directly after their last encounter xavier thought the next time he saw her he would be filled with rage, but when she sat down across him he didn’t feel anything but soul-crushing sadness. his stomach hurt, and he found himself wishing he had something stronger than coffee in the cup he was clutching tightly in his hands. he bit his lip and kept his eyes trained on his laptop screen, trying his hardest not to say anything to her. he held in his words until he felt like he would burst, “i would never actually do it, you know.” as he spoke his eyes never moved from the screen, “i wouldn’t kill harold. i could never kill someone. especially someone who means so much to you.” that, of course, was a lie. in the past couple weeks especially xavier had wondered what would happen if he killed himself, and up until recently makena had been his best friend. however, he wasn’t sure if that was ever something he could do, which was part of why he had egged her on when she threatened to kill him. if she had killed him, he wouldn’t have to do it himself. “you don’t have to worry about harold- i’m not going to do anything to him.” he took a sip of his coffee, his eyes still refusing to meet hers if she was even looking at him.
makena, on the other hand, wished she could feel something other than rage toward him. her blood boiled as the seconds ticked by painfully long as she sat there, her fingers tapping away on her phone though she actually wasn’t doing anything, she just wanted to appear too busy wrapped up in her own world to acknowledge him. she wished it was that way too, that she wasn’t so aware of his presence and that by simply scrolling through her phone, her mind could forget every single emotion she felt when around xavier. sure, there was anger and resentment, but she couldn’t help but feel pity and sadness and repressed love that she tried so incredibly hard to rid herself of these emotions but try as she might, there was no denying that those feelings would stick with her. however, when he spoke and brought up harold, her jaw tensed with the ever-prominent anger. “excuse me?” a thick brow raised in question as her frustration was easily translated in her tone of voice, her coffee cup meeting with the table as she leaned forward to finally look at his face. he wasn’t looking at her, which was probably good because her looks could nearly kill, but she’d be damned if her eyes left his. “you don’t fucking make DEATH THREATS to my goddamned boyfriend,” it surprised even her that she wasn’t yelling, “you don’t make me get a fucking ulcer WORRYING about his safety, you don’t--...look at me, coward.” her hand darted to the back of his laptop and forced the screen down, the loud noise startling most of the coffee shop’s inhabitants. “i’m glad you had no real intention of killing him, i really am, but do you have ANY idea how physically sick i’ve gotten over worrying about this? how i’ve had to mentally prepare myself if you meant what you said? I HAD TO THINK ABOUT LOSING THE LOVE OF MY LIFE ALL BECAUSE YOU CAN’T DEAL WITH YOUR OWN FUCKING PROBLEMS, AND THREATENED TO KILL HIM.” now her voice was raised, slightly below a yell, but she didn’t care. every nerve ending in her body was electrified and her hands we shaking, as was the rest of her body, her eyes embarrassingly watering. “you don’t care about me anymore, xavier, if you did you never would’ve falsely put my boyfriend in peril.”
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