Étoile @kayeetio - Tumblr Blog

dropping food when you're already sad is such an intense emotion. Just the most fucking wretched self indulgent pity. One time I spilled a bowl of ice cream when i had already spent most of the day sobbing and honestly im still chasing that high

aromantic-academic

The need for academic validation is strong today.

#not me spending 4hrs in the library #without moving #im just sipping water every hour #the need is strong today

Stayed at the school library today, i spent 2ish hours tryna complete 100 Q&A before heading home. I only got to Q50.

Idk why i spent so little time there but felt like i was sitting in the coldest spot for more than 2hrs

i bought my office Ma cappuccino but she wasn't where she's supposed to be so i left the coffee she let get cold on her desk. i messaged her and she said she was going to come back and see me but she took too long, i had to say bye.

on my way home i bumped into my old team leader. she was on her way to Templo for a meeting or practice.

#studyblr #study blog #studyspo #academia #PT #kayeetio

elodieunderglass

changes and trends in horror-genre films are linked to the anxieties of the culture in its time and place. Vampires are the manifestation of grappling with sexuality; aliens, of foreign influence. Horror from the Cold War is about apathy and annihilation; classic Japanese horror is characterised by “nature’s revenge”; psychological horror plays with anxieties that absorbed its audience, like pregnancy/abortion, mental illness, femininity. Some horror presses on the bruise of being trapped in a situation with upsetting tasks to complete, especially ones that compromise you as a person - reflecting the horrors and anxieties of capitalism etc etc etc. Cosmic horror is slightly out of fashion because our culture is more comfortable with, even wistful for, “the unknown.” Monster horror now has to be aware of itself, as a contingent of people now live in the freedom and comfort of saying “I would willingly, gladly, even preferentially fuck that monster.” But I don’t know much about films or genres: that ground has been covered by cleverer people.

I don’t actually like horror or movies. What interests me at the moment is how horror of the 2020s has an element of perception and paying attention.

Multiple movies in one year discussed monsters that killed you if you perceived them. There are monsters you can’t look at; monsters that kill you instantly if you get their attention. Monsters where you have to be silent, look down, hold still: pray that they pass over you. M Zombies have changed from a hand-waved virus that covers extras in splashy gore, to insidious spores. A disaster film is called Don’t Look Up, a horror film is called Nope. Even trashy nun horror sets up strange premises of keeping your eyes fixed on something as the devil GETS you.

No idea if this is anything. (I haven’t seen any of these things because, unfortunately, I hate them.) Someone who understands better than me could say something clever here, and I hope they do.

But the thing I’m thinking about is what this will look like to the future, as the Victorian sex vampires and Cold War anxieties look to us. I think they’ll have a little sympathy, but they probably won’t. You poor little prey animals, the kids will say, you were awfully afraid of facing up to things, weren’t you?

canadianwheatpirates

I'm like one hour from going to bed so my take is not going to be extensive but my guess is that the social anxiety this is reflecting is the surveillance state. And the fact that private companies (i.e. not just the state) are also doing a ton of surveillance. And even the fact that the way we often use social media -- less so Tumblr, which has some anonymity still -- is basically internalising that surveillance and performing for it at all times.

It seems like there are two modes going on here: "avoid being perceived by the horror" (Bird Box, A Quiet Place etc) and "perform correctly so that the horror can't get you" (your trashy nun example). Both of them arise from surveillance logics; one is "avoid being surveilled or it will Get you", the other is "you are being surveilled, perform correctly or it will Get you".

And with regard to the social elements it's all reflecting, I mean -- have you seen the state of things? It's extremely difficult to avoid being surveilled! A monster where you have to not look at it is fucking easy mode by comparison!

(Pretend I cited Michel Foucault and Erving Goffman; they're relevant but also it's bedtime.)

elodieunderglass

Ooh yes, and breaking it down like this made me think:

- fear of observation (surveillance state)

- fear of not performing correctly (purity culture and evangelical backlashes)

- fear of confronting existential threat (climate change)

fozmeadows

my contribution to this extremely salient and clever discussion is to say: I think we should call this subgenre panopticonsequence horror

thebellekeys

The Ultimate Dark Academia Book Recommendation Guide Ever

The title of this post is clickbait. I, unfortunately, have not read every book ever. Not all of these books are particularly “dark” either. However, these are my recommendations for your dark academia fix. The quality of each of these books varies. I have limited this list to books that are directly linked to the world of academia and/or which have a vaguely academic setting.

Dark Academia staples:

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio

Dead Poets Society by Nancy H. Kleinbaum

Vita Nostra by Maryna Dyachenko

Dark academia litfic or contemporary:

Bunny by Mona Awad

The Idiot by Elif Batuman

These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever

White Ivy by Susie Yang

The Cloisters by Katy Hays

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

The Lake of Dead Languages by Carol Goodman

A Separate Peace by John Knowles

Black Chalk by Christopher J. Yates

Attribution by Linda Moore

Dark academia thrillers or horror:

In My Dreams I Hold a Knife by Ashley Winstead

The Maidens by Alex Michaelides

Ghosts of Harvard by Francesca Serritella

Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth

They Never Learn by Layne Fargo

The It Girl by Ruth Ware

Never Saw Me Coming by Vera Kurian

Dark academia fantasy/sci-fi:

Babel: An Arcane History by R.F. Kuang

The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

A Lesson in Vengeance by Victoria Lee

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern

Vicious by V.E. Schwab

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

The Betrayals by Bridget Collins

Dark academia romance:

Gothikana by RuNyx

Alone With You in the Ether by Olivie Blake

Dark academia YA or MG:

Truly Devious by Maureen Johnson

A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik

Ace of Spades by Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé

The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater

Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Crave by Tracy Wolff

Wilder Girls by Rory Power

The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling

Dark academia miscellaneous:

My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell

Disorientation by Elaine Hsieh Chou

Alphabet of Thorn by Patricia A. McKillip

peacozy

I do not respect the grind. Go to bed

ancientsstudies

Rainy Season in the Tropics by Frederic Edwin Church.

toomanyrats

on shame and yearning (pt.2)

neophaim

Sources:

S.T., "300122," Tumblr, January 30, 2022, https://www.tumblr.com/ryebreadgf/674840497145233408/300122-st.

Silas Denver Melvin, "love as an act of merciful conquer," Tumblr, November 2, 2021, https://www.tumblr.com/sweatermuppet/669052643259432960/from-love-as-an-act-of-merciful-conquer-by-silas.

chandajaan, Tumblr, accessed via https://rockboci.tumblr.com/post/674728141263093760.

Richard Siken, "Birds Hover the Trampled Field," in War of the Foxes (April 28, 2015).

Emily Palermo, "What I Could Never Confess Without Some Bravado," The Rising Phoenix Review, March 15, 2016, https://therisingphoenixreview.com/2016/03/15/what-i-could-never-confess-without-some-bravado-by-emily-palermo/.

Georges Bataille, My Mother/Madame Edwarda/The Dead Man (January 1, 1966).

Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath (April 1, 2000).

Frank O'Hara, "Homosexuality," Poetry Foundation, May 1970, https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/browse?contentId=31570.

Heather Havrilesky, "I'm Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I've Wasted My Whole Life," The Cut, November 28, 2018, https://www.thecut.com/2018/11/im-broke-and-friendless-and-ive-wasted-my-whole-life.html.

Lucille Clifton, "climbing," in The Book of Light (July 1, 1992).

fairieicedtea

my favourite study method is asking everyone to pray for me

x3nshit

one thing i need to start living by is “become the thing that you want” if i want friends who throw themed parties maybe i should start throwing those parties. if i want someone who writes me love letters maybe i should start writing letters for the people i love. if i want to hang out at museums and pretty cafes maybe i should invite my friends to these places. and maybe even then i won’t find the kind of people i want to be around. but then i would have become the exact person i want to be around. and maybe that’s good enough.