secret diary

killbaciller [ˈkɪl.baˌsɪl.ər] (noun, Swedish slang) An informal Swedish term for imaginary germs associated with boys

[killbaciller]

welcome to my little corner feel free to ask me something

[killbaciller]

i am nuts deep in a thc induced manic state of mind releasing my upmost inner thoughts of my brain blessed with an overactive amygdala created with a purpose to be excellent at taking the night shifts watching the cave campfire while my neanderthal family is sleeping. this firewatching caveman brain i have does not fit in with the climate today.

[killbaciller]

_-_-_-

i fucking love vannilla icecream. i dont understand when i hear comments about how bad or bland of a choice vanilla is. for me vanilla is the best flavor of ice cream when it is done right. i am not talking about that white fucking goop u get at a cheap buffet im talking about that rich CREAMY yellow thick vanilla ice cream that has deep notes of vanilla and other roasted honey ish flavors. THAT SHIT IS GOOD.

this opinion of vanilla being the best flavor/smell could extend to MORE ”vanilla” types

why is vanilla used as negative word to describe someone/thing?? i never understand this.

[killbaciller]

i am very high at this moment

[killbaciller]

i love listeing to the muffled machine sounds of a train

[killbaciller]

[killbaciller]

i love walking through this tunnel on my way to work. it is hidden and theres a little river underneath.

[killbaciller]

[killbaciller]

i was extremely high during this and felt the warm rays of sun beaming into me. i remember feeling very close to god. do you feel it?

[killbaciller]

[killbaciller]

i think this urge to collect different belongings stems from me finding it really fascinating when people have jewlery or something inherited from their dead relatives. It’s something that i couldn’t get because my parents immigrated to a new country without being able to bring anything.

[killbaciller]

[killbaciller]

i wanna do this thing where i leave a mark on everything i own that i love, like my favorite shelf, chair or my different trinkets. then when i die when all my belongings that ive cultiviated through my whole life gets into secondhand stores or antique shops or whatever, there will always be a part of me connected to my belongings and in that way i will live forever. my own little mark in life. it would be fun if the new strangers that bought my chair saw my mark and wondered about it. i think this is why i love buying secondhand stuff. i love wondering about who the person who owned this thing before me was

[killbaciller]

0003

[killbaciller]

0002

[killbaciller]

prized possession

[killbaciller]

a little recap of my 2023