Writing Tip: Basics of Grief
Grief is inconsistent. It's not logical. It doesn't follow rules and the one thing about grief is that everyone processes it differently.
You can grieve the living, and you can grieve the dead. You might grieve an unrequited love that was never meant to be, or you might be grieving the death of a loved one.
People react in ways that might not make sense to others. Your character might cry over a misplaced object. They might feel 'fine' one moment, and then completely overwhelmed in the next moment. Small, unexpected things can trigger this. Your character is in public and briefly hears lyrics of their loved one's favourite song? This could easily trigger a meltdown.
Mundane things can become emotional. This means cooking meals or seeing a certain snack in the shop. Reaching for their phone and opening a specific conversation as if to text that one person by pure habit.
It shows up in behaviour. These are the physical affects that someone would see. Perhaps something a close friend or family member would only notice. Maybe the character looks more tired than normal, or has far more nightmares. Forgetfulness, withdrawal, or conversely, getting more attached to others. Does your character throw themselves into work to stay busy, or pick up random hobbies they thought they'd enjoy, but actually hate? Might they take up risky habits just to feel some other emotion again?
People around them act differently. Friends avoiding topics, people either trying to get closer to help, or even withdrawing from the relationship altogether.
There isn't a timeline. The event might not be something that your character gets over. It sticks with them. It builds or breaks their character. Setbacks and obstacles: This event might change the shape of their future completely. Do they get over it quickly? Do they seek help to process it? Do they power through and take this grief with them their entire life, or do they fall to the intensity?
Think about a time in any media you've consumed (webcomics, TV series, anime, films, books, etc...) where someone has lost something. This could be a lost love, a lost life, or even lost someone they thought they hated.
Grief doesn't have to apply to death.