Blerd & Bougie

🌠Est:1992✨ Shae✨Depressed millenial covering my hot mess with glitter✨ Current obsession: none ✨Currently reading: alien porn✨ Forever obsession: sterek🌠

[i-am-a-fish]

I think everyone should have infinite fries. like, a bucket. that appears in everyone's room. decanter of endless fries

[my-purpose-is-gone]

wouldn’t u get sick of them ?

[i-am-a-fish]

they're yummy fries

[jathis]

Always hot and fresh?

[i-am-a-fish]

they're yummy

[selflysss]

Catch me #never

[liarsblade]

*touching his extremely defined six pack* who did this to you.....

[invisiblefoxfire]

*gently lifting a cup of water to his lips* it's going to be okay. *choking back tears* just a few more sips and then we'll get you a sandwich...

[cloverandcrossbones]

Reblog to give a glass of water to every dehydrated actor with shrink wrapped abs whose life was endangered for a shirtless scene

[spin-the-wheel-polls]

you have to get this piercing!

Do you like it?

I have it!

Yes!

yes but I wouldn't get it

No

Wouldn't be worth it

Results/other

Remaining time: 4 days 12 hours

[draizetrain]

i think when u clean your house it should stay clean forever. what do u mean i have to do it again

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason your snacks are unsatisfying is that you need both carb and protein.

Carb starts your engine, protein keeps it going.

No carb, engine don’t start. No protein, engine dies out fast.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Easy carb add on:

Cookie

Fruit (canned or fresh)

Chips

Piece of bread

Popcorn

Crackers

Easy protein add on:

Nuts

Spoonful of nut butter

Cheese

Roasted chickpea snacks

Glass of milk (dairy or non dairy)

Small canned sausages or similar

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sugar in there.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I am pleased by people messaging me telling me that after adding a carb or protein to their snacks or meals they feel more satisfied all day. Yes, my plan is working. People are getting through their days with less hangry.

[kelcipher]

[arkanaea]

Has anyone ever noticed that Amaury Guichon himself looks like he’s made of chocolate? Like his hair is a rich dark brown and is always slicked back, who’s to say that’s not just textured chocolate. And the fact that his facial expression always stays the same is probably because he has chocolate instead of facial muscles

[angel-fruitcake]

i can handle one (1) Event™ per day. whether it be a phone call, an appointment, trip to the grocery store, play date with a friend, etc. only one, that's it. any more than that and i am Stressed

[minxitsy]

[natequarter]

the grim reality for a lot of nonbinary people is that their options are closet themselves and be perpetually misunderstood by the world at large or be out and proud and be perpetually misunderstood by the world at large

[nat-20s]

As an adult I think me and all my friends should all have matching schedules and work like 20 hours a week and also everyone lives within 15 minutes of each other why is that so much to ask

[thexphial]

Old person question

Do you use an actual computer at home?

Yes, a desktop

Yes, a laptop

Yes, both desktop and laptop

No, but I have a tablet

No, I do everything on my phone

Other

Voting ended onJul 29

[magicratfingers]

desperately want to draw want nothing less than to be drawing

[magicratfingers]

this is how many pillows I want

[quintuplequay]

Where does the you go. In this scenario

[magicratfingers]

? what do u mean

[batbetbitbotbut]

Ah another fan of the classic children's roleplay, "neolithic burial"

[magicratfingers]

yeah u get it

[keiachi-chan]

Tumblr jpeg dolls I don't feel like finding the image

[feluka]

i know if your parents are from different countries you can inherit either nationality or both but wouldn't it be more fun if they drew a line between the spot one parent was born and the spot the other parent was born and you got the nationality of wherever the midpoint of that line is? just a thought to spice things up. like if you have one algerian parent and one egyptian parent then you get libyan nationality. it's awesome too because many people would get ocean nationality.

[injuries-in-dust]

Body type: Godzilla