was showing how adult men sexualize and abuse a child. And showing how different was an interaction with that older woman. I didn't even mention her attraction in my post.
