king baby

they/them★ nyc ★ aqua sun gemini moon virgo rising

[cyberglittter]

gulabo.bysaraji

[dreamstars]

[kingbabynyc]

notes on eli

eli is a gay

who likes to drink chardonnay

he’s no man of lay

[kingbabynyc]

my early 20s soundtrack by Mithila Chandra

Playlist · 9 Songs

thinking of all the people who broke my heart

and all the people who continue to

and all the love that i still have for

them

myself

my future lovers

grief is merely the greatest expression of love

[kingbabynyc]

septiembre 11

in this dream i was like on a trip or something with and like random people that i made up there im thinking it’s the people from selling oc since i slept with that play but anyway we were at this insane house that one of them (the douche bag) owned and there was a million rooms and pools and hot tubs it was insane it was a hotel ig but the guy owned it and the whole time i was just hanging out with and we were making out a lot and fucking and there was like this one part that i remember really vividly of us being part of a swimming competition and like the douche bag person one and we walked back to our room really wet and like made out in the hallways and there was this other part of like us driving in this dinky abandoned ish town like it was giving freakshow town

[kingbabynyc]

an ode to the end of summer

summer hats n vibes

take a kitten for the road

a chill is coming

[kingbabynyc]

the ferry ride

with my head on the railing

i feel all the bones vibrate in my skull

my soon to be skinless skull

maybe i’ll jump off

and have the water drag me to the bottom of the east river

but i’m coming to see you

so i’ll save the jump for next time

[kingbabynyc]

march 24

there was like two dreams but i only remember the last two so the middle one was like i was given a baby from ben and he was like okay u gotta take care of this baby like for the whole day and it was this huge fat baby and i had like a bunch of errands to run so i had to run the errands with the baby and i think like eli and people were there i forget exactly who but it was like all the homies and they were just on the train w me w this baby and i like almost dropped it and then eli and i went to like this supper market/cafe and stuff and there was like seats there and like different sections of things and we got some stuff and renee showed up and had a bunch of like snacks she let us try some but she apparently bought too many so like she gave us some to take home i also brought some like chocolate and match pastries and then the second dream was like i was at nest or something but it looked really different at times it was a tree house and other times it felt more like a catholic school but like at nest im doing my job and i get an email from like nyclu and they’re like we usually take like 3 days to like decide on moving an applicant to the interview process but we wanna move on w u asap and it was weird bc the person that emailed me was like oh let’s meet after office hours for a drink and that made me wanna kms and then i ran into francoise and they got like a blow out to their hair and it looked really voluminous and then i look at my phone and i got a bunch of texts from aidan and jas and reminders about nova and shrika’s bday jas was like asking if i wanted to meet up w him and his friends at like a restaurant they were going to and stuff and aidan sent a bunch of really long texts being like i’m sorry and i had so many things i wanted to do with you and stuff and there’s pictures idk it was a lot

[kingbabynyc]

march 7

in this dream i was like a student and still working at rolos but mommy and i moved to bangladesh where we lived in this really beautiful house that had a garden an insane bathtub and just really nice we were living there like permanently i was like going to work at rolos and we were having family meal and it was beautiful outside like lush green mountains and then it turned into like school i don’t remember exactly what happened but like henri was there and a fucking nerd which was fitting and then i went home and my mom was trying to convince me to go to this school party

[kingbabynyc]

feb 27

i don’t remember the beginning of this dream too much honestly but i do remember like having my bagel from the fridge and i was eating it and it was like growing mold/blue and tasted sour and then i met up with ella and we got drinks from this place with really low furniture

[kingbabynyc]

feb 24

in this dream i was like staying over at jas’s apt but like in the dream he was like supperrrr feminine in like the way he talked about me like he was gushing over me and shit and we were like hanging out a lot i think i was like living with him or something at that point and he like took some pics of me sleeping and sent it to his friends and had a group chat where they were talking about me and like i was looking at the group chat and he was just saying how much he likes me and how he’s soooooo into me and whatever and my clothing came and i told him to hold onto the package until i could like come get it

[kingbabynyc]

feb 23

in this dream i was like driving at first i was gonna go over to this guys house (not jas) and like id been to his place before and it was super extravagant but i had to go to shrika’s bday party first on the way there jas texts me that he’s around so i cancel on the other guy and tell jassy i’ll come over so i’m like driving through the desert and go to the natural history museum for shrika’s bday and i park my car and go to the museum i walk up the stairs and jesse and his son r there and his son is checking me out and jesse is telling him to stop i don’t dream much about what we do in the museum but like what’s happening with the weather so it’s like raining sooooo hard and flooding everywhere i go down to see how bad it is and like the flood is big enough to where u can’t leave the building and eventually this huggggeeee seal is swimming there and a whale pulls up too and they’re both the same size everyone is freaking out like how do we get out of here and i go upstairs tell everyone to calm down and that the animals r gonna leave soon instead we all chit chat and i make like chichi or someone tell a story i woke up here but then i fell asleep again and the dream like continued i was with jas things we were walking around there were still huge floods but there was like roads and stuff above it so we were walking there he was telling me about stuff and it was really sweet he was like fixing my hair and caressing my face and we were just chatting about our lives and he was like ya im gonna move out of my place now and into a new place with my friend or whatever so ya

[kingbabynyc]

feb 17

in this dream i think i was like going to jas’s place and the way there was like insane there was a river and like all that it was super mystical and stuff and i did this a few times but like one time he like met me at the river and stuff and this place looked a lot like mine in the set up but like the main window was like a big one or something and we were like chatting about our lives and he was telling me this like traumatic story about his life and crying and then there was this part where i was on my phone and looking at my ig and i realized that aidan made me unfollow him but was still following me and that pissed me off right before i woke up there was this family party i was planning and my parents were like making me pick up all these people from the airport and random places

[kingbabynyc]

feb 9

in this dream i was like in an island and i was really scared about swimming in the water because i knew it was deep and i went in there and i was swimming so well and i caught so many fish for everyone to eat and stuff and then i like was in a building that i had to walk into this like tunnel/cave thing and i was like in this other room and there was a bunch of fabrics and stuff really nice ones and i was helping someone like design a dress i think it was tony and tony and i designed this red like lace/floral applique dress with this other black like similar material as the train he asked if i could sew and i lied and said yes and he was like could u pls like make the sleeves and i was like sure i cut the sleeves and i was trying so hard to see them but i couldn’t

[kingbabynyc]

i made a black dress

enticing and elusive

so you see me again

[kingbabynyc]

feb 6

the first part of this dream was that i was like living at home and i had like a gf and she would like sleep over or something every once in awhile and like we were hooking up at my place and my mom kept trying to come in and i like had to lock multiple doors so she wouldn’t and the next day my mom was like feeding me and my gf rice and stuff and then i like had this hair appointment or something and i go there and im running late and it’s also a school and i’m like getting my hair done and my mom is like make it like mine and i’m like absolutely not and i’m like looking on my phone and i c that aidan changed his ig name to some stupid shit like instead of aidan it said neenie or something idk and like he was posting stuff on ig about like making food and he was just smashing and destroying random stuff like hanging out w this girl that looked like the baron harkonnen from dune and i got my hair done and francoise was running late to sub and i went to rolos and i was barbacking and i asked tony where i should leave the food scraps and he showed me this fridge and i woke up

[kingbabynyc]

jan 31

in this dream i was like in school or something i think it was like some sort of fashion school and i was on a break for a month and my mom was in bd so she wanted me to come visit her in bd for awhile i went with soumik we flew together and stuff and we got there and there was this beautiful house we were staying at by this water and i would go swimming in the water and there was all this like mystical creatures there that i became friends with and it was nice then i had to go back but my mom wanted me to stay longer i said i’d go back see what’s up w school and then try to come stay longer i went back to school and some people were like robbing the school or something while i was trying to find the syllabus to figure out what i was gonna be doing about bangladesh