Kepnerisms

An independent && Selective RP blog for April Kepner from Grey's Anatomy, but as written as an OC for literally any other fandom.

[kepnerisms]

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝑲𝒆𝒑𝒏𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝒕𝒐𝒐. 𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝑰 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎, 𝒊𝒕 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆, 𝒂 𝒕𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌 𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒄, 𝒂 𝒇𝒂𝒊𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒒𝒖𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 𝒑𝒐𝒓𝒌, 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒃𝒍𝒆. 𝒀𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝒊𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒚 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒏 𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒓𝒔 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑲𝒆𝒑𝒏𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈.

An independent & Selective April Kepner who was once a part of ABC's Grey's Anatomy written as an OC in various other fandoms such as One Chicago , Marvel , 911 , Hawaii 5 0 , and Many others. ᵇᵉᶜᵃᵘˢᵉ ᵃᵇᶜ ᵈᶤᵈᶰ'ᵗ ᵈᵉˢᵉʳᵛᵉ ʰᵉʳ ( Established : 2024 && loved by Myllie )

♡ ˙ ˖ ✧ — | carrd | memes | wishlist |

𝑨 𝑺𝒕𝒖𝒅𝒚 𝑰𝒏 : compassion , finding & losing hope , holding on by a thread to faith , standing her ground , the black sheep , being a hero to others and ones self, conversations with ones demons but never giving control , a perfectly good heart.

[etfuturist]

𝒘𝒉𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒉𝒊𝒎 ? He doesn’t flinch, doesn’t shift, but the question settles deep in his chest like a weight. He stares at the holographic display in front of him, but the numbers, the projections, the threat they represent—it all blurs for a moment. Her voice is soft, almost broken, and that’s what gets to him. He knows she’s right. She always is, in that frustrating way of hers. But Tony never learned how to stand still. He’s always been the guy who acts, who calculates the odds and does what needs doing because, for him, there’s no alternative. And yet, the way she says his name—it’s the same tone she uses when she traces the scars on his chest after one of those long nights where sleep refuses to come. He doesn’t turn to face her. If he does, if he meets her eyes, he’ll falter. And faltering isn't an option. Not when the stakes are this high. But the crack in her voice echoes in his head, and for the first time in a long while, Tony feels the pull of something more personal than the mission. It’s not the world needing him this time. It’s her.

He breathes in sharply, letting the silence stretch between them like a fragile thread. " April, " his voice is low, almost too quiet for the space they’re in, "I don’t know how not to be this guy. " It’s not an answer, not really, but it’s the only truth he can give her. He’s spent years convincing the world that Tony Stark has it all figured out, that he’s the man who can save everyone. But when it comes to this—putting her before everything else—he’s lost. Helpless, even. And it’s terrifying. " I wish I could tell you I won’t go. " He clenches his jaw, resisting the urge to turn around, resisting the urge to close the space between them. "But if I don’t... What if something happens ? What if it all falls apart because I wasn’t there ? "

[kepnerisms]

𝑆𝘩𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑠𝑢𝑝𝑝𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑒, 𝑜𝑓 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒 𝑠𝘩𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑒𝑠. She knows what she signed up for the moment she confessed her love for him. But the simple fact is that she worries and she always will. That is just part of her nature when it comes to those she loves. And she loves him more than she could imagine loving anyone. And of course it has to be his heart, his desire and drive to help others that caused her to fall head over heels in love to begin with. Not the money, not the playboy façade, not even his snappy witty comebacks he has when it comes to her. Even if the one-liners are priceless, they are not what has her standing here pleading with him now.

She knows that she can't force him to stay. She could fight it until she's blue in the face but she knows Tony and she knows his heart. But the dangers -- April is always so afraid that one day he isn't going to come back and that'll leave her with nothing but an empty life, and a broken heart.

❝ Just promise me -- Promise me you'll come home. ❞ even if she knows he can't make that kind of promise she wants to make him do so anyway.

❝ Because I am not raising a child by myself, Anthony Stark, you hear me? ❞

[etfuturist]

// ❛ 𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝖽𝗈𝗇'𝗍 𝗍𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝗆𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝖽𝗈 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗅𝗅 𝖽𝗈. ❜ // — @kepnerisms

𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔𝒏’𝒕 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏 around to know the expression on her face—somewhere between fear and frustration, maybe even a little desperation. April has that effect on him, making him second-guess, making him want to be more than just the man in the suit. But old habits die hard, and Tony Stark has always been a man driven by the need to fix things, to stay one step ahead of disaster, even if it means stepping into danger. He exhales, dragging a hand over his face, eyes closing for a brief second. The irony isn’t lost on him. April was supposed to be his anchor, the one to pull him back from the brink, and yet here he is again—on the precipice of something reckless, something she won’t understand.

His gaze sharpens as he opens his eyes, still not turning to face her. The guilt snake its way up his spine, a familiar, unwelcome sensation tightening his chest. His jaw clenches instinctively, and his fingers curl into a fist by his side, knuckles whitening as if he can physically crush the feeling away. He forces his gaze back to the holographic display, the cold, logica l numbers grounding him in the illusion of control. " April, " he starts, his voice quieter than he intends, almost pleading. He doesn’t want to hurt her, but he’s Tony Stark. He can’t not be the guy who does what needs to be done, even if it scares the hell out of her. " I have to do this. Because if I don’t... who will ? "

[kepnerisms]

𝑻𝒐 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒊𝒔 𝒂 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒐 , she knew what she was getting into the moment that she fell in love with him. But that doesn't mean that she doesn't want him to sometimes put himself first over the world. Maybe, selfishly, put her first before the world. She knows that she can't ask him to do that , but she can let him know what she's thinking and feeling and this is what she's thinking and feeling right now.

April doesn't want him to do this. He refuses to face her and she knows why. If he looks into her eyes to see that she wants him to stay it'll be hard for him to do what it is she knows he needs to do.

There are days, truly, she hates that he managed to get her to question her faith all the more though it's never unwavering. If God is real, why isn't he helping? Why burden Tony with all of these things and make him be the hand that does the deed? But she has to realize that there are things that are happening for a reason. Even if she doesn't understand it. No one made a handbook for this kind of thing.

And she hates it.

❝ Tony...❞ she sighs. ❝ Please...you're not the only Avenger. So why..why does it always have to be you ? ❞

[kepnerisms]

The moment I come back to this blog just to write how heartbreaking it is that April goes to Arizona in a panic when she's pregnant with Harriett because she has no idea what a healthy baby feels like when it's moving and kicking, because Samuel didn't do those things.

[kepnerisms]

[kepnerisms]

They shake their heads sayin', "God, help her" When I tell 'em he's my man But your good Lord doesn't need to lift a finger I can fix him, no, really, I can

[kepnerisms]

[wachtraeumen]

𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒔 even more as he listens to April's attempt to backpedal. Despite the biting words exchanged, there is a part of him that understands the impulse behind her concerns—even if they feel invasive. His stance relaxed slightly, but his tone still carries the distinctive sharpness of a man pushed to his limits.

❝ It’s all I want, April. Is it really that hard to just leave it be ? ❞ the Jersey grit in his voice unmistakable as he responds, the irritation clear but controlled. ❝ We ain’t exactly close, you know ? Sure, we've flirted a bit, and yeah, you've seen me laid out here more than I’d like—. But that don’t give you, or anyone else for that matter, the right to get all up in my business about who I'm seeing. ❞ He pauses, his gaze searching hers for a moment, trying to decipher the concern that seems so out of place. ❝ I thought you were just being a good doctor, but this ? It's more than that, isn't it ? But listen, if you're saying you'll back off from here on out... good. That’s all I’m asking for. Let's keep it that way. I don’t need to hear anything more from you. ❞

[kepnerisms]

𝑯𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚'𝒓𝒆 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒄𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒆 , and that stings more than the words that left her own mouth. She thought ... doesn't matter. She was wrong. ❝ You're right. We're not close. We're not...❞ there is a pause as she has to look away ; the sadness hard to ignore in her eyes. ❝ You're just my patient. And we should keep it professional. So I will not give you unsolicited advice on your life and you...will only see me the next time you need something patched.❞

It hurts, those words, now hanging heavy on her heart. It shouldn't, but damn, she thought that they were at least friends with their banter and flirting but he's made it clear that they're nothing aside from doctor and patient but maybe they shouldn't even be that.

❝ You know what? Maybe it's better if you just get a whole other doctor all together. Next time you come in ask for anyone else. That way you don't have to worry about me interfering with you at all. ❞

[wachtraeumen]

𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒄𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒊𝒓, suggesting he is too broken to help anyone, not least himself, Matthew came to a dead stop. His expression hardens, eyebrows drawing together, jaw clenching visibly as he to process the sting of her comment. The remark feels like an attack, an undeserved one, even if part of him whispered that maybe there is truth in her harshness. Yet, what irked him more is the presumptuous shade cast on Taylor by mere assumptions. All they are tossing his way are guesses about her, just assumptions. He can't lay out all the answers about Taylor, but really, do they have the right to throw around those opinions when they don't even know her like he thinks he does ?

Shaking his head, his hands find their familiar perch on his hips, a defensive gesture as familiar to him as his own reflection. ❝ You know, I don't need your worry, ❞ he shoots back, his voice thick with frustration. ❝ For someone who says they don't wanna see me backslide into my old ways, you're doing one hell of a job keeping me stuck right there. Here I am, trying to pull something—anything—together, and all you and Danny do is shoot down every damn choice I make. It's like you think I'm some kid who doesn't know jack about life. I've had enough of that my whole life, one damn failure after another. I’m trying to pull myself up, but it feels like you're there to remind me of how I could fall. I'm trying to get up from this, not be dragged down by more doubt. ❞

[kepnerisms]

𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒚, 𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏 but it's how it came out and she knows it. And she's sorry it came out that way. A deep breath taken as he returns the favor in his words. She is sorry, so very sorry that she said what she said but she can't take it back now. "I didn't mean that, Matt..." she tries to reassure, but she knows that since it's out there it's going to add the layer of armor he's already worn around everyone else.

❝ I don't think you're a kid who doesn't know jack, Matt. I just ...I know your heart and I know women like her. She's just going to hurt you. ❞ but how can she tell, how can she prove it to him other than let him make this mistake. But she doesn't want to see him hurt. Truth is she cares too much about him to let that happen -- and she realizes she shouldn't care this much. He's a patient, not a friend. Even if she sees him more than her own friends and he knows enough about her at this point. It doesn't matter, he was never hers to begin with. And he's right, she shouldn't worry about him that way.

❝ But if you want us to butt-out of your relationship, consider it done. You won't hear from me about it again. ❞

[wachtraeumen]

𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒘 𝒇𝒖𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒘, his lips press into a thin line, the tension more than obvious. Like the air could crackle with his frustration, hands set firmly on his hips as he shakes his head, the gesture sharp, almost dismissive. ❝ Wow, ❞ he starts, his voice tinged with that familiar edge of irritation. ❝ Sure, I've had my... flings. And yeah, maybe I don't know exactly what I've got with Tailor yet. She's a redhead, alright, and I've never made a secret of my... preferences. But what’s it to you ? ❞ His frustration seems to peak, his voice rising just a notch as he addresses her bitterness. His eyes darting away for a moment, perhaps recalling the times he and April have flirted endlessly, though he never crossed that line with her. That's just it. They flirted, nothing more. And maybe he did hold back with her because she’s not like others.

❝ To you, it looks like a mess waiting to happen, but she's not how you or anyone else sees her. ❞ there his voice softens slightly, his demeanor shifting as he tries to explain the unexplainable. ❝ She's got her own baggage, stuff with her dad... and maybe that's what draws me to her. Maybe I'm trying to fix something there—God knows why. ❞ ❝ I don't even know why I bother talking about this with you or Danny. Hell, maybe you two should get together and have a good whine about all my bad choices. I really don't get why you sound so bitter, even more than Danny does. ❞

[kepnerisms]

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒓𝒅 and not judge him based on his choice of girlfriend. Maybe it's jealousy talking but she can just feel it in her bones that Taylor is not good for him. That yes, she has her own baggage but Matt has more than enough of his own. ❝ Oh, please. You can't even fix yourself how are you going to fix her ? ❞

Though as soon as that leaves her mouth she pauses and covers her mouth quickly. ❝ I didn't mean that, Matt, I am so sorry... I just ... ❞ she takes a deep, steady breath as she tries to draw back from what she just said.

❝ We just want you to be happy, but Taylor ... when it comes down to it is she really going to be there for you or is she going to be there for her own interests ..? ❞ She's glad that Danny also feels the same about her as April does, but she can see why that would also feel like an attack on Matt so she needs to say something, do something so this doesn't end with both of them saying something they'll both regret. Though she already has and it's written on her face.

❝ I just worry about you, I've seen your worst. I don't want to see you there again...❞

[greystextposts]

[kepnerisms]

  𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒐𝒎 𝑺𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒘 𝑽𝒂𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒏 @wachtraeumen

𝑰𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈. They're barely even friends. He is just a guy who comes in sometimes because work hurts ; and they flirt. They banter. But they are not friends. Not even if she texts sometimes to check in. Not even if he returns the favor. He's dating someone now ; a journalist. Who is she to say anything about it ? His life is his life - not her concern. And yet she knows that this woman has a reputation.

❝ I'm not sure what you want me to say. Other than I'm not surprised you went for a redhead ; you seem to have a taste.❞ she happens to say with distaste.

❝ Though an officer of the law dating a journalist -- that seems like a bad idea but as we know you're great at those. ❞ she tried to not sound so bitter but...

April is not good at hiding her emotions.

[hopeswanjones]

The problem isn’t that I broke my promise, that’s not the problem. The problem is.. the problem is.. that is felt good. It felt good. I shouldn’t have taken advantage. Taken advantage, what?! We should, we should go. ..taken advantage? I kissed you remember? 

[kepnerisms]

@wachtraeumen

[kepnerisms]

[wachtraeumen]

⊹ · ⸻ @kepnerisms ; answered dream letter :

ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ . - ᴍᴀᴛᴛ ᴠ.

𝒂 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒇𝒖𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒇𝒖𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒘 𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔 his brow as April says he isn't interested in anyone. Her words sting, a sharp jab despite her damn adorable self. There's a flicker of truth to her accusation. Since his divorce, his love life's been a disaster zone. Hell, even before that, it wasn't exactly sunshine and rainbows. But true to form, Matthew downplays it all, all buttoned up and curtains closed. Not about to let anyone see the man behind the badge, especially not if there's a chance she might hit a nerve.

With a dry chuckle, he crosses his arms, crossing over his chest. ❝ You think you got me all figured out, huh, Kepner❞ He leans in a touch, a playful glint in his eyes, though it doesn't quite reach them fully. It's flirtatious, sure. ❝ But maybe…I am interested in someone.❞

[kepnerisms]

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒂 𝒈𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒖𝒑 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌 and that's all she's willing to give him before she turns her attention back down to it. The thing about Matt is he's a very handsome man -- one April could see herself falling for against her best intentions. But he locks himself up and tries to wear that façade like no one can see through it. She likes to think she knows better than that.

When he leans in she looks at him again noticing that glint in his eyes and she puts a hand to her hip. He says he's interested in someone, maybe. And April gives him a smile. The one that is coated in sarcasm.

❝ Being interested in yourself isn't something to brag about. You're aware pride is a deadly sin, right ? ❞

[kepnerisms]

𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒋𝒐𝒃 she knew that it wouldn't be all rainbows and butterflies. At first she was working for a guy who favored science and accomplishment over anything else. Himself was all he thought about. She wasn't keen on the idea that his way of making money was making war weapons. But the reason she was hired was because of everything that happened to him and she saw him change from the playboy she heard and read about into a man with integrity.

There were moments he could frighten her such as not informing her of the condition of his heart and what was in his chest, which lead to a series of hilarious moments.

While they debate religion, he's never once talked down to her about her beliefs. He never hid who he was or what he was about from anyone and taking responsibility for being Iron Man? That took some bravery ; more so to keep doing what he's doing.

There is a reason things happen, a reason she got that call and was picked out of so many other applicants for this job. There is a path for her, one planned out with details she may not understand but she respects it. He might call her naive for believing it, but she does. As she watches him work and scolds the dummy bot he made she smiles, shaking her head laughing as she taps her fingers against her ipad corner.

❝ Don't stress.❞ she told him. ❝ What did I tell you about that ? .❞

But as he turns and smiles back at her with that twinkle in his eye and that casual shrug April knew something. She knows she loves him. She knew she loved him.

Maybe even before she met him ... Looking away she goes back to work. What does it matter though? She's his doctor. And he's Iron Man.

It'd never work.

Send 🎶 for me to shuffle my muse's playlist and write a starter based on the song that plays! @etfuturist

Song : I Knew I Loved You Artist : Savage Garden

[alliecathayes]

9K MAKE ME CHOOSE:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ @laylakeating ASKED: April Kepner or Izzie Stevens?

When we follow the protocols we don't skip steps. People live, simple as that. You know you're right. I probably won't be chief resident, but the checklists work. You can't tell me they don't.