This Is My Juice

And I'm Rollin in it

[slatesource]

Jenny Slate says that misogyny makes her “The Opposite of Horny”

[kaptainzorro]

THIS IS HOW I USE THE WORD HORNY! 

FINALLY SOMEONE GETS IT.

[kaptainzorro]

gonna try to upload some photos more often. Here’s one from a few months back on a shooting excursion I did in L.A. Hoping to get into it more and get better at editing in general!

[kaptainzorro]

gonna try to upload some photos more often. Here’s one from a few months back on a shooting excursion I did in L.A. Hoping to get into it more and get better at editing in general!

[kaptainzorro]

It’s been a weird week. And a strange day. This is the jam.

Happy Day fellow laborers. 

[allurqueerlittleheartcanhandle]

[risaskolir]

[willow]

friends: do we have to explicitly and cordially invite you to everything me; yeah

[kaptainzorro]

I am king of the open invite. But I will never go somewhere unless invited or the host says it's ok.

[kaptainzorro]

"Why isn't sperm called Boner Boogers?"

@toasterssupertasty is a god damn genius

[kaptainzorro]

I like commercials.

[charmed]

The Mummy Returns (2001) dir. Stephen Sommers

[kaptainzorro]

Brenden Frazier. Come to us in our time of need.

[kaptainzorro]

This is how we fix racism

Collinate Mars.

Cuz seriously y'all.

Fuck Martians.

[pigmenting]

So this poem is a telegram to let you know that / I still think about you, that I’m still proud of you, / that when I remember you, I always remember you / as beautiful.

Cristin O’Keefe Aptowicz, from “Heavenly Creature” in Oh, Terrible Youth (via pigmenting)

[itschinyere-deactivated20200201]

Nigga are you okay?

[kblck]

LMFAOOOO

[drdgawdnamdv]

Whhhyyyy

[moodyspacebabe-deactivated20180]

💀💀💀

[shencomix]

[kaptainzorro]

I feel so targeted

[they-call-me-marlon]

I’ve been thinking a lot about that post

The one about SpongeBob’s 3,000 dollar outfit and his 3 story house

And it seems weird considering he’s a fry cook at a fast food restaurant owned by a guy known for his penny pinching. And Squidward has a pretty nice place too.

And unlike SpongeBob he hates his job so he has to mostly be doing it for the money. So the question is how does Mr Krabs end up paying them so much.

My theory is part of the answer is that SpongeBob isn’t just a fry cook at a fast food restaurant, he’s the best fry cook at the best fast food restaurant that’s selling a product shown to be addictive do the revenue is pretty high.

Then I thought about the fact that there are only two employees of the Krusty Krab which is unusual. It turns out the average McDonald’s has between 40 and 60 employees. So Mr Krabs, instead of paying 60 people 10k a year, he can pay two people 150 or even 200k a year and a. Save a bunch of money b. Give them inventive to work all the time c. Better keep the Krabby Patty secret formula safe because two people are easier to monitor and because they’re less likely to give it away if they’re well compensated. And d. I’m not sure how the bikini bottom economy works but I’m assuming he gets fewer taxes as a small business owner with so few employees.

I dunno

[thinksquad-deactivated20190405]

[kaptainzorro]

Man this is In-Sayian

[they-call-me-marlon]

@urbanzoologie Kimberly, you don’t understand! Barney was just the fall guy! Ted was the real piece of shit the whole time and he pinned most of it on Barney because 1. He didn’t want good kids to think less of him and 2. He’s mad that Barney got laid more.

Plus he’s probably a pathological liar and nobody else was there during his story telling to confirm or deny anything he said! It’s the perfect crime.

[they-call-me-marlon]

But really who knows how much of what Ted said is really true?

[kaptainzorro]

Barney is the one who really grows and develops. I think we get a MUCH wider breadth of emotion from him. The story is really just a mopey narrator talking about how his awesome friend with a past rife with betrayal, distrust, abandonment, and rejection learned how to take hold of his own life , be the master of his own character, embrace all the things he loved despite ridicule, and open himself up to love and relationships time and again.

Also Barneys voice cracking when he confections his dad and says, "if yu were gonna be a lame dad why couldn't yu have been mine?!" Made me actually tear up. Robin not breaking up with Kal Penn was the biggest heartbreak to watch, and he was consistently had the funnies lines. It's just too bad the writers said "yeah fuck all that" and threw him out a bit but we don't talk about the last season.

[netflixandnudez]

Most annoying part of your 20's: Feeling like you're not where you should be, while everyone else SEEMS like they are.

[kaptainzorro]

The best realization I've made in my late 20's is that literally about 85% of people are making shit up as they go along while screaming internally. There are also that 15% who really do have shot figured out but that's the exception not the rule.