kelsey @kgunt12 - Tumblr Blog

the heartbreak kid’s best friend// shawn michaels

I didn’t mind being known as his best friend. It wasn’t something that often bothered me, but it bothered me when people backstage didn’t even know my name. They just referred to me as Shawn’s best friend. It got to the point where even The British Bulldog forgot my name and just called me “The Heartbreak Kid’s best friend”.

There was only one person who truly knew how I felt about Shawn. Hunter Hearst Helmsley was that one person. He was one of my closest friends and it felt so good to finally tell someone about my true feelings. It felt like a small weight was lifted off my shoulders.

Hunter, Chyna, and I stood backstage watching Shawn fight Goldust. It was a pretty good fight for Shawn, not so much for Goldust. After he hit Sweet Chin Music, he pinned Dustin and the iconic Shawn Michaels music hit. He did his usual thing in the ring, dancing around, showing off, being his cute ass self. And of course he went to the audience, giving his love to the fans, but he stopped at a particular blonde girl with a tiny waist and bright green eyes. A smirk was plastered on his face as he chatted her up.

I turned my head and looked away. I could feel Hunter’s eyes on me as I grabbed my bag from the floor. It wasn’t anyone’s fault that I felt this way. It was mine own because I couldn’t bring myself to tell Shawn how I really felt. He was my best friend, my person. I couldn’t allow myself to lose that.

“Tell Shawn I said congrats on the win. I gotta be up early tomorrow,” My voice came out small, a fake smile plastered on my lips.

Chyna gave me a hug, “We will! You get some sleep girlfriend,”

“Get home safe, okay?” Hunter said and pressed a kiss to my forehead. I nodded.

It felt weird not seeing Shawn after he match, but I just wanted to go home and go to bed. I felt emotionally drained. I threw on an oversized shirt, that was most likely Shawn’s, and laid down, my eyes instantly closing.

Ring! Ring!

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!”

I got out of bed and stomped my way over to my phone. If it was something stupid I was gonna freak the fuck out! My eyes glanced over at the clock. 2:37 a.m.

I grabbed the phone, “Hello?”

“Hey, it’s Shawn,”

“H-Hi. Is something wrong? Are you okay?” I asked, my mind racing.

He chuckled, “You worry too much! But, yeah, I’m good. I just wanted to call and ask why you left so early? I didn’t get to see you after my match,”

He actually cared about that?

“Oh, um, I have to be up early tomorrow for work. I didn’t wanna be out too late. Didn’t really think you cared so much about me being there,” I mumbled the last part.

“Of course I care! You’re my good luck charm, baby! You’re gonna be at the Royal Rumble, right?” he asked and I could hear the concern in his voice.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, “Yeah. Yeah Shawn I’ll be there,”

“See you then, (Y/n)! Love you!,”

“Love you too,”

royal rumble 1995

My eyes glanced over my outfit in the mirror. The Levi’s clung to my curves and my Heartbreak Kid shirt looked great with my subtle red lip. I could feel my nerves begin to rise as I waited with Chyna backstage. All I could think about was what Shawn was gonna think of my outfit, and the fact that I haven’t seen him in 2 weeks.

“I can’t believe Pamela Anderson is gonna be here tonight! She’s gorgeous,” Shawn’s voice boomed from down the hall.

Hunter laughed, “Yeah, she’s pretty,”

Shawn walked into his dressing room, his eyes landing on me. The look on his face was unreadable. I knew he was mad at me. I mean I didn’t answer a lot of his calls and when I did I cut the conversations short. I would be pissed off too. My eyes trailed over his sparkly outfit and all I could think about was how good he looked.

Arms wrapped around my shoulders, “Hey baby girl! I’ve missed you these past couple weeks,” Hunter spoke.

“I’ve missed you too, Hunter. Just been really busy lately,” I said, smiling up at him. He smiled back and pressed a kiss to my cheek.

“Can you guys give us a minute?” Shawn asked.

Chyna nodded and grabbed Hunter’s arm, dragging him out into the hallway. My anxiety was creeping up on me, hard. I rubbed my sweaty palms on my jeans and swallowed the lump in my throat, taking a seat.

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

I looked up to meet Shawn’s eyes, “I-I, um, I’ve just been really busy. It wasn’t intentional,”

“If it wasn’t intentional then why are you stuttering? You only stutter when you lie, which isn’t often,” he spoke, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You wouldn’t understand, Shawn. And that’s cool. I’m okay now,” I said.

He hand landed on my knee, “What wouldn’t I understand?”

All I could do in that moment was push his hand off my knee and create as much distance as possible between us. He didn’t get to do that. He didn’t get to act all lovey and cuddly, then go and give it to someone else. It hurt too much.

“I’m gonna wait with Chyna backstage. Good luck in the rumble, not that you’re gonna need it,” I said, flashing him a small smile.

“No! We’re not done talking yet. Why won’t you just fucking talk to me? Did I do something to upset you?” he asked and reached for me, but I avoided his eyes.

The door flew open, “Shawn you’ve got 2 minutes,”

Talk about saved by the damn backstage worker.

“We’re not done talking about this. I’ll see you after the rumble. You better be here when I’m done,” he whispered and kissed my forehead.

I just nodded at him. Little did he know, I wasn’t gonna be here when he was done. I was gonna stay and watch him fight, but that was all. It may be shitty of me to do that. I knew that. Yet, I knew that I couldn’t watch him parade around with Pamela Anderson if he won. I just couldn’t.

Hunter and I watched as Shawn tried to team up with one of the last guys left. He wanted to team up against The British Bulldog, which was smart. It just ended up back firing on him. Shawn was the first person to start this match and I was so incredibly happy that he lasted to the final 2. Him and The British Bulldog were left.

It all happened too fast. Everyone in that damn arena thought HBK was out, but only one of his feet hit the floor and he eliminated the last man. My best friend had just won the 1995 Royal Rumble. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing! So much love and happiness was exploding out of me.

“He did it! Holy shit!” Chyna yelled, wrapping me up in a hug.

I couldn’t stop smiling, “I’m so proud of him!” I yelled back.

My eyes turned back to the screen and what I saw made my heart stop. The beautiful Pamela Anderson hugging, flirting, and grinning from ear to ear at Shawn. A kiss was planted on his cheek, a smirk planted on his lips. A hand landed on my waist. Hunter’s hand to be exact.

“It’s my fault ya know. If I would just be honest with him then maybe I wouldn’t feel so fucking shitty,” I spoke and looked at Hunter.

“He’s not entirely the smartest person alive. I love him, don’t get me wrong. I mean he’s my best friend, but it’s his loss for not seeing this beautiful girl. You’re amazing and I truly mean that, baby girl,”

Hunter smiled down at me and I pressed a kiss onto his cheek, wrapping my arms around his neck. His arms snaked around my waist and lifted me off of my tip toes, a giggle escaping my throat. He was such a cutie sometimes.

“Where’s my hug at?” Shawn asked, his hands on his hips. Hunter let me go and I made my way over to my best friend.

I grinned, “Congratulations on your win! You deserve it, Michaels,”

He grabbed my hips and hugged me like his life depended on it. My air supply was getting cut short due to him squeezing me so hard, but I didn’t really mind. He hasn’t hugged me like this in forever. It felt good.

“I’m so happy you stayed,” he whispered.

“You asked me too,” I said and pressed my face into his neck, a smile on my face.

“I know I did, but you’ve been really distant lately. I didn’t really think you were gonna stay. I’ve just missed that gorgeous face of yours, pretty girl,”

A laugh erupted from my mouth, “Is that all you miss?”

“You know that’s not what I mean!” He exclaimed and started attacking my sides with his fingers, tickling me. I was a giggling mess with everyone around me laughing. The smile on Shawn’s face was priceless.

“Stop! Shawn, please stop!” I pleaded.

He stopped his assault on my stomach and pressed a big kiss onto the corner of my mouth. I could feel my breathe get caught in my throat and butterflies erupt in my stomach. If only he knew what he did to me.

“Shawny! Oh, Shawny!”

We all turned our heads at the Australian accent. Pamela Anderson waltzed on into the dressing room, batting her long lashes at Shawn. Her hand landed on his bicep as she gave him a big smirk. She was stunning, super stunning. How was I suppose to compete with that?

I tuned out everything that came out of her mouth as I played with the bracelet on my wrist. It was a beaded one that I made for Shawn and I. His had my name on it and mine had his, a small smile making its way onto my face thinking of the memory. He was so excited when I made them. The bracelets were stupid though, really.

A hand landed on my shoulder, “Earth to (Y/N),”

“Huh? Sorry,” I said.

“I asked if you wanted to come with us to the party,” Shawn spoke and gave me a pleading look.

“Um, my boss is expecting me bright and early tomorrow. I gotta head home and get some sleep,” I said.

Hunter handed me my bag, “ See ya, (Y/N/N). I’ll call you later,”

“I’m counting on it,” I said and gave his hand a squeeze before hugging Chyna goodbye.

“Shawn, I’m so happy for you and I hope you have fun tonight. I love you. Don’t get too drunk,” I joked, gave him a tight lipped smile and made my way out of his dressing room.

home

Truth was, I was off work the rest of the week. I knew that lying to my best friend wasn’t right, but I couldn’t sit there and listen to Pamela’s annoying ass voice. Besides, I’m sure I’ll hang out with him soon, probably with Hunter and Chyna.

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my body. My hand wiped away the condensation from my mirror and I just stared at myself. I took in my appearance, wishing that somethings about me were different. A sigh left my lips and I rubbed my eyes, feeling sleep upon me.

“You take the longest showers,”

I jumped, gripping my towel tighter around my body as I looked at my best friend sitting on my bed. He was out of his ring gear, now sporting jeans and a black shirt. His hair was down in its waves, making me incredibly jealous of how pretty it looked. He always managed to take my breathe away.

I just stared at him, “What are you doing here?”

“You left. You declined my offer of going to a fun ass party. You’ve been ignoring me for weeks and I can’t figure out why. You haven’t been acting like yourself,” he spoke, playing with his bracelet. The one I made him.

“I told you. I have to be up early tomorrow for work,” I said.

He stood up, his fists clenched, “When are you gonna stop lying to me?”

“I’m-“

“And don’t give me some bullshit answer. I’m so fucking over the bullshit! I need you to be honest with me, (Y/N). Please pretty girl,” he said.

“If I’m honest with you, our friendship will be ruined. I can’t do that. I need you too much, Shawn,” I answered, locking eyes with him.

“Well, you’re ruining it by not talking to me and keeping me in the dark! Just fucking talk to me. For once. Stop being so selfish,”

I clenched my fists tight, “I tell you everything! Heaven for bid I don’t tell The Shawn Michaels one thing. Is it hurting your precious ego?”

“Don’t-“

“Please shut up for one second. You want me to be honest? Well, I’ve been in love with you since I was 19 years old. You drive me absolutely fucking crazy, but I don’t even care. You’re worth all the crazy, Shawn! You’re worth all the heartache, all the tears, all the laughs, all the smiles, and all the memories. I love you so much that it hurts,”

He stared at me. Just stared at me. I could feel my heart begin to ache, tears swelling up in my eyes. My dumbass had just ruined the one great thing in my life because I couldn’t keep my damn mouth shut. I should’ve just tried to move on from Shawn, but I guess in a way I would’ve just hurt myself more. And hurt the person I tried to move on with.

“C-Can you please leave?” I whispered, my voice cracking.

“Pretty girl, don’t push me away. Don’t tell me to leave when I know you want me to stay,” Shawn spoke.

“No, you don’t know. You don’t know shit. I want, need, you to leave while I sort through my own shit.” My hands were shaking as I walked over to my dresser. I pulled out underwear, shorts, and a shirt. Shawn’s shirt

to be exact. It was his old Rocker’s shirt.

His hand wrapped around my wrist, “You’re the most amazing person I have ever met, (Y/N). You don’t give a damn about what anyone says or thinks. You speak your mind. You love the hell out of people. You keep me grounded, pretty girl. I can’t lose you. I just fucking can’t. I’m sorry that I don’t feel the same way that you do, but I do love you. I always have, just not in that way,”

“I’m letting you go, Shawn. You go on and do big things with your wrestling. I know that you will. I’ll be watching, I promise,”

Tears were falling down my red cheeks, making my eyelashes stick together. I could feel my heart shatter into a million pieces. The ache was almost unbearable, making it hard for me to catch my breath. Anxiety and sadness were creeping up on me.

I gave Shawn one last forced smile before walking back into my bathroom. My back hit the door and I slid onto the floor, sobs racking through my body. The pain was excruciating. I love you, Shawn.

1 month later

It’s been rough. Really fucking rough. I haven’t seen his face in 4 weeks and it’s been killing me. I miss him. I miss being around to watch him fight. I miss Hunter and Chyna. I miss seeing Mick Foley’s smiley face. I even miss The British Bulldog calling me “The Heart Break Kid’s best friend” because he didn’t know my name. So, I’ve decided to go visit.

My Doc Martins scuffed across the floor as I made my way to Hunter’s dressing room. I figured it would be easiest to see him first instead of Shawn. I made sure I looked decent so no one would see just how bad I’ve been doing. My light wash jeans went great with my Chyna shirt and my leather jacket.

I knocked before I entered Hunter’s dressing room, taking a deep breath. I opened the door and Hunter’s eyes widened. A smile found its way onto my lips at the sight of him. I don’t think I realized just how much I missed being around here.

“Baby girl!” Hunter said, engulfing me in his arms.

I giggled, “Hi!”

“How have you been? I haven’t seen you in like a month. Chyna and I have missed you, dude. He misses you,” Hunter whispered the last part.

“I’ve miss you guys too. That’s why I’m here. I just wanted to come visit since it’s been a while,” I said and smiled.

“Are you gonna talk to him?” he asked.

My mind went blank. I haven’t seen Shawn in quite some time and I don’t know what to say to him. He’s my best friend, but my heart is broken. I told him I was in love with him and got nothing in return. I don’t know if I can face him without breaking down.

I licked my lips, “I told him I was in love with him and he didn’t tell me the same,”

“He’s still you’re best friend though! I get that he hurt you, but you two need each other more than you think. He’s been a wreck without you, baby girl. Go see him,”

Hunter was probably right. I should go see Shawn. It would probably do me some good to see his face again. Just in case it’s the last time I get to see it. I looked up at him, a small smile on my lips.

“Same locker room, right?”

I made my way down the hallway and passed a few familiar faces on the way to Shawn’s locker room. Mick Foley gave me the biggest smile and The British Bulldog addressed me like he usually does. It was good to be back here.

Shawn’s locker room came into sight and I could feel my anxiety creep up on me. What if he didn’t wanna see me? What if he told me to leave? There was so many thoughts running through my head. I looked up and saw I was face to face with his door. It was now or never, I guess. I raised my fist and knocked.

“I already told you I’m-“

The look on his face was pure shock. There was an emotion his eyes that I couldn’t quite pin point. My hands were becoming clammy from nerves. I just wanted him to say something.

I cleared my throat, “If y-you want me to go I can. I just thought maybe it would be good to see each other,”

“(Y/N),” he whispered.

“Hi. Um, do you want me to go? Or?”

Before I could even blink, Shawn had his arms wrapped around my waist and his face in the crook of my neck. My arms snaked around his shoulders. I gave him a squeeze and closed my eyes, taking in the moment.

Shawn sighed, “God, I’ve missed you so fucking much, pretty girl,”

“I’ve missed you too, Michaels,” I mumbled and squeezed him again.

“Did you already see Hunter?” he asked.

I pulled away from him, “Yeah. He was the first person I saw, actually. He was the one who encouraged me to come see you,”

“Well, I’m glad he did. It’s so great to see you again,” he said, flashing me a smile.

“Yeah, it is. It’s much better seeing your face in person and not just on tv,” I spoke.

Shawn grinned at me as he walked over to the couch in his locker room. I noticed that he wasn’t in his ring gear. Instead he was sporting a light brown shirt, black pants, and was just about to grab his leather jacket. I had to admit, he looked damn good. He always looked good.

My hands were still a bit shaky. I’ve been this nervous around Shawn before. Usually I’m pretty calm, cool, and somewhat collected. Maybe I’m this nervous due to the fact that I told him I was in love with him, and he didn’t feel the same way.

“You don’t have to be so nervous around me, pretty girl,”

I looked up at him, “W-What?”

“You’re playing with your bracelet. You only do that when you’re nervous,” he said.

“Shawn I admitted that I was in love with you a month ago. I’m gonna be nervous around you. I can’t help it,” I admitted to him.

“(Y/N)-“

“Look, I just wanted to come and see you. It’s been so long and I felt like it would be good. Watching you on TV isn’t the same as seeing you wrestle in person! I’ve missed the back stage talks, the good lucks, the hugs after matches, the late night dinners, and seeing your cute face every damn day,” I said, my eyes never leaving his.

A knock was heard at his locker room door. I glanced down at my boots and took in a deep breathe. Every time we start to get somewhere, we get interrupted. I’m starting to think that maybe we aren’t meant to have this conversation. A backstage worker peeped his head in to tell Shawn he had 5 minutes.

Shawn grabbed my face in his hands and made my eyes meet his, “Please don’t leave. All I have to do is cut a promo and then I’ll be right back! I wanna finish this conversation, so please wait for me,”

“I waited 9 years to tell you that I was in love with you. I can wait 20 minutes to talk to you, Michaels,” I said, a smile on my lips.

He grinned at me, a twinkle in his eyes. He told me to wait with Hunter while he shot his promo. Shawn pressed a kiss to my forehead before he walked out of this locker room. My heart was so happy. I didn’t realize how much I needed to see him. He was my person, after all.

I strolled down the hallway, on my way back to see Hunter’s locker room, and Bret Hart came into my sight. The expression on his face was pure anger. His jaw was clenched tight, his eyes blazing with fury. Bret locked eyes with me and that’s when I figured it out. Shawn had pissed him the fuck off.

“You! You need to tell your boy to mind his own fucking business and to watch his back!” he yelled, shoving his finger into my chest.

I scoffed, “You need to get out of my face, Bret. What goes on with you and Shawn has nothing to do with me! So, don’t come at me with some dumb threat,”

“Is that so? Well I’ll tell you this much (Y/N), don’t test me. You’ll be the one to take the hit for him if he keeps on with his shit. I will hurt the one person he needs most, and that happens to be you, sweetheart,” he spat at me, venom in his voice.

He patted my cheek with his hand and walked down the hallway. I could feel my whole body shake from fright. My feet carried me to Hunter’s locker room and I walked in, my mind blank. I could feel eyes on me, but I couldn’t make myself look up.

“Baby girl? What happened?” Hunter’s voice rang in my ears.

“Bret,” I whispered.

Chyna grabbed my arm and guided me over to the couch. What Bret said to me was still playing in my head. It was all I could think about. I never would’ve thought that I was afraid of Bret Hart, until today. I was scared of him. Very, very scared of him.

All I wanted was for Shawn to hold me in his arms and tell me that nothing was going to happen to me. Whatever was going on with Shawn and Bret had nothing to do with me. I was pissed that I somehow got brought into it. Bret had no right to do that.

“Pretty girl! Are you okay? What the hell happened?” Shawn came running and sat beside me on the couch, his arm wrapping around my waist.

My eyes met Shawn’s, “B-Bret threatened me in the hallway. He said I would be taking the h-hit for you if you didn’t leave him alone,”

“You don’t even have anything to do with what is going on between Shawn and Bret!” Hunter exclaimed, putting his hands on hips.

I grabbed Shawn’s hand and intertwined our fingers together. His eyes were on my jeans, a far away look on his handsome face. My other hand touched his cheek as I tried to bring him back to me.

“Hunter, can you please give us a minute?” I asked. A small smile was on his lips.

“Sure thing, baby girl,”

Shawn stood from the couch and took his jacket off, throwing it on the floor. I could almost feel the tension that was in the air. I knew that he was pissed. I mean, he hates Bret, but now it’s intensified.

I rose from the couch, cautiously making my way towards my blonde best friend. My hand touched his arm and he sighed. He still didn’t look at me, so I placed my other hand on his hip.

“Shawn, look at me,” I mumbled.

His green eyes met mine, “I’m so sorry. For everything. For what Bret’s bitch ass said to you, which he’ll pay for. I’m sorry for what happened that night at your place. I’m sorry for breaking your heart. But, I’m especially sorry for lying to you,”

“When did you lie to me?” I asked.

“That night. I told you that I didn’t feel the same way you did, but that was a lie. I’ve been in love with since the day I met you,” he said, a smile on his lips.

“Why did you lie?” My eyes burned into his, tears slowly filling them.

Shawn grabbed my hand, “I was scared. I’m not the best person in the world. I’m an asshole who fucks around too much and doesn’t take anything seriously! I always thought that you would never love someone like me. You deserve better, pretty girl,”

I pressed my lips onto his, my hands cupping his cheeks. Sparks shot through my whole body as he kissed me back, passion seeping from his lips. His arms made their way around my waist. This was the best feeling in the whole world. The man I’ve loved for 9 years actually loves me back and is making out with me in his best friend’s locker room.

I pulled away and giggled.

“What’s funny?” Shawn asked.

My thumb rubbed his cheek, “I just thought about how we’re making out in Hunter’s locker room. It wasn’t exactly where I pictured us sharing our fist kiss,”

“Please don’t think about my best friend when I kiss you,” he said, kissing my forehead.

“I’m sorry! It just crossed my mind,”

Shawn gripped my hips a bit tight as he looked into my eyes, “I love you, (Y/N),”

“I love you too, Michaels,”

This is what I’ve been waiting for since I was 19 years old. I’ve been waiting for this kind of love. The kind of love where it consumes you and when all you think about is him. The kind of love that brings a bright smile to you face. The kind of love where you can feel it in your bones. Shawn Michaels has given me that kind of love.

Hunter peeped his head in, a smirk on his face, “It’s about damn time,”

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