HIATUS - 04/08-??

Independent, Selective, & Fandomless Original Species OC Written by Al

[nele15-deactivated20180318]

Help me Father for I am weak and also an idiot.

[thefloatingstone]

tumblr notifs: Mutual™ has liked your post

me: *clicks on the button to see which post* I must know which of my humble offerings have pleased my dearest.

[kellpyre-blog]

@hxpeincarnate || continued

        While Darren had heard her annoyed rebuttal, it couldn’t put a dent in the excitement to share his comedic genius with her. His body shook with the effort required to contain his mirth, the kellpyre reduced to a trembling ball of old leather and stray giggles, his ear-to-ear grin placing fangs on display. He could only contain a joke for so long, however, and it soon spilled from his lips whether Kaida wanted to hear it or not.

        “— A spatula!” Tickled laughter echoed off the warehouse walls, the man tipping and nearly falling off the beam he was perched upon. Good thing he had supernatural reflexes to go with his incredible wit. Darren wasn’t sure how long the moment lasted. Two, three minutes...another decade, perhaps. Ah well, he had plenty of time.

        Eventually his hysterics began to settle, ending with a final, satisfied sigh and a muttered “that was good”. Eyes lifted to look back at the girl far across from him, his smile soon melting into confused concern.

             “What’re y’doing out so late, anyways? There’s monsters out here, y’know.”

[nintendwoes]

[bittersweet-tremolo]

[ghostclvb]

the delivery of this joke makes it 50 times better like you have to actually hear it it will kill you

[kellpyre-blog]

       “…Y'think there’s a universe where we have tallscreen TVs instead of widescreen? And it’s normal? Everyone’s watchin’ Batman in portrait mode like ‘yeah, this totally would look worse sideways.’”

[kellpyre-blog]

hey uuuuh drop a like if you don’t mind a discount vampire with 30 IQ asking existential questions in your inbox

[cheese24k]

Wait a second, am I tripping balls?

[xsunnyeclipse]

[metalkilltheking]

Visit Original Link

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

to be honest I actually adjust a little TOO quickly to things so once I’ve been somewhere for more than a week I basically feel like I’ve always been there like

I went to live on a farm and I’d been there long enough to take three breaths and I already couldn’t imagine not getting up to milk the goats. I was peeing in an outhouse like blissfully unaware that indoor plumbing existed and that I’d used it before. met some old Norwegian lady like “yes I’ve lived in this house for 105 years. I was born on this mountain” and I was like damn….same……… … .

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

you could drop me off in the swiss alps and tell me “this is your life now” and after 2 and a half weeks I wouldn’t remember how to speak English I’d be like “I wonder what lies beyond the hills…..” and then u could pick me up at 2 AM and drop me off in Tokyo and tell me now my job is teaching English to businessmen and in 48 hours I’d be like “yeah that adds up”

[kellpyre-blog]

REPOST, DO NOT REBLOG! LIST 5 – 10 (OR MORE) THINGS YOUR MUSE HAS ON THEM AT ALL TIMES — WHETHER IT’S IN THEIR POCKETS, THEIR WALLET, THEIR BAG, ETC… TAG 5 – 10 OTHER PEOPLE!

TAGGED BY:  stole it from @ironbloodcd TAGGING:  uhhhh everyone...because I LOVE you

ROSARY BEADS: a very old gift from his friend, Magnus Stidolph, a Catholic priest and former hunter. It’s a blessed rosary he wears around his neck at all times, to keep Yaré from tracking him down as easily.

CHOTKI: a woven bracelet worn around his right wrist. It’s handmade and always worn. This is actually the 6th one he’s made, the other five lost or destroyed over the centuries.

GUITAR: a worn, 6-string acoustic he purchased from an elderly and well-traveled Canadian. The guitar’s body and the hard case itself are covered in stickers from around the world, many places Darren had already visited himself. The ones he hasn’t he plans to, and has added some stickers of his own along the way.

SKETCHBOOK: kept within his jacket pocket, this book looks well loved. It’s ancient, rough around the edges and mildly burned, with a rope tie to keep it closed and its contents safe. Inside, the book’s every page is covered with drawings, detailed recreations of some of Darren’s favorite places, moments, and people he’s met. It was filled completely decades ago.

PHOTOS: scattered within his guitar case are numerous pictures, from the earliest days of cameras to modern times, with their dates scrawled on the back for when he does actually organize them together. One day, they will make up the sequel to his sketchbook; however, there is a clear gap between the dates of his last sketch and his first photo, where his second book was lost.

[kellpyre-blog]

Darren is not all that great when it comes to entering through windows, even though he rarely uses doors to begin with. There’s not any sort of thrill associated with entering living spaces that way, it’s just become a habit. Doesn’t mean he’s gotten good at it. At all. Despite being small (as a bat or a human) he still trips on his way in and ends up sprawled across the floor, more often than not. If he gets in.

He hasn’t figured out that strange invention called glass, either. Since most people keep their windows closed, he runs into them alot. And screens, too. Even open windows are a hazard with the screens covering the outside, and Darren has bounced off many of those like they’re sideways trampolines. He just has terrible luck with windows, and yet.

But hiding in some poor soul’s attic or kitchen cabinet is a lot cheaper than renting a house or grabbing a hotel, especially when he’s running low on cash, so he’s been guilty of breaking and entering since 1700. Darren has had many things thrown at him in his time, dodged his far share of bullets and screaming ladies with frying pans. Maybe he’ll learn his lesson by the time it’s the year 3000 and windows don’t exist anymore.

[wiinterempress-deactivated20180]

250+ starters you can use

even more starters·random starters from various sources (once again, from spotify playlists, random commentary, tv shows, books, movies, and my brain).

❝A little warning would have been nice!❞

❝You almost shot me! Again!❞

❝Hide your wives, hide your daughters, hell, hide your sheep!❞

❝I saw how you danced for them. There is no more need for that innocent act.❞

❝You’ll have to rip my bento box from my cold, dead hands.❞

❝Book? What book?❞

❝It’s all lies! Slander I say!❞

❝So after we were finished, he reached for his phone and began to play Candy Crush.❞

❝You owe me. I mean really owe me.❞

❝Stop it, you’re being even more rude than usual.❞

❝The cold and I don’t mix.❞

❝You look like you were fucked thoroughly last night. Was it worth it?❞

❝I had sex behind the court house.❞

❝Public sex is the best kind of sex next to make up, angry sex.❞

❝They hold you to a different standard because you are not some peasant roaming the streets. You are royalty.❞

❝If you are going to dance, at least pretend you can dance well.❞

❝You have far too much darkness within your heart. You will not be able to enter this place.❞

❝If, for example, you are alive at the bottom of the sea, I shall cut off my two legs and become a fish.❞

❝I want to fall asleep while embraced.❞

❝I once believed long ago that I could wish upon a star and my dreams will come true. Now I know such things are false.❞

❝I will savor the day I can watch you fall.❞

❝I will hunt you down & I will not show mercy.❞

❝There is little we can do. The rot has begun to set in.❞

❝You can keep your little princess in her proper little place. But if she follows all your orders, does exactly what she’s told? She will never ever grow up, she will only grow old.❞

❝Good deed? You so called good deed sentenced him to death.❞

❝That child will do whatever it takes to survive ; I suggest you do the same.❞

❝I am the Queen/King & I demand respect.❞

❝You will find me at the corner of 5th avenue & 57th street.❞

❝Girls don’t want smelly boys. They want chocolate, pretty shoes, and a good fuck every week.❞

❝I want you to break me with your own hands.❞

❝Have you stepped into your own trap, my lord? Any evidence you have against me, you yourself bought and paid for. Do you now begin to believe it?❞

❝Why must you leave a king to follow you? Why not a QUEEN?❞

❝It is true. I was unfaithful to you with all of them. With half your court. With soldiers of your guard, with grooms, with stablehands. Look for the rest of your life at every man that ever knew me and wonder if I didn’t find him a better man than you!❞

❝ I have a little neck.❞

❝You make love as you eat, with a great deal of noise and no subtlety!❞

❝Will you not kiss your daughter?❞

❝She has the face of a simpering sheep. And the manners. But not the morals. I don’t want her near me.❞

❝How DARE you and the rest of your barbarians set fire to my library?❞

❝You have such bony knees.❞

❝Queens. Queens. Strip them naked as any other woman, they are no longer queens.❞

❝I will not be told where I can go and where I cannot go!❞

❝The King has asked for me?❞

❝Even in carnal matters?❞

❝I shall not go the way of my sister!❞

❝Power is as exciting as love, I discover.❞

❝And who has more power than our dearest king/queen?❞

❝Touch her, and I’ll have her sent from court.❞

❝Mind your tongue, or I’ll have you sent from court.❞

❝I ORDER you.❞

❝…I think I’m a good person. I think there’s good in everyone.❞

❝I see these kids I’ve known all my life and wonder: What happened?❞

❝Remember those days when we were singing and clapping, happy and napping, baking cookies, eating paste?❞

❝College will be paradise.❞

❝Grow up. Bulimia’s so ‘87.❞

❝…Before you answer: I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes.❞

❝For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure.❞

❝You LIAR.❞

❝They will say my child is the bastard, regardless of what you do.❞

❝I care not who has the title “bastard” when I am dead.❞

❝You are the QUEEN. A girl this time, a boy the next.❞

❝Chaos is great! chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling!❞

❝Don’t read it. She’s having extra-heavy flow and wanted some advice from my gyno.❞

❝What’s your damage?❞

❝Sorry but I really had to wake you. See I decided that I must ride you ‘til I break you.❞

❝I think we broke my mattress.❞

❝No sleep tonight for you, better chug that Mountain Dew.❞

❝I’m like oxygen. I’m everywhere.❞

❝Thus ending her hangover. I say we go with Big Blue.❞

❝Shoulda thought of that before you killed me. I’m gonna be coughing up drain cleaner for eternity.”❞

❝Why are you not dead? Why do you live? How do you live? Why do you not lie at the deepest hole of the sea, bloodless, and bloated, and at peace with honorable death?❞

❝There are never enough hours in the days of a queen, and her nights have too many.❞

❝I was hoping you’d rip my clothes off me, sport.❞

❝I bet there’s all kinds of interesting things in that locker. Maybe some “ich luge” bullets…?”❞

❝I hope she’ll be a fool – that’s the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool.❞

❝And I like large parties. They’re so intimate. At small parties there isn’t any privacy.❞

❝You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.❞

❝Surprise, surprise.❞

❝I’m older, but hardly more wise.❞

❝Is she beautiful?❞

❝I have borne you a daughter, Your Majesty.❞

❝Your Queen, I cannot be. Your mistress, I will not be.❞

❝For men love what they cannot have, and hate what they cannot control.❞

❝If I must die, then I will die boldly, as I have lived.❞

❝But stars come out at night.❞

❝I am a fool to own it, but I am in a fever for his/her touch.❞

❝Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.❞

❝Is that how it is? You fuck me and go behind my back and pledge your love to another?❞

❝Cut the shrill voice alright? I can hardly hear myself think.❞

❝If you wake me up, I will throw sharp objects at you.❞

❝Okay, I get your angry, but you should know better than to antagonize them.❞

❝They’re as far away as I could send them.❞

❝Are we ruled by superstition?❞

❝I do not fear the people.❞

❝BUT WHY IS THE RUM GONE?❞

❝On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your pain?❞

❝It is okay to cry. Crying is a natural response to pain.❞

❝What good is that act, unless every person in this kingdom first swears an oath to you? To both of us?❞

❝Welcome to the nerd lab.❞

❝The more important they think they are, the quicker they finish.❞

❝Stay silent, & perhaps they will spare you.❞

❝Wanna fight for me?❞

❝Hey, are you still alive?❞

❝You speak as though you have seen this yourself.❞

❝You’re late. You missed quite a show.❞

❝Such tragic lovers.❞

❝I honestly don’t find that to be romantic. It’s pathetic.❞

❝Love? You think love will save you?❞

❝Only fools believe that soulmates exist.❞

❝I don’t know why the hell you want to sit courtside, unless you’re THAT desperate for balls in your face.❞

❝Gather the sheets and burn them. They cannot find evidence of this.❞

❝The blood is in your hands, not mine.❞

❝You speak as though you are innocent in this.❞

❝You took their heart and destroyed it.❞

❝Do you like killing? Do you like to watch the fear in their eyes as you bring your blade even closer to them?❞

❝I do not fear death.❞

❝Am I in hell?❞

❝If you think for a moment, then you’ll find it.❞

❝I will not be meek or obedient.❞

❝You do not own me. I am not your property or anyone else’s for that matter.❞

❝And you think sleeping with someone who is married is going to add excitement to your life?❞

❝There are worst faiths.❞

❝I would rather die than be locked in a cage.❞

❝You can take that pen and shove it up your ass.❞

❝Let me see your face.❞

❝My computer is acting weirder than usual. Did you give it an energy drink or something?❞

❝TV makes shit look so easy.❞

❝I could try, but no promises.❞

❝I just want to go home and shower.❞

❝That cat looks like he wants to murder us in our sleep.❞

❝I think there are better things to do in this city other than gawk at the buildings.❞

❝Put. those. cookies. down.❞

❝Oh shit, I made a booboo.❞

❝Banana monkeys apple balls!❞

❝What sort of insult is that? My cat can do a better job.❞

❝I have my eye on you. And I mean one eye. The other one is keeping an eye on the other guy.❞

❝You’re quite defiant, aren’t you.❞

❝Hold your tongue, or I will cut it out myself.❞

❝Bring them BACK.❞

❝I shall go to my grave loving you. HATING YOU.❞

❝Those who refuse will die.❞

❝How do you forget?❞

❝This was supposed to be a surprise damn it.❞

❝High or low, they will sign or they will die.❞

❝I believe in choices, both good and bad.❞

❝I didn’t fall off the horse. I held on for dear life as the horse dragged me along for a period of many years.❞

❝Funny how things work out. You love me now, when I do not love you.❞

❝I hate you. I hate your desire & MINE.❞

❝Call it what you wish, but you and I both know it’s the truth.❞

❝Don’t speak to me as if you know what I am suffering through. You know nothing.❞

❝Shut your eyes then.❞

❝That child saved your life.❞

❝Hey if you ever need some RELIEF, you know where to go.❞

❝I am no whore, despite what you like to think.❞

❝Beauty fades.❞

❝Mac or PC, I don’t care.❞

❝Find a legal way then.❞

❝Their blood is on your hands. Not mine.❞

❝Can’t make a habit of this you know.❞

❝Can I stay with you? I can’t be alone to my thoughts. The darkness will claim me again.❞

❝You swore you would protect me!❞

❝You are a toad.❞

❝What did you do, roll around in pig shit?❞

❝Get out you snake.❞

❝If they hurt me, then I will close my eyes.❞

❝There is nothing you can say that hasn’t already been said.❞

❝Music is important. There are so many advantages.❞

❝I couldn’t sleep. Can I stay here?❞

❝You are my soul mate!❞

❝I once tried to read that. I couldn’t get through the book.❞

❝BURN ME THEN. Do you think I care now that you have taken everything from me?❞

❝To love? Or to spy?❞

❝Which witch is which?❞

❝I signed up for a fun adventure in a creepy mansion. I didn’t sign up for demons trying to murder me.❞

❝Who’s your daddy now?❞

❝I’ll be good, I promise.❞

❝Do you hate me so much you would do this?❞

❝I loved you! I gave you my heart & you stepped on it.❞

❝My love for you surpasses everything.❞

❝I am a fool, yes. But this fool loves you. Do you hear me? I love you.❞

❝Take it from me as best you can, but there will come a time that you can no longer deny it.❞

❝Will you give yourself to me?❞

❝Once, I think I could have loved you. But now, I think I can only despise you.❞

❝My heart cannot take this secrecy anymore. Why must I hide my feelings for you?❞

❝You can try.❞

❝I think that there are better ways to spend my time than to listen to their insults.❞

❝Pathetic.❞

❝Children? Oh no, I– I don’t think I can even have children.❞

❝Impossible things can be possible if you have enough hope.❞

❝Did they touch you?❞

❝I don’t think I can move.❞

❝The best time of year is when I can cuddle with you in front of the fire.❞

❝My heart belongs to one being and it is you.❞

❝I need help. I cannot face this alone.❞

❝You ask far too much. Please, don’t make me do this.❞

❝Are you pregnant?❞

❝I’m pregnant.❞

❝I’m sorry, but your child is dead.❞

❝Who is the father?❞

❝How can you love a person like him/her?❞

❝Monster!❞

❝You are not a monster. Stop thinking that you are!❞

❝There is nothing you could have done. Their life was forfeit the moment they left this place.❞

❝Y-You? What are you doing here?❞

❝The last dance you will ever have is with me.❞

❝We are two ships in the night.❞

❝The shadows grow darker.❞

❝It will not be long before the darkness consumes your heart.❞

❝You belong to me now.❞

❝You WITCH.❞

❝You sold your soul to the devil & for what?❞

❝Revenge will be mine.❞

❝The dogs will eat their fill of you and shit your remains onto the crags.❞

❝Our Grand Rite now is done. Blood dimmed dawn now shall come. Powers of the moon and sun ignite. All flesh trembles at the sight. Thirteen souls fed to hungry earth opens the way for our dark lord’s birth.❞

❝Oh this ain’t right. This ain’t right. Any fool can feel that, even this fool.❞

❝ I shall miss the dazzling wit of your conversation.❞

❝This is my vow. I will meet you here, before the moon goes above those trees. I swear it.❞

❝You know, my father said this was the land of second chances. This can be ours. All we have to do is walk away.❞

❝Living in here and not believing in witches is like living in London and not believing in fog. It is to deny what is right in front of you.❞

❝Love is a two-faced coin and one is certainly betrayal.❞

❝Love is not a lost cause. I will not betray the one true love of my life.❞

❝If. Such a small word with such immense consequence. For all of us.❞

❝The wine is from God. The drunkard is from the devil.❞

❝I recognize the symptoms of your illness, and it’s not called marsh fever. You’re with child.❞

❝He’s insane.❞

❝This is a good day for him.❞

❝If you knew my father, you’d commend me for waiting this long.❞

❝How long may we enjoy your curative presence in town?❞

❝There was a reason for my marriage. Remind me of it.❞

❝Is it murder to defend your mother’s honor?❞

❝And if these times have made you clever, the coming months may thrust genius upon you.❞

❝You care so much for someone you hardly know.❞

❝That was the bravest thing I’ve ever seen, like a man sticking his head inside a lion’s jaw. I would gladly reward you for your bravery.❞

❝All things are permissible in our dreams.❞

❝I believe trust needs to be earned.❞

❝The others bought and sold. We merely proved ourselves better at the game, but we draw the line at murder. Do we not?❞

❝I do tend to win whatever battles I fight.❞

❝You’re not the only one who knows what it feels like to hold desires that come true only in dreams. But every morning we have a choice – forget our dreams or live them.❞

❝True malice like that which powers the Grand Rite ferments best in a loveless heart. I have looked into your heart and it is anything but loveless.❞

❝And so the queen came to rule the king and all of his kingdom and thus became the Queen of the Night. And so she lived happily ever after.❞

❝For it was not by a kiss she might make a frog into a prince, but by a kiss that she make a king into a toad.❞

❝That night she felt one monster on top of her and another inside and she glimpsed what her soul was becoming and learned her first lesson as queen: be careful what you wish for.❞

❝You know the worst part about becoming a queen? You often have to marry a king.❞

❝Not all queens start as princesses.❞

❝Your eyes. So filled with want. The hard part is not getting what you want, child. The hard part is knowing what you want.❞

❝We had a deal.❞

❝I want to be just like you.❞

❝Sometimes in life we make choices. These choices in life they lead us to do things, terrible things and we don’t wish to, we’d do anything not to. Choice informs choice. They don’t resemble anything you’d have wanted or wish for. Tell me if it was like that. If it was a difficult choice. Please. Please. So that I may still believe in goodness.❞

❝I murdered 20 men and I make no excuses for myself. Will you have me arrested?❞

❝The dead don’t lie.❞

❝I am the only one that knows.❞

❝The next lie to cross your lips will be your last.❞

❝You would threaten me, your one true ally?❞

❝So you would buy me outright?❞

❝I want it to stop. The torture, the torment, the suffering… or I will tell them. I will tell them all who and what you are.❞

❝We know that what we desire and what we must do to survive are often at odds.❞

❝My husband’s affliction has robbed him of both reason and sense.❞

❝We’ve lost control. She’s no longer ours.❞

❝Why? Because this is the fulfillment of all our dreams. Vengeance for centuries of oppression.❞

❝I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a mixture of reason and bullshit in a man.❞

❝There was a time when I might have suckled more than a toad.❞

❝All the world shall be yours in return; all the world.❞

❝You asked who would do such a thing. The answer is many people.❞

❝The witch hunt has begun and we will be runninng the trials.❞

❝He/She has all the sweetness of an apple on a tree.❞

❝This dog will come back and bite.❞

❝Save your thoughts. Say nothing.❞

❝You must cry for me, for I have no more tears.❞

❝Where is the murderer?❞

❝Be careful, be very careful, or you might find yourself wearing peasant shoes.❞

❝You see I’ve lost everything in this town that I ever cared for. You however, you have everything left to lose. A sentiment that makes you vulnerable.❞

❝Do not stare at him in public. It weakens you.❞

❝The only thing keeping me alive is the look on your face.❞

❝All things return, like every salty tear returns to the sea.❞

❝They will hunt and kill and drown in their very own blood till there’s no one left standing.❞

[kellpyre-blog]

I hope you all like Darren’s placeholder bio I worked very hard on it

[kellpyre-blog]

                    independent, selective, & fandomless original species character

                                                     Written by AL

[kellpyre-blog]

Creature Studies - Kellpyres

Origin

Kellpyres are a lesser known cousin to vampires. Unlike vampires, who can grow their numbers through biting their victims and transferring the disease, the strain that creates kellpyres can only be spread by one progenitor, a being called Yaré. The kellpyre strain has a very low success rate and has only been successful in infecting and turning deceased infants, stillborn or otherwise. The host is left in a dormant state for nearly a year while the disease finishes growing the body, after which the host will awaken, often in their monstrous form to survive the process of their “birth” and satisfy the hunger that accompanies it.

Folklore

The first sighting of a kellpyre was in Switzerland, 1451 AD. A creature of pure malevolence tore through a mountain village, killing a handful of men and women. This was later thought to have been a bear attack, though none could explain why the village children were unharmed. Similar sightings were later seen in Hungary and Romania throughout the late 16th - 17th centuries. Romania especially suffered from such events, and superstitions surrounding the creature’s origins abounded. Most of the lore concerning their weaknesses was taken from vampire lore, given their similarity. Kellpyres were thought to be a more brutal, animalistic half-breed conceived out of wedlock between a local woman and a foreign man, the latter often assumed to be a vampire.

Strengths & Weaknesses

Kellpyres have less weaknesses and less strengths than their vampire relatives. They are immortal, but like a human, can be killed if their body is too heavily damaged or too much blood is lost. However, they heal slightly faster than humans, faster at night, and near-instantly when standing in direct moonlight. Exposure to sunlight only causes mild skin irritation.

As one might expect, they need to drink blood to survive and have retractable fangs to accomplish the deed. This is done for the plasma within the blood, and the antibodies it contains. Though they cannot die to human diseases, kellpyres are still susceptible to them, given that their own forms no longer produce antibodies. Staying well fed keeps them healthy and their werebat form contained. Because kellpyres drink blood to replenish their own plasma levels, they can only drink blood that is compatible with their blood type. They can identify safe people by smell.

They possess two distinct forms, excluding their human appearance: bat and werebat. They can turn into a regular bat at will in a quick and painless transition. In this form, they keep the same strength and weaknesses as their human form.

Their werebat form is much more volatile; it’s a slower, painful transformation into a giant bat/human hybrid. Most stand anywhere from six to seven feet in this form, growing extensively in size compared to their normal heights. If a kellpyre is too blood starved and weak, they will begin to shift into this form as a manner of protection, using the last of their strength to feed. Kellpyres in this state are vicious, mindless, and can do nothing but devour prey until their hunger is satisfied. Their preferred prey is adult humans, regardless of blood type. No matter how old or experienced a kellpyre may be, they will never obtain control over this form. The shifts can also be influenced by Yaré, who only needs to physically contact them to start the change.

Lastly, they possess some greater attributes compared to humans. They are moderately stronger than a human of similar build, as well as having moderately better senses (sight, smell, and hearing). They can move extremely fast when they want to.