Because some people don't deserve joy

adult Katie Killjoy fictive

[katiekillsjoy]

Good afternoon! I'm Katie Killjoy, and this is my fucking blog! I have no DNI and block freely!

BYI you should know I'm a raging bitch and if you are a rude ass hoe to me then I will be a bitch TO YOU. I'm sweet as pie if you're sweet though and you will have thoroughly invited any bitchery from me before I deliver it. But you are not fucking immune from it. I've been around the block way too many times with bitches who think they're cool but then they're just dirt ass shitbags not worth the gum on my shoe. I AM FED UP WITH IT. I AM THROUGH BEING KIND WHEN KINDNESS IS NOT EXTENDED TO ME

Now I know a lot of people can say shit like that and it turns out their idea of kindness is "bending over backwards for whatever they want you to do" and they are IN FACT the shitbags I am talking about. How do you know I am not one of them? How do you know I'm not lying? How do you know I have the self awareness to not perpetuate the abuse that has been done to me? YOU DON'T! YOU DON'T KNOW THIS ABOUT ANYONE! NO ONE IS SAFE I'M JUST THE ONLY ONE GIVING YOU A FUCKING WARNING! YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN GUARANTEE YOUR OWN SAFETY!!!

[raggedycarolina]

A while ago my system decided to avoid discourse and upsetting things and unfollow people who post it even if we agree with their takes but its really hard to find people who fit the bill and sometimes when youre upset you want to say shit about it because ppl keep saying dumb shit but it really just becomes upsetting and turns your blog into the kind or blog you would unfollow and you get more upset more often. Point is, im gonna start trying to unfollow people for discourse and upsetting things rather than engaging and avoid going places other than my dash and especially avoiding people who post stupid shit.

[katiekillsjoy]

come to me for your discourse needs i will still do discourse and ONLY I will do discourse

[evilwizard]

sin is actually really cool and good for you

[evilwizard]

#mysins

[weareunity]

I love my bitch wife

[katiekillsjoy]

Christ it's so annoying when people flaunt their credentials for their stupid ass opinions. "I have DID! This means you have to listen to my dumbass system opinion and think I'm automatically correct!" Yeah well I have DID and I think you should shut the fuck up.

[katiekillsjoy]

And what's even more irritating is that a lot of spineless abuse-me puritans who've been taught to always believe any guilt trippy bullshit anyone in a group says sans critical thought and self flagellate in response will go "oh my god youre so right i believe you implicitly because you know more than me and I am just incapable of using my brain to form my own opinion do you love me now do you love me do you love me". And they'll do it specifically to the worst most rancid guilt trippy exclusionary opinion because they want to make themselves the most respectful and sanitized and palatable and justified in the room so that no one can ever criticize them because mama didnt raise them to have critical thought, she raised them to fawn to her when she's upset and they havent unpacked any of that so it follows them everywhere. They're also utterly miserable and don't know why so at least there's that.

[weareunity]

And the fact that this makes it so people en mass believe whoever is the Loudest rather than like. Who is right. Because whoever is the meanest and loudest will give people the strongest fawn response, so invariably it makes people listen to assholes more.

[katiekillsjoy]

YEAH and I'm tired of being like bwuh bwuh bwuh people are hurting wahh so saddd awww they only do it because of abuse because I WAS ABUSED TOO!!! AND I CHOSE NOT TO BE A DIPSHIT!!!!! DIPSHITTERY IS A CHOICE YOU'RE MAKING!!!! EXAMINE YOUR FUCKING CHOICES RATHER THAN JUST DOING YOUR BASE URGES!!!!

[katiekillsjoy]

"actually DID is not fun it is bad and horrible to have because you have a bunch of assholes in your brain and it is miserable" skill issue. stop being assholes to each other. idiot. lol. Imagine thinking misery from your system dynamics is inherent to how you work and not a choice you're all making.

[katiekillsjoy]

I think the problem was iron deficiency

[katiekillsjoy]

anyway i got activated in like two seconds flat and idk how the hell that happened because i wasnt really triggered by anything real i just got pissed about some dumbfuck saying stupid shit and following it up with "-Sincerely, a DID system" as if that fucking matters. i think im more passive influencing trinity than actually fronting

[katiekillsjoy]

I really wish parents would stop abusing their kids because when it happens en masse like this they all get together and make the most rancid social groups because they think abuse is normal and stop questioning fucking anything and then they come talk to ME and can you FUCKING IMAGINE how that feels???

[katiekillsjoy]

Some people enjoy having someone around them who will just do what they say and try to repeat everything back verbatim and swallow everything out of fear but I ACTUALLY FUCKING HATE IT!!! I DO NOT WANT A LITTLE DOLL TO PUT INTO POSES AND NEVER UPSET ME I WANT A FRIEND WITH FEELINGS AND A BRAIN AND A SPINAL COLUMN THANK YOU!!!!

[katiekillsjoy]

I really wish parents would stop abusing their kids because when it happens en masse like this they all get together and make the most rancid social groups because they think abuse is normal and stop questioning fucking anything and then they come talk to ME and can you FUCKING IMAGINE how that feels???

[katiekillsjoy]

Christ it's so annoying when people flaunt their credentials for their stupid ass opinions. "I have DID! This means you have to listen to my dumbass system opinion and think I'm automatically correct!" Yeah well I have DID and I think you should shut the fuck up.

[katiekillsjoy]

And what's even more irritating is that a lot of spineless abuse-me puritans who've been taught to always believe any guilt trippy bullshit anyone in a group says sans critical thought and self flagellate in response will go "oh my god youre so right i believe you implicitly because you know more than me and I am just incapable of using my brain to form my own opinion do you love me now do you love me do you love me". And they'll do it specifically to the worst most rancid guilt trippy exclusionary opinion because they want to make themselves the most respectful and sanitized and palatable and justified in the room so that no one can ever criticize them because mama didnt raise them to have critical thought, she raised them to fawn to her when she's upset and they havent unpacked any of that so it follows them everywhere. They're also utterly miserable and don't know why so at least there's that.

[katiekillsjoy]

Christ it's so annoying when people flaunt their credentials for their stupid ass opinions. "I have DID! This means you have to listen to my dumbass system opinion and think I'm automatically correct!" Yeah well I have DID and I think you should shut the fuck up.

[katiekillsjoy]

thinking about horrid tumblr post which i hate. it goes something like "i worried that my friends didnt like hanging out with me and just put up with me and i expressed this to a friend and he was like 'wow i am hurt that you would think so low of me' and tumblr user was like wow he is so right it is so terrible of me to imagine my beautiful lovely friends being upset with me. and this is my advice to you too, tumblr, you shouldn't think ill of your friends because that is unkind to them." and this is a very stupid post. i really hate when people act like a mental illness that is hurting only the person who has it is somehow victimizing the people around them. "you should stop your mental illness activities because it makes other people feel bad" you should kys

it is just a new way of sanitizing yourself and your own thoughts to become more palatable to those around you rather than actually dealing with why you might feel that way. that bitch didnt stop feeling that way she just dissociated it. she didnt unpack why she feels like no one likes her. she just said it hurts other people when i think this so i must not think this. wow!!! even more mental illness!!! you even feel like you cant have your own thoughts in the privacy of your own head!!!!

it got "fixed" because you tried to say your feelings to your friend and were rejected and now you push away those feelings. actually you are sicker.

to heal from mental illness you will be messy and mean and it will not be all flowers and sunshine and pleasantness

[sysboxes]

[Text: This alter is tired of catering to others.]

[Text: This alter is sick of drama.]

[Text: This alter says: fuck you fuck you fuck y-]

[Text: This alter is not responsible for managing your triggers.]

Like/Reblog if you save or use!

[treecitysessions]

[katiekillsjoy]

btw if you suffer from nausea and are doing a lot of weed, try a heat pad over your stomach or a hot bath. if it does help, then you have chs. But it will help a lot and save you a lot of nausea and throwing up. please do it. it's not worth suffering through. i'm sorry there's no cure except quitting weed. i wish it was different, too. i wish there was another drug that worked, too. but this one doesn't work anymore.

[depsidase]