Waxing Poetic

Person, Parent, Writer- 23, They/Them- Garcia

[kendrawontfindmehere]

About me, the writer, parent, person <3

Name: Garcia 🇲🇽

Age: 23 🎸

Pronouns: They/Them/She 💛🤍🖤💜

Favorite color: yellow 💛 followed closely by burgundy ❤️💜

Favorite food: ice cream 🍦

Favorite book: The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Kate DiCamillo 🧸🐰

Favorite movie: Superman (2025) and Knives Out (2019) ❤️💙💛🔎🗡️

Song currently on loop: “Five Years Time” by Noah and the Whales, also “Meet Me in the Woods” by Lord Huron

Likes: James Gunn projects, horror films with lots of little details, books that hit me hard, velvety sweaters and body con dresses, cardigans, transparent glass serve-ware <3

Dislikes: the devil’s material known as microfiber, accidentally scraping my teeth against wood, condescending people, rudeness, mustard, potato salad, deviled eggs.

MBTI: ENFP-T

SMR: Cancer sun, Scorpio Moon, Aquarius rising

Midwesterner living elsewhere ✨

[cottoncandylesbo]

i like it when people compliment me. i like it... when people like me. (looks around to make sure nobody is about to shoot me)

[kendrawontfindmehere]

i hesitate before touching the door handle not only because i know you like holding the door for me, but i’ve also realized i quite enjoy your kindness.

[kisxmesoft]

[antifascistelmo-deactivated2022]

No matter how progressive or well-read you are, there are always going to be moments in your life where somebody pushes back against something that's so culturally ingrained you never even considered it before. And you'll say "Huh, it never occurred to me to challenge this but you're right" and that doesn't mean you were "morally toxic" before, it means you're a non-omniscient human capable of growth.

[kosmogrl]

june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be good june will be

[porcelainmeat]

[alltimesos]

“are you ok?” no but I’m funny

[babefromthedead]

i always feel like im being left behind

[fairylilies]

i’m so sorry if someone made you think it’s hard to love you

[lustcannibalism]

ok I endured it. now what!!!!!!!!!

[lustcannibalism]

[lovecrumbss]

pink spring * Wilhelm Schnarrenberger/Jacqueline Williams/Hugo Grenville/Émile Schuffenecke/Frederick Carl Frieseke/Robert Schiff/James Ensor/Emilia Castañeda

[persianmom-deactivated20260602]

hate that I was understanding when I should’ve just been a cunt

[kendrawontfindmehere]

i know it’s okay to close my eyes when tiny fingers begin to trace my knuckles and the little sighs become more frequent

i hope death comes to me like a small child taking my hand and pulling me towards the light with big eyes and a toothy grin

i hope death makes me push him on the swings and i hope he demands i watch him go down the big slide while we await my judgement

i hope that when it’s time to pick a direction, death gives me a little wave and smiles and tells me “bye-bye!”

i hope even in death i get to see the love that loved me most even when i was clumsy and sad and lonely

i hope i can cling onto this hope the way they wrapped their little hands around my finger when they were tiny

i hope that when death comes, it’s much much softer than life and that it’s as warm and sweet as sunshine

i hope when i die, that it’s them guiding me to the light or to the stars or wherever because they’re all that ever guides me now

i can’t trust the stars or the light or the moon, but i can trust hazel eyes and messy hair and tiny sandals moving faster than the rest of us can keep up with

those tiny beings made of big squeezes and strawberries and laughter are all i could ever trust to walk away from my bed

i hope death comes to me in echoing pitter patters down a long hallway until i see the familiar little lights i know as my favorite eyes

i hope death offers me little hands to hold as we walk towards the next phase of existence.

[kendrawontfindmehere]

i wonder if i should start stopping by the side of the road to pull the roadkill off the interstate.

i’ve thought about it since i was little but was always too embarrassed to admit it.

i was bullied by family members for placing a small dandelion on a mouse that had been caught in a sharp trap

i thought it was unfortunate- being killed just for the crime of being small and hungry when i’d been small and hungry and caught in a sharp trap as well

are they all like me and still feel the bruising and crushing of tires or metal snaps even after they’ve moved on? were they born small and hungry and did they die small and hungry and alone?

did they at least have someone stop by to let the rest of their kin know that they lost someone, as small and insignificant as they were?

does the horse know it’s born just to break his leg and turn to glue?

does an armadillo know people are glad to be rid of its leprosy and does it watch as cars speed by with wide-eyed kids staring and asking their mom what that was back there?

will i watch my body be lowered into the ground instead of incinerated? will i watch a priest pray over my body as my soul bursts into flames for the evil i’ve done?

just another reason i’d like my body to sink before anyone could find me and fill me with formaldehyde and make up my face in a way my friends would laugh at

would you move my body from the road after running me over?

would you put a small dandelion on my corpse after killing me for being small and hungry?

would you tell my kids what they just saw back there?

i think they would know. they’ve always been smart like that. i think you would tell them. i hope you’ll tell them and not give them some bullshit answer. you can be honest with them. they’re strong and i know they’ll be stronger than i was.

[kendrawontfindmehere]

i’m sorry i’m not what you wanted

i blame myself so much for what happened with you two.

i blame myself for losing the kids

i blame myself for everything that’s wrong with me- hoping that i’d be just as sick and wrong on the outside as i am on the inside and i got my wish at the worst moment possible

i’m sorry for the inconvenience that i’ve become- i’m tired and bitter and wrong and broken

i don’t fuck like i used to, i don’t cook, all i do is cry and complain and sleep and get mad

i’m not who you became friends with

i’m hardly who you married in the first place

i feel like i just get worse and worse

i’m sorry

i try really hard to have good days

i really fucking try

i’m pretty sure my friends and everyone around me are over me bc i’ve just become this sad little shell of a person

i’m hoping spending time with friends might help even though the whole time i’m convinced they hate dragging me with them on errands and plans

i think the boys are the only two humans left that love me and even then, one day they’re gonna get old and find out their mom is human and they’re gonna see me for what i am

texts i shouldn’t have actually sent- part 1/?

[shadowseductress]

Not now, sweetheart. Mother ’s busy yearning for a version of life that no longer exists and never will again.